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kristacecilia
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 8:07am | IP Logged
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Dear ladies,
I hope I beg you for some sound advice. I have four kids- two boys almost 7 and 5, and two girls almost 3 and 9 months.
I am struggling being at home and homeschooling them lately. It's a constant battle to get them to do anything- from the older ones getting up to getting dressed to eating.. by the time I get all four of them dressed and fed and the kitchen cleaned and have them do their morning chores I am so spent the thought of doing school makes me want to run away screaming in the other direction.
School is just an extention of the battle. We read aloud, no one wants to listen. I am trying to get my oldest to begin narrations but he 'forgets' what we read (I have a strong suspicion that he is not actually forgetting, he just wants to not do the narration and he knows I won't push if he has 'forgotten') So we battle through all of that. The baby gets into everything. The three year old makes messes and climbs on me all the time and is now starting to hurt the baby.
I just feel like from the time I get up in the morning until the time the kids are in bed it's a constant battle with them. I hate it. I want them to go away.
I feel like a horrible mother entertaining ideas of sending the oldest two to school.
Public school isn't an option we are willing to consider, and the only private school we will consider is out of our budget so there's no other choice anyway.
I am just feeling so trapped.
__________________
God bless,
Krista
Wife to a great guy, mom to two boys ('04, '06) and three girls ('08, '10, '12!)
I blog at http://kristacecilia.wordpress.com/
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JennGM
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 8:44am | IP Logged
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 and prayers, Krista. I think we all have periods like this.
I'd look at a few factors. Are you getting good sleep? Is it interrupted sleep? Are you using a lot of caffeine? would you consider your diet pretty balanced? Taking vitamins? Getting fresh air and exercise? The hard days are always harder when I'm not feeling well, and these things I mentioned above are key items. Too much caffeine puts me on edge...so for peace I need to make sure I'm not intaking too much.
Are you giving yourself some quiet and prayer time? I absolutely need to recharge during the day, and I try to get up earlier to have that quiet time alone so I can prepare myself for the day.
Also, this time of year it's not uncommon to be feeling cabin fever. Perhaps a change of pace to recharge everyone's batteries -- a field trip, or if the weather is good, a long nature study day with a picnic.
Then about the chores and personal care, how do you present these? Is it set every day, do they have visuals or a chart to remember what to do?
Sometimes things like this need a renewal workshop -- Mom needs to walk through step-by-step to remind/show how each step should be done. By showing what is expected helps, so it's not just perceived as Mom being tough one day and lax another.
And the ages of your children are pretty young. How much school work is expected right now? Is it a lot of writing? A lot of seatwork?
For my son who is 7, I don't expect a lot of sitting and writing. I try to streamline and change up so that it's not a dreaded school.
I also give some play time in the morning before school at this age, because interaction with siblings and using the imagination are important tools of learning. It's a much easier transition to start school after the boys have had time to play and relax.
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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JennGM
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 8:51am | IP Logged
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Oh, and as far as the constant mess -- we have that, too. It seems as soon as I focus attention for school, disaster happens. And I only have two boys!
If I know the little one is playing and not being disruptive, I leave him alone. We try to have certain times of the day where we clean up the messes...
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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kristacecilia
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 10:47am | IP Logged
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Jennifer,
I think you hit multiple nails on the head. The first of which is eating well. I have recently started to suspect that I am going to have to give up eating carbs permanently. When I eat them I get headaches, fatigue, even stomach aches occasionally. This leads right into being short-tempered and impatient with the children. I went all last week without eating carbs and felt great, but yesterday I ate as I was before and here I am today, feeling tired and impatient. I didn't even make the connection until you suggested the diet link. So I will just add that to my mounting pile of evidence that carbs- particularly refined white grains- and I don't get along.
Secondly, you are right about the cabin fever. Spring is SOCLOSE here. We keep getting glimpses and it's driving me crazy. I want to send the kids outside! They do go out even in the depths of winter, but it's just not as enjoyable for them, and they don't stay out as long.
As for school, we are pretty low key. Both my school-aged kids are at least one grade ahead, both read very well. So we do have some lessons at the table, but I keep them short and vary them with non-table lessons. Most of our lessons are read a-loud from living books or activity oriented. The narration with my oldest is becoming very frustrating. I have been letting it go and letting it go because he seems resistant, but I feel like he's ready to start and now just being stubborn. Maybe I will start another thread on that in another section.
Thanks for your help. I sent the older three out for awhile this morning and we're just doing some low-key reading and listening to some Wee Sing this morning. It seems to be helping. I have managed to eat two low carb/high protein-veg meals so far and I can feel my mind clearing and my energy boosting.
Hopefully this will pass....
__________________
God bless,
Krista
Wife to a great guy, mom to two boys ('04, '06) and three girls ('08, '10, '12!)
I blog at http://kristacecilia.wordpress.com/
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Grace&Chaos
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 11:00am | IP Logged
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Krista, and  for you.
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Blessings,
Jenny
Mom to dds(00,03) and dss(05,06,08,09)
Grace in Loving Chaos
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mamaslearning
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 11:25am | IP Logged
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Is there a way to get help? Could your husband help you get the kids up, dressed, and eating before he leaves if his schedule allows? This might mean starting your day earlier than normal  , but could be worth it.
If you want to be "tough", you could teach them a morning routine, practice it for a week or so and then implement the *if you are not dressed and eating when I put breakfast on the table then you get no food until lunch* rule. I'm not too concerned about the order in which my kids do morning chores and dressing (either before or after breakfast), but if they do not come to breakfast, they do not eat (or they eat it cold/soggy if they dawddle too long).
As for school, my 2 yo is also disruptive some days. I leave the TV on in the other room for a distraction for awhile, then he joins us and loves to peel crayons. He will also color or put stickers on paper, and various other Montessori inspired activities. After the first break (drink, fruit, and laundry changeover), I send my 4.5 ds to play with his brother and my 7 yo dd finishes up her work. The 6 month-old either nurses, plays on the floor next to us (he's already crawling), or I put him in an exersaucer.
I hope others are able to provide some other ideas.
Oh, I almost forgot - Prayer! I pray constantly for the grace to be their mother.
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Lara
DD 11, DS 8, DS 6, DS 4
St. Francis de Sales Homeschool
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: March 14 2011 at 11:35am | IP Logged
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One more thing to consider on diet.. some things can be hereditary and you might want to consider if your kids might also be having problems because of diet.
If your 7 yr old is feeling self conscious doing narration with you (are siblings around then too?) it might work better to have him do narration with dad in the evening. He could be taken aside so it's more private AND it's special time with dad (be sure dad knows to praise him lots to start).
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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VanessaVH
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| Posted: March 15 2011 at 11:05am | IP Logged
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I was about to come here this morning and make the same post! The only difference is ages 5, 3, 2 and being 7 months pregnant. ((((((Hugs Krista)))) I hope you find some relief, and thanks to everyone else for the ideas!
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Wife to Mark, Mommy to 4 boys:Luke '05, Eric '07, Nicholas '09 Nathaniel '11
http://butterflyandbullfrogs.blogspot.com/
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: The Constant Battle
