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mumofsix
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How much time do you ladies manage to get in per day for your own private prayer time (as opposed to family prayer)? When in the day suits you - early morning, nap time, late at night? Can you guarantee no interruptions then? What kind of prayer do you find suits you best at this time: rosary, Divine Office, other set prayers, Bible, other spiritual reading, meditation, etc?
I am re-thinking this for myself and would love to hear what works for you.
Jane.
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momwise
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I too would love to hear what works for others. I love to pray Morning Prayer right after I get up if no one is up yet and we aren't leaving for Mass.
One morning per week I take everyone to Mass and another day I go with just a couple of older dc and leave baby home sleeping.
I have a weekly adoration hour where I always fight to stay awake  . This is about the only time I can guarantee there won't be interruptions. This is where I try to do a little spiritual reading.
__________________
Gwen...wife for 30 years, mom of 7, grandma of 3.....
"If you want equal justice for all and true freedom and lasting peace, then America, defend life." JPII
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Kathryn UK
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I try to say Morning and Evening Prayer from the Divine Office. I do better with Evening Prayer which I say as soon as I get into bed. Morning Prayer is erratic  . One of my new year's resolutions was to get through a book of spiritual reading each month. That fizzled out by March.  . I am praying the Rosary in bits, a decade at a time, mostly when awake at night nursing Naomi. I rarely get through a whole Rosary, but I reckon two or three decades is better than nothing. When we start our next school year I'm planning to add in daily Mass once a week, taking one of the older girls with me and leaving the other home with dh (who works from home a couple of days a week). After Mass we will go out for a drink and biscuits and a bit of one-on-one time. They will alternate weeks.
PS. Jane, what time did you get to bed ????
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Kathryn
Dh Michael,  Rachel(3/95) Hannah(8/98) Naomi(6/06)  (11/07)
The Bookworm
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graciefaith
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Right now, none. I use to so much but i've put it off lately. I really need to get back to praying privately each day. We do pray the rosary though as a family. Dh is on nightshift so he is in the bedroom all day sleeping. That is where i usually do my private prayers. Every other room the kids will run in and out of. I really need to commit to it either in the morning when dh is still up, or in the evening after the kids are in bed. Thank you for reminding me how important this is.
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hylabrook1
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I pray first thing in the morning, getting up an hour before I wake the children. Usually I am able to get 45 minutes or a little longer. I read through the Mass readings for the day, then say a Rosary. This routine prepares me to "face" the rest of my day, gives perspective to everything else. I have *perspective* in principle, but the practice is, of course, more difficult to attain without praying early in the day.
Nancy
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Helen
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I collected most of my prayer posts into one place.
I can't write much now, so I will try to come back to this later, but there are many different ways to pray. The way a married woman prays is different from the way a single woman prays. Fundamentally prayer is a conversation with God which should take place all day, at least this is the goal. One of my favorite quotes from St. Josemaria Escriva "An hour of study is an hour of prayer." Or from Bl Charles de Foucauld "Prayer is thinking thoughts of God but with love." (I forget exactly his words but we used it in a Mary Vitamin recently.)
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Ave Maria!
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Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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hylabrook1
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Graciefaith -
It IS sometimes hard to get enough quiet and privacy to pray. Here's what a friend of mine does: when she wants to pray privately, she sits in a particular rocking chair and turns her back to the room, facing the corner. That is the signal for her children to give her peace and quiet so that she can have a private conversation with God. I think her children do a pretty good job of finding something to do quietly, although I'm sure it's not always perfect. I do think it's a neat idea.
Peace,
Nancy
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Willa
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Jane,
I'm reading a book of Edith Stein's writings. She suggested devoting the first hour of every day, before the work day starts, to God. Obviously, since she was a Carmelite nun, her first hour of the day looked much different than mine does. However, I loved the idea of simply dedicating that first hour. No other plans, nothing to accomplish during that time frame....just being in God's presence. I try to get up a bit before the kids but even if they follow me out as they often do.... the little ones appear to have radar.  Still, that's God's plan for me for that hour -- good.
