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kathleenmom
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What if anything do you expect of your other children when you celebrate a sibling's birthday? Do you expect the elder ones to plan and execute a gift and give it? At what age? Or, do other people's children just GET this and we're just wierd? 
Kathleen
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DH Daniel, Sophia Brigid (97), Russell Powers (99), Honoria Jane (02), John Patrick (05), Brigid Mary Feb. 24, 2007!
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teachingmyown
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You're not weird. It depends on the child. My oldest two don't "get it". The next one down is already Christmas shopping for his siblings. My girls like to give poems and pictures, and also wrap up their own things to give. It gets a little silly at times, but it makes them happy.
I don't know at what age you start requiring it.
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Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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Lara Sauer
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A gift that is required to be given, isn't much of a gift, in my humble opinion.
I think that our society is WAY too focused on material things. It is my hope to be able to help all of my children find non-monetary ways to celebrate life's milestones.
As to the original question, my older children almost always help bake the cake and record the event with the video camera. Also, since our family tradition is for the birthday child to go out to dinner by him/herself with the parents, all of my kids spend the few weeks leading up to each birthday discussing where the birthday child should go, and reminiscing about past dinners. That is probably my favorite part of their participation.
Perhaps you could encourage your older children to present their younger siblings with the gift of their time and talents: spend special time with the younger ones...take them to the park...teach them how to throw a football...write them a story...or bake cookies with them. These are simple pleasures that stay in memory far longer than another toy that they really don't need.
Just my randon thoughts on Monday morning.
Peace.
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5athome
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We do not allow our kids to buy one another gifts at bdays, Christmas, etc. Instead we encourage them to do homemade cards, crafts, etc and participate in making the day fun for the birthday child.
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Margaret
ds '93, dd '96, ds '99,
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ds '08
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Bookswithtea
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I guess we are different...all of my kids from about 4 on up buy for each other's birthdays. They wouldn't have it any other way. For us its not about getting so much as its about the joy of giving. They also pay for it themselves from about aged 6 on (from their allowances). They buy very inexpensive things, but they save for it and purchase and wrap them lovingly and get tremendous joy from it. I also like that its trained them to think ahead a bit. They usually dont' buy anything for themselves starting in Sept. as they know Christmas is coming and want to have money to buy for their siblings. Some common gifts:
for the teenage son--a 67cent two liter bottle of generic soda. also beef jerky
for little girls--stickers
for little boys--a hot wheels car
for the baby--a $1 store rubber ducky for the bath.
Also commonly given: gum, tic tacs, a favorite candy bar (we don't have candy or soda often so having one's own is a big treat here).
Sometimes two kids will go into together on a pkg of binkies for the baby or an inexpensive travel mug for an older child.
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~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and  due 9/10
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SuzanneG
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We do the same as Books. From about age 5, they buy something a dollar or less.....gum, candy bar, soda, hotwheel car, stickers, etc.
Sometimes one parent will make a trip with them to the dollar store and they can pick out something. They pay for it from their allowance.
And, they also make little things too, draw a special picture or make something in the backyard as a surprise. A "fort" or a new "area" to play in once the birthday arrives.
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Suzanne in ID
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SuzanneG
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Also, from about age 5 or so, siblings are in charge of "decorating" the table, deciding where everyone sits, making place cards, etc. And, they always help to make the cake.
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Suzanne in ID
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JodieLyn
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birthdays.. siblings often draw pictures or make a card.. but we don't encourage purchasing gifts.
christmas we do a name drawing between the kids and their local cousins.. so each is only buying one gift.. allowing for a decent $5 gift (not $1 junk multiplied by 8  ).
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teachingmom
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I think I should preface what I say by explaining that birthdays and Christmas are the only times around here when my children receive non-necessities. Our budget doesn't allow for splurges on toys, dvds, etc. just for fun during the year. And honestly, I'm not the type to want to do that. So any "fun" purchases are made by the girls themselves when they are old enough to earn money outside the home. I guess this helps explain why I have no problem with material giving at birthdays and Christmas. Here is what we have done:
When my oldest girls were young, we always helped them give one another gifts for b-days and Christmas. We went to the dollar store and they chose something for each sister that would be specially from them. (At that time, I paid.) That gave them a taste for the joy of giving.
As they got older, they would save their money (earned through very meager allowances, dog walking in the neighborhood, mother's helper jobs, etc.) and we would take a trip to the dollar store, or Five Below, or Target for them to do their own gift shopping. They often work in groups and pool their money to buy a somewhat nicer gift for a sister or dh or me. They LOVE those shopping trips!
My oldest dd in particular is a fantastic gift giver. Now, at age 14, she's thoughtful and generous with the gifts that she buys with her own hard-earned money. Her sisters have followed suit and love planning for gifts for special celebrations.
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~Irene (Mom to 6 girls, ages 7-19)
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Sibling Birthdays
