| Author | |
SeaStar
Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 16 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 9068
|
| Posted: June 02 2007 at 5:15pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
I have this problem at my house:
Every time I introduce a new material, the kids get really excited. The learning materials have a "fun toy" feeling for them, I guess. They each want to be first to use it, have it to "themselves", etc. Ds, especially, tends to be very possessive and gets upset if he can't "go first". It's a good opportunity to learn to share, but, also- as I introduce new things, it feels like Christmas or a birthday all the time around here. I have made and purchased several new items lately, and now I'm wondering if I'm bringing in too many new things too often?
We just did the magnifying tray with a brand new magnifying glass I bought at a learning store. It works so much better than the old one we had. The kids love it. But again, it all has that "I got a new toy" feeling. I'm so happy the kids are so excited to learn, but at the same time I have that nagging feeling of : is this spoiling them? Overwhelming them with new possessions all the time?
I bought a neat "rocks of the world" collection at TJ Maxx, I bought the wood chips at Lowe's (great suggestion, BTW) to make a collection with, I have bought several items to put together a tray for exploring magnets.
Maybe it is Christmas all the time here. Maybe that is part of the Montessori magic.
__________________
Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
lapazfarm
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 21 2005
Location: Alaska
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 6082
|
| Posted: June 02 2007 at 5:50pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I think it may be part of the magic. I hope the appeal of these activities never wears off!
But to help with the squabbling, perhaps ypu could set a timer for the more popular new items, and once it goes off the child has to move on to something else. Then once everyone who wants to has had their turn, the first child could set it again for another turn?
__________________
Theresa
us-schooling in beautiful Fairbanks, Alaska.
LaPaz Home Learning
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
CathinCoffeland
Forum Pro
Joined: May 19 2006
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 367
|
| Posted: June 02 2007 at 11:20pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
is this spoiling them? Overwhelming them with new possessions all the time?
Melinda- I have been wondering the same thing plus I hear from dh a lot "more stuff?" "where is that going to go?" and "what are you printing now" 
Maggie
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Kristin
Forum Pro
Joined: April 03 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 317
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 12:59pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
IT FEELS LIKE CHRISTMAS OR A BIRTHDAY ALL THE TIME AROUND HERE ... IS THIS SPOILING THEM / OVERWHELMING THEM WITH NEW POSSESSIONS ALL THE TIME?
Oh how well I relate to this concern, Melinda! It is challenging because if our children were in a school somewhere they would be given opportunities to work with new and different materials all of the time but in a home schooling situation, these materials of necessity become like "possessions". One way I look at it that helps to put me at ease is that these items are "on loan". Even though they are ours now, I plan on reselling them later and getting a good bit of money back out of them.
Also, there is a definite balance to bringing in new things and being sure to use the things we already have to the fullest. When we're not in balance this way, I end up with a "junk food feeling". We gobble everything up but it gives no lasting nutrition or value, leaving us full but unsatisfied. Does this make any sense?
I THINK IT MAY BE PART OF THE MAGIC. I HOPE THE APPEAL OF THESE ACTIVITIES NEVER WEARS OFF!
The great thing about the Montessori materials is that they do have a lasting attraction about them. Maria Montessori put them to the test in her "Casa" and those which the children did not return to time and again were simply done away with. Maybe that can give you some peace knowing that these are not merely "toys" . I think that the key to not "overdosing" is being sure to strike a balance between the periods of influx and the periods where we simply get good, in-depth use out of the things we already have. My internal sense, based on personal experience with this challenge, is that probably a 20-80 (new-familiar) ratio is about right.
THEY EACH WANT TO BE FIRST TO USE IT, HAVE IT TO "THEMSELVES", ETC. DS, ESPECIALLY, TENDS TO BE VERY POSSESSIVE AND GETS UPSET IF HE CAN'T GO FIRST.
I'm sure that this is a challenge faced in Montessori schools: a new presentation is given and everyone wants to do it at the same time! I wonder how is it managed there? There's no doubt that it's beneficial to learn to wait one's turn, so you can take heart that your children are being given this particular opportunity to learn it!
We've also had experience with this type of struggle. One of our challenges is that our son often wants to be doing what his little sister is doing. But I've found that if there are enough other works of interest available for him to get immersed in the problem isn't nearly as challenging.
This is what I would probably do if we were in your situation: discuss it with the children, let them identify the problem and come up with a solution. One possible solution would be to alternate who gets to use the work first after you give a group presentation on a new material.
If the person who has to wait continues to really struggle with this arrangement, I would ask them what they think would help them to be more patient in their waiting. One idea you could suggest would be having the person who is not "first" choose a work that they are interested in doing BEFORE I give the presentation and put it on the table or rug so it is waiting for them when they return to it. This would give them something productive to focus on and hopefully they will be able to enter into a period of concentration with whatever it is they have chosen to do, not merely performing actions as they wait for the other person to finish with the "coveted" work. If the child continues to really struggle with getting his/her mind off of the "new work", I would probably have him go to another area altogether and maybe read a book or do a read aloud. My guess is that this would only happen once or the child might actually identify that it is a helpful technique for self distraction and call upon it in times of "trouble".
One last note on this subject, I believe it would be in keeping with Montessori principles to allow the person with the first turn to work as long as they want to with the new material, provided they are really interested in it and are not merely repeating so as to keep the other from using it! KWIM?
I look forward to hearing other people's ideas on this because it will probably be something we come face to face with ourselves in the future!
Good luck to you and keep up to good work!
