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Genevieve
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I wonder if anyone feels this way and how you have dealt with it. My two children are young and the younger one actually just started toddling. This also means with a Montessori/stimulating environment there is much to pull off the shelves. I feel like I'm constantly putting things back so that I can walk across the floor. However, I'm beginning to think although my family needs a semi-clean house, they need a mom who is really there to do things with, not busy trying to pick up.
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Genevieve
The Good Within
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Sarah
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I wish I had an answer. I feel like all I do is pick-up, pick-up, pick-up. My ds 7, ds4, and dd2 are my biggest culprits and I try to employ their help but many messes are beyond them and their attention span. I spent this Thanksgiving holiday secretly feeling to myself (I didn't want to share my mood), that all I do is clean then sit down to nurse the baby, pass him off to dad and jump up to clean some more. I'm not OCD either (although it may sound like it). My house is always in a state of disaster and for me mess mean stress. I have improved some with the basic flylady principles.
I also feel like there has to be time for spending quality time with the kids, but if you let too time time go by before picking up again, you have to wade through mounds of stuff. Let me give you an example, our "family room" is our main hang-out room and it is also our "school room." Dd 2 has her "kitchen," ds 7&4 are into dressing up (hats, boots, gun holsters, etc-which are brought up from the basement.) This isn't stuff I want to give away because they absolutely love it!
I don't have an answer. Because we have our school room in the main living area we have lots of creativity going on constantly. Someone desides to make something for their play. Ds 7 made a menu for their restaurant using dd 2's kitchen. As I write this ds 4 is drawing with crayons. His face is happy, he's doing something good, but he also took out several sheets of paper than ended up on the floor with the piece he wanted. Its this activity times four that makes it nuts!
As for "5 minute room recovery"- nice in theory, but I can't get it to work here without yelling. I guess I need to work on this aspect of disicpline for the kids. I end up doing it alone. Ds 9, my oldest helps, but he can't be responsible for the messes of the little ones. I guess for now, I plug away, and deal with it. Does anyone else have an answer?
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Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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alicegunther
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Who was it that said "Cleaning the house while the children are young is like shoveling snow during a blizzard"? This is completely true! We have one room in particular in our house that gets tidied and wrecked five or six times a day. You would not believe what winds up on the floor in that room--banana peels, odd game pieces, hundreds of pencils, scraps of paper . . . . It is part of having very small children, I think, and I haven't found a solution for it! My goal is to try to contain the mess to that room (the den) so that it at least doesn't spill over into the entire house.
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Sarah
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alicegunther wrote:
| You would not believe what winds up on the floor in that room--banana peels, odd game pieces, hundreds of pencils, scraps of paper . . . . |
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This is so true! Throw in a pair of underwear (which I have right here on the floor as I write,) and we're set!! 
It makes me feel better that we are all in the same boat! 
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Tina P.
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alicegunther wrote:
| Who was it that said "Cleaning the house while the children are young is like shoveling snow during a blizzard"? |
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Phyllis Diller, but it could've been me. 
God bless,
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
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Tina P.
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I found an apple core hidden in a toy bucket with a few odds and ends toys. I used to laugh at television shows where people slipped on banana peels, thinking, oh, that's not real. HA! It is in this house.
It's always good to hear, isn't it Genevieve, that you're not alone in your frustrations. Sometimes I get into my own little world and forget that there are other people out there battling the same dragons that I battle.
St. George, pray for us!
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
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Genevieve
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Tina P. wrote:
| It's always good to hear, isn't it Genevieve, that you're not alone in your frustrations. |
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Isn't that the truth? I'm currently trying to practise self-restraint and try to block off times when I just be there for the kids instead of trying to squeeze a little more pick-up. I think I"m over-doing Flylady.
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Genevieve
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Genevieve
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alicegunther wrote:
| Who was it that said "Cleaning the house while the children are young is like shoveling snow during a blizzard"? |
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I never heard anyone describe it as such but love it! I might post it on my bathroom mirror!
alicegunther wrote:
| My goal is to try to contain the mess to that room (the den) so that it at least doesn't spill over into the entire house. |
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Now this gives me ideas on how to plan my space next year when we move to someplace bigger.
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Genevieve
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Genevieve
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Sarah wrote:
Let me give you an example, our "family room" is our main hang-out room and it is also our "school room."
I don't have an answer. Because we have our school room in the main living area we have lots of creativity going on constantly.
Does anyone else have an answer? |
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My situation is similar to yours. We only have one living area and it's actually combined with the dining room area. I have no answer for you thoughI try to offer it up as sacrifice. A clean room for a wonderful childhood. I do put it back in order at the end of the day so I can pretend we really have a clean house in the morning before the kids wake up.
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Genevieve
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Sarah
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I thought of something yesterday. Get a big basket and run and fill it with everything that doesn't belong in that room and then walk with the basket through the house delivering the it here and there. Of course, then I tried it, and the basket was filled to the top with a load of laundry that ended up unfolded on the couch, since . . to add to the asthetics of our school room/family room combo, it joins the laundry room. . .with no door on it BECAUSE the door was supposed to be a sliding door, but someone evidently forgot to MAKE the wall pocket to slide into, so they added a doorknob to the sliding door and made it a regular door that opens into the tiny laundry room space, which the door took up, thus making it so that one HAD to remove the door in order to use the laundry room effectively. So, when people come over and sit on the couch and look forward they see my washing machine and a pile of clothes that spill out the door (since the laundry chute is right in front of the door) This is all right next to the child-size table and a sea of papers and crayons that are always under it. No wonder I get crayons in the wash !
I realized one of my problems, and I know excuses are always found as a reason for not getting stuff done, but I am accutely aware that I'm trying to raise a big family and homeschool in a house that was:
1-designed by an idiot
2-meant for two kids or less
3-never meant to cook a meal in.
