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CelesteMary
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Posted: Feb 18 2013 at 12:18pm | IP Logged Quote CelesteMary

Hello everyone. I am once again at the site I trust for real answers.

May God bless you all during this lent and a special prayer of thanksgiving to the moderators on this site.

Now here is my issue:

I've always been a type "A" personality. Oldest child, alcoholic abusive father, well you get the picture.

This somehow made me want to be able to control my environment- not let people hurt me, put up a wall, protect myself from pain....

Fast forward today eight children, homeschooling, still trying to be perfect, a semi demanding husband who expects the tidiness of the Leave it To Beaver house he grew up in....

For the last couple of years since my twins I have on and off had some really funky symptoms not to be detected by anything at the doctor's office.

The most annoying and sometimes scary one is that my meals need to be on time and perfectly balanced or I feel like I will faint or even worse on the spot. Praise God, I never have.

It was really intense after I had my last child almost two years ago now. It was as if my body didn't have enough energy to sustain me, even to go to the bathroom.

I persevered and was back to almost perfect, in my mind anyway. I got my energy back, was able to work out and get back into shape even.

Then a few weeks ago now, my type "A" and I revved up my workouts and now I am feeling similar to when I had my last baby.

I looked my symptoms up online which I know is a big no no for types like me and my symptoms matched up almost perfectly with someone with adrenal fatigue.

I really don't have anyone I can talk to about this. My husband thinks all of these things are "made up." I mean he comes from the kind of family where there was no weakness shown and you just forge through with your tasks no matter the cost. He doesn't understand how anyone can over do anything.

He's a good man, but I need some support and was wondering if anyone here has any similar story that could shed some light for me?

BTW, I trashed the intense DVD that I was doing and will go back to walks when my body feels ready.

I am 41, will be 42 in August.

Any feedback would be greatly welcomed.

And wouldn't you know, such an attack right at lent?
Makes me wonder.

Thanks again and God bless!

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SallyT
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Posted: Feb 18 2013 at 1:20pm | IP Logged Quote SallyT

I think it's easy to have fatigue, period, for a host of reasons in your forties, especially when you're balancing many roles and burdens. It's been a while since I read up on adrenal fatigue specifically (and I know that doesn't mean just tiredness!), and I know there's some dispute about whether this syndrome actually exists, what causes it, etc etc etc. I guess I'm kind of on the fence between mainstream and alternative medicine . . .

Anyway, you don't say what your symptoms are, other than the faintness when your meals aren't on time (low blood sugar??). I can tell you from experience that peri-menopause, which can kick in in your early forties, can in and of itself generate an almost endless array of funky symptoms, including cyclical irregularities, fatigue, heart palpitations, panic and anxiety attacks, forgetfulness, mind fog, and on and on. This is also a time when thyroid problems surface, and these problems can be exacerbated or even triggered by stress.

It seems to me that this might be a good time to look into what's happening with your hormones, your thyroid, your blood sugar, and your levels of things like Vitamin D and magnesium. I feel much more balanced and healthy, for example, having begun to address a severe Vitamin D deficiency. Bloodwork for those kinds of things might not tell the whole story, but it might be someplace concrete to start. And it's not nuts to ask for that kind of thing -- your doctor will have seen early-forties women before. Start by asking about peri-menopause, the existence of which nobody disputes, and go from there.

I was totally gobsmacked by how *weird* my early forties were, in terms of my physical health. It was like waking up not in my familiar young and healthy body, but someone else's altogether. Whatever the cause of your strange symptoms, you're not nuts for feeling them. And you're surely right to peddle back the stress you were putting on your body via exercise while you start to sort it all out.

Running to pick up kids right now, but I'll send up a prayer for you. I don't know what your funky symptoms are, but I've had enough of my own to feel *really* sympathetic!

Sally

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CelesteMary
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Posted: Feb 18 2013 at 1:43pm | IP Logged Quote CelesteMary

Thanks Sally. You're right. I forgot to mention the other symptoms but you just about named them all. Palpitations, fatigue, cycle irregularities, anxiety...

lightheaded when standing from laying down or stooping over, and sleep disturbances. Funny, you did just about name them all though.

I will make an appointment with my doc and get blood work done. It has been a little over a year so I think it's time. I never asked to check for specific things, but I will be very particular now.

Thanks so much for your suggestion and God bless you.

BTW, are you currently experiencing these or been through it already?

