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Angel
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| Posted: Dec 26 2008 at 9:02am | IP Logged
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It's the day after Christmas. So far, two plastic swords have been taken away indefinitely, a wooden train set has been removed from use (using the tracks as an axe, using as the stage for robot "damage"), and the baby chewed the pen on the electronic globe and broke it. Wooden pirate ships have been threatened with removal for ramming.
Is this normal??? As usual at our Christmases, there is too much stuff... once again we tried to tell my mil to give less stuff and once again too much stuff has appeared. But is this sort of destructiveness normal for boys? I grew up with only sisters, so I have no idea. I can't even put out a child-sized broom without it being used as a lance, a gun, a sword, an axe to chop down "trees"... I'm talking about my little boys here, ages 5 and 3 yo twins, but they're teaching the same traits to my toddler. After seeing one of his 3 yo brothers lay waste to the train set, he went up and started doing the same thing, throwing wooden signs with merry abandon.
Christmas day was good, everyone was happy, so I don't mean to be a Scrooge, but -- ??? We didn't even make it an entire day!!
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Angela
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Madam J
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| Posted: Dec 26 2008 at 9:15am | IP Logged
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I can't really offer much help with the destruction, but maybe were they hopped up on sugar the last 24 hours? I think the pure excitement, plus the added sweets and treats helps to make my boys a bit bolder and more active, and even unreasonable (the whining is getting to me today). I try to cut them some slack in general, especially with the added in-law gifts and things beyond your control AND the children's control.
My DH is running around with my three big boys right now shooting nerf guns at plastic cups through a slinky for added difficulty, (who knew that would be the hit of Christmas?) while I warn, "if you hit my baby, it's all over".
I am sorry that so many things have been ruined already and hopefully things will calm down for you. I feel your pain.
Peace,
J
PS During the typing of this, it got to be too much, and DH had to confiscate the guns. Now they all have to go read the books they got for Christmas for a few minutes. 
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sewcrazy
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| Posted: Dec 26 2008 at 10:00am | IP Logged
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Its "normal" here also.  My mother gave the 4 year old a Light Saber  that is alreay gone, the Speed Racer remote control car is wound hopelessly in yarn, and a drum stick is in half.
I was up late last night putting most of the new gifts up and away to be taken out as the winter doldrums hit. As always, too much stuff.  I find some of the problem is that the stuff is eveywhere and when you look there is just so much. When my kids have too much they become careless and disrespectful with their posessions.
And we still have another round of family (and presents ) this weekend.
LeeAnn
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LeeAnn
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LeeAnn
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| Posted: Dec 26 2008 at 6:27pm | IP Logged
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I have one boy, he's 2.5. When he's really tired we can tell because he inevitably starts destroying things. We call him Destructo-Boy. Pulls the books off the bookshelf. Starts throwing train tracks, etc. He went down for an early nap today after completely missing it today. He'll go to bed early tonight too. In my very limited boy experience, destructiveness seems to be an outlet for being tired, cranky and out of the normal routine. Naps and early bedtimes for all!
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Martha
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| Posted: Dec 26 2008 at 8:14pm | IP Logged
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well...
I think if one gives weapons and war toys (sabers and pirates!) then one should expect them to enact war on someone or some thing. What's the point other wise? Even my girls would do it. *I* would do it!
Aside from that, yes it's normal, but I don't let them get away with it. Much. 
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melanie
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Yep. It's normal. Sorry. 
I grew up with two younger brothers...ah, the stories I could tell you of things they did to my stuff!! Now I have two boys, and wow, they are really hard on stuff. Even when they aren't trying, they just seem to destroy furniture and stuff with just plain old daily use so much more quickly...
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Sarah
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| Posted: Dec 26 2008 at 11:20pm | IP Logged
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5 boys here. Completely normal. You did the right thing. Just keep trying and redirecting. Pray a lot and occasionally lock yourself in your bedroom and cry.
Just wait for brotherly fist fights after icy snowballs spark rage. Don't ask me how I know. We don't put up with fighting and it sure tugs at a mother's heart.
Then later you hear peaceful conversation and see love and friendship again.
Its all normal and not easy. At least once a day I feel completely overwhelmed!
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4 lads mom
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Four boys here....yep...normal....but I agree with everyone else...put some stuff up to bring out about, oh, Feb. 16th...when everyone is going stir crazy!!
