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Sarah Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 17 2005 Location: N/A
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Posted: May 02 2007 at 8:17pm | IP Logged
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I've had it! After spending the entire day in 2 doctor's offices from ds 21 months and his fractured arm and elbow, ds8 has chipped an enormous part of his PERMANENT front tooth off roughhousing tonight with his brother. "It was all in fun." Ha!
I'm just sick about his tooth. What will he look like? Dracula? Its his FRONT tooth!
The last months have been one semi-serious injury after another. I've never seen anything like it! I had one brother and these things just didn't happen. Is this normal? I only have 4 boys. What will it be like when this baby I'm pregnant with join the ranks? I'm sure its another boy. (I DO love my boys, but I'm so frustrated with the constant level of activity resulting in injury and destruction).
If you've ever seen "7 Brides for 7 Brothers" you will have a glimpse into what I feel like my boys are like. Rough, nuts, and constantly hurt.
What can I do? I just sit down for a minute and someone is crying or wrestling or chasing or jumping, etc.
I'm at my wits end with this. Please help me with some sort of encouragement. I'm in the middle of a novena for encouragement from John Bosco. Help!
__________________ Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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Philothea Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 02 2007 at 8:49pm | IP Logged
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Veneers look like the real thing these days. I don't know what else to say, except I sympathize -- my husband was one of five brothers (and two sisters) and the stories he tells me make my hair stand on end. I think the constant ER visits are normal, and increase proportionally to the number of boys living in the house. I have one boy who is VERY active and his Guardian Angel works overtime to keep him from serious injury. We've been very fortunate. I am pregnant again and we will see who shows up!
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MarieC Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 19 2005 Location: Ohio
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Posted: May 02 2007 at 9:05pm | IP Logged
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I don't have any advice but it isn't just boys....
My girls have had:
a broken collar bone
tooth injury
a broken arm
concussion
another broken arm
puncture wound to the head
puncture wound to the tongue
I'm embarrassed to admit all those injuries...we look negligent (especially since they are 9 and under!).
Good Luck!
__________________ Marie
mom to 6
dds-98, 00, 02 and 09 & dss-03 and 06
Out in the Orchard
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ALmom Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 02 2007 at 9:36pm | IP Logged
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Sarah:
4 boys - very, very normal. They have tremendous energy and there is always something going on, much you don't even know about (sorry don't mean to frighten you).
Our 10 yo, unknown to us, climbed the side of the house (using the decorative brick on the corner which I never would have thought stuck out enough to get a foothold) and got higher than the garage roof. Now, nice to know he could safely get out in a fire - but this is now speciifically FORBIDDEN. However, who would have thought to specify, you cannot climb the side of the house over the height of the roof or no forging hand made swords on the grill. I would think 10 yo would know this. The boys sword fight, chase, wrestle, ride their bikes (with mandatory helmuts at least) down the front steps and flying down the sidewalk. They challenge each other and have to one upmanship - even imaginary games involve who has the better, stronger, bigger, whatever it is.
So far we have had 2 broken arms, a couple of dislocated elbows, 2 sets of stiches and a broken tooth (I didn't believe my 4 yo when he said his tooth was loose, I should have) that required medical attention - Other injuries where we didn't take them in just looked like someone had beat them up, which is a whole nother fright if people don't know you well. We also have wax meltings (see different post) and other assundry messes as a result of their explorations and experiments. I can give you a detailed description thanks to my 10 yo of exactly how much melted wax to paint on a paper airplane so that it can fly in the rain but not be too heavy. Unfortunately the 4 yo also tried the melting was and made a mess!!! We also get pet critters, including snakes to observe (I generally give ample interest (with the snakes I verify that they knew it was not poisonous) and promptly suggest it needs its home, outside where God gave it the proper skills to survive).
