4Real Forums: practicing patience and kindness in fam

Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.

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amiefriedl
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Joined: Feb 15 2005
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Posted: June 12 2006 at 6:15pm \| IP Logged

How do you practice patience and kindness in your family?

My ds8 and dd4 are almost one another's exclusive playmates. Our homeschool group is fairly spread out (there are no boys in it my son's age anyhow) so they see a LOT of each other.

I ask you all about this because they have been fairly mean to each other a lot lately. I know this is normal, but I want to strive for better.

It is funny too, because tonight as a kind of joke I offered my children an ice cream from the truck that drives around the neighborhood if they were patient and kind to one another for a week. My daughter melted down in tears.

Isn't it possible? My kids don't think so. But I think it really is essential for this to be a sincere goal.

There are times when I think my daughter is mean for recreation and that is why she became sooo overwhelmed at the thought of being nice to her brother for a whole week.

We say 3 HM every morning for patience and kindness with our morning prayers. I think uping the ante to a decade (or two or three) of the rosary in the am and pm should be more like it.

What else should we try??

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In Christ the King through Mary our Mother,
Amie
Blessed with an awesome hubby and Mom of ds10, dd7, dd3 and dd 10months.

LisaD
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Joined: Dec 27 2005
Location: California
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Posted: June 12 2006 at 6:43pm \| IP Logged

Oh, I am waiting for some replies to this one! The bickering is driving me batty

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~Lisa
Mama to dd(99), ds(01), ds(03) and ds(06)

Karen E.
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Posted: June 12 2006 at 8:06pm \| IP Logged

Oh, it's hard -- I think they require so much *constant* modeling at these young ages ... taking them by the hand, walking them through the behaviors, getting them to see how they feel when meanness happens to them, and then offering an alternative way of reacting, having them do a "do-over" (say or do the thing again, but nicely this time), and apologizing.

Then, praising a *lot* when you catch them doing it all well.

It's exhausting.

But I do think that's what it takes. My older ones are doing pretty well these days -- I do see fruits from all the constant teaching of earlier years, if that helps!

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God bless,
Karen E.
mom to three on earth, and several souls in God's care
Visit my blog, with its shockingly clever title, "Karen Edmisten."

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