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Chari
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What is your typical dinner like?
Do you serve all of the family, or, do you set it up like a buffet, to self-serve?
Does everyone get to talk? Or, are kids only seen and not heard? (yeah, right....  )
Do you always eat as a family?
our papa is almost never home for dinner 
I have found my tired self serving buffet-style more and more.... 
do you think that is okay?
for tonight......we are having our fifth picnic dinner in as many nights......in front of historical videos
just been wondering.......hope you will share....
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Chari...Take Up & Read
Dh Marty 27yrs...3 lovely maidens: Anne 24, Sarah 20 & Maddelyn 17 and 3 chivalrous sons: Matthew 22, Garrett 16 & Malachy 11
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Loren
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We usually all eat together and serve from the pots set on the table. Whoever is sitting closest to a particular pot may serve from that pot, or sometimes dh and I serve everything.
I have found that if I leave the pots on the stove and serve from there that dh and I are less likely to go back for seconds or to sit and pick extras from the serving dishes. The kids eat everything in sight, but they're growing boys. They don't need growing parents.
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teachingmom
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We eat together just about every night. On Wednesdays the girls and I get fast food after choir practice and before Holy Hour. Dh joins us at church just in time for Holy Hour and either eats on the road or at home afterwards.
The other nights, I typically make everyone a plate and set it on the table. Things like vegetables, salad and bread are often placed in a bowl (or basket for bread) for serving at the table.
For awhile there, we were depending on convenience meals and pizza too often. When I realized that our budget could not continue like that, I started to be better about actually cooking a healthy meal most days of the week.
Everyone talks--often too loudly and with much too much interrupting, I'm afraid. (We are also working on not talking with mouths full of food, with only partial success.  ) My dh recently re-instituted something he calls "2 things". At some point during the meal, we all go around sharing 2 things from our day, either from our schooling or the girls' playing and free time.
Towards the end of the meal, when the girls have to finish their food so we can all get up, dh and I tend to talk more to one another, without including the kids so much. They listen and are welcome to say something, but often it is just the two of us talking about his day at work or current events.
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~Irene (Mom to 6 girls, ages 7-19)
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Erica Sanchez
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Every meal, every day (practically) eaten together at the table (or around the island in the kitchen or in the backyard picnic style). Usually it is all food on the table, because I think I am just too lazy to be getting up and down. Dh is gone now during the week and this is what I miss the most!  It is a lot more work to do every meal by myself, but these timeouts during our day are priceless. It seems even if we're having a bad day, it is near impossible to not smile and be happy looking at all the children around the table. We used to occassionally feed the kids first and put them to bed and then have Chinese or something else yummy for an in-home date night...fun! Aside from attending Mass all together from the time all are newborns, these meal times are the most important thing we do!
I don't mean to sound like I actually "cook" every meal. I am not a great cook, but it's usually an attempt at something healthy. Tonight, though, we had pizza
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Have a beautiful and fun day!
Erica in San Diego
(dh)Cash, Emily, Grace, Nicholas, Isabella, Annie, Luke, Max, Peter, 2 little souls ++, and sweet Rose who is legally ours!
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Leonie
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Oh dear, our mealtimess are a lot more haphazard.
Some are served at the table. Some are eaten picnic style while we watch a video. 
Some are finger food dinners while we play a game or read aloud.
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Leonie in Sydney
Living Without School
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lilac hill
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I have the greatest difficulty when DH is working through dinner. Meal planning on "go to the store"/shopping day has reduced some of the haphazard dinners on those nights.
Some of our evenings are busy so we can have dinner anywhere from 4:00-6:00. One the early nights we have 2 small dinners or I just split the dinner.
On the nights Dh gets home around 9:30, the girls have dessert with DH.(I on the other hand am on my way to dreamland )
Serving from the pots on the stove with the salad bowl on the table does seem to help with extra dishes on quicker nights.
Growing up we had a quieter table with each of us telling something we learned that day.
My house's "tell us something you did not know this morning" discussions usually turn into acted out song and dance numbers. Initially we added this to our routine because dd#2 was so quiet. We wanted her just to speak in an uninterrupted manner. And since there are a number of years between our talkative dd#1 and at that time young dd#3, we wanted dd#3 to have her chance.
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Viv
Wife to Rick (7/83), Mom to dd#1(6/87), dd#2(1/90), and dd#3(6/94) in central PA.
