| Author | |
ambermelody
Forum Newbie
Joined: June 30 2007
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 39
|
| Posted: July 04 2007 at 11:56pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
Hello wonderful Montessori Mama's!
This is my very first post but have been reading everyone's for a while & am so thrilled to have found this site. Thank you all for being so inspiring! :)
I was wondering how (& why) you each chose to homeschool?
My boys are only 1 & 3, & I don't know exactly what my plans are at the moment. I seem to constantly return to the idea of homeschooling them - but part of me thinks its such a crazy idea too!
A little background: my eldest son started at a Montessori preschool this year (2 days a week) & is thriving. I have started reading everything I can ( and am signed up to Karen's class - again, many thanks for that tip!!) & really love the Montessori philosophy. I have started to implement Montessori elements at home to great success (well, as much success as you can have with a 1 and a 3 year old!  ) & am hoping to expand on our M-at-home with Karen's information. But there are no Montessori primary (elementary) schools close to us for when the boys reach school age. We do however have 2 good Wardorf (Steiner) schools close by & have toyed with the idea of sending them there while doing Montessori at home (out of school hours). I love the "feel" of the WS schools, the artistic strengths & their whole-child focus but find myself a little uncomfortable with the fantasy / Mythology side of things. Montessori justs feels more REAL to me. These schools are private - so expense is an big issue - but they seem more aligned with our ideas on child-raising than the standard state system does (although we do live in a small town & the local public school is a pretty good one). And then... here I am hanging out on a homeschooling website & loving reading about unschooling (which I think is a perfect consept for infants & our little-ones too).
So, you can see that I'm unsure about my direction! 
I would love to hear how you made the BIG decision & how you feel about it still. I don't plan to have more babies & have noticed that a lot of homeschoolers seem to be large families. What about the social isolation for children in small families? What about your own careers & the potential income you miss out on by not being able to work when all of you children are school age...? There are so many questions.
With my warmest regards,
Amber
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
lapazfarm
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 21 2005
Location: Alaska
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 6082
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 12:26am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Hi Amber, and welcome!
People homeschool for many different reasons, so I can only speak for myself as to why.
I homeschool because I love being with my children, guiding them, watching them grow, and learning right along with them. There is no reason that has to end when our children reach the arbitrarily designated "school age" of 5. It is something we do because it is an enormous positive in our lives. Even if the best school in the nation were right next door and free of charge I would still homeschool because we enjoy it so much.
As for the money I would make as a professional if I were not home educating, well, it is a sacrifice. But one that I make with joy, knowing that what I provide by being home with my children is priceless. No amount of extra income could compensate for that.
The myth of homeschool kids being isolated is just that-a myth. My kids get plenty of interaction with other children and people of all ages through the various activities we do. It's not as if we are cloistered away from the world. In fact, I would venture to say my kids are more a part of the world than most children tucked away in a school all day.
Good luck in your journey of discovery. And if you do end up deciding to homeschool, then I think you will find it is a big, wide, wonderful world of home education!
__________________
Theresa
us-schooling in beautiful Fairbanks, Alaska.
LaPaz Home Learning
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
montessori_lori
Forum Pro
Joined: June 06 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 322
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 9:24am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Those are all great questions, Amber! There's no perfect answer and every family is different, but keep in mind that homeschooling isn't an irrevocable decision. In other words, you could try it for a year and then send your kids back to school...kids adjust pretty easily to those changes.
I totally second lapazfarm on the socialization thing - being in a classroom with kids your own age is just one kind of socialization and not necessarily the best kind.
If you do stick with sending your kids to school, a great Montessori school is going to be a wonderful place for them.
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
SeaStar
Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 16 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 9068
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 11:18am | IP Logged
|
|
|
I know we've all had these same questions, Amber- and sometimes you just find the answers as you go along.
My ds had such separation anxiety as even a newborn that we knew we would look into homeschooling. Then came along dd, who has so many food allergies that the allergist told us not to leave her anywhere. So we began to research homeschooling, and the more we learned the more convinced we have become that we need to do this, taking it one day at at time.
As far as socialization, I worry about that as well. But God has been good always to send us friends- maybe not as many as kids in regular school, but how many good friends do you need? Also- being at home we don't see so much of the negative things that kids pick up at school, which is a blessing.