The kids don't really interrupt my time with God as much as my own plans, purposes, thoughts do.... so just taking that part of it out of the equation has been helpful, for me at this season of my life.
I also try to spend the last few minutes of the day examining my conscience and devoting the next day to God. When oldest ds was here during the summer he would say a Rosary with me while the little ones were falling asleep. I will miss that time in the day now that he has gone back.
And I usually get a couple of minutes to recollect, after lunch during the quiet part of the day. That's often when I read the mass readings or parts of the Divine Office. I can do that while preparing the night time meal, or nursing the toddler, or whatever -- there's usually some little lull I can use.
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AMDG
Willa
hsing boys ages 11, 14, almost 18 (+ 4 homeschool grads ages 20 to 27)
Take Up and Read
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Philothea
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I'm a morning pray-er, too. I use Magnificat magazine and just do their morning prayer with my own intentions added, then read the introduction to the Mass for that day. Since I began doing this each morning, I have been blessed with enormous graces to stop being a selfish mommy and give more to my family and God. I have become much more content, too.
Throughout the day, I talk to God, Mary and the Saints for help with little things that crop up. If I'm not too exhausted by nightfall, I'll do night prayer before I go to bed, but this is spotty.
Sometimes I pray the roasry in the car, but I'm pretty sure I do it wrong. No one ever taught me (I'm a recent convert) and I'm finding it difficult to learn it. I figure a slightly messed-up rosary is better than none at all, though.
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TracyQ
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I love my Magnificat as well. I try dedicate the day to God first thing, and give it to Him. I pray in the morning, and ask particular saints to pray for each of us (my dh, myself, and each of our children), then ask our Angels to pray for us, and to protect us throughout the day. Then I pray for the intentions of others (from email lists, this message board, etc.).
Then throughout the day, I try to *pray constantly* as directed in Scripture by praying Aspirations, and talking to Mary, asking her for her intercession, and praying for those who come to my heart when they come to my heart.
I'm also trying to commit certain prayers I love and need to memory such as St. Michael's Prayer, and the Anima Christi, etc. That way, I can just say them when I need to say them, and can *pray constantly* throughout the day.
I'd like to be more scheduled, and do things more routinely, but looking at what I typed, I do have a routine for prayer, it's just more matched with my vocation, and our family, rather than someone else's. 
I'm learning..............
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Blessings and Peace,
Tracy Q.
wife of Marty for 20 years, mom of 3 wonderful children (1 homeschool graduate, 1 12th grader, and a 9th grader),
homeschooling in 15th year in Buffalo, NY
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Helen
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Philothea wrote:
| Sometimes I pray the roasry in the car, but I'm pretty sure I do it wrong. No one ever taught me (I'm a recent convert) and I'm finding it difficult to learn it. I figure a slightly messed-up rosary is better than none at all, though. |
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Dear Philothea,
I would love to talk to you about the Rosary. It is a very good prayer for the car or when walking about. You are probably saying it correctly. Did you see John Paul II's on the Rosary? I took out the his instructions on how to pray the Rosary in this series of posts.
This site has a scriptural Rosary which can be a good way to learn (and continue) with the Rosary. The goal is to think about the life of Christ while saying the Hail Marys and the Our Fathers. There are many, many different ways of doing this. (Sometimes, I like to think about the mysteries from the point of view of St. Joseph.) Thinking about the life of Christ from the point of view of the Blessed Mother imparts an empathy to His life that only a mother could teach. It is a humble way of putting oneself aside and trying to take on the thoughts of another.
As the habit of the Rosary develops, it becomes easier to slip into some of your more favorite meditations. At first though, it is a good idea to read the scripture as much as possible and the meditations of saints.
Our Lady of Fatima asked for 15 minutes meditation on the Rosary. Also reading about Our Lady's apparitions in Fatima helped me very much to embrace the Rosary.
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Ave Maria!