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Kelly
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Chaos! But at least it's Togetherness Chaos.
For a long time, I had problems getting the hot food on plates and to the table. By the time I finished serving up and sat down, food was getting cold. If we said the blessing beforehand, and I let everyone else start before I got everything served, then I was invariably just sitting down to eat when they were all finishing! Like Chari, I got tired of buffet style.
I guess I'm just a slow learner, but we finally figured out A Method. We divided the group into two teams and each night, we rotate "Set Up" and "Clean Up". The "Set Up" crew is also the Pour The Drinks Crew AND the Serving Crew. It has helped incredibly.
We, too, are working on manners, alas. Everyone wants to talk at once, and the 3 year old wants to talk all the time  ! We're TRYING (not always successfully) to shoot for the same dinner hour each night, roughly.
I always liked the "Cheaper By the Dozens" Gilbreth Family's policy of dinner conversation. They'd go around the table and each person got to tell something about their day, unless it was deemed to be "Not of General Interest". Of course, my children just shout "Not of General Interest" to each other for everything...
Oh well, it's a works in progress!
Kelly in FL
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5athome
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We usually all eat together (although we are outgrowing our tiny dining room. We have a dinner bell to get everyone to the table without me going hoarse from yelling. Whoever rings the dinner bell is also allowed to do the prayer before we eat (you would be shocked how "exciting" they think the bell ringing job is).
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Jenny
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We leave the pots on the stove & serve from there. We all eat together at the table unless dinner is late b/c dad worked late then we eat around the bar. We talk, sometimes too much!
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Jenny
Chris' wife and momma of 7. My blog: The Littlest Way--Bible Journaling, Inspiring Bible Quotes, Daily Affirmations, Prayer Journaling & photography
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ALmom
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We all eat dinner together (breakfast and lunch are more haphazard) every night (oldest sometimes has to reheat her plate on orchestra night because we didn't get dinner cooked in time - but then we all sit around for a night snack while she eats) and we chat.
The dc set the table, all the littles know they have to be seated to be served and we serve out of pots on the table. We all talk at once (also working on not interrupting) and the noise can get deafening.
Dh devised a devious plan to encourage asking to be excused - so we don't have total chaos. It is also a subtle encouragement to stay and chat at the table. If we have desert then anyone who left the table without asking misses out. We will excuse littles and call them back for desert if they ask. Everyone asks to be excused now - so we know where they are and what they are up to even if we continue chatting with older dc. Also, when dc ask to be excused - or if they are getting wild, dh will have them take things from the table one at a time. By the time everyone is done, the table is cleared, food is put away and dishes are at least in the sink while things have reigned a bit more calm than before. If dc are particularly calm or we know it has been a prolonged discussion that we want to continue - then we just excuse them without the clearing and do it ourselves. Even 3 yo can carry bottle of dressing and put it in the refrig. - or place a fork/spoon in the sink.
Janet
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Elizabeth
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We eat as a family every night--but sometimes different members are missing due to sports conflicts. As much as possible, I try to move the dinner hour around within the 5-7 timeframe to accomodate the most people. We set the table and I serve in serving dishes on the table. Usually I put all the serving dishes on the table and then we say grace. Dh and I serve from opposite ends, passing plates getting them filled for the littles and then passing serving dishes to the bigger ones. Conversation just takes its natural course. There's way too much adolescent boy humor, much to my chagrin and I'm trying to train it out of my dh . We say a blessing after meals and then I take the little ones upstairs. The three big boys are in charge of getting the kitchen clean.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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LisaD
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I eat with the children, and then the children sit at the table with dh when he gets home from work later. I have found that the kids eat better if I have all the serving dishes on the table. We have also been eating by candlelight since Christmas, when my father gave us some beautiful wood candlesticks that he made. There are three, so each of the bigger kids get to blow out one candle after dinner. I do wish that dh was home in time to eat with us regularly, but he usually isn't home until 7:30, and that is just too late for the kids to wait to eat. Often, they will have dessert sitting at the table with dh, while he eats his dinner, and I get started on kitchen clean-up. Lately, dd has been reading a chapter of The Boxcar Children aloud to dh and her brothers while sitting at the table keeping dh company while he has dinner.
