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Cay Gibson
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I saw Terri Irwin (wife of Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin) on television the other night...or perhaps I read it somewheres...where she said that she doubted she would ever marry again. I can't remember her exact words but she felt she and Steve were soulmates and there is no one else in the world for her.
If your spouse passes before you (  sorry it's such a depressing subject ) would you remarry?
I know some of you have been widowed and remarried. Can you share with us your thoughts and experience?
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Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
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Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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doris
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I strongly believe in not having an opinion! Whatever God wills.
If *I* died while the children were still small, I would really want dh to find a new wife, and quick!!
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Home educating in London, UK with dd (2000) ds (2002), dd (2004), ds (2008) and dd (2011).
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lapazfarm
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I don't think that is something one can really know unless it happens. I imagine it would be life-changing to say the least, so who knows what I would or would not do, because I would not be the same person I am now.
But, I cannot imagine wanting anyone else, nor anyone else putting up with me! 
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Carole N.
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I am with you Theresa! I just don't think there are too many men out there that could deal with me and our family. I think that my dh is an extra special guy--not that there aren't other extra special guys out there. But when the family is the family you helped to create, it is a bit different stepping into someone else's shoes, kwim?
Besides, I really love my dh!  But as Elizabeth said, you never know God's will.
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Dawnie
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I'd remarry, but on several conditions 
1. The guy would have to be a faithful Catholic
2. He'd have to love my kids like they were his own.
Before my uncle re-married, he dated *quite* a few women. He actually proposed to one woman who had children, but didn't want anything to do with her kids.  Said, "I've *raised* MY kids. Don't want to raise someone ELSE's kids." Needless to say, that engagement did not end with a wedding. But I wouldn't even waste my time w/ a guy who had that kind of attitude.
But I can't imagine even having time to date if dh passes away anytime soon!
Dawn
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stefoodie
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Yes, Cay, this *is* a depressing topic.
Right now, the answer is no, can't imagine remarrying. I met a lot of guys before hubby and I have not a single guy that could hold a candle to him; even now that we've married 17 years I still think he's the ideal (of course, ideal for ME).
BUT, I do believe only God knows what His plans are for us. I've read of people who never planned on remarrying but ended up finding someone. Hopefully I won't have to find out since I want hubby and me to live blissfully for 50+ more years at least, together....
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JodieLyn
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I wouldn't say either way.. too many variables.. plus I would likely go with more of a courting than a dating model.. combine that with choosing to follow Church teachings and 7 kids and well..
basically I wouldn't want to pigeon hole myself into either thought.
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mary
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both my sister and sister in law died leaving small children. neither of my bils have remarried. the men are lonely, over worked, stressed and those kids need a mama. so, yes, i would remarry and i hope my dh would as well.
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MacBeth
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After the kids are grown, and not before....yes.
Not that I have anyone in mind .
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mellyrose
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I don't think so, but who knows what God would have in store for me? I wouldn't close my mind to it, but I wouldn't go out searching either.
I waited till I was 29 to marry, and I can honestly say that I hadn't met a man before that whom I would have considered marrying. I truly feel that God put my DH into my life (and vice versa) at just the right moment.
And, since I believe that, I can't discount that God might decide to put someone else into my life if I am widowed.
But, yuck, not something I really want to think about!
Melanie
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RenB
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This specific topic has come up lately when my husband inquired into my opinion about this. I haven't posted on the prayer list yet, but ladies, when one is staring a life and death situation in the face, it's a question that can arise.
Last week, my husband left his long standing career for a permanent sick leave as he rests and awaits a lung transplant (double), likely at the end of this year, from the damage inflicted over time by a very rare lung disease. We have no idea where this operation will take place or when, though we are told to be available when the time comes to travel anywhere in North America (his company has provided incredible benefits to assist us when the need arises). My husband is obviously thinking of the future should this tranplant not solve his deteriorating lung capacity (now hovering around 38%). He also has cardio issues from it, also complicating matters with his health.
He says he's concerned about our younger children,as well as the possibility of splitting the family up should I meet someone not able to be a "bonding type of family guy", holding dear a prolife attitude on children being blessings, and just thinking of possible painful issues which could develop in the process for me (being protective more than anything). If it were God's will for me to meet another, he would be fine with it, though the emotions are high on the topic in general, as can be expected.
My faith is everything to me, everything! This complicates matters tremendously, offering many parameters towards a future relationship.
Would I remarry? How could I say for sure? I am a mother to many, a grandmother to several already, and we have four others still at home to raise (ages 15,14,9,8). For me, I hold an incredible plethora of memories I hold dear to my heart since marrying my highschool sweetheart, I would wish to uphold in a certain way. Another man would definitely be up to God's plan for me in my life and the thought at this time doesn't sit right to me...just because.