Mom to 5 girls and 3 boys
Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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Elena
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I kind of do the Holiness for Housewife thing and just keep a running dialogue with God going all day. As the baby grows though, I hope to do more formal contemplative prayer - I need more of that!
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mumofsix
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Thanks for all your responses, and for the link to your blog, Helen: it has given me much food for thought.
I will make my own contribution to the discussion soon (I'm still pondering things) but I thought some of you might like to look at a couple of posts on my brother's blog about the Carthusian way of life, which is quintessentially about prayer. Tour of a Carthusian cell tells you about the life of a Carthusian monk, who only leaves his cell three times a day for communal prayer, and breviary - how long is long?traces the Carthusian breviary back through orthodox Jewish chant to the time of Jesus, who would have chanted something similar himself every morning- spine-tingling.
Any of your children doing a unit study on the middle ages might like to look at this: the Carthusian life hasn't changed at all since then!
Jane.
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Helen
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mumofsix wrote:
Thanks for all your responses, and for the link to your blog, Helen: it has given me much food for thought.
I will make my own contribution to the discussion soon (I'm still pondering things) but I thought some of you might like to look at a couple of posts on my brother's blog about the Carthusian way of life, which is quintessentially about prayer. Tour of a Carthusian cell tells you about the life of a Carthusian monk, who only leaves his cell three times a day for communal prayer, |
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Thank you Jane.
I just added your brother's blog to my bloglines. It looks beautiful. (I noticed that he is using beta blogger. I would love to know how it went when he switched. But that's another thread.)
I think most Third Order members are asked to pray Morning and Evening prayer from the breviary. Sometimes in family life, it is difficult to actually get to the book to say the prayers. In our rule(Franciscan Tertiaries of the Immaculate), as a subsitution, 12 our Fathers, 12 Hail Marys and 12 Glory replace the breviary. So, if I have a morning or evening when I just can't get to the book, I substitute these prayers. I like to focus on "Thy Will be done" when I use the substitution. In praying the breviary or using the substitution, I am ultimately doing these things to serve God.
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Ave Maria!
Mom to 5 girls and 3 boys
Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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mumofsix
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Thanks for all your responses.
"I'm not really a morning person ..." I think that tired old excuse will have to be shelved! I think for most of us with small children, the morning time before they wake up is likely to be the best if not only time for private prayer. I am going to get up half an hour earlier to do this.
I really liked Helen's ideas: I am going to start small, with her idea of reading and meditating on the Mass readings for the day, then making a Spiritual Communion. I might then say a novena prayer for any current urgent intention. (There usually is one!) We say the rosary as a family, so that is already covered. (I do feel that if Our Lady at Fatima specifically asked for the rosary, and not any other prayer, that it is important to begin with this. Fatima is a private revelation, so we are not bound to believe it, but the Church has authenticated it as a genuine apparation of Our Lady, so we would be a bit foolish to ignore it!)
Here is a quotation from the Cure d'Ars about Spiritual Communion:-
"A Spiritual Communion acts on the soul as blowing does on a cinder covered fire which was about to go out. Whenever you feel your love of God growing cold, quickly make a Spiritual Communion."
I did find the popular book, "A Mother's Rule of Life" by Holly Pierlot rather off-putting. Looking at the pictures of the Carthusian monastery made me feel rather envious. I can see the attraction of making a personal "Rule". And I do understand that some mothers benefit from being a member of a third order, etc. However, for most of us I suspect, just welcoming all the vicissitudes (and joys) of children is a better Rule than too complicated a prayer schedule which would involve sending them out to play, sending them to their rooms, etc. I like the way Helen prays a lot WITH her children, but with sensitivity to what they can cope with, guided by their behaviour. After all prayer is supposed to be a joyful thing, and not a penance.
I do find my children very keen to pray the rosary, etc. I have no trouble getting them to do this and behaving well, despite the fact that they are far from paragons generally. If only the rest of life ran this smoothly: it must be our consolation! I just need to get some more private prayer time in: thanks for all the inspiration.
Jane.