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Posted: Feb 18 2013 at 4:07pm | IP Logged Quote SallyT

I'm 48 now and totally through menopause -- I had my last baby at 39, my symptoms began when I was 41, and by 45 my cycles had stopped. That's really early, and experiencing symptoms of peri-menopause at your age doesn't mean you'll go through the whole thing that early, but it's what happened to me. So I'm through most of the craziness (thank goodness!), but I remember it pretty vividly. Sleep disturbances: yep. I can still have insomnia from time to time.

My doctor at the time kind of waved off my symptoms, saying, yes, that sounds like peri-menopause, the only "normal" is that nothing is normal any more, and if you want hormone therapy you can have it, but it might be better just to ride it out. That's what I elected to do (and oddly enough, her offhandedness about what I was sure was some horrible terminal illness was kind of comforting).

At this stage, I find that good nutrition helps more than just about anything else -- getting protein for breakfast, for example, and being light on the carbs -- and I'm taking a multivitamin that includes some herbal components like vitex (chaste tree berry), which is supposed to offer hormonal support. Anyway, I've felt a lot better since I've been taking that. I have had my thyroid levels checked repeatedly, and nothing's ever been abnormal, but I was very Vitamin-D deficient at my lowest point.

Also: sleep. I have a hard time going to bed before midnight, but boy, can I tell a difference when I've gotten eight hours. And drinking water, because dehydration also makes you feel crummy in all kinds of weird ways. And cutting back caffeine -- I'm a coffee addict, as the first few days of Lent demonstrated to me yet again!

Overall, what was a shock to me was that making the effort to take care of myself would actually make a difference. When I was younger, I could bounce back from whatever abuse I wanted to dole out to myself: too little or interrupted sleep, no breakfast, skipping other meals, relying on coffee to get me through . . . Now if I can just make myself stop to do some self-care, I find I'm a lot better me for everybody. I probably would have been a lot better me years ago, too . . . but now there's less margin for error.

So -- I'm no expert, but I think that until we're in the middle of it, we often don't even think about the changes our bodies are going to go through, and we don't always anticipate how fast it can happen or how bizarre the experience is. There may or may not be more to your story than that, but having been there and been freaked out by it all, it's sure what occurs to me as a place to start!

Sally

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CelesteMary
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Posted: Feb 18 2013 at 9:27pm | IP Logged Quote CelesteMary

Thanks so much for sharing your situation. I don't know what I would've done had I been born in a time when women just didn't "talk about those things."

Thanks God for this forum!

I just tend to do do do and don't stop until God gets my attention. Then I think back on what I did in a day and think, that wasn't so much.

But like you said, in my twenties I could bounce around like a nut on a dime and not miss a beat. Maybe this is where the grace is supposed to start? As in growing older gracefully?

Not sure, but I know one thing. I think you are right about taking tha time to really pay attention to yourself. It's just too easy to put ourselves last. Such a cliche, but when you have a family a true one.

I suppose there is a graceful balance out there somewhere where we can tend to our needs as well as the needs as others. And if we don't then we won't be able to help anyone else. That's a wake up call for me.


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Posted: Feb 19 2013 at 9:29pm | IP Logged Quote stellamaris

I suffered from serious menopausal symptoms and adrenal fatigue both for several years. I sometimes wondered if the adrenal problem was not brought on by peri-menopause, but at least it was worsened by it. The symptoms of the adrenal fatigue were extreme exhaustion, aching all over my body, a "deaden" emotional state--nothing tasted good, felt good, no joy, no sorrow, actually a weird detached kind of feeling. But I also would just "melt down" with exhaustion and feeling overwhelmed and start yelling at my kids to help me (and I am not usually a yeller!). When the doctor tested my adrenals, he said I had the choice of going to the hospital or beginning medication THAT DAY . It was pretty severe. I think it had been going on for a long time and was caused by the chronic stress I had in my life (ridiculously long story ...)

The peri-menopause symptoms included insomnia, hot flashes, nosebleeds, erratic cycles, heavy periods, an inability to concentrate, an inability to remember. Most of these symptoms have resolved now.

My doctor suggested that I could help myself alleviate stress by eating regular meals (good quality nutrition and at regular times) and getting regular sleep and moderate exercise. Those things are tough to do when you have a big family and a dh who is always at work! But, I have tried to put into place a little more self-care, not only for my own sake, but for the sake of my family. Caring for my health more thoughtfully helped both conditions.

Also, I found the following helpful:

1. I had a lot of negative self-talk, and it was creating a lot of stress for me. The book Feeling Good by David Burns really helped me address this area.

2. I reduced sugar/carb consumption a lot. Also, had to cut back on coffee (I do better when I cut it out completely, but...)