Sometimes, I know the neighbors (very quiet and proper with only girls and 1 boy) may think we do not supervise or wonder why our boys are using or doing various things - sometimes it is allowed as in teach the proper use of and safety of use as the best policy and sometimes it is an unknown venture done while I'm working with a different child and they are supposed to be playing "in the back yard." They do always obey my directions, they just assume a lot in their favor. So playing in the back yard, I've learned, may include building a swing over a cliff and swinging on it by moving the swingset ladder over to the tree to climb and dangle the swing from (higher than the 2nd story roof). Then the 4 yo goes out, thinks it is his turn and tries to push 10 yo off (youngest is tough with all those brothers) and manages to grab with one hand just long enough to be over the edge of the cliff when he falls. This all happens in a split second and I show up in time to retrieve injured child. His face was swollen for a month at least and we think that might be how he broke his tooth. Fortunately no broken bones on this one (the broken bones were from more mundane stuff like falling out of a kitchen chair - well one was jumping out of a tree after being told not to jump from the wall).
Only a few things I can tell you (and I know I'm just getting used to boys in a row after 2 girls):
make sure there is plenty of appropriate physical activity throughout the day. If they like to test their strength and agility - get chin up bars.
be specific if you can outthink them - but don't expect to prevent all dangerous activity and never be down on yourself if you don't anticipate it all - they are very bright children, after all. This means you also always pray to their guardian angels.
when you come out and it is too late to stop the most dangerous adventure (ie they are in very thin tree branches over the 2nd story roof and you doubt the branches will hold them), don't yell, call them down or do anything that will distract them. You first pray to the guardian angel, try to make eye contact, and then indicate by thumbs down that you want them down ASAP.
When they do something scarey - don't tell them they'll get hurt. Say, you make mom nervous and then use this as the reason to set any limits or rules.
Ask dad if the activity is appropriate before forbidding it. This keeps balance and perspective so we don't stifle our sons.
do as much teaching to use properly as possible as soon as interest is shown and then have rules, rules, rules. The boys are allowed to wrestle - as long as everyone is having fun. As soon as it is no longer fun for any one of them, it is no longer a game and activity must immediately cease. (It is sometimes quite difficult to tell the difference so they are used to me asking - is everyone having fun, here, and specifically asking the child who squeeled or whatever. Turns out they love to pretend to see if they can trick me - so at some point there is a rule about this too, to spare my sanity .
make sure vision, etc is always in good order. With all they try, they cannot afford not to see well. Two of our boys had some astigmatism that seemed to contribute to some major bike wrecks that are not so major anymore with glasses.
In the end, you do get rather laid back about these activities. A broken arm does heal so wild bicycle rides with a helmut not near the street are OK - falling off the same height as the roof from climbing some crevice might really result in a much more life-threatening injury and therefore is forbidden. At least that is how we operate here - try to be a hands off, let them explore until it becomes dangerous enough to be likely to cause permanent injury. We do joke that we are the Beverly Hillbillies of the neighborhood.
Well, not much help, I know. But perhaps it is nice to know that it is normal and you probably have plenty of company.
Janet
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Martha Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 02 2007 at 10:13pm | IP Logged
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Yeah. I hate to tell you this, because I know it's not what you want to hear, but what Janet said.
I've got 4 boys, a girl, 2 more boys, and our baby girl.
It's normal and it never stops and they drive me batty!
On any given day, most of my sons look like we beat their heads together or rolled them all together in a barrel down a mountain. Poor older dd in the middle sometimes gets injuries from the sidelines too.
No amount of threat of loss of limb or death will convince any of my boys not to climb trees WAY higher than our 2 story house. At least if they fall the house will break the desent to the ground?
My husband and I didn't grow up with siblings so it's very unnerving to us both. Really bad days early in parenting them are what let us to the expression of having "A Hard Liquer Day" But I am getting used to most of it and I find I roll with more that another mom would be very unnerved by.
__________________ Martha
mama to 7 boys & 4 girls
Yes, they're all ours!