When I finally take the designer of my home hostage  I'm going to ask him why he . . .
1- put the kitchen sink right against a wall so there's no room for dirty dishes?
2-made the laundry chute dump into a doorway where company comes, making shutting the door impossible
3-made a broom closet so short that only a child's broom could stand in it (or you could bend the bristles and put it in diagonally )
4-Didn't put wall studs all the way to the ceiling or to the floor and not at standard distances-hanging any kind of shelving is impossible
This is just scratching the surface. . . come for a tour if you need a good laugh. Why we bought it is a long story----nice yard
Thanks for letting me vent.
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Elizabeth
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Yep. I do spend too much time cleaning. At least, that 's what I've been told. People don't tell me that because my house is clean though. Instead, they make that observation when they know that I am cleaning--that is, in the process of making my house clean. I'm always cleaning because my house is never clean. It's a process and it will not be clean until they are far fewer little people here all day. I've noticed that people who make the judgment (somewhat unkindly) that I clean too much, either have much less need for order than I do or have fewer children. I find order to be a necessity; we function better as a family when things are orderly AND I feel better. Both of those things are valid reasons to try to keep one shovelfull ahead of the blizzard .I'm not striving for an impossible standard--just one shovel full. So, I don't feel guilty any more about time spent cleaning. My family is better for it.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Rachel May
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Sarah wrote:
| I thought of something yesterday. Get a big basket and run and fill it with everything that doesn't belong in that room and then walk with the basket through the house delivering the it here and there. |
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Each of the kids has their own small laundry basket so I I spread out what needs to be put away. Unfortunately, Bill's razor blades ended up in the basket of things for me to put away so we didn't find them for two weeks. I know this system wouldn't have worked even a year ago. Until now and often still, I walk around the house chanting to myself, "It's not my season to have a clean house...."
Sarah wrote:
I realized one of my problems, and I know excuses are always found as a reason for not getting stuff done, but I am accutely aware that I'm trying to raise a big family and homeschool in a house that was:
1-designed by an idiot
2-meant for two kids or less
3-never meant to cook a meal in.
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Sarah, you had me laughing out loud at this. Our houses must be designed by the same people. Our stove has 2 burners (!) and is accessible from both sides because it's on an island. The one room where the kids can play is the one that has the hearth. You should see the blood stains on my clothes from the 3 yo (nicknamed Boo-boo) and the baby. And our back yard is a hill straight up. That's what happens when you have to pick a house from 6,000 miles away.
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Sarah
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Rachel May wrote:
Our houses must be designed by the same people. Our stove has 2 burners
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YES!!!!!!!!We had two burners too until two months ago when it blew up--literally. . .I actually heard a BOOM! Then we had to order a new stove and pay MORE for another two burners!  I love hearing about funny things like this!
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JennGM
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Rachel May wrote:
| Our stove has 2 burners (!) and is accessible from both sides because it's on an island. The one room where the kids can play is the one that has the hearth. You should see the blood stains on my clothes from the 3 yo (nicknamed Boo-boo) and the baby. And our back yard is a hill straight up. That's what happens when you have to pick a house from 6,000 miles away. |
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I turned down quite a few houses because I didn't want my cooktop on an island. I thought it would be a hazard. I have enough as it is. I wanted a range, but I ended up with a kitchen with a cooktop that has two electrtic burners (one small, one large) and a grill (which I will NEVER use). It's something we need to change. And built in is a microwave and oven combo. Another thing we need to update. That might be my Christmas, but it sure would be appreciated and used!
We have a hearth, also. We had a week between closing and move-in date. The hearth is raised brick high...and he cut open his head that week. I have it covered with foam, but it's still a hazard. Dh had to have his fireplace, I get my heartburn....
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Karen E.
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And I think it was Erma Bombeck who said, "Housework, when you have children, is like stringing beads without a knot."
I often repeat that to myself ... "just keep stringing, stringing, stringing...."
Sarah, you mentioned the basket idea -- we have a basket that sits upstairs and it is the collection point for all things that need to go downstairs. I used to say, "Okay, guys, get the-basket-of-stuff-to-go-downstairs," and finally my oldest got tired of that long label.
"Why don't we just name it?" she said. "It's George."
So, now I can just say, "Empty George, you guys," and they deliver things to their proper places.
Of course, my kids are getting older, and we've been working on these things for awhile. I think it's a constant process of training, but also an acceptance that certain things won't be "perfect" until the kids are all grown.
Then, of course, we'll all be on an email list called, "Depressed Empty Nesters."
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Karen E.
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Genevieve wrote:
| the younger one actually just started toddling. This also means with a Montessori/stimulating environment there is much to pull off the shelves. |
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I just thought of something else. When mine were littler, I also wanted that Montessori type environment, but I also limited and rotated things. Maybe you could cut back on some of what's accessible, and just rotate it?
This doesn't solve the problem, but it helps a wee bit.
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Karen E.
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Visit my blog, with its shockingly clever title, "Karen Edmisten."
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Sarah
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jenngm67 wrote:
| I wanted a range, but I ended up with a kitchen with a cooktop that has two electrtic burners (one small, one large) and a grill (which I will NEVER use). It's something we need to change. . |
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Our house had a grill, too, but then we found a griddle top in the cupboard that is interchangeable, and I loved that. I never used the grill, but I used the griddle for pancakes (6 @ once  ), quesadillas, grilled cheese, etc. You might check with a repairman or Home Depot-like store to see if they can order the griddle attachment, if it has one. Its cheaper than a new stove and makes it more usable until you can a new stovetop.
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Spending too much time cleaning?
