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homewith3
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| Posted: Aug 28 2008 at 10:02am | IP Logged
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I have been going to our local church for years now but have never made the decision to become Catholic. My DH is Catholic and we have chosen to raise our children in the church. Every year this time I "consider" going to the RCIA inquiry meetings but get all nervous and don't go... Well, it's that time of year again. The last inquiry meeting before classes is next Thursday night and I am feeling like I might finally make it there.....I guess I feel like it's something I should have done a long time ago but for whatever reason never did.
Is it normal to be nervous? I tend to be a very private person spirituallly and I know that will all change by doing this. This REALLY makes me nervous
I have tried to educate myself on the church, I have learned lots at Mass but I still feel so many ??????????????? Even though my DH is Catholic and was raised that way he wasn't raised deeply in the faith so he himself needs to relearn a lot. He is VERY encouraging to me though.
I guess I just need to know that I am doing this because I feel this is where GOD is leading me and not because I feel it's something I should do so I feel more a part of the church. KWIM?
So, if anyone has any great words of wisdom PLEASE...I am all ears. I would especially LOVE to hear from any that have gone through RCIA themselves.
I would also love to get an idea of what the inquiry part entails.....Do I need to educate myself more before then? What are the classes like?
Thank you
Debbie
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JodieLyn
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In my experience the whole point of going to RCIA is to have your questions answered. And you're not under any obligation by going. GO!! get your questions answered.. YOU are the one that should be doing the inquiring. And if you don't feel ready no one is going to make you become Catholic just because you showed up.
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Mary G
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Debbie --- what a wonderful post! And being nervous is a good sign -- it means you're taking all of this very seriously and you'll probably continue to do so. Being Catholic is not easy ... I'm a cradle Ctholic and ocassionally get nervous too  . One thing that has helped others I know is to choose a patron saint that you admire or relate to -- Maria Goretti, Mother Theresa, etc -- and pray for their intercessory help. And of course our Blessed Mother is always there to help -- pick one of your favorite titles for her (Mother of Good Counsel, Mother of Divine Grace, Queen of Angels, Star of the Sea, etc) or as patroness of something you hold dear (Our Lady of Guadalupe, Our Lady of Knock, Our Lady of Czestochowa).
A good RCIA program should allow you to ask any and all questions you might have .... and you should have questions. Dh ran RCIA last year and we've both been sponsors for candidates. Post here if you're not getting enough of an answer and maybe someone can steer you to the right place.
I will keep you in my prayers as you progress on your faith journey.
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sarahb
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Do you feel pressured to be especially public at your parish's RCIA? To discuss things you don't feel safe discussing with people you do not know well?
My son did RCIA and he felt an enrmous amount of pressure in one parish we were part of. They stressed having to ask Jesus into your heart and they did a whole lot of devotionals in the class. He was uncomfortable and so was I. I would have been more comfortable and so would he if they had done the traditional Catholic prayers which I love.
We moved and so he completed RCIA in a different parish. Though the academic prep wasnt nearly as good here I do think my son was more comfortable with the class. For some people, public free form devotions are a little much. Obviously I do not mean mass, but certain devotionals done as a group and etc. can be uncomfortable for very private people.
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SusanJ
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Dh was a convert and has been a sponsor and teacher in RCIA. We sponsored a very close friend two years ago and walked with him closely through his nerve-wracked year. If the program is a good one it should be set up as a discernment time. There are a few stages to the program that come with their own rites. I think at our parish there was one in late Fall after you'd been in the class a couple months and then something at the start of Lent and something just before Easter, maybe? I know there are RCIA teachers on the board who can clarify that but my point is only to say that the whole thing should progress in stages and you aren't signing your life away at any stage. You can back out at any point right up to the Vigil.
I also want to encourage you that God could be calling you through the church communtiy. It's not a frivolous thing to want to feel more a part of your church--becoming Catholic will achieve that in a very real and important way. Participating fully in the sacramental life is no small thing.
On a practical note--if your children aren't too young, do you think dh would go with you to some or all of the classes? If he is supportive but fuzzy on his old CCD knowledge it might be a great way for both of you to grow together in the faith.
God bless,
Susan
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Michaela
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Debbie, you have been in my thoughts since you posted To those who have Converted last year.
Three years ago, I went through RCIA. As Sarah shared, RCIA can vary from parish to parish.
My experience left much to be desired. It was geared toward the individuals who knew absolutely knew nothing about Christianity (different books in the Bible, timeline of those books, 10 Commandments). I wanted to discuss topics specific to the Catholic church, the issues that were preventing me from fully embracing all the teachings of the Church. These were teachings that I had to work through myself, reading and asking questions online.
Your experience will be different from anyone else, unless they went through RCIA at your parish.
Please come back here to ask questions if you aren't able to ask in class. I did it, and no one ever made me feel like I should have the answers or should find the answers myself.
On my way to class each week, I would pray for Our Lord's help.
May Our Lord make His desires for you clear.
I will keep you in my prayers, Debbie.
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Maddie
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When I converted, a priest gave me private instructions and then I was brought into the Church when he felt I was ready. Is there a priest you know who may be able to offer this to you?
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lapazfarm
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RCIA was for me one of the most wonderful experiences of my life!!! I loved it so, so, so much!
Just go. Leave your worries, doubts and expectations behind and just go, trusting that if God has called you then he will lead you down the path you need to follow to get to Him.
Remember, He wants you even more than you want Him.
