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Cassandra Forum Rookie
Joined: Feb 28 2005
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Posted: March 09 2005 at 8:28am | IP Logged
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Hi!
My name is Cassandra and my introduction is over at the fireside . I thought this might be a safe place to ask this...so here goes!
My first three children are 15 months apart, and my last two are 16 months apart. My body's cycles begin post partum again around 5-6 months. After deliveries I seem to get a lot of questioning about birth control and what we are planning on using from the medical profession. It has been said to me that my body needs time to rest. How do you all respond? Is this a valid concern? I also am an RN, so the medical talk is something I can discuss with understanding. But when talking from Heaven's perspective it is usually more difficult to relay and explain to others.
Any experience you all may have is appreciated!
__________________ Cassandra
Wife to Jeremy and Mom to 5 little lambs
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Bridget Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Michigan
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Posted: March 09 2005 at 9:30am | IP Logged
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The medical profession does put the heat on, but I think they have very little real experience with moms of many.
Most of mine are just under 2 years apart, but I know many moms who have many more than I, closer together. They really don't have any medical problems from having many close together. Generally they are diligent about being good stewards of their bodies, making an extra effort to take care of themselves.
I deliver at a Catholic hospital with a Catholic, NFP only OB, so I don't get hassled about birth control. My friends who deliver elsewhere and do get hassled, usually say something like 'we use natural spacing' or go further and talk about allowing God to plan their families and how children are always and only a blessing.
My dear friend, a mom of 17, had her last by c-section. Our doc, noted that her uterus is in perfect condition.
Pregnancy and childbirth can be harder on our bodies as we get older. But we have learned to work smarter and, hopefully, have trained our older children to help us.
Most people cannot understand this or even that we might be WILLING to suffer for the sake of more children if that is what God is calling us to do.
And, yes, this is a safe place to talk about this. Going against popular culture to have many children can be a challenge. It's such a blessing that we can encourage each other here.
__________________ God Bless,
Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
Our Magnum Opus
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Mary G Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: March 09 2005 at 11:09am | IP Logged
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I get this all the time too -- not just from the MDs, nut from "well-meaning" friends (some really good Catholics too).
All I know is that Mom had six of us roughly 1 year apart -- and she's healthy as the proverbial horse (could be because we never could afford help, so she stayed in shape keeping after us )
My older two are 2 years apart (almost exactly), then a big gap -- I was widowed -- then the next two are 13 mos apart (and didn't THAT cause controversy amongst the pundits ) Then then a 3 year gap. I'd love to have another (and this would a 3 year gap also), but we'll see.
I think "optimum" is God's say in the overall plan --
Does this help?
Blessings
__________________ MaryG
3 boys (22, 12, 8)2 girls (20, 11)
my website that combines my schooling, hand-knits work, writing and everything else in one spot!
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Cassandra Forum Rookie
Joined: Feb 28 2005
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Posted: March 09 2005 at 6:09pm | IP Logged
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My last midwife reassured me that God made us to have children, and if we are conceiving then our bodies are ready for it. With this pregnancy (new baby Abigail on Feb. 19 ) I had switched groups due to the break up and moving of the previous practice (an hour away ). I guess I was taken aback with being questioned so frequently on something that is so personal and spiritual in nature for my husband and myself. It is surprising to encounter the expectation that we wouldn't want any more. It is not often you get to see a large family up close where I am from. I gladly embrace breaking the mold!! Thank for the input!
__________________ Cassandra
Wife to Jeremy and Mom to 5 little lambs
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TradCathMom Forum Rookie
Joined: Feb 20 2005 Location: Wisconsin
Online Status: Offline Posts: 94
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Posted: March 09 2005 at 11:13pm | IP Logged
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I've had 7 babies in 10 years of marriage, they are between 13 and 19-1/2 months apart. The later deliveries have been very quick and "easy" (using the term loosely of course). My grandma had 12 and ran a farm. I heard that alot of the weaken of the uterus is due to contraception and poor diet.
I delievered the first 3 at a big hospital and it was awful, everyone, even dietary asked about our contraception intentions?! The next 4 were delivered at a small hospital and only 1 nurse treated me poorly (like I was some kind of stupid person who can't figure out how to get herself out of this fix) the others all say "see ya next year". It's been wonderful at the small hospital However I told the doctor we don't use contraception and I don't want to hear about it, that was the end of the conversation. We have a wonderful doctor so i'm very grateful.
The replies to this thread are beautiful. Cassandra, I think this is just all a part of our cross on this earth.
__________________ Julie
Wife to Tom
Mother of 11
Julie's stuff
Trinity Acres
JMJ * AMDG
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lmrook Forum Newbie
Joined: Feb 21 2005
Online Status: Offline Posts: 6
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Posted: March 14 2005 at 11:37pm | IP Logged
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Hi Cassandra,
I'm not sure how to reply to the medical professionals, other than putting it out there like Julie said. Tell them you won't be using contraception and you don't want to hear about it!
If you feel you want to be more of a witness to the faith, you could come up with an answer ahead of time for when this topic arises. Or you could order some pamphlets from "One More Soul" and just hand those to whoever has all the questions.
AS for concerns . . . I guess my attitude is that if you are naturally breastfeeding (meaning BF baby on demand, around the clock . . . no pacifiers or mom-imposed schedules) . . . then you are using your body as it was intended. We were made to procreate. Our bodies are made to be pregnant and breastfeed, not to cycle month after month, year after year.
Just my 2 cents!
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