__________________
Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
earthmaven
Forum Pro
Joined: June 19 2007
Location: Illinois
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 105
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 11:24am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Hi Amber,
Welcome! Like you, we sent our oldest to a Montessori preschool and felt it was wonderful for her. We moved away before our younger daughter could attend, but she's so happy here at home with her big sister and me that I think it has worked out really well for everyone.
The reasons we decided to homeschool...they're as different and as similar as most other families, I suppose. My school years don't exactly conjure up memories of undiluted pleasure (university aside), so a great deal of my early interest in homeschooling was informed by a desire to spare my children those kinds of negative experiences. My husband was primarily homeschooled as a result of frequent international moves and he has one of the most wonderful and encompassing approaches to learning I've ever seen. I'd like for our children to approach life and learning with that same mixture of fascination, open-mindedness and enthusiasm. And frankly, I really love hanging out with my children, following their interests and learning alongside them. They're wonderful company and are genuinely happy and stimulated learning with me and their father as their guides.
FWIW, without going into a full comparative analysis of Waldorf "versus" Montessori (there are lots of those on the web from a variety of perspectives), I can offer our impressions as a family that compared both approaches by visiting a number of schools.
You're right that there's a lovely, cozy feeling in the Waldorf schools...bread baking, silk scarf-draped treehouses...all very pretty. But we bake bread at home and my children engage in imaginative play whenever they want. We even have the silk scarves, so I had trouble seeing how Waldorf justified the expense! Our daughter was also an early reader who would have been kept in kindergarten for 3 years because of when her birthday fell. At least at our Waldorf, reading wasn't stressed until 2nd grade and I never felt I got a satisfactory answer on what my daughter (and other early readers) would be doing while the others were receiving reading instruction.
Something we noticed in the higher grades (and this may well vary from school to school)...all of the paintings on display throughout the entire school were watercolour landscapes done using a wet-on-wet technique that seemed designed to tie in with the dreamy, kind of "gaia" atmosphere. I didn't see one renegade painting on those walls. Where are the works done by the child/ren who wanted to do something else? We've seen this in so many schools...everyone does a self-portrait or a copy of Monet's water lilies. As an artist, I'm all for introducing children to new media and techniques and then stepping back to see what they create with them. It's awe-inspiring and the children are truly proud of what they did themselves. It just gave me an uncomfortable feeling when I didn't see that spirit of innovation and discovery being embraced and encouraged.
A couple of other issues for us were that the foreign language was German only (no offense to those who speak it, I just would have liked to see some French on offer) and the instrument was violin (again, I love the violin, but what if it wasn't my daughter's passion?). So we found ourselves concerned about the lack of choice and the inherent need to conform, which is one of the freedoms I most cherish about homeschooling. I feel that a Montessori approach within our homeschooling environment supports the spirit of inquiry and discovery and the sheer love of learning that we want to cultivate in our girls.
Well, that's way longer than I intended and I should probably go investigate why it's so quiet in my house right now...
Warmest regards,
Tracy
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JuliaT
Forum All-Star
Joined: June 25 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 563
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 3:43pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Welcome, Amber. This is the best place to learn about homeschooling as well as the various ways to homeschool.
For our family, we knew before we even had children that we were going to homeschool. I was a daycare teacher in my other life (before kids)and I had a peak into the world of public school. I didn't like what I saw. Also, my dh had heard horror stories about our local school from friends and he knew that he didn't want our chilren going there. We do not have access to any Montessori schools in our area.
Also, my dd learned how to do many academic things at an early age. I knew that she would be bored at school. By the same token, my ds needs alot of help and guidance with his learning. I knew that he would fall through the cracks at school and that I would end up teaching him anyway. I figured that I might as well teach him during the hours that suited me.
AS far as my career and loss of income goes, I consider raising and homeschooling my children my career. No, I don't get paid monetarily, but I do get paid by seeing my children 's happiness and by their love of learning.
I worked for many years before I had children. I loved my job, but I hated the actual concept of working. I am a home body. I love being home with my children. It is the most natural thing for me. Yes, it would be nice to have some extra money, but we do just fine without it. God has taken care of us the last 8 yrs. He has always provided for us. I trust Him to continue in that care.
