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amyable
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I haven't been slinging/carrying my 27+ lb 20 month old much for a variety of reasons.
I currently have a home made Mei Tai. He doesn't seem to like it - I think part of the reason is my poor construction (  it's a little wide which doesn't carry him as comfortably.
We want to get out and about more this summer, and I'd love something that will *work* for him. Preferably a back carry.
Are the ergos/patapums so much better than a mei tai that he may actually not fight being carried? 
Are Ergos or Patapums better for a 1.5 year old? What about napping?
Anything else I should know before I sell my firstborn to pay for one? 
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Amy
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The Highly Sensitive Homeschooler
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pattonhouse6
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| Posted: May 27 2009 at 7:56am | IP Logged
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Amy,
I have the Ergo and love it. My son is 14 months and 30 pounds...a hefty fella. I put him in the Ergo on my back and go. I even did an outdoor hike several weeks back and it was fine. He will fall asleep in the Ergo...we snap the head cover over his head and go. And, it is not too hard to put him down out of the Ergo if he is asleep. I usually have a couple extra sets of hands around to help out with getting him in and out though.
The Ergo is pricey, but I think well worth the money. I have never regretted the purchase.
HTH
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Bookswithtea
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I have never used a mei tai, but I love love love my Ergo. I put my 3 yr old in it without a problem, a year ago, and my 1.5 yr old (over 20 lbs) lives in it now.
He naps in it all the time when I am shopping.
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mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and  due 9/10
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teachingmyown
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I will be the dissenting voice about the Ergo. What I didn't like about it was that the kids (two and almost a year at the time) would lean out to one side and my back would start to hurt.
There are other carriers that go up higher on the back that prevent this. I have a Beco Butterfly II now and like it much better. It is longer and keeps the kids centered better on my back. Also, it is very easy to move the child from front to back by yourself.
When I was shopping for a carrier, I found thebabywearer.com to be a great place for information and opinions. Those ladies have tried everything.
If it were a choice between an Ergo and a Mei Tai, I would choose a mei tai. I liked my Kozy better than the Ergo. It was just so much fabric which isn't great for summer.
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wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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knowloveserve
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Another dissenter here. I think Ergos/Patapums have a great place in the babywearing world, but that they definitely "expire" at a certain age/height of baby for just the reasons Molly mentioned--leaners. You CAN opt for a Toddler Patapum, which I've tried and found supportive and comfy but there are many buckles and snaps and I wasn't a fan of that. I stop using my patapum at about 15 months, they are just too short.
Not all mei tais are created equally  You might find that trying out different brands would be helpful. Is there a babywearing group near you?
Also, what are the dimensions of the mei tai you have (just the body part, not straps)? Just curious because generally wider bodies are BETTER for older babies.
(I also make mei tais and can give you an idea of widths and heights and different brands, comfort etc.)
If you definitely want a soft structured carrier LIKE an ergo that is GREAT for bigger babies, I'd recommend a Kanga X (or XT)... she does beautiful work and her carriers are superbly comfortable. You will end up paying a bit more for it (she does customs also)... but I think of it as an investment. You can also hunt around on the For Sale/Trade forum at thebabywearer.com to buy one second hand.
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Ellie
The Bleeding Pelican
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anniemm
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I carried my chunky toddler around in my Ergo without issue until I was visibly pregnant and couldn't take the pressure on my abdomen anymore.
I love my Ergo and can't wait to use it again soon.
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Andrea
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SusanJ
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| Posted: May 28 2009 at 8:19pm | IP Logged
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I've tried both and I'm definitely a big, big Ergo fan. We carry our kids well past two years in them and I can really go for hours and hours even with heavy kids.
Susan
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knowloveserve
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It's true, everyone has their favorites! You have to find what works best for you which is why attending a babywearing group would be tremendously helpful for you. I do know some folks who like their Ergos/Patapums long after I'd wear them.
(Just have to say though, regarding Andrea's pregnancy comment... many mei tais have unpadded waists which makes them great for wearing while pregnant, either below the tummy or above it. Here's a picture of me wearing my 2 1/2 year old at 30 and 34 weeks pregnant, the straps could've all been tied above the belly to have him higher on my back if I wanted, but I prefer the weight on the hips.)
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Ellie
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aneliese
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I've "carried" a variety of these carriers in our line and for 95% of people the Ergo definitely has worked the best. I have people come over and try on all of the options, soft frame carriers, mei tai, wraps, etc. It really is a matter of personal preference BUT at the same time there are a few that generally work for most people and the Ergo is definitely one of them.
Unless you're out of the body frame range or you have a child who likes to be completely covered (or has to be if you have a leaner) then the Ergo is usually the way to go. On our overseas trip my husband was still carrying our sleeping 5 year old (39 pounds) around the airport in the Ergo.