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Vanna
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I loved RCIA! I loved the whole experience. They were very open to all of my questions, during class and in private...and boy did I have A LOT! LOL
I thought it was really a good thing to do. I know a couple of people who did the private instruction with a priest. It worked for them but I do feel they missed out on meeting a lot of really great people from the church. Part of RCIA is bringing you into the fellowship of the church. It's wonderful.
I am always nervous about entering new situations but I really think you would benefit greatly from taking the class...and as others have said you are under no obligation to join the church if you do not choose too and the end of the sessions.
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LucyP
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For me, with my personality, RCIA was a mixed blessing and I know that I did not make the best use of it at all. Partly I was hindered by needing to be at home with the children, and partly I came in late (about 6 weeks in), and never felt part of it at all. That said I think I only went 3 times. In person, I am very private especially spiritually and the few times I said something I (probably too sensitively) felt that people thought I was wacky - I mentioned indulgences, for example, in a positive way re the requirement for confession for many indulgences, and the priest more or less laughed at me.
Looking back, I wish I had jumped in and done more meetings, asked for more one on ones (I felt too awkward to bother Father) and really had taken all my questions and asked them. I am so aware of how little time the priests have and how unimportant my questions and thoughts and needs are compared to the elderly, sick, troubled etc. But I think I needed to ask for help more than I did.
If I had my time over, I would just jump in more. It's a wonderful opportunity and God will teach you so much.
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Leocea
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I converted to the Church in 2006, along with my husband and son. I understand your nervousness!
From what I have learned, the RCIA process differs from parish to parish. Our Leaders were very nice, but sometimes I knew more about a subject than they did! I was disturbed that they openly talked about their tubal ligation, and this was after a pregnant woman who was IN THE CLASS said that after this baby, she was getting her tubes tied. I let her borrow a book on NFP, and I'm not sure what happened with her later. We were expecting too, and had to be confirmed early due to the impending birth. :-) (I am not judging anyone who has had a tubal, but to talk about it in class, and not mention that if you are a practicing Catholic, this is mortally sinful, is ridiculous!!)
All in all, though, the class wasn't bad. My husband learned a lot, and we had a nice date once a week at RCIA class. I was just happy to join the Church, and that my dh was finally ready too!
We actually miss the class, so it couldn't have been too bad. I would say to read some apologetics, such as Surprised by the Truth, and Catholicism and Fundamentalism. Where is that in the Bible and Where (Why?) is that in Tradition were very good too. I let them keep my copies of these. :-)
I am excited for you! It was so awesome to receive our Savior in the Eucharist for the first time. I hope I never take it for granted!
In Christ,
Leocea
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TracyQ
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Debbie,
I am helping one of my friends, a homeschool mom from Tennessee as she goes through the process of entering the Catholic Church. I do agree with the others that RCIA is different for different parishes.
One person that has helped her tremendously to learn the truths of the Catholic Faith in depth (besides reading the Catechism, etc.) is Father John Corapi. His website is here: Father John Corapi's website He has a wonderful story, and God has used him in an incredible way to teach and challenge Catholics to learn their faith in depth. He's amazing!
I've lifted you in prayer, that the Lord will lead and guide you in the way He would have you go, and that you will find His peace as you trust His will for you on your journey. 
Tracy
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juststartn
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RCIA varies from parish to parish. My experience STUNK. Blunt, I know. I learned more in Inquiry than I did in the actual RCIA process. Other than the VERY happy ending, I felt it was, over all, a waste of 9mos (that's how long ours were--from June to the following March). I knew more going in than I did coming out, It certainly didn't help that all we did each week was JUST go over the readings we had JUST heard in Mass(and no offense, but the "discussions" were not anything the average person couldn't have pulled out of the readings and homily on their own, had they a brain and a couple of ears). No other meetings, no "how do we apply Church teaching to our lives?". Nothing. Didn't even learn about the sacraments. Yeah. I was NOT happy.
Be prepared to do your own study. Be prepared for a good program, too, they ARE out there.
Rachel
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amethyst
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I was very blessed by being the only one going through RCIA back in 2006 when I came into the Church after years of studying it.
As someone else said, I knew more about the Church sometimes than my RCIA guides, BUT, head knowledge and heart responses are different and after all my years of studying the Catholic Church inside and out I had to be humble and see that the head information had yet to travel completely to my heart...I stopped and started again with RCIA before I got that. 
I had a very feisty nun whom I clashed with for the first couple of months, and a lovely married couple who totally brought me to my knees at times with their humility - always praising me for my knowledge of Church doctrine and my love for Christ, but encouraging me to go deeper with my devotion and to allow my heart to open completely. That feisty nun became my hero over time!  She showed the love of Jesus so powerfully one night at one of our RCIA meetings when some Mormon boys came to the door of the convent (we had RCIA lessons at the Franciscan convent)...she listened so patiently, answered so lovingly, and corrected them with such total truth and mercy. I have never gotten over that night and the true measure of Christ I saw and hear in that little old woman.
I've gone wayyyy off topic.
I encourage you to stay with it...you may know more than them, and it may be hard to speak in front of others, BUT, Christ humbled Himself over and over again, and He is our measuring stick. The closer you stay with the RCIA lessons, the sooner you get to receive Jesus! THAT was the light for me - every day knowing I was one step closer to receiving Him.
My conversion story is on my blog and I think I explain a bit more of my stops and starts from memory. You will see the link on the sidebar
I am praying for you Debbie! Journeying into the Church is the most wonderful experience - savour it with every ounce of your being. Others are watching (I was always aware of that) and your commitment to obeying the ways of the Church and how it brings converts in will be a new way of showing your love for Christ and His Church.
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Nervous about RCIA...