3. I take Cod Liver Oil, D3, probiotics, natural Vit C (amla). For a while I took high doses of B-5 (Pantothenic Acid) which helps heal the adrenals.

4. I started saying NO to a lot of things, and I am learning to let go of activities when I feel as if I'm trying to do too much. I actually never properly was able to identify that I was doing too much in the past...I just was extremely efficient and did a TON and thought nothing of it!! But it took a toll because I never relaxed and recuperated from the stress--I just lived on a stress "high" until I crashed! So learning to know when something is "too much" and not taking it on has been hard for me.

Getting older forces us to learn to balance our lives more thoughtfully and it is a great opportunity to really evaluate your priorities and focus on what is truly important. While going through all of these trials, I just couldn't see where God was (though I never doubted His presence and plan). Now, looking back, I see how much I have grown and that I have become more wise, secure, stable, and centered on God. It is a humbling thing to admit that you need to take care of yourself, too!

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CrunchyMom
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Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 10:46am | IP Logged Quote CrunchyMom

Caroline,

How did your doctor test you for adrenal fatigue?

I must admit, I have experienced these symptoms the past year or so

stellamaris wrote:
The symptoms of the adrenal fatigue were extreme exhaustion, aching all over my body, a "deaden" emotional state--nothing tasted good, felt good, no joy, no sorrow, actually a weird detached kind of feeling. But I also would just "melt down" with exhaustion and feeling overwhelmed and start yelling at my kids to help me (and I am not usually a yeller!).


Not so much the aching all over, though some arthritic-type symptoms that were really improved once I went gluten free. But the other stuff for sure. I didn't realize how much until this pregnancy hit and amplified it all. I actually looked up adrenal fatigue briefly, trying to figure out why I was so tired, before I realized I should take a pregnancy test and it was positive and assumed that was "the answer" and moved on.

I see that both you ladies, Sally and Caroline, supplement Vit D, and I *was* diagnosed with a Vit D deficiency when they did my blood screening at the first visit (I was at 10). I thought that explained the fatigue, and it might at that. But I guess I worry that it isn't *only* that. I really think that I was feeling this way prior to the pregnancy. I was very wary of having another pregnancy--I was so tired, but I chalked it up to being worn out from my youngest being so tough.

If you ladies will forgive me for flaunting my age in this forum, I'm also a little worried that I have symptoms at just 33 that so many of you attribute to your aging past 40. I remember at my birthday in December, feeling exhausted and looking at my husband saying, "I can't believe this is supposed to be my peak year!"

I can't blame the onset on perimenopause, that is for sure. And because of nursing, I've only cycled 3 times in the past 9+ years, so I don't have much of a gauge for measuring any female/hormone issues, but I haven't had any afaik.

Anyway, I too am reading your responses with interest. I'm almost 18 weeks, and while the nausea is better, I've yet to experience the 2nd trimester return of energy, which is disheartening. I seriously would love to go back to bed at any moment throughout the day, even as soon as after breakfast Sigh. It is encouraging to hear that you ladies have been able to come out of feeling this way, but with my being pregnant, I'm not even sure where to begin in figuring out what might be at the root of this.

It also doesn't help that I've always struggled with sloth It makes it really hard to discern the line between taking care of my self and succumbing to my natural temptations.

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Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 12:21pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

So I've been talking to some friends who have been diagnosed. Apparently they used a naturopath. And there's a saliva cortisol test that you can do. You can get it online but interpreting it yourself can be more difficult.

She also recommends This Site for helping pin point the actual problem.

And for treatment she apparently used supplements (recommended by the naturopath based on her tests) as well as trying to get enough rest, no caffeine/sugar/other stimulants and managing blood sugar levels (primarily through reducing/eliminating grains and sugar).

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CelesteMary
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Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 12:54pm | IP Logged Quote CelesteMary

Caroline,
Thanks so much for your story and symptoms. It's great to hear you getting past most of it and gives me hope.

Just like you said, it's almost as though while you are in the midst of doing, this can sneak up on you without proper self care. And me, even feeling guilty for needing time away from the kids.

Example: hubby works so I just take care of he and the children, which I thought was going along just fine.

The other day, I told him I really needed some R&R.
He took care of dinner Sunday night and then he took them to the mall and McDonald's on President's Day.

They were gone until 7:30pm or so. I can't tell you how fabulous I felt yesterday. I was able to get a bubble bath, take the time to do my hair pretty, put on a nice outfit. Hubby also gave me $50 to spend and I went and picked up a few kitchen items that I have been wanting for a while.

