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SallyT Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 08 2007
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 4:34pm | IP Logged
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I'd like to ask your prayers for a friend of mine who lost her full-term baby last week to a placental abruption. My friend is 47 and the mother of nine, and this baby was like our whole parish's miracle baby. The mother thought she'd had a miscarriage early on -- the doctors now think it was a small abruption which went undiagnosed -- but the baby survived until the middle of last week, just a week or so before her due date. They had thought that they were out of the woods completely with regard to complications, and the baby's death came as an utterly unexpected shock.
The funeral is Wednesday, and the baby's name is Dominica Marie. On a very minor side note, two friends and I are cantoring the Mass, and it would probably be good if we weren't crying too hard to sing.
Thanks so much. I know the family will be so grateful to be upheld in your prayers.
__________________ Castle in the Sea
Abandon Hopefully
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stefoodie Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 17 2005 Location: Ohio
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 5:36pm | IP Logged
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This is so sad. We are praying for your friend and her family.
__________________ stef
mom to five
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SeaStar Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 16 2006
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 6:11pm | IP Logged
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Praying
__________________ Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
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Chris V Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 03 2009 Location: Washington
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 6:37pm | IP Logged
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Oh my goodness, Sally.
How horribly sad. I will surely be praying for the dear family, and for you, her dear friend.
__________________ Chris
Happy Wife with my Happy Life
Mama to My Five Girls ('04~'07~'09~'11~'11)
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jdostalik Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 15 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 6:39pm | IP Logged
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Sally,
I will be praying for this dear mom. I just can't imagine.
__________________ God Bless,
Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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Elena Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 13 2006 Location: Ohio
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 7:08pm | IP Logged
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That's very sad. Haven't lost a full term baby but I lost one at 23 weeks, so I can only imagine how much more difficult that would be.
My recommendation to you as a cantor would be to stay in the sanctuary with the priest until it is time for you to come out and when you are up to sing keep your eyes on the back of the church. Do not make direct eye contact with any of the mourners. If you keep your eyes focused on the very last pew it will look as if you are looking at someone, but you won't be and you'll be able to hold it together better. Remember to breathe deeply too. You can really help them out during this important time and I wish you the best.
__________________ Elena
Wife to Peter, mom of many!
My Domestic Church
One Day at a Time
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SallyT Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 08 2007
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 8:14pm | IP Logged
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Thanks for the tips, Elena. Fortunately our cantors/choir are seated off to one side and don't sing from the front of the church, so we'll be looking at the backs of people's heads, mostly. And we can sing to Jesus in the tabernacle and on the altar, which is always a good thing. As long as we can make the sound come out, we can have tears pouring down our faces and no one will notice.
I've sung for funerals before, but never one with quite this level of personal feeling.
Sally
__________________ Castle in the Sea
Abandon Hopefully
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guitarnan Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Maryland
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 8:16pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Sally, this is so sad. I will pray for everyone involved.
Making the sound come out can be tough. I'm praying for you and the other cantors. (BTDT.)
__________________ Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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rose gardens Forum Pro
Joined: Feb 23 2006 Location: Minnesota
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 8:59pm | IP Logged
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Oh, my heart just breaks for your friend!
Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee...
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Waverley Forum Pro
Joined: Nov 12 2006 Location: Minnesota
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 9:19pm | IP Logged
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I will certainly keep you, your friend, and all their children in my prayers.
__________________ Waverley
wife to Dh for 19 years, dd (16), dd (11), dd (8), ds (6), dd (4), dd (9-13-1996)
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ladybugs Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: California
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Posted: March 15 2010 at 10:33pm | IP Logged
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Will pray for you all.....I am so sorry.
__________________ Love and God Bless,
Maria P
My etsy store - all proceeds go to help my fencing daughters!
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SuzanneG Forum Moderator
Joined: June 17 2006 Location: Idaho
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Posted: March 16 2010 at 1:46am | IP Logged
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Praying, Sally...
__________________ Suzanne in ID
Wife to Pete
Mom of 7 (Girls - 14, 12, 11, 9, 7 and Boys - 4, 1)
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St. Ann Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 20 2006 Location: Germany
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Posted: March 16 2010 at 2:51am | IP Logged
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Sally, I am so sorry . I will pray for this mother especially and her family.
__________________ Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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Carole N. Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 28 2006 Location: Wales
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Posted: March 16 2010 at 3:04am | IP Logged
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Praying for your friend and her family, Sally. Also praying for you especially during the funeral.
__________________ Carole ... in Wales
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Mackfam Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: Alabama
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Posted: March 17 2010 at 6:17pm | IP Logged
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This is a painful Cross. I will definitely pray for your friend, SallyT. May God's generous mercy and grace sustain them during this time of extreme pain.
__________________ Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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SallyT Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 08 2007
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Posted: March 18 2010 at 11:05pm | IP Logged
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Thank you all so much for your prayers. The funeral and burial were beautiful -- and I don't say that lightly. I saw Father today, and we were comparing notes on moments of the whole thing which had struck us as especially just . . . well, "ravishing" is the word that comes to my mind, in their sadness but also their beauty and hopefulness and the awareness of God's ever-present hand.
This is an amazing family -- among their nine living children, they have a 23-year-old daughter who is severely developmentally impaired, and my friend was saying that just as she hadn't "known" how to be the mother of a special-needs child, but had just done it, so she would be given the way to "just do" this, too.
I blogged a little yesterday about the funeral and the graveside service, so I won't say much more about it all here. But I know that the family are beyond grateful for the prayers of people who don't even know them -- they know themselves to be sustained and borne up on all your prayers, and I thank you on their behalf for your kind hearts.
Sally
__________________ Castle in the Sea
Abandon Hopefully
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