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mommy4ever Forum All-Star
Joined: April 08 2011 Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline Posts: 596
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Posted: April 20 2012 at 11:15am | IP Logged
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I've had much time to reflect in the last year, as I have been on a bit of a faith journey.
We are a family of 6. I want another immensely, and trying to find peace with the fact it isn't likely, but I do pray that it happens.
Now, I have been gaining comfort in my life overall. I have found that I don't want a bigger house, I'd be content with a smaller one that what we are in now. I used to think we were poor. That we can't provide everything the kids need. But I have come to realize that we don't need to travel, have new cars, have the best of the best.
I don't really even want to travel. We have been lucky and opportunities for the kids to travel have arisen. DS was taken to Disneyland with his grandparents. DD15 recently took a 2 week trip out of the country with her best friend with minimal cost to us. While she enjoyed the trip, she found she loves our cooler weather in compared to the tropical weather she was in, so the desire of travel is gone now for her.
I am content with shopping used clothing stores, in fact i prefer it there is far more variety. My girls are enjoying it as well.
I am content with my body as it is now. I am working on fitness, but I'm no longer hiding behind baggy things, for the first time in 5 years, i wore a dress.
I am not so anxious about us earning more money, just working at paying off debt and staying debt free once we are.
I'm achieving these things, but how do I get the family to get to that point too? To quit comparing to what others have? To yearn for what they don't have. To be content and grateful how what we do have.
We have so much to be grateful for. i want that for them too.
__________________ Mom to 4,
1 graduated June 2012
1 in Catholic school
2 homeschooled(one considering art school!)
ardently praying for a new addition to our family.
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SeaStar Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 16 2006
Online Status: Offline Posts: 9068
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Posted: April 20 2012 at 11:32am | IP Logged
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What a wonderful journey, Mommy4ever.
With shops everywhere, TV, catalogs, etc it is very hard to turn off materialism and be content.
I heard a funny saying the other day that you spend the first 40 years of your life accumulating things and the next 40 trying to get rid of it all.
The older I get, I find the less I want. But I think that is a very hard concept for children. They don't see it as: "I'm tired of taking care of all this stuff"; they only see the neat things that others have that they *think* they'd like. They don't have the experience to know that the gold fish has to be fed every single day, the bike has to be put in the garage every night
or that there will always be another video game that is newer and better.
Anyway.... I find that limiting TV time and keeping toy catalogs, etc under control help stop the "I wants". Also, I try not to take my kids into Walmart, Target, etc if I don't have to, since that always starts a round of wanting this or that.
And at night we go through and say all the things we are thankful for that day during our prayer time. That helps us become more aware of all the blessings we have.
__________________ Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
Online Status: Offline Posts: 12234
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Posted: April 20 2012 at 11:36am | IP Logged
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You say this is a recent change for you. So you've had some time of modeling the opposite to them. It won't change easily. But you can start modeling the way you want to be now. You might even talk to everyone about it and maybe challenge them to try it for 2 months (long enough they say to create a new habit). Then you can catch each other not being content and work together to change the statement from one of discontent to one of content.
I love this quote..
"The greater part of our happiness or misery depends on our disposition, and not our circumstances."
- Martha Washington
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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