The remainder of the day, I played a new music station that I found and had it blaring through the house as they played old 80's favorites :-)
and had my favorite candle lit.

These are things I once took for granted. I think the underlying theme here is self care. Balancing our lives in nutrition, "moderate" exercise ( I tend to get a little nuts in this area), proper sleep (when the kids are finally down, who doesn't want to unwind to a favorite TV show or EWTN to get more spiritual juice for the net day?). Good relationships with other women who are going through or been there and done that is so helpful (which is why I love this forum). Holy women trying to make it happen in today's culture. Sometimes we can feel like we are the only ones out there. At least I do.

The blood sugar thing is huge though. My entire life I have been a carboholic. These last few years or so I have been balancing out my diet much better. When I feel better I slink into my old ways and start to feel that low blood sugar crash so intense it scares me.

This phase of life is truly a wake up call to me though.
It's never too late to heal, especially when we trust in God and slow down when the Holy Spirit prompts us. Thank you ladies for your input.

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Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 12:55pm | IP Logged Quote CelesteMary

Thank you Jodie,
I will check the site out.
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Posted: Feb 20 2013 at 1:28pm | IP Logged Quote CelesteMary

Lindsay,
Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I think the other ladies will agree that you just keep up with your regular doctor appointments for now and if there is any major imbalance they will find it. Maybe you could mention it to the doctor. I think I read that it's hard to test the adrenals because because it changes each time?

Focus on pampering yourself. Rest. Have hubby and children help when they can. If you homeschool, knock it down a few notches ( they beauty is you can catch up anytime). It's our lifestyle not a military school. I had to learn that first hand.

Something that helped me tremendously when I was pregnant with the twins. I was watching EWTN's Women of Grace and the host had a guest who was talking about True Devotion by St Louis De Montfort. Working on that devotion at one of the scarier times of my life was amazing. Even though I was still scared sometimes, I had a certain peace. Now I do this devotion each year or even more as needed. There is a certain peace when you give it all to Our Lady knowing that she is in turn giving all your cares and worries and good merits to our Lord. She wastes nothing. I do love this about our faith. We can offer it up. So easier to say than to do. ( I am still working on that myself )

When you have your baby and your hormones get back into balance somewhat, then you might go in to get all the testing done. Unless you feel that are in an emergency situation, of course.

Sometimes my body will freak out but it's nothing that can be pinpointed by the Doc which makes me feel even worse.

I do plan on going and getting blood work done soon. I find it interesting that as I improve my self care I feel way better. And I do take a good supply of supplements. I may have to add to them though. I currently take the Optivite vitamin recommended by Marilyn Shannon (Nutrition Cycles and Fertility), Peter Gillham's Natural Calm Magnesium powdered supplement, Rainbow Light's Cardio Performance with vitamin D3 and COQ10 and fish oil.

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Posted: Feb 27 2013 at 3:32pm | IP Logged Quote mamaslearning

Me to a T! Lots of the same issues in the past two years since my last pregnancy. What I've learned through that terrible time was how out of balance my body and life was overall. I exhausted my body with 4 pregnancies in 7 years plus nursing babes since 2004. My last pregnancy drained every bit of resources I had in my body and left me a wreck with anxiety, panic, exhaustion, blood sugar issues, lots of anger, etc. It's been a long path, but some things I've learned:

My body can get out of balance very quickly. If I miss an hour or two of sleep, I can't absorb that like I did 20 years ago. I need a couple days to recover. Same with eating a diet high in fat/junk. I feel horrible for days instead of hours!

Ovulation is very hard on my body - the hormone change causes anger, sleeplessness, and stress. I'm tracking better now so that I can plan that time of the month with less stressful events.

I need to really watch my vitamin and mineral levels (started with a holistic doc and now just monitor myself and how I'm feeling). Vit D (sunlight exposure) is critical to my well being! She diagnosed adrenal fatigues and I was on several supplements that helped me regain some balance.

Stress is more intense as I age. I just don't have the stamina to sustain continued stress anymore. I have to find ways to reduce or eliminate the stress. Prayer has been a huge help in this area, along with taking some time for myself. Once a month to go out with friends (MNO) to a local coffee shop has been a lifesaver! This was not an option while my youngest was still nursing, but now that he has weaned and is older, I can be away for a few hours (he's 2 now).

