Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: 5 yr old little boy aways grabbing his Post ReplyPost New Topic
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dolorsofmary
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Posted: Aug 06 2010 at 1:01pm | IP Logged Quote dolorsofmary
privates! He just had his well checkup and they ruled out urinary tract infection. They said that I should just ignore him when he grabs himself, he is probably doing it because it feels good and/or he wants attention.

he just turned 5 and i want to teach him the faith but all in due time. he is too young to sin. He has admitted to me that it feels good when he grabs himself.

I do bath him regularly so I know he is not dirty.

So not sure what to do. I ask him to go to the potty when he does that, but then he stops and says he does not have to go. So not sure what to do.

help please. He does it no matter where he is at, in public, at home, etc.
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Mackfam
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Posted: Aug 06 2010 at 1:22pm | IP Logged Quote Mackfam
This is not an abnormal thing for small boys, dolors. This is a good thing for your husband to handle. My husband helped me understand that not all touching in this area is meant for pleasure-seeking. Sometimes there is a legitimate need for an adjustment for comfort reasons. So....check undies for fit, and check shorts too. Bottoms which are too tight and/or restrictive can cause excessive adjusting.

Daddy first explains very simply that there are ok ways we can touch our bodies and there are ways that are not ok. It's fine to clean ourselves in the bath, and make small adjustments when necessary, but adjustments are politely done out of the way, preferably in the bathroom or after dressing. Daddy explains that a young man cannot hold or touch for long times - that's not ok. That's it for the explanation.

Then, in the day-to-day, I do not embarrass or make a big deal about it when a young boy reaches in this manner. If it's clear they are making an adjustment and do so regularly and in public so that it's a distraction for others (myself), I ask Daddy to speak to son again about appropriate/polite ways of doing this. If it is inappropriate touching, I simply quietly but firmly say, "hands away." And we don't dwell, we move right along with life.

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Lori
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Posted: Aug 06 2010 at 1:39pm | IP Logged Quote Lori
Great response, Jen...thank you.

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dolorsofmary
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Posted: Aug 06 2010 at 9:27pm | IP Logged Quote dolorsofmary
Thank you so much!
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MaryM
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Posted: Aug 06 2010 at 10:22pm | IP Logged Quote MaryM
Previous threads in the Mothering forum have discussed this topic. I could only find this one. Maybe some ideas there would be helpful to you.

Boys playing with...


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KC in TX
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Posted: Aug 06 2010 at 10:39pm | IP Logged Quote KC in TX
I know that in Texas with the heat, there's a lot more adjusting. My son explained that things were sticking, if you know what I mean. Now, he just does a little squat and it apparently works.   

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