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Nique Forum All-Star
Joined: March 07 2008 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 29 2009 at 11:51pm | IP Logged
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How do you busy Moms discipline yourself to go to bed at a reasonable hour? Once our kids are asleep, it is like another world for me..the quiet, an uninterrupted conversation with my Husband, two free hands, the computer, so many things on my "to do" list that didn't get done earlier.
However, come morning and I get up with my kids, my first thought is "Tonight I'm going to bed EARLIER".
By bedtime, I'm tempted AGAIN to stay up late!
What's worked for you?
__________________ I had always thought that once you grew up you could do anything you wanted - stay up all night or eat ice cream straight out of the container. ~Bill Bryson
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kingvozzo Forum All-Star
Joined: March 28 2005 Location: Maine
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Posted: Sept 29 2009 at 11:58pm | IP Logged
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This is probably the biggest struggle for me. I feel as if this is the only time I have to myself. But, i also feel that my day would go a whole lot better if I got my self to bed a bit sooner.
Looking forward to other responses!
__________________ Noreen
Wife to Ed
Mom to 4 great kids and 10 sweet ones in Our Lady's arms
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 12:11am | IP Logged
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I plan bedtime for the kids so that I can get enough (enough is as good as a feast) down time after they're in bed.. even if they're awake and reading and not asleep yet.
So that I get my 2 hrs and then can get to bed.
But that is just not enough time when my dh is gone for work.. between honestly needing more than 2 hrs to wind down after being the only adult.. but also I have a harder time going to sleep with my dh gone so I tend to stay up and make myself tired enough to sleep easily once I get to bed. But I can't do it for too long.. so I'll do that for 3-4 nights and then as soon as the kids are in bed the next time I go to bed myself and get extra sleep that day.. then I can short myself sleep again for several days
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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amyable Forum All-Star
Joined: March 07 2005
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 7:07am | IP Logged
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Take this with a grain of salt, because I *don't* usually go to bed early (when I'd like) because my dh likes me to stay up with him...
I think it was during a conversation with a dear mom on this board, but we realized that maybe the "need" for me time is actually misplaced...we are stressed and wanting time to ourselves, which never seems to be enough... well maybe what we really NEED is the sleep that would restore us and make us NOT stressed and more healthy in mind and body, and not needing half as much "me/unwinding" time. Does that make any sense?
Also, I read about a few studies from years ago that said that TV in the evening/night messes with your melatonin(?) production, making you feel more awake when really your body still needs the sleep. So I think about that too when my emotions are saying "stay up, you're fine!" Really, I'm probably not, and need the sleep!
Hope this made some sense.
__________________ Amy
mom of 5, ages 6-16, and happy wife of
The Highly Sensitive Homeschooler
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Paula in MN Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 25 2006 Location: Minnesota
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 7:20am | IP Logged
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Silly, but it works for me. If I sit down on the couch to read or glance at a favorite show --- I'm asleep in 5 minutes.
__________________ Paula
A Catholic Harvest
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florasita Forum All-Star
Joined: April 06 2007 Location: Canada
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 11:31am | IP Logged
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Nique I get up early and like to go to bed early . my dh is a night owl .
I am not perfect mum . I do my evening dishes in the morning . I am a morning person so any work that is around in evening gets left until morning that is when I do schooling , chores etc. best .
We have older children and once they are older they put themselves to bed about 10pm or earlier depending on the child . Our ds21 Dacotah he always was like his mum he rises early early and goes to bed by 9pm . adventure boy is the same way . Then we've children like Dad who go to bed at 10pm or later and wish to sleep later too when they can .
dh is productive at night he plays his instuments etc. best at night for me I produce best in daylight hrs
I've never been a napper but when I had young ones and would be pregnant I would take the odd nap .
My time alone is always morning . I am just to tired at night to get anything done . dh and I get our alone time either in bed and talk talk talk or we do go out to diner and we even grocery shop together leaving kids home . It is nice having children babysitting age
I also zip out to chapters all alnone Nique . I take off about 10am and get home at noon . I just browse then if I see books I like I sneak off to the quiet section and just sit reading . I rarely buy in store I always purchase a gift card and come home and purchase online items can be up to $10 cheaper !
I have also taken dogs walking or to park alone but I feel guilty going to an open space without kids and usually do pop them in the van too .
All I can say is it does get calmer , it does get quieter and children become far more independent etc.
They do grow up , it really does happen ! hang in there .
Lov Rox
__________________
May I rise & rest with words of Gratitude on my Breath
May I have the Heart & Mind of a Child in my Depth
May I forever remember to be a Light
May Peace Love & Hope be My Sight
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hmbress Forum Pro
Joined: April 19 2007 Location: Maryland
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Posted: Oct 01 2009 at 7:04am | IP Logged
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You know that saying "Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise."? For me it's the other way around: early to rise means early to bed. I like (need!) quiet/alone time in the morning, and purposely get up before the kids to get that. When I stick with that discipline, it also helps me to naturally be tired earlier in the evening.
All that being said however, DH is a night owl and we do like to unwind together in the evening with a TV show. If we start it too late in the evening, I end up staying up later than is ideal. It's a struggle.
__________________ Heather Rose (ds13, ds10)
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PDyer Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 25 2005 Location: Ohio
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Posted: Oct 01 2009 at 7:32am | IP Logged
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Watching this thread with interest. I stayed up way too late reading a book last night...
__________________ Patty
Mom of ds (7/96) and dd (9/01) and two angels (8/95 and 6/08)
Life at Home
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Oct 01 2009 at 9:49am | IP Logged
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Amyable wrote:
that maybe the "need" for me time is actually misplaced...we are stressed and wanting time to ourselves, which never seems to be enough... well maybe what we really NEED is the sleep that would restore us and make us NOT stressed and more healthy in mind and body, and not needing half as much "me/unwinding" time. Does that make any sense?
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That does make sense. But may only be one part.
Because it is also hard to sleep if we don't have some time to unwind. Determining the time needed vs the time wanted though.. that can be tricky.
I know if I'm consistently getting up before 7am even if I'm going to bed early and getting enough sleep, I just stay tired. I'm doing good with a 7am wake time though.
also, I can't switch times by going to bed earlier.. first I have to get up earlier.. maybe for a few days before I'm tired enough to sleep earlier.
Also, if I go to bed too early for my body to sleep, then laying there trying to sleep throws me into an insomniac type of cycle where I actually end up being awake longer than if I stayed up and went to bed sufficiently tired to start with.
Also, how much activity during the day makes a huge difference. When I'm physically active and working hard.. I can go to sleep so much easier than when I'm not.
But I've struggled with these problems since I was little.. I remember laying in bed unable to sleep when I was 7 and younger.
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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violingirl Forum Pro
Joined: Nov 27 2008 Location: Missouri
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Posted: Oct 02 2009 at 9:42am | IP Logged
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For me, it starts with the early rising. If I get up at 7:30 I'm just not as tired in the evening to get to bed on time. So I get up by 6:30, though my 2 year old has decided in the last few weeks that 5:30 is when the day really starts!
I guess I do push that limit a few times a week of staying up until midnight to get a bit more done or have a little extra time for myself, but I also have once or twice a week where I fall asleep within an hour of my boys going to sleep at 8, so I suppose it balances out.
On the nights I need/want to go to sleep before 11 I have to be sure to have the computer and t.v. off by 9:30 and I need to read for a bit to kind of shut my brain down. Otherwise my mind stays full of all the things that have to be done in the next few days and I can't get to sleep.
__________________ Erin
DS (2005) DS (2007) DD (2012)
Mama In Progress
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