Hormones play a critical role in my state of being. Aging (I'll be 42 at the end of the year) coupled with pregnancies and nursing threw my hormones into wonky states. Now that my youngest has weaned, I finally, finally feel almost normal. Couple that with him beginning to sleep all night in his own bed, and I can tell a huge difference in my health and mental state. My doc (regular doc) said that it takes about two years for hormones to regulate after childbirth, and sometimes longer with nursing mothers.

Another thing to look at is reactive hypoglycemia. Feeling lightheaded and faint after eating is a common symptom. I'm extremely sensitive to body changes, including drugs, so it's natural that my body overreacts to food as well. I carry candy with me just like a diabetic in case I dip low. Do you take normal doses of medicines, or do half does seem to work? I take half doses because normal doses of most medicines create side effects. Even caffeine causes me problems and I have to limit it to once a week, if that.

Hope this helps!

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Posted: Feb 27 2013 at 6:04pm | IP Logged Quote stellamaris

CrunchyMom wrote:
Caroline,

How did your doctor test you for adrenal fatigue?

I must admit, I have experienced these symptoms the past year or so


Lindsay, good grief! Sorry I'm so slow in replying to your question, but I got online to reply and my internet connection went down, and then somehow life continued to happen for days on end, ! I managed to post a bit about the CM conference and then--POW!!!SMACK!!--just like in a Batman movie life descended

My doctor used a saliva test to check my adrenals. There is controversy over the accuracy of this test, but studies in Sweden have shown it to be very accurate. The problem is that it is hard to diagnose adrenal fatigue when a one-time blood draw is taken, since the level of cortisol in the body varies with the time of day.

Although I really had terrible symptoms in my 40's, I have to admit that even from 35 on there were many days when I thought to myself, "I think I'm dying.Something is WRONG." Seriously, I knew I wasn't depressed and yet I also knew that something was very wrong--that I had no energy or joy at all. No one who knew me then (except my confessor) would have had any idea that I was struggling so much. And, truthfully, I think a certain prideful inability to admit my own limits was part of the problem in my case (probably not in yours!) I was finally tested at 46 (after my last son was born at 45). Just shows how ridiculously stubborn and foolish I was to ignore my own severe exhaustion for over 10 years! As my dear Catholic doctor said, "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. You have pushed yourself beyond the limits of your flesh and now you have to take care of yourself."

So, anywhooo ,the saliva test is sent to a lab for analysis and yields a graph that shows how your cortisol levels change throughout the day. They should be high in the a.m. and fall to a low level in the evening. Mine were completely reversed, which was part of the reason I was having such difficulty sleeping.

Since you are pregnant-- super congratulations --I don't know if you would get any realistic idea about your adrenals. I think, though, that you could apply the healing ideas everyone has talked about above--all those self-care things that we as homeschooling moms fail to do. This is a time to ask your husband for more help so that you can rest and also do whatever makes you happy or relaxed for a bit, as Celeste described in her post. Healthy low-sugar food, lots of vegetables!, mild exercise, vitamins for pregnancy and plenty of rest and water are all so helpful. Hot foot baths, massages, whatever gets you relaxed. Positive thinking and prayer help calm interior distress and negativity. One of the causes of adrenal fatigue is that our lives are so busy and frantic that we never have time to relax and "come down" from levels of high cortisol that flood our bodies when we are stressed, whether physically, emotionally, or psychologically. Eventually, our adrenals just wear out from producing so much cortisol and then we crash when they can't produce enough to keep us healthy.

Adding some real salt (this is an example)to your diet can help counteract the cellular dehydration that low cortisol levels can cause (I'd ask your OB about salt levels during pregnancy) and certain herbal teas can promote relaxation, especially skullcap and chamomile. Again, I'd check with the doctor to be sure these would be safe in pregnancy. I wouldn't expect your doctor to be too knowledgeable about adrenal fatigue, since it is a disputed subject in medical circles.

After we have expected so much of ourselves for so many years, it takes quite a period of intentional self-care to regain our strength. It helps me to often remind myself that my weakness is an opportunity for my family to serve and for the strength of the Lord to be my own strength. I had to consciously let go of certain standards and really focus on the most important priorities. I certainly was not ever a perfect housekeeper, but I had to stop beating myself up for not getting it all done all of the time. I had to learn to be OK with OK, iykwim.

This verse became one of my favorites:

And he said to me: My grace is sufficient for thee; for power is made perfect in infirmity. Gladly therefore will I glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may dwell in me. ~2 Cor 12:9

HTH!

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Wife to dh 30+ yrs,ds's 83,85,89,dd's 91,95,ds's 01,01,02,grammy to 4
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