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~Lisa
Mama to dd(99), ds(01), ds(03) and ds(06)
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guitarnan
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We eat LATE (8:00!) so we can all eat together. My husband never gets home early unless he is ill. I like a nice table (placemats and real plates) but we serve off the stove, from pans, unless I've baked a lasagne or something like that. This is mostly due to the fact that my serving pieces can't go in the dishwasher.
When my husband is away, sometimes I let the kids eat by themselves in front of the TV (at the school table) so I can get in a few minutes of quasi-alone time. If my husband has to work really, really late, I'll try to at least sit with him while he eats...eating alone is so dull. (All military spouses who've survived a "pre-kid" deployment know how dull it is!)
We talk a lot at dinnertime. We all enjoy sharing our day...generally all at once...
We fell into the "eat late" habit while living in Italy, and it's really worked for us. (We all like to stay up late and sleep in...poor dh has to get up early!)
This wouldn't work if I had younger children, and it may not work when we move to Maryland, but we may end up eating even later if my husband's commute is as bad as I think it will be. One of the many blessings of homeschooling for my family has been increased "Dad time" because we can adjust our schedules and travel plans to match my husband's duties. (This was critical when he was standing battle watches.) We've grown so much closer as a family because we spend more time together.
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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kristina
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Chari wrote:
What is your typical dinner like?
Do you serve all of the family, or, do you set it up like a buffet, to self-serve?
Does everyone get to talk? Or, are kids only seen and not heard? (yeah, right.... )
Do you always eat as a family?
our papa is almost never home for dinner
I have found my tired self serving buffet-style more and more....
do you think that is okay?
for tonight......we are having our fifth picnic dinner in as many nights......in front of historical videos
just been wondering.......hope you will share.... |
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Chari,
If my husband weren't home, I would probably do the same thing! In fact, as a family, our dinner habits have evolved into something civilized since our first child was born. We used to eat dinner in front of the tv. That habit was promptly dropped when our eldest child was three, and he said "how about Frazier?" as the program choice with dinner. How sad is that?!
I am thankful to admit that tv is more for specific programs (usually educational and much more selective!) now as opposed to being drawn into whatever is on and is not included in our dinner routine. All seven of us sit at the table and dine on whatever my husband or myself or most often the both of us have prepared. We try to eat before six or bedtimes get pushed back. My husband usually brings the cookware to the table and from which we are served. We say grace and try to encourage the children to ask to be excused when they are finished. Conversation often is lively. "Children seen and not heard" . What's that like???
Our issues are more about what gets eaten as opposed to how the meal is eaten. I grew up with milk and bread on the table at every meal and my mom made normal food like pork chops and chicken legs with vegetables. We ate what was served or sat there until we did! If only it were so easy at our house. If I served bread with every meal, that is all they would eat! There is rarely a meal which pleases all of our palates. Sigh. We try to enforce the "no thank you bite" rule and all try to have the same meal. We do allow our non-meat enjoyer to have beans instead. We occasionally have free for all nights where our eldest will eat eggs or pasta with garlic, 6 yob will eat something with peanut butter, 5 yob will eat whatever Daddy has (he is our "meatyboy" ..really enjoys meat, but does not enjoy pasta at all!). The younger two will share my meal of leftovers, salad, tuna, etc..
All of the children used sippy cups for as long as I could get away with it. Our table is stone upon which glasses shatter easily. We have major juice abuse in our home. I cut it with water, but we have not been able to have the children drink water with dinner. Even the baby cries if she sees me pour water into her cup! We go easy on the dairy as I am finding it difficult on everyone's digestive systems.
Chari, enjoy this special time with your children.. they may cherish the fun picnics with Mom as some of their favorite memories!
Blessings,
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kristina
yesterthoughts
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Sarah
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We eat as a family almost every night. Sometimes, dh has a mtg. with dinner provided, so we eat alone at those times. We HAVE to eat at the table or the kids trash the couches and carpet. Our mealtimes are very regular.
Dh and I serve up usually from the stove.
I use nice plates for dinner--sometimes paper for other meals.
I bought a set of nice-looking plates from SmartBargains.com. They were cheap, but look nice.
Occasionally Target has some nice plates.
We use paper napkins.
There is usually lots of talking. . .
Every once in a while dh runs late unexpectedly, but dinners done, people are trying to sneak snacks. In that case we start without him. And almost always, the kids come back to visit with Dad.  They miss him all day and have lots to say. Sometimes, I can't get a word in. . .