Blessings,
Julia
mom to 3 (8,6,4)
http://www.homeschoolbogger.com/Juliainsk
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mackfam
Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006
Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 14656
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 6:01pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Hi Amber, welcome!
My reasons for homeschooling are varied, most are the common ones you've already heard expressed, and the same reasons you now feel the pull. But every day, I make the decision again to continue. We began because it was just a natural extension of what we were already doing with our children. Our children have never been to away school, so every step of homeschooling has just been another natural extension. I loved being with my children. I still do. I love knowing their hearts. I love that they come to me and share the most exciting experiences of their day - that of finding the first butterfly on the butterfly bush, or of identifying a beautiful piece of art that they recognized, or reading a cherished book. There are too many reasons, too many gifts to list for why I still love the opportunity to homeschool. In the end its really all about being with your children and loving the learning together.
I wouldn't trade our learning time together for anything. Certainly, in all things worthwhile, sacrifices must be made. You and your husband will have to decide if those sacrifices are worthwhile for your family.
Others have already spoken about the socialization myth - so I won't beat that dead horse!
Homeschooling is a gift, a treasure, a vocation, and a very real challenge! My mother told me that the only thing required to homeschool was commitment! I believed her then, and I've lived it to some degree now. Homeschooling days are usually lovely and filled with grace, but I do want to offer a moment of realism - there are certainly the days that you doubt, wonder if you shouldn't throw in the towel, and are frantically thumbing through the phone book for the number of the big yellow bus to come pick them up. There are those days! Your dh is your biggest treasure during those times - for while you are the heart of the home, he is the head, and can often cut right through any emotional distractions and offer sound wisdom and guidance involving deep breaths, copious amounts of chocolate, and a nice glass of wine.
One of the biggest benefits of homeschooling is that you can pick and choose the best! Why not have a hands on home with beautiful art and lots of imaginative play? Who wouldn't love that! That is exactly the kind of home learning atmosphere I'm going for.
Hope some of these thoughts help! Have confidence in your ability to learn right alongside your children, and know that you will make mistakes if you choose to homeschool, these are not the end of the world! They simply serve to awaken you to a new need that needs to be addressed.
God Bless you.
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
ambermelody
Forum Newbie
Joined: June 30 2007
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 39
|
| Posted: July 05 2007 at 11:54pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Wow!, I'm so thrilled to have received so much response to my Q already. Your thoughts & insights are wonderful & I must say I actually teared up at one stage reading them. It's great that I'll be able to show your replies to my DH so he can read them too.
I do feel like we are already a "little learning team" - just as Teresa said - "There is no reason that has to end when our children reach the arbitrarily designated "school age" of 5." (sorry, haven't got the hang of the quotes yet!) & I am thrilled at the thought of strengthening that commitment to learning together.
Along the socialisation train of thought - I totally agree that a large group of same-age children isn't the best option, I guess I was just thinking that without a bunch of extra brothers and sisters maybe my boys wouldn't be able to experience the communal feel that Maria Montessori imagined, with different clusters of kids working on projects together.
And I forgot to ask you about how you find time for yourselves? I'm sure as your children grow up life becomes less "hands on" but that's where we are right now & I'd love to know how you balance homeschooling & some peaceful time for yourself.
Also - do your children do any/many activities out of the home (music lessons, organised sport etc)?
Must stop with these question extensions & go & look at my printouts from karen while the little guys is sleeping.
Thanks again for making me feel so welcome here & for sharing your experiences so honestly. It's beautiful,
Amber
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Meredith
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 08 2005
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2355
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 10:51am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Amber a grea big welcome here a little late, just returning from a week away for the 4th! Whew, you've received so many great replies here I also won't beat the dead horse, but you have found a treasure trove of insight even in just the Montessori forum. There are probably some wonderful threads in the Real Learning forum that would also be helpful for you!
We have home schooled since the beginning (7 years to date) and for many of the same reasons as the other wonderful ladies here have already mentioned. Our learning environment has evolved into much more Montessori and Real Learning over the years with much Charlotte Mason influence as it's such a wonderful fit for our family!
