Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Philothea
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Posted: March 06 2007 at 8:00pm | IP Logged Quote Philothea

We have been trying for 8 months now to conceive a second child. We use NFP, I know my cycles, I know I am ovulating, we timed things perfectly and yet my period came again today. I am only 26, so my age is not the problem. I am growing tired of the emotional roller coaster and it seems that all of my IRL friends (not to mention you all) are pregnant or just had new babies.

I do not want to become bitter or envious, but I can feel it creeping in. Pray for me to be strong against the enemy and his snares, and to accept God's answer to this fervent prayer of ours for new life, no matter what it might be. Also pray for me to bear up under the humiliation of having people assume we are contracepting or not open to life. My son is almost three and I worry that people probably think we're just selfish and concerned about money.

This is also hard on my husband, who is almost 42 and worried about being too old to raise more kids ... I sometimes worry about this, too. We used NFP to avoid because I had a C-section with scarring issues and was scared of going through a pregnancy, plus we just liked the idea of 3 years between kids, especially since our first was a surprise (we found out we were pregnant the night we got back from our honeymoon). I regret this now ... I wish we'd been open all along. I feel like we're being punished for trying to control things.

Please pray for us.
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JennGM
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Posted: March 06 2007 at 8:48pm | IP Logged Quote JennGM

Prayers, my friend. I truly understand. I just wrote about my feelings in a similar vein.

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stefoodie
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Posted: March 06 2007 at 9:03pm | IP Logged Quote stefoodie

Praying, Jenn and Philothea.

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Philothea
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Posted: March 06 2007 at 9:03pm | IP Logged Quote Philothea

Jenn, that is exactly what I'm feeling. Thank you for sharing your post, it helps a little to know I'm not alone, but I am so sad at the same time to know I am not alone, if that makes sense, because it's awful to feel this way and I wouldn't wish it on an enemy, let alone a dear sister in the faith.   Heartbreak and hormones are not a good combination.

I will pray for you, too.
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kingvozzo
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Posted: March 06 2007 at 10:17pm | IP Logged Quote kingvozzo

Philothea, I know these feelings all too well, as we struggled mightily after my first was born (5 days before our first wedding anniversary) and lost 3 babies before our second came. The bitterness is hard to fight, but it is possible, and I will pray for you, and Jenn, to find the peace that you can accept God's will.

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teachingmom
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Posted: March 06 2007 at 10:22pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmom

Praying for you both.

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Chari
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 12:15am | IP Logged Quote Chari

Praying for all of you.

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MaryM
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 12:39am | IP Logged Quote MaryM

Praying for you both and all women who are currently struggling with this pain.
HUGS

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St. Ann
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 1:31am | IP Logged Quote St. Ann

Philothea, the first 2.5 years of our marraige were similar to what you are experiencing now. In addition to my own heartache came advice from friends to "relax and don't exagerate". Some friends were really hard on me, believing that they were a help. This "help" from friends only made me feel worse. So, what I want to say is...I know know know what you are going through now and I so feel for you. I so remember the tears...
About the age of your dh...please do not worry. My dh is now 49 and would still love to have another. Our dhs won't be out on the soccer field with our 18 year olds, but will have words of wisdom and experience that will be treasured just as much by our dc, if not more.
You are in my prayers.



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Paula in MN
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 2:04am | IP Logged Quote Paula in MN

I waited for 15 years before I had child number two. I had given up hope. I had given up thinking about ever having more children. I had stopped praying for more children. I accepted that this was the life God wanted for me. Two months later I was pregnant! Philothea, I'll be praying for you.

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SeaStar
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 7:04am | IP Logged Quote SeaStar

I have been down that road- I am praying for you

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Philothea
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 7:06am | IP Logged Quote Philothea

Thank you, ladies. I treasure your prayers and I know they will lift my spirit throughout today. I especially need prayers for my attitude -- it's hard for me to live humble and meek obedience when I'm so frustrated. I need lots of grace to do what I should be doing with a smile on my face this week.

God bless you all.
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msclavel
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 8:24am | IP Logged Quote msclavel

Many prayers for you dear.
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lilac hill
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 8:47am | IP Logged Quote lilac hill

Philothea,
As to the age of your husband, my dh was born when both my in laws were 42. They had also adopted when they were 40. Dh's oler sister is 18 years his senior. DH 's experience is that an older parent is attentive and relaxed. My dear fil was one of the people I looked at when I was dating dh. After all, he was a great role model for dh.
I loved him dearly.

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momwats8
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 9:21am | IP Logged Quote momwats8

I have nothing for you except a huge hug and many prayers!!!

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mary theresa
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 11:53am | IP Logged Quote mary theresa

God bless you! I'm praying for you!

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ladybugs
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 11:55am | IP Logged Quote ladybugs

Prayers coming, Philothea!!!

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KC in TX
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 1:57pm | IP Logged Quote KC in TX

Prayers coming your way. Your road is one I'm walking albeit at 10 years older.

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Ruth
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 2:37pm | IP Logged Quote Ruth

I'll be praying for all of you going through this pain

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Lisa R
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Posted: March 07 2007 at 4:10pm | IP Logged Quote Lisa R

Philothea wrote:
Also pray for me to bear up under the humiliation of having people assume we are contracepting or not open to life. My son is almost three and I worry that people probably think we're just selfish and concerned about money.


I think it is so incredibly sad that we have to be concerned with this kind of thing.    It only matters what Jesus thinks. Please don't give others opinions another thought. It only causes you more pain. I know.

I'm praying for you.

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