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Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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Rachel May
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The only thing I have to add is that we have had to start limiting the kids to one funny joke per meal. "Funny" is decided by Daddy, usually whatever comes out of their mouths because otherwise the non-sequitors would go on forever!
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Rachel
Thomas and Anthony (10), Maria (8), Charles (6), Cecilia (5), James (3), and Joseph (1)
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ShawnaB
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We need to take a video of our dinner hour....because I'm sure it would be hilarious to watch in 10 years when we are all more grown up and "civilized."
Technically, we all eat at the same time...and it looks something like this:
Amelia and Abraham are engaged in some loud banter, usually dropping food or spilling something. Abraham rapid-fires questions at anyone who will listen, and Amelia sings away like the star of her own musical...oblivious to the fact that anyone else is talking.
I usually am acrossed the room on the couch nursing one baby, while Jacob sits at the table and shovels mashed food into the mouth of the other baby mouth in the highchair. Sometimes I nurse at the table, always dropping food onto my shirt in the process. There is frequently a diaper change somewhere in the midst...last night I excused myself to administer a "wipe" for Amelia in the bathroom before dinner was over. Jacob received two business calls on his cell..and had to explain that "yes, you've reached the right number..."
Some nights we are fortunate and one or more of the babies will "bounce" in the excersaucer or johnny-jump-up while we all "dine" together. Dinner is always consumed in a fraction of the time it took to prepare, and an even smaller fraction of the time it will take to clean up the aftermath. Children rise from the table, scattering a path of rice and crumbs and gooing their hand prints from the dining room to the bathroom. Sometimes it feels like we are savages....
And this too will pass....
I am glad that we are keeping the tradition of mealtimes together, regardless of how riduculous it can seem at times. However, for this mom, my favorite dinner at the moment is the one I share in a restaurant with my husband!
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Shawna, wife of Jacob, mom to Abraham 8 Amelia 5 and Jillian & Jonathan age 3 years http://www.psalm121family.com
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chrisv664
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Dinner at our house is different each night of the week. My husband is never home before 7PM and by that time, my older girls (15 and 18) are usually out at an activity- one dances and the other is a youth group leader. So, even though I don't consider myself that organized a person, I have improved in the meal-planning area this schoolyear... I check the schedule on Sunday afternoon and figure out what time we need to eat on each weeknight and what time allows me to cook... big meal, crockpot, something quick. I plan the meals to be served at the time I have the most people home, the others get warmed-up meals. Sundays we have a big meal around 4pm so that my teens can get to the teen Mass by 6.
The dinner table is usually pretty noisy. We have a saying here that it is never a meal at our house until someone spills something-- including Mom and Dad!
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Chris
Loving Wife of Dan and Mom to Kate, Jessica, Ben,
Rebecca, Thomas and Hannah
Burning The Candle At Both Ends
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Angie Mc
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Hey Chari,
The key for me is to delegate as much of the dinner work as possible. Our 7yo sets the table as one of his chores. DD or I make dinner, never fancy during the week, but something healthy and enticing. Depending on the meal, we usually bring cookware/pots to table. We say our prayers and serve. Let the blabfest begin! Then we clear the table, passing everything to the end of the table near the kitchen. 7yo clears the table, 10yo washes dishes and loads dishwasher. DD deals with any food that needs to be stored.
I can gauge the state of our family by our family dinners. If cereal is served too often, I know I need to regroup! For us, though, the cereal will at least be at the table.
Having said that, there have been times when lunch or breakfast was our main "sit as a family" meal. For now, including everyone for dinner fits best.
If you haven't fallen asleep already due to all this tedium...here's more.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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stefoodie
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we eat dinner together most nights. pots and dishes passed around. some nights we have dinner really really late because of karate, but i'm hoping that will change once we're in ohio -- no more karate, at least not in school (they will continue lessons with dad in the basement instead, after work)....
some nights when we want to enjoy a movie we take everything upstairs in the master bedroom (the only place we have a TV in), use my dresser as a buffet table, and eat our meals on the bed. the kids really enjoy this occasional treat.
and then there's been a few times when we ate in the living room, picnic style -- usually because i cooked all day and made too big a mess in the kitchen and both island and table are filled with stuff. our pizza dinners (before we discovered the allergy to cheese) were almost always eaten this way.
i'm looking forward to barbecuing at the fireplace and picnicking around it in our new home. a spitjack is looking really enticing right now...
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stef
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Topic: dinner at your house
