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momwats8
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| Posted: Dec 05 2006 at 11:41am | IP Logged
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Hi everyone - I just got back from my first ob appointment and there was no heartbeat. Looking at the ultrasound the baby was 12 weeks and 1 day. I really really need your prayers please!! I am soo sad and so is my family:crying: I will be having a D & C later in the week.
My question is what have you all done with the baby in this situation. I am going to tell the doc that I would like the baby but then what? Any help would be appreciated.
Hi everyone i put an update in a reply . You will find it on the second page.
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Mary- Wife to Mike and Mother to Austin(92), Mikey(95), R.J.(97), Benedict(98), Kolbe(00), Ignatius(02), Christian(03), Margaret(05),&4 angels in heaven
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Bridget
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| Posted: Dec 05 2006 at 11:52am | IP Logged
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Oh Mary, I'm so sorry! This is devastating.
What does the hospital do with the remains? They may treat it respectfully. St. Joe's here, does. Or is there a funeral home in your area that will help? There is a Catholic one here that bury the miscarried babies for very little money, maybe free. Your priest might know.
Sigh. My heart is very much with you.
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Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
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Lisbet
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| Posted: Dec 05 2006 at 11:53am | IP Logged
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I am so sorry. So very sorry. 
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Lisa, wife to Tony,
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Carole N.
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Mary, I am so sorry. I miscarried at 12 weeks. It was so very hard.
The hospital where we now live has a program called Raindrops that works with families. I am not certain if it operates through the Church or not (until April, it was a Catholic hospital). Perhaps there is an organization like this in your area.
I will pray for you. 
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Carole ... in Wales
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kingvozzo
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Mary, I'm so very, very sorry to hear this. I will pray for you all...
My latest miscarriage, at about 12 weeks, was the only one where I had identifiable remains. I tried to contact my pastor at the time (who was completely inaccessible). A visiting priest told me that we could bury the remains ourselves. We had small ceremony in our yard and planted a tree with our baby.
I have no idea now if this is in any way proper. There were many extremely questionable practices from my pastor and the visiting priest (they were in seminary together). I was not really in a position to search out a lot of information. I have heard of other programs like Carole and Bridget mentioned, but only since we buried our little one.
My prayers are with you.
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Noreen
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Ruth
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| Posted: Dec 05 2006 at 1:34pm | IP Logged
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I'm so sorry about this. I will pray for your intentions. God bless.
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Ruth
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kjohnson
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| Posted: Dec 05 2006 at 1:43pm | IP Logged
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I'm so very sorry, Mary. You and your family are in our prayers.
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Katherine
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Christine
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Mary, my heart goes out to you. You and your family will be in my prayers. Our local Catholic cemeteries have areas that are specifically set aside for the burial of miscarried and stillborn babies. They provide the plot for free (if the family cannot pay for it); however, the family is responsible for the headstone regardless. The area, at the cemetery, where our little one is buried is called, Holy Innocents. You may want to contact your local Catholic cemetery and ask if they do something similar.
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Christine
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Caroline
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| Posted: Dec 05 2006 at 3:33pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Mary, I'm so sorry.
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Devoted Wife to  and Mama to three beautiful boys and another little boy due in September, and two beautiful souls in heaven
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Sarah in SC
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I'm so very sorry for your loss.
I have three little angels buried in my back yard, with a statue of Our Lady watching over them. The other six I wasn't able to bury.
You and your family are in my prayers. I'm so, so sorry.
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ALmom
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Mary, I am so sorry and will pray. In our area there aren't any Catholic cemeteries but there is one local cemetery that donates a grave site for the burial of stillborn babies in a special section for babies(I don't know if they would consider the same at earlier stages but it is worth asking about). I would plan some sort of burial even if it had to be in your backyard where you and your family could build your own memorial with flowers, etc. This was a very healing process for us when I miscarried. Another option would be to talk to anywhere that has a pro-life memorial - perhaps your baby could be buried there right on church grounds!
Also you may want to ask for another ultrasound and various tests to confirm anything right before any d&c.
I have heard of at least one case (rare though it would be) where they just missed the heartbeat the first time. In any case our prayers are with you!
Janet
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Dawn
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Oh, Mary, I am so, so sorry. Your family is in our prayers.
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Dawn, mum to 3 boys
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ladybugs
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Prayers for you and your family.
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guitarnan
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Mary, I'm so sorry that you've had such sad news. You are in my prayers today (in fact I will offer up my terribly stressful day for you!).
Hugs,
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Courtney
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Our prayers are with you and your family, Mary.
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Courtney in Texas
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Lavenderfields
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My prayers are with you in this most difficult time.
God Bless
Robynn in Lancaster, CA
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Donna
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Dear Mary,
I am so sorry. We will be praying for you each new morning.
Many cemeteries have a section just for miscarried babies to be buried. Unfortunately, I didn't know this until after my D&C was complete, so we've decided to add our recent baby's name to Jacob's grave stone at the cemetery, as a memorial.
Also, my s-i-l miscarried at 5 weeks and buried the baby in her local Catholic cemetery, and there was no charge to the family.
Lots of  .
Peace to you and your family,
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Erin
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Mary
I am so so sad for you and your family We lost our baby at 18weeks (I was induced, not a d&c) we bought our baby home and buried her in our yard. Our local priest came and condtitionally baptised the baby and had a graveside service. Very very comforting. You are in my prayers.
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Erin
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momwats8
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Hi all - Sorry I have not responded before this. I have been reading all of your comforting words and I want to thank you all from the bottom of my heart.
Please contine to pray for me. I leave in an hour for my consultation with the doc and then I will be told the time for my D & C tomorrow. I am going to ask for another ultrasound for comfirmation even though I knew it before they told me as I never saw a heartbeat either nor did I see the baby move at all. I am also going to ask for an ultrasound picture.
It has been very hard for me as I still feel pregnant and am not bleeding or cramping. I am just having an emotional time right now. We have decided to name the baby Ambrose which is the name I wanted all along for a boy and tody he is the saint of the day. It seemed so right. We talked to our priest and he said the hospital is very humane and does not even do abortions. He said they will cremate the baby after allowig us a chance to see the baby if we so choose. He is going to be doing a small prayer service for us at our house - that is being arranged for us by a friend.
Again thanks for all of the prayers, advice, and sharing of your hearts. I will keep you all posted.
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Mary- Wife to Mike and Mother to Austin(92), Mikey(95), R.J.(97), Benedict(98), Kolbe(00), Ignatius(02), Christian(03), Margaret(05),&4 angels in heaven
http://www.momwats8.blogspot.com
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Mrs.K
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I am so very sorry for your loss. May Our Lady comfort you.
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Blessings,
Mrs.K
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4Real Forums : We Pray to the Lord
Topic: prayers and a question - Updated