I hope you enjoy your time here and thank you so much for introducing yourself here 
Blessings!
__________________
Meredith
Mom of 4 Sweeties
Sweetness and Light
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mackfam
Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006
Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 14656
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 12:51pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Amber,
Mine is a life of service with joy. I simply enjoy serving my family. I carve creative spots out of the day to meet my needs which I try to keep simple. A general routine helps the children understand where your needs fit in to that routine.
I try to make certain I spend time alone in prayer in the mornings, and then I bring the children in for our morning prayers all together. Some mothers are able to get up earlier than their children to achieve some quiet alone time, unfortunately my kids get up at 5:30 already, so we're all up together! I solve this problem by designating a rocking chair in my kitchen as my "prayer chair." When the kids see me sitting there in the morning, I'm to be left alone unless someone is bleeding. They respect this. I got the original idea when reading about a mother of a large family who would pull her apron over her head when she was in prayer, when the kids saw her like that, they knew not to disturb her. I wish I remembered where I read that so I could give credit, but I don't. If I neglect morning prayer, my day quickly unravels and charity and patience with my children are the first things to go.
The second routine we've established as a family is bedtime at 8pm for all children - period. Our 10yo is certainly old enough to stay up later. We allow her to read in bed as late as she likes, but my dh and I find that the busier our lives become, and the more demands the children place on us during the day, the more we need to guard that special time for just the two of us. We don't always spend that time in deep philosophical conversation - hardly if you knew my dh.  But, we do talk about challenges we face, sometimes we watch a movie, or I might read while he watches something, but we're together, and this time has become very important to us. When life becomes particularly stressful, I long for the after 8 hours because I know I can let my guard down and reveal whatever raw emotions I am feeling in the protected environment of my home and in front of my fiercest protector.
I try to keep my physical needs simple. I don't like to be away. Sometimes though, if I feel I really need a quiet break, perhaps in Adoration, or maybe just a trip to the grocery store without tag-alongs, my dh volunteers and watches the kids while I am gone for the little while. I find that the time away is refreshing, but always leaves me longing to be right back home among my family.
Oh, that's right, you asked about outside activities. Well, we do have a few outside activities. My dd takes horseback riding lessons once a week. We (may) participate in a homeschool co-op that meets once a week again this year.
There are so many wonderful things to do together as you homeschool your dc. You do have to be careful not to choose so many that you lose the quiet simplicity of a homeschool day spent at home. This is perhaps one of the easiest pitfalls a homeschooler can fall into. Ask me how I know. If I find I've lost the family peace, that is generally a sign to me that I need to put on the brakes, slow down a bit and reassess what is important to do outside the home. I have painfully cut activities before. This is an area that needs constant monitoring, and often dad is the first to suspect that a change needs to happen - his dinner is never prepared, the children are whiny and demanding, and mom is overburdened and stressed about drowning in a sea of "to-do's." Take advantage of some of the excellent opportunities available to homeschool families, but don't let them intrude on your peace!
Hope this helps. 
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
DominaCaeli
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 3711
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 1:01pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Mackfam wrote:
When life becomes particularly stressful, I long for the after 8 hours because I know I can let my guard down and reveal whatever raw emotions I am feeling in the protected environment of my home and in front of my fiercest protector.
|
|
|
Jennifer, your whole post was wonderful but this line is particularly lovely. Thank you so much for sharing.
__________________
Blessings,
Celeste
Joyous Lessons
Mommy to six: three boys (8, 4, newborn) and four girls (7, 5, 2, and 1)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mackfam
Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006
Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 14656
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 1:17pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Oh you're so welcome Celeste  I'm happy if it was helpful to you in any way.
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Meredith
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 08 2005
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2355
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 4:10pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
ambermelody wrote:
| ...I guess I was just thinking that without a bunch of extra brothers and sisters maybe my boys wouldn't be able to experience the communal feel that Maria Montessori imagined, with different clusters of kids working on projects together. |
|
|
I think you'll find that they will actually benefit each other when working together and in your observation process with them, you'll know when they need to do work separately. Mine all enjoy helping each other with many projects and tasks related to our learning, but there are definately times when individual work time is the best for each one of them.
ambermelody wrote:
And I forgot to ask you about how you find time for yourselves? I'm sure as your children grow up life becomes less "hands on" but that's where we are right now & I'd love to know how you balance homeschooling & some peaceful time for yourself.