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: May 02 2007 at 10:18pm | IP Logged
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boys will be active.. wear them out doing something so they have less need for the roughhousing etc. Mine are always more wild when confined for long.. but we've got them doing physical work and sports.. we have the older ones in swim team during the summer, soccer in the fall, and lacrosse in the winter/spring and probably into summer (not sure since it's just starting up here) these sports keep them moving.. swim team practise is basically an hour of nothing but swimming laps.. and lacrosse keeps them running as does soccer.. very little standing around waiting for anything. And when that's not enough.. I even send them out to run to the end of our street and back to get them to settle down
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Becky Parker Forum All-Star
Joined: May 23 2005 Location: Michigan
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 6:08am | IP Logged
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Dh and I were just discussing this topic since boy #4 will be born in July. I recall my own childhood with 3 brothers, 2 of which were twins. My poor mother was always taking someone to the hospital (usually one of the twins!). We have just remodeled our basement and are looking for furniture. We're thinking really heavy duty. My brother, who has 5 boys says we should forget the furniture for a while and just lay wrestling mats on the floor! This is literally what he did. (Of course, he wrestled in highschool and is now a coach so the wrestling mats were available to him). I guess growing up in a family of rowdy boys has helped me to just realize that "that's what they do". Jodie has some real words of wisdom above. I think my mother had my brothers in every sport available! My ds's don't have that but they sure do alot of work around our house.
By the way, Seven Brides for Seven Brothers is one of the favorite movies around here. Of course they all like the fighting part the best!
__________________ Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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soodow Forum Pro
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 6:08am | IP Logged
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Sarah,
We have 2 dc who have broken front teeth. ds (who is now 22) received his hit in the tooth from dd (now 25)... (12&15yo the year of the "accident").
They were out shoveling snow because their inside behavior needed improvement ! They were shoveling with METAL shovels and got to fooling around and !
The other dd, 12 at the time of the crime,(now 16)was "playing" with her dad. Some sort of tag game with a football and hiding involved... well dd ducked down to hide and her 2 FRONT teeth hit a wood stove (that she neglected to notice) and demolished 1/4 of each tooth (we're talking to DUST).
Anyway.. point being... so far the teeth have been built up with ?? and they look great. Someday they will have to go with veneers or something as the built up part will be a different color than the original.. so far so good.
So... ds's, dd's, DAD... all quite "wild" here!
Sue
mom of 6
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Lisbet Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 6:46am | IP Logged
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Oh Sarah, I feel ya! I have boy, girl, boy boy, girl, boy boy, girl, and then another boy on the way. I will admit, when I found out this guy was a boy, I was a little, um, unnerved myself. I'm thrilled I love my boys, but, well, I just don't 'get' them most of the time. The rough housing is crazy most days, the noise, OY!
I always here boys will be boys and the like, and I completely agree, but, one must draw the line somewhere, right?
__________________ Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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Lisbet Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2006 Location: Michigan
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 6:50am | IP Logged
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Oh Becky, that reminds me of a good friend of mine with 4 rowdy boys. At one time she had all of the furniture out of her livingroom and moved to the family room just so the boys had a place to let loose without hurting themselves or their belongings.
__________________ Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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Angel Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 7:16am | IP Logged
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Becky Parker wrote:
Dh and I were just discussing this topic since boy #4 will be born in July. I recall my own childhood with 3 brothers, 2 of which were twins. My poor mother was always taking someone to the hospital (usually one of the twins!). |
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Oh, Becky, I did not want to hear this! I'm sure that's what I'm going to be doing with my twins, too. They're so *rough* and they have absolutely no fear.
Till now it's my dd with the serious injuries (dog bite to the face, broken wrist), but the babies (19 months) are constantly getting banged up and they just come back for more. The other day one of them took off running down our hill toward the driveway and, being pregnant, I couldn't quite make it in time. He was going too fast to stop for the step, fell smack on his forehead on the driveway, picked himself up and kept on going. I am constantly worried that they're going to have some sort of brain damage.
The one I'm expecting is a boy, too. I have to say that even my husband was a little daunted by the prospect of another one! (this one makes 5!)
--Angela
Three Plus Two
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Maryan Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 7:24am | IP Logged
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Oh Sarah!