A woman I once knew was widowed at a young age (forties) and couldn't take her wedding ring off, ever, after the death of her spouse. She said she couldn't imagine working hard towards her own salvation and someday get to heaven with two spouses...smile. Does one really know what frame of mind she will be in should she face the death of a spouse? I don't think so.
My sister lost her spouse three years ago from esophagal cancer within seven weeks, start to finish, and her own children are grown and live out of state. Although she has a career where she must travel often, loneliness does become a factor, companionship if you will. Although for her, she would remarry in a heartbeat should the right man come along, she hesitates greatly for many reasons as well.
Many parishes up here offer "Widow support groups", where women join together to socialize and grieve/celebrate as only they can understand amongst one another. I think certainly they offer much, a great support to its members.
My husband has traveled vast amounts with his work over the years, since we began to court. Perhaps God was planning ahead, perhaps not, but I've been used to many days/nights/weeks without him, something which has never really bothered me. Perhaps just as my sister, we both experienced this, therefore, we aren't likely to "seek" anytime quickly should (for me) the thought arise.
"Jesus, I trust in Thee"
Just my own heartfelt two cents this day.
Blessings;
Renee
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Rachel May
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I think about it because of Bill's job. I think about where we would live and what I would do, homeschool still, get a job, go back to school? And yes, I think I would remarry if God sent the right guy. The Bible says young widows should remarry doesn't it? Well, I consider under about 80 young.
ETA: Renee, we must have been cross posting. You've given me even more to think about. I'll be praying for you and your husband.
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humanaevitae
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My Dh knows he has 6m after I die before he HAS TO start looking- probably off Catholic dating sites online. This house NEEDS a mother to keep it all together!
I honestly can't see myself getting married again as a good man just seems much harder to find. We have enough life insurance that I could move closer to a Catholic homeschooling community which could help support me emotionally.
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Paula in MN
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I don't know what God has in store for me, so I don't want to say yes or know.
I can tell you that my mother is on husband number five. She.is.a.widow.
I have a hard time understanding how 5 oh-so-very-different men have ALL wanted to be married to her!!!!!
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Cay Gibson
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RenB wrote:
"Jesus, I trust in Thee"
Just my own heartfelt two cents this day.
Blessings;
Renee
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Renee,
Thank you for sharing this thoughful post with all of us. YOu and your dh will be in my prayers.
Since this tragedy in our hs circle this past month, this has been on my thoughts lately. I know there isn't a definitive answer any of us can give right now. I was just wondering if anyone was adamant about never remarrying and why, or have they been through the experience and changed their minds after time past.
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Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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alicegunther
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RenB wrote:
This specific topic has come up lately when my husband inquired into my opinion about this. I haven't posted on the prayer list yet, but ladies, when one is staring a life and death situation in the face, it's a question that can arise.
Last week, my husband left his long standing career for a permanent sick leave as he rests and awaits a lung transplant (double), likely at the end of this year, from the damage inflicted over time by a very rare lung disease. |
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Dearest Renee, I am praying for you and your dear husband as you undergo this ordeal.
St. Joseph, pray for us!
Our Lady of Perpetual Help, pray for us!
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Love, Alice
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Chari
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Renee,
I will be praying for you. Have you posted in the prayer requests for your situation? Some people might miss it on this thread......and you will get more prayers!
Also, I have an email group where our focus is prayers for our husbands. We have a monthly novena, and other prayer opportunities. PM me if you would like to join us. We love to pray for each other.
God bless you, and your sister!
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chicken lady
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Renee I am praying for you and your dh.
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aussieannie
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I have thought on these things in the past and my strong impression would be 'no' - my husband is much older than me too.
I don't know what all the factors are in my mind except to say that my mum must be a strong, sub-conscience influence - her mother, herself and her sisters have had one lifetime partners only.
My sister and I went into our marriages with that in mind (therefore dictating the way we lived before marriage) - my mother is now widowed, almost 7 years - she would never get married again, it is a certain as death and taxes!
Still, no one knows for sure what they would do if the occasion arose - I would like to think I could be open to God's will despite my 'natural feelings' - trouble is my feelings can be pretty strong! - but more than that, I just hope my husband lives up to the longevity genes in his family!
Renee, I will remember your dh in my prayers!
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Mary G
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OK, I've been there. My first dh died 4 days after his 31st bday; Joe was 3 and Cate was 11 months. I waited 5 years and then decided to jump start my life again -- praying the whole time that I would do God's will and wherever that would lead ...
God led me to Raleigh where I met and married Rick and we had 3 more children together.
This topic is so amazingly individual -- how many years were the Croc Hunter and his wife married? How old are the kids?
For me, it was a share matter of trusting in God's providence and allowing Him to lead me where He willed....
But I know some folks who never remarry or remarry too soon....
Marriage (or remarriage) is never easy but as long as God is "along for the ride" it's amazing how well things can work....
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MaryG
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Would You Re-Marry?
