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mamalove Forum Pro
Joined: May 16 2007
Online Status: Offline Posts: 117
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Posted: May 19 2007 at 10:28pm | IP Logged
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the desire to adopt has been with me for a long time, and was very storng right before i got pregnant with my 3rd child. now that she is 2, i am really feeling called in that direction again.
the only thing is we are not making any extra income, and i have no idea how to even save up enough for a homestudy ($5,000!!) let alone the adoption costs. i want to adopt an older child (4-5) and a younger special needs child internationally. i dont think foster care is for us, because it would be too hard to let them go, and adopting a child from the USA who is waiting might not work for us because we live a very conservative counter cultural life and i dont know how a worldly child would adjust to us, if at all. i know the cost is a big barrier for us right now.
i know the Lord will provide for His will, but i also know he likes to help those that get the ball rolling (if it is His will) themselves.
i just feel at a loss of what to do. i feel my child is out there already, waiting for me to bring him/her home. it is such a strong desire in my heart, and is constantly on my mind.
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mavmama Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 01 2006 Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline Posts: 618
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Posted: May 20 2007 at 1:04pm | IP Logged
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We actually got a home equity loan for our first adoption, then used the tax credit $ from that to start the second. The third was paid in cash--how, I remember thinking--could that be possible? That third time, we felt very very called to bring this child home, and prayed that God would close open/close doors if it was His will. Along the way, everytime we needed more $ for the next step, He would provide a way to get it. Sometimes it was extra overtime or a bonus, and once it was a part time job that was quite lucrative and only a few hours a week. Even until the last few weeks before DH traveled, we were waiting for God's provision.
All this to say....I believe that the Lord will only put a desire in your heart that He will provide for. Pray, pray, pray! May God bless you during this discernment period.
__________________ Liz
Blessed by 4 wonders
dd11, dd911, ds9, ds8
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ShawnaB Forum Pro
Joined: Nov 05 2005 Location: N/A
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Posted: May 20 2007 at 2:46pm | IP Logged
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I just wanted to throw this out there...
My sis and bil recently started exploring state adoption. They are in California, and they were really, really surprised at how affordable it is. I'm sure every state is different. Like you, they are not interested in fostering, but state adoptions happen all the time without fostering first. They were also surprised to learn that there is a great variety in the ages/backgrounds of the children available for adoption, and social workers strive to know as much as they can about each child and each potential family in order to make a good match. In California, there are a series of classes (free) for potential families to attend, in order to be fully educated about the process, and be certain that it is for them. My sister homeschools and is very conservative/counter-cultural as well, and the state agent who she spoke with was very supportive, believing that children do best in families that are already parenting and have a strong faith. (They've seen it time and again.) And homeschooling, in the mind of this social worker, is a plus because it implies strong parental involvement, and plenty of opportunity for bonding.
Of course, they are just in the learning stages, and I have not first hand experience. However, I was surprised by my sister's findings with the state. It may be worth checking into.
__________________ Shawna, wife of Jacob, mom to Abraham 8 Amelia 5 and Jillian & Jonathan age 3 years http://www.psalm121family.com
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Jeanne Marie Forum Newbie
Joined: March 30 2007
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Posted: June 07 2007 at 2:51pm | IP Logged
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Just in case you are considering it, I wanted you to know that we have adopted through our state twice and are waiting for our third child. It has been a wonderful experience. We adopted infants, but I do know other Catholic families who have adopted older children through the state and they too have had a positive experience.
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