I'm sorry for the dr.s visit, but this thread has been fun -- this is my life (as it is many of yours too!) I remember being so afraid when I found out that I was having a boy first (oldest of six girls here) and dh had told me too many stories of his life with 7 brothers!
So I bought this book before my first son was even born:
What Little Boys Are Made Of
We read it together on the days I need to be reminded of all the great joys of BOYS!! (Or I read it by myself!)
Roughhousing, wrestling before bed, jumping off all sorts of objects, climbing, and then... weapons made out of every object imaginable, superhoes in action all day long, and NBA, NFL, MBA stars scoring the final whatever in the final seconds of the game... It's all very active. I have boundaries -- but they're always tested!! And there are no balls in the house -- downstairs or outside! Oh... and then my grocery bill... AND MY OLDEST ISN'T EVEN SIX YET!!
So... what Jodie says -- I use the "wear them out" tactic. It turns out -- this is my weight loss program! And Janet... we live on an old farm field -- I picked this lot on purpose because it didn't have any TALL trees (I know, no fun -- but I didn't think my heart could take it!!)
The gory stories are too long, but I will say I have a theory that boys get rowdier and braver EXPONENTIALLY in numbers...
And my husband and I are reading a book about St. John Bosco!! I definitely think he's the saint for helping with patience and understanding with boys!
__________________ Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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Elizabeth Founder
Real Learning
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 7:26am | IP Logged
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I'll pray that novena with you, Sarah...on my way to the orthopedist where we'll replace the cast that Patrick got last week. Why replace it? Oh, because I don't have anything else to do today...I mean, because he wore through the bottom of it .
This child cannot--absolutely cannot--stay still, nor can he refrain from pushing himself to his physical limits.
__________________ Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Sarah Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 10:47am | IP Logged
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Sorry I sounded so nuts everyone. It was a really hard day. I really do love my boys. I just worry about all these injuries. It does scare me because as Janet was saying, you cannot anticipate what will happen next.
My husband says that he does "Family Medicine." He is a family doc and it has paid off here. I cannot tell you how many times our kitchen table has been used for stitches and other procedures.
Yesterday when we were in a big exam room at daddy's office the boys were recalling all the things they had done to them in that same room.
"Hey, this is where I came when half my finger was dangling off from that bike chain!"
"Yeah, I was in here when I had stitches from that utility knife."
As I write I hear that infamous noise upstairs. Crash bang boom.
And now I better go, they just came downstairs with dd3 in tears as they have her long hair completely wound around their remote control car wheels. How on earth will I get this out. . .before we head to the dentist. . . And I'm not just kidding!
Poor dd3, she is so tough, but she sticks very close to Mama!
PS. . .Dh confessed last night that his teeth are shorter in the front because he was doing a very dangerous stunt in the swimming pool and cracked both of them. This little story came out as I was on a tyrade about how somthing like this could happen?? He was one of 3 brothers in a row. He looked a little embarrassed as he told me.
And. . .he still gets hurt and he's a grown man!
__________________ Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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mary theresa Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 11:58am | IP Logged
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Okay, I have no boys yet but I am so amazed and admiring of you all for dealing with all this. I had three brothers and they weren't that bad, cuz there were 4 girls older bossing them around.
My husband, OH MY GOSH. He is the 2nd in a string of SEVEN boys in a row, all born within 10 or 11 years. the stories they tell! I don't know whether to laugh or be horrified or pray that i never have boys with the genes of my husbands family!
Some stories, in case you want to feel better about your boys
-- six little boys riding their bikes over the seventh boys arm that was in a cast to see if they could break the cast!
-- pouring olive oil ALL over the kitchen floor at 6 am and skating over it and slamming into the cabinets
-- building fireworks and nearly blowing up the bedroom (just ended up being smoke-filled)
-- one of them almost had his t*st*cle ripped off I think jumping off swings
-- one of them's pelvis was run over by a truck (he's okay now, but is crooked)
There's way more I just can't think of right now. (I think I block some of it out )
Oh, AND as ADULTS, 3 months ago on the morning of the #4 brothers' wedding day they got in shopping carts that were abandoned on our road and had another brother push them down the hill on the ROAD with NO way of stopping.