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stacykay
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Philothea wrote:
| Sometimes I pray the roasry in the car, but I'm pretty sure I do it wrong. No one ever taught me (I'm a recent convert) and I'm finding it difficult to learn it. I figure a slightly messed-up rosary is better than none at all, though. |
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I am not perfect at praying the Rosary without all my helps, and I almost always lose track, and add on more Hail Marys to make sure I have enough for each decade!  But, in the car, I have a Rosary tape, and we all say it together. I think I would get too distracted, otherwise. The other thing I have done, is have the oldest lead while I am driving, and he keeps track!
I have great intentions of praying in the morning, but I wind up doing so at night, with my little sheets and prayers, and then, I almost always fall asleep while saying them, and don't finish! So, I reverse the order of intentions, etc. each night to make sure I get them in. I really have to get a better system!
In a nutshell, I don't pray as much as I should. An area I need to work at improving!
God Bless,
Stacy in MI (also a convert- Easter Vigil 1983)
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Caroline
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Helen, your website is incredible. Thank you for sharing.
Could someone please tell me what the breviary is? I've never even heard of it.
I do get Magnificat, which has morning and evening prayers. Is that the same thing?
__________________
Devoted Wife to  and Mama to three beautiful boys and another little boy due in September, and two beautiful souls in heaven
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Helen
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Dear Caroline,
You are very kind, thank you. (I want to give the Lord and Our Lady the credit, but I'm not sure exactly how to make this idea come across.)
Morning Prayer and Evening Prayer are two of the important "hours" of the breviary. Breviary is the older word. Nowadays, this prayer is called the Liturgy of the Hours. Priests and religious are required (generally) to pray the breviary. Have you ever seen a priest or religous carrying a leather bound book with colored strings to mark the pages?
Check Jane's link above to Fr. Finegan's blog. I'm sure he'll give a very good explanation.
I'm not sure if Magnifcat prints the entire Morning and Evening prayer.
Does Magnifcat have three psalms and antiphons? a reading? responsory? Canticle of Zechariah? Intercessions? Our Father? and the Prayer for the day? Then it has all of morning prayer.
__________________
Ave Maria!
Mom to 5 girls and 3 boys
Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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momwise
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Magnificat has Morning, Evening and Night prayer, the pattern of which is based on the Liturgy of the Hours, with antiphons, Psalm, reading, intercessions, appropriate Canticle and closing prayers. They are not the actual Psalms or antiphons from the Breviary but correspond closely with the day's Mass reading or feast. Magnificat has an excellent daily "homily" and Mass readings also, plus a saint of the day. I loved it but wanted to get back to the Hours.
Families have another option than the 4-book set of Hours, and that is the Shorter Christian Prayer book, which contains all of the Morning, Evening and Night prayers with alternate antiphons and prayers for some feasts and for Advent and Lent, Christmas and Easter.
I found a great prayer site with so much about the Liturgy of the Hours!
__________________
Gwen...wife for 30 years, mom of 7, grandma of 3.....
"If you want equal justice for all and true freedom and lasting peace, then America, defend life." JPII
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Karen E.
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I'm late to this discussion (there's a tired old excuse from me ....) but just thought I'd throw in my two cents worth:
Currently, our prayer life looks like this: I pray in the shower, then have prayer with dh in the a.m. (Morning prayer, Liturgy of the Hours) before he leaves for work and if we're not interrupted by children; if I have more time after he leaves I shoot for the Office of Readings; morning prayer with kids at breakfast (daily offering, intercessions and a daily special intention), prayers "as needed" through the day ... ... and then bedtime prayers with kids (a decade of the Rosary, prayers of thanksgiving, intercessions, St. Michael prayer. I also try to do an examination of conscience before bed. My husband and I currently split a holy hour -- we take turns going each week.
I was also slightly put off by A Mother's Rule -- I can certainly see the attraction, too, but it just doesn't seem to work with my vocation ....
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God bless,
Karen E.
mom to three on earth, and several souls in God's care
Visit my blog, with its shockingly clever title, "Karen Edmisten."
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Personal prayer time.
