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jenk Forum Pro
Joined: Jan 25 2008
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 3:37pm | IP Logged
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We've been dealing with fears of our 8yo ds for a few months. His fears manifest mainly at night but today, I'm sitting on the couch in broad daylight with him howling because he's afraid of the devil. I know I sound uncaring but I'm not, we've just been talking and praying and advising, explaining, and quoting fear related scripture for months. Today, I've read scripture suggested prayer and he's still crying. I'm just not sure what to do. Fears range from being afraid of the devil coming for him to someone breaking into the house. We're usually very careful about TV and have been even more so with this development. I'm at a loss. Any advice???
__________________ Jen
with 2 boys, 14 and 8, and a girl expected 1/09
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teachingmyown Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 20 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 3:52pm | IP Logged
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Get him a St Michael the Archangel prayer card and teach him the prayer.
This seems to work for my worriers.
__________________ In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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Barbara C. Forum All-Star
Joined: July 11 2007 Location: Illinois
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 4:00pm | IP Logged
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Maybe you need some outside assistance...maybe a priest to start off with. However, he may have the beginnings of an anxiety disorder. I know that a lot of people on here swear by looking at diet to effect mood and such, too.
Prayers...
__________________ Barbara
Mom to "spirited" dd(9), "spunky" dd (6), "sincere" dd (3), "sweet" dd (2), and baby girl #5 born 8/1/12!!
Box of Chocolates
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Angie Mc Board Moderator
Joined: Jan 31 2005 Location: Arizona
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 4:22pm | IP Logged
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Dealing with fear is common among 8 yos. They're coming out of young childhood and "seeing" the big world with new eyes. Can you ask him about his thoughts - what thoughts are triggering his fears? Perhaps you'll find some distortions that you can help him with. For example, ask, "What makes you think the devil is going to get you?" Answer, "Because he's mean and invisible." "That's true but you are *magnifying* his power - making him bigger and more powerful than he really is." Then, you could get a magnifying glass and something small like a paper clip. Say, "See this paper clip. Is it big or small?" "Small." "Right. Now look at it under the magnifying glass. How does it look?" "Big." "Right again, but is it really big?" "No" "Right again and again. You are afraid in a big way because your thoughts are making the devil bigger than he is. Now, who is really Big and WAY bigger than the devil?" "God" "Right! And all the saints and angels are WAY Bigger too. So let's practice keeping the devil small and making God Big. Every time you get scared like this, let's say, 'God is Big and loves me very much!'. We can also pray to St. Michael - who is really big and strong too."
For the fear of someone breaking into the house, you can help him to see that he is "disqualifying the positive"...your home is safe, your neighborhood is safe...no one has ever broken in before...etc. Help him to see the positive.
Ooops...I got long winded and now I need to run. Praying for you, Jen, and for your ds.
Love,
__________________ Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
About Me
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cornomama4 Forum Pro
Joined: June 20 2007
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 4:48pm | IP Logged
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When one of my boys was having a lot of anxiety he saw a counselor who eventually gave him the tool of a "worry bag". He wrote his worries on a piece of paper and put them in his worry bag. Then he didn't have to think about them anymore. His worries were about true concerns but he exaggerated them so much in his mind he got obsessed with them. Like the baby drowning in the tub (even though I was right there, he still had to be there to make sure baby was OK) and the baby falling down the stairs. It all resolved in about 4 months. HTH
cm4
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Erin Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Australia
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 5:56pm | IP Logged
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Holy Water. I have a child who occasionally has visions, holy water works wonders, he can always go back to sleep once doused.
__________________ Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
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jenk Forum Pro
Joined: Jan 25 2008
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 8:14pm | IP Logged
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Thank you all so much for the good advice. I was feeling so sad for him and frustrated and out of ideas. You have all given me hope and I feel renewed energy to tackle this situation... I am certain that I can use these ideas to help him. I really appreciate it. It's hard to see him so upset, and I know it's not a good place for him either.
Thank you!!
__________________ Jen
with 2 boys, 14 and 8, and a girl expected 1/09
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