I have to laugh.....it is so different with girls, even little toddler girls!!! I come home after grogery shopping for a bit, and find Lily in a diaper and her bright red Christmas Mary Janes....and that is it....and a very harried father, who can't understand "why??!" were the red shoes so important!??!? "She just wouldn't let it go, had to have them on!" Apparently, he couldn't find the right outfit to go with them!! Now...if that were the toddler boys...they would have been chewing on the shoes, or stuffing them in the toilet...or who knows what...or they would've had their boots on
Keep strong, Sister....we moms of many bearing testosterone must be strong!!!!
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stefoodie
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Yup, normal. I try to remind myself this EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. It's good to know other moms are out there questioning it.
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Bridget
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Everything turns into a sword battle of some kind here. Boys are made for battle, it's alright. I do not allow throwing of toys. (That doesn't mean they don't do it, I just don't allow it. ) Dh starts the battles as often as the boys do. He even starts football games in the living room. You just learn not to have any knick- knacks, unless you live in a place where you can send them outside year round.
My boys do have plenty of other interests and can settle with books, crafts or games. But their standard mode of operation is battle. 
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Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
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Bridget
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Since Donna Marie helped me figure out our word for the year in this thread, chivalry, I will post here what we try to teach the kids about sword fighting.
Control your blows, the goal is to have fun not hurt anyone. (Especially older boys against younger boys.)
If someone takes your legs, go down on your knees.
If someone lands a body blow, die a good, dramatic, holy death for the satisfaction of your opponent. (Mine will try to out do each other in good deaths.)
No head blows or blows from behind.
Teach them to freeze when someone yells "hold!" That way when they get too close to furniture or mom or a baby, you can move the game to a safer area without stopping the game. Obeying the hold command is important and obviously some supervision is too. At least in the early years.
These things help the kids learn to have a rousing game that does not deteriorate into a fight. (At least in theory. )
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Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
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folklaur
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Bridget wrote:
Control your blows, the goal is to have fun not hurt anyone. (Especially older boys against younger boys.)
If someone takes your legs, go down on your knees.
If someone lands a body blow, die a good, dramatic, holy death for the satisfaction of your opponent. (Mine will try to out do each other in good deaths.)
Teach them to freeze when someone yells "hold!" |
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uuuummmm.....weird question, I know....but....are you a SCAdian?
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folklaur
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Bridget wrote:
| Boys are made for battle, it's alright. |
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This is oh-so-true.
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Bridget
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cactus mouse wrote:
uuuummmm.....weird question, I know....but....are you a SCAdian? |
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Yes, before kids. Kevin was a knight.
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Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
Our Magnum Opus
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LeeAnn
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Bridget wrote:
cactus mouse wrote:
uuuummmm.....weird question, I know....but....are you a SCAdian? |
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Yes, before kids. Kevin was a knight. |
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At least your "kind" can have a fighting eric indoors. My husband was a Yeoman. Indoor combat archery is not good! Your servant milady... A resident of An Tir
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Lisbet
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6 boys here, and yes, it sounds perfectly normal. (-well, at least I'm that's what I'm tellin' myself!! )
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monique
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Yep, normal around here too! My boys lost their lightsabers after the um, 9 year old hit the 7 year old over the head and cut it. It looked terrible when I first saw it but it was a small cut requiring no stitches. Thank goodness! Riley asked the other day when they were going to get them back. Probably never.......if I have anything to say about it. I didn't approve of them anyway and refused to buy them but they talked their grandmother into them.
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LisaR
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4 boys here, 5 if you count dad, which I often do, and the amazing thing to me is that THEY DO NOT OUTGROW THIS!!!!
It is pretty crazy here when you've got 3 "boys" well over 100 lbs romping all over the place. (plus add the younger two and a little princess to the mix!)
our house is loud.
We don;t get many gifts for Christmas. (each child got I think 2 gifts each and maybe a gift card or item of clothes) so there isn't an increase around this time of year, per se, just year round.
it is harder for me to shoo everyone outside though when it is zero degrees, OR tornado warnings and inches of rain - both of which we are having this week!
sometimes I have to sneak away for a nice hot bath with the fan on to drown out some of the noise, or lock my self in my bedroom to read for 20 min!!
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Dec 27 2008 at 9:30pm | IP Logged
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Bridget wrote:
| Control your blows, the goal is to have fun not hurt anyone. (Especially older boys against younger boys.) |
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I find it's the younger hurting the older because they haven't learned any control yet and my olders do try and keep from hurting the little ones. 
I think I might snitch your rules though. I never connected that my boys got swords with the giving of Prince Caspian. They're now using an interesting combination of broad sword from Prince Caspian and rapier from Zorro and Princess Bride
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: boys and destructiveness?