Also - do your children do any/many activities out of the home (music lessons, organised sport etc)?
|
|
|
We also limit outside activites as they are just that, and can rapidly deteriorate the *home* atmosphere. I'm not much of a car-schooler, but in some circumstances it has to work for some families. We have found our niche in just the right amount of action for the older children and the littler two come along for the ride right now. They will have their time in a few more years, but they are receiving the benefit of their older sibling's activities with enriching music from our pianist son and performances from our ballet dancing daughter. As for ME  I have a dh who knows when I need that break WE also have our evening times together usually over a later dinner if he's been on the road, or after all the dc are in bed. I totally agree with Jennifer in that you have to *guard* that time very carefully. We do not have access to babysitters right now so a date is an outside walk around the yard with a glass of wine while the kids ride their bikes or play together. You just make it work.
Prayer time for me happens all throughout the day. I start in the shower, sometimes it's a hymn or two, then a decade of the rosary. The children and I have our own devotional prayer time in the morning after breakfast and then the Angelus at lunch with grace and we pray a family rosary at night after dinner, or sometimes the St. Joseph or Divine Mercy Chaplet. I am trusting in God and my Guardian Angels to cover me in prayer when I don't get to finish them due to interuptions by the dc, as it happens inevitably.
Great questions, always gets me thinking about the priorities, and with home education, we have so many choices, it's nice to break it down to what's truly important!! HTH, somewhat in your discernment, and so glad to have you here!
Blessings!
__________________
Meredith
Mom of 4 Sweeties
Sweetness and Light
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
ambermelody
Forum Newbie
Joined: June 30 2007
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 39
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 5:57pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Thank you for your further reponses Meredith & Jennifer . I was very interested in your thoughts on outside activities... I can see what you mean about them actually being a distraction to the atmosphere you are creating in the home.
One of the things I'm loving at the moment is that in trying to follow a more Montessori homelife we have simplified a lot of things (packed up most of the *plastic toys * & commercial 'character' toys+books+clothes/ starting working in collaboration on the daily tasks instead of trying to find something to 'entertain' the boys while I do all of the cleaning etc / being more aware of the natural environment around us / Not watching TV - I was actually only trying for TV minimisation but after a little while my eldest stopped asking to watch it! ) & finding our days more interesting & fulfilling. My DH comments on it almost every evening which is very sweet. Anyway, I digress... I have always tried to plan an outing most mornings (& granted - we still need some some as to not get cabin fever!) but I want to start to focus on bringing all the wonderful things we have right under our noses to life!
My exciting news is that I had a great talk with DH last night & he is 100% behind me if I want to homeschool. I feel very blessed, because I can only begin to imagine how hard it would be if you didn't have that support. I'm so very excited!!!
Amber
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Meredith
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 08 2005
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2355
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 6:13pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
ambermelody wrote:
Thank you for your further reponses Meredith & Jennifer . I was very interested in your thoughts on outside activities... I can see what you mean about them actually being a distraction to the atmosphere you are creating in the home....
My exciting news is that I had a great talk with DH last night & he is 100% behind me if I want to homeschool. I feel very blessed, because I can only begin to imagine how hard it would be if you didn't have that support. I'm so very excited!!!
Amber |
|
|
Amber, you are more than welcome, and how exciting for you, what a blessing you dh is, you will treasure that support, trust me Congratulations and welcome to a world of possibilites
__________________
Meredith
Mom of 4 Sweeties
Sweetness and Light
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mackfam
Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006
Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 14656
|
| Posted: July 06 2007 at 6:40pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Amber - I'm so glad we could help! What an exciting time for you, and you're right, homeschooling without your dh's support could be disastrous. Meredith is right, your dh is a blessing! Enjoy this wonderful time! You have already made some wonderful changes for the good in your home environment, and the rewards you will reap for these changes will be far reaching. A "real learning" home life is such a blessing for the entire family, and you are already experiencing those sweet joys. I'm excited for you, truly! These are sweet moments!
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
4Real Forums : Nurturing the Years of Wonder
Topic: How you came to Homeschool...