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anniemm
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That's awesome Ellie! I wish I could do that, it would make my life so much easier. I also have chiropractic issues that prevent carrying a toddler and being pregnant. Plus, the mai tais are always SO cute!
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Andrea
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teachingmyown
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I will second Ellie's babywearing group advice. I know it sounds odd to have groups focused on babywearing, but it can be really helpful to meet with other moms and see and try what they are using. You can find a local one by searching on thebabywearer.com.
The hardest part about deciding is the price of the carriers. Again, if you get on thebabywearer.com, there is lots of buying and trading going on which can help with the cost or with selling something you aren't using.
Good luck!
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wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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Can't compare with a Patapum, but Helen and I were just using our Ergos today for our 1 1/2 year olds on an outing and doing great. I like the buckles and ease of use. I kept forgetting my son was on my back until he started moving. And I still can do the front carry, too.
He's about your little guy's weight, maybe a bit less. Helen's daughter weighs a bit more. We were both swearing by the Ergos today. So nice when you can't use the stroller.
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Jennifer G. Miller
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Mackfam
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I just finished schlepping (is that a word? it's how I felt! ) through Costco with my 15 month old in my ERGO. I'm another believer. Today, she was up front, but many, many times, she's on the back. I swear by the ERGO! Easy to use, comfortable for the baby, and my back doesn't hurt after wearing her.
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amyable
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Coming back to read all this great advice and Ergo kudos - and to say I just bought a Patapum! Actually it was a Patapum Toddler, if that makes any difference. 
It was used and I got a good deal I didn't want to pass up. I'll see how I like it...then try an Ergo or Kanga XT, or Beco if I don't. Or a better Mei Tai. Or...or...or... isn't it amazing (and scary ) how many different carriers are out there? And I thought cloth diapers were bad.
Thanks again, everyone!
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Amy
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RamFam
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Another cheap way to see if you might like a simple mei tai is to sew your own. I did and I love it. It's very simple to sew and also fun to pick your very own fabric.
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Leah
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knowloveserve
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amyable wrote:
Coming back to read all this great advice and Ergo kudos - and to say I just bought a Patapum! Actually it was a Patapum Toddler, if that makes any difference.
It was used and I got a good deal I didn't want to pass up. I'll see how I like it...then try an Ergo or Kanga XT, or Beco if I don't. Or a better Mei Tai. Or...or...or... isn't it amazing (and scary ) how many different carriers are out there? And I thought cloth diapers were bad.
Thanks again, everyone!
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I think you'll like it a lot. There's a wee bit of a learning curve but once you get the hang of the different buckles and such, you'll be quite comfortable in it. And yes, a toddler patapum is much different from a regular; it's probably perfect for your baby's age and you'll be able to use it comfortably for quite some time!
(It can be overwhelming how many different options there are, yes!!)
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Ellie
The Bleeding Pelican
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amyable
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OK, got the Toddler Patapum last night. I thought I was just too exhausted to do it right, and took it off after only a minute.
Tried again this morning.
I hate it. 
I mean, it's in great condition, looks like a great carrier, but doesn't seem to be fitting us well AT ALL.
I'm kind of small (5'4" but petite boned), I can't seem to get the belts tight enough and he sits way down low, like he's hanging. The shoulder straps don't get any smaller. After less than a minute my neck and back were all out of whack and hurt. I'm going to try one more time ... then would anybody like a nice, used Patapum?
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Amy
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JennGM
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Oh Amy, I'm so sorry! Do keep trying a little more. It took me some time to get used to my Ergo.
Your thread made me think about getting something else for the back carrries and as my son gets older. I really really like my Ergo, but I can't put it on alone. If I do it alone the fit is never right.
So I went to looking and found this site, which only carries Soft Structured Carriers that put the majority of the weight on the hips. That's the dream about the Ergo.
This comparison chart made some good points about which carriers are better for petite people. I was thinking that you were tall, Amy. 5'4" is tall to me, but still small, but you do have a petite frame, so perhaps if you are adventurous enough to try again, maybe something for the petite frame?
It says Ergo isn't for petite, and I do understand that evaluation. It still works for me, though.
Did you look at the Beco Butterly?
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Jennifer G. Miller
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amyable
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Thanks Jennifer! That link is great (you need to add an "L" to the htm though. )
I'll give it a good read-through and try again! I really want this to work.
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Amy
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amyable
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OK, I think I just realized that what I bought was NOT a real Toddler Patapum.  I don't know what it is, but the weight limit on the tag isn't 65 lbs, it's "16-40 lbs". But it's long like the Toddler. Weird.
I'm asking about it over at TBW. I'm just here to . I'm so tired of things going wrong with used purchases! Hopefully if it's NOT a toddler like the lady said, she'll take it back and refund my money.
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Amy
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Mei Tai vs. Ergo for heavy toddler