Seriously, marriage has barely even tamed my husband.
__________________ Mary Theresa
mother to 3 little girls --March '06, Dec '07 and Jan '10
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joann10 Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 12:35pm | IP Logged
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We have had 2ds and 1dd with broken front teeth. You can't even tell anymore because they were fixed so well. My dd was 7 when she broke hers(bike racing), she thought that she looked so cool we didn't get it fixed until she reached the age that she started caring about how it looked. (she is 19 now and a real beauty- she can't believe her pictures from those days.)
We also have had so many broken bones ( 11 )our orthopedist has told us to bypass the e.r. and come right to his office if we can. He told us he keeps a very short list of patients that he sees immediately if the need arises.
I don't see this slowing down, but the stories my husband tells about his young days(5 boys) make me feel that my kids are well under control.
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trish Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 2:03pm | IP Logged
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We've been relatively lucky with our boys. Only three trips to the er for stitches and only one broken arm. However there isn't a morning or evening that goes by without someone getting hurt. My 10 yo dd is usually in on the action too.
I love arnica. Both the balm and the homeopathic remedy. I sure get alot of use out of it.
My dh comes from a family of 6 boys and 1 girl. From the stories they tell they are all lucky to be alive. (especially the sister)
__________________ ~ Trish ~
Wife to Les
Mom to 8 Wonderful Kids
+AMDG+
Saintly Soaps
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Sarah Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 03 2007 at 4:47pm | IP Logged
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Elizabeth wrote:
I mean, because he wore through the bottom of it .
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That's amazing, but I can totally see that with an active child!
This thread has cheered me up. I laughed so hard about the "cast test" with runing over it. I can see my boys doing that. And that's one of those things you wouldn't think to even mention beforehand.
Can you see it on the way home from the doctor, "Now guys, when we get Billy home, NO running over his cast with your bikes to check for durability. Okay?"
We got dd3 untangled and ds8 to the dentist for a new whatever its called and it looks about new. They will keep working to get the color right. Its supposed to be replaced every five years and then finally capped or crowned. At least he feels better. It really didn't seem to phase him (or his father)as much as it did me.
Thanks everyone more the encouragement and laughs. I really really needed it!!!
__________________ Six boys ages 16, 14, 11, 7, 5, 2 and one girl age 9
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stacykay Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 04 2007 at 5:59am | IP Logged
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I had to laugh at your stories!
Becky, my boys love the fighting part of 7 Brides for 7 Brothers. Doesn't matter if they're watching it or not, when it gets to that scene, someone yells, "the fight is coming up!"
Elizabeth, the cast- my ds used his as a hammer to pound a nail into the wall.
Boys are rambunctious and high energy.. They are rough and do crazy things (5yo ds was halfway up a 30 ft. pine yesterday, when I yelled to him to get down!)
We've only had one fight, that I would call even close to "real," but they are tough and roll around and tackle and are normal boys.
It is so noticeable when a boy comes over who has no brother. I always have to caution my crowd to take it easy on him!
With only two sisters, it took me a long time to get used to "boys." I always liked them , just didn't realize how very different they were until I had my own.
Janet had lots of good ideas, Sarah. My guys are all into sports (except the 2 yo., but he plays outside all day when possible,) but I think that just takes off the "edge," so they aren't knock-down, drag-out physical with each other.
God Bless!
Stacy in MI (6 dss, Matt-19, Mike-16 1/2, Pete-12, Mark-9, Paul-5 1/2, and John-2 3/4)
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stacykay Forum All-Star
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Posted: May 04 2007 at 6:03am | IP Logged
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Oh, I forgot to add, we have found it to our advantage to upgrade our medical insurance whenever possible. (Opting for the lower co-pays, lower deductibles, etc.)
Whenever dh starts to think he would like a lower premium, with higher copay or deduct., that is always the year we have multiple er visits, surgeries, or I get pregnant!
I guess I need to make a chart of all the broken bones, stitches, etc!
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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