__________________
Bunch 'o Honey to my Honey Bunch and Mama to five - Noah 10y  , Rose 8y  , Dominic 2.5 y  , Oliver 16m 
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Kristin
Forum Pro
Joined: April 03 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 317
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 1:03pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Maggie, you made me laugh when you said you often hear from your husband, "more stuff?" "where is that going to go?" and "what are you printing now"?! We must be leading parallel lives!
__________________
Bunch 'o Honey to my Honey Bunch and Mama to five - Noah 10y , Rose 8y , Dominic 2.5 y , Oliver 16m
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
SeaStar
Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 16 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 9068
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 1:14pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Thanks for all your thoughts. Sometimes I feel like I am emptying the ocean with a teaspoon trying to recreate a Montessori environment at home. All those great learning materials- can we have them all? Should we? Is this an impossible task?
But then I think that our children at home have access to all the materials all the time, not just during school hours, so, in a way, they can truly learn with them to their hearts content. That is a big plus.
__________________
Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Kristin
Forum Pro
Joined: April 03 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 317
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 1:53pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I AM EMPTYING THE OCEAN WITH A TEASPOON TRYING TO RECREATE A MONTESSORI ENVIRONMENT AT HOME.
Well said, Melinda!
ALL THOSE GREAT LEARNING MATERIALS - CAN WE HAVE THEM ALL? SHOULD WE? IS THIS AN IMPOSSIBLE TASK?
I have the same questions. Montessori is a perfect fit for home environment but at the same time an absolutely not-so-perfect fit! Argh!!!  
__________________
Bunch 'o Honey to my Honey Bunch and Mama to five - Noah 10y , Rose 8y , Dominic 2.5 y , Oliver 16m
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JennGM
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 17702
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 4:50pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Kristin wrote:
SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I AM EMPTYING THE OCEAN WITH A TEASPOON TRYING TO RECREATE A MONTESSORI ENVIRONMENT AT HOME.
Well said, Melinda!
ALL THOSE GREAT LEARNING MATERIALS - CAN WE HAVE THEM ALL? SHOULD WE? IS THIS AN IMPOSSIBLE TASK?
I have the same questions. Montessori is a perfect fit for home environment but at the same time an absolutely not-so-perfect fit! Argh!!! |
|
|
I've been doing a little pondering myself, and pulled out Elizabeth's Real Learning last night. Her mention of Montessori is so balanced. See p. 27 for all in context, but her thoughts are wonderful on creating an atmosphere:
...Many preschool and kindergarten classrooms in the United States endeavor to create the perfect "child-centered" atmosphere where everything is artificially arranged for the child. They have been heavily influenced by the work of Maria Montessori. We don't need to re-create kindergartens in our homes. While we certainly want homes where the child is comfortable and welcome, children thrive in "real" homes where adults and children both live.
We can borrow from much of Maria Montessori's thought as we design our own philosophy of education. We can look to provide beautiful, natural high-quality playthings for our children, but we need not embrace the entire Montessori program in our homes, or duplicate the very specific, expensive materials. At Home with Montessori by Patricia Oriti is a lovely illustrated little book that makes the Montessori approach to environment a practical one at home. This book is entirely compatible with Charlotte Mason. However, in an effort to provide the very best of all that is available, don't limit your thought on atmosphere to Maria Montessori. Look to Charlotte Mason as well. Atmosphere is so much more than furniture arrangement and accessibility of supplies.
One of my personal struggles with Montessori is that it doesn't come naturally or instinctively to a parent. And shouldn't it be more natural for us since we are the primary educators of our children?
The materials are either expensive or require time consuming to present. Initially it was meant for underprivileged children, but now it has become a status symbol and expensive. Not that we are doing that in our homes, just some of my interior struggles. I'm not anti-Montessori, as I'm trying to set up our own place in our home...
__________________
Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mackfam
Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006
Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 14656
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 6:06pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Jenn -
I share your concerns. I wish I had the Patricia Oriti book. Mine is a practical approach to Montessori, but I also readily admit to being somewhat ignorant of a true Montessori classroom. My personal philosophy has always been in line with St. Paul, Charlotte Mason, Elizabeth, and I think Maria Montessori - Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
Virtue is always in the middle. I don't think Montessori is an exception here. We choose what works for our family. I want to try to apply solid Montessori principles in teaching/presenting. I'll read, and research. Moira points out in her manuals that in order for the presentations to be effective, they must be organic. I want that same organic quality for Montessori in our learning environment.
I want the beautiful things to be available. But, I don't want to be a slave to them either. I'm struggling with you. I really do love the Montessori philosophy because I think it is in line with "living learning" - it appeals to us because it is beauty and splendor in the ordinary - bringing order to chaos (ok, well...trying  .) I didn't order the golden beads - though they greatly intrigued me - because I just didn't "get it." I decided that to use something in my home, I at least needed to have some sort of basic understanding of the material. Some things were very straightforward - the cylinders, the puzzles, the rods, the number boards (addition, etc.) I went in that direction.
Don't know if this is any help at all to you - I'm curious to see where you end up on all of this. I think your points are valid, and I appreciate hearing them - they echo many of the same sentiments I have.
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Meredith
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 08 2005
Location: N/A
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2355
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 6:53pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
JennGM wrote:
One of my personal struggles with Montessori is that it doesn't come naturally or instinctively to a parent. And shouldn't it be more natural for us since we are the primary educators of our children?
I'm not anti-Montessori, as I'm trying to set up our own place in our home... |
|
|
These are all excellent points Jenn and so timely as I was just referring to Elizabeth's great posts on Montessori learning in her home posted at her blog. I know we will never go *total* Montssori as it just isn't practical for us, not only in the monetary sense but in the sense that I do not want to re-create a Montessori classroom in my home anymore than I do not want to re-create any other sort of classroom into our home, that just isn't REAL!
For us there is the draw to the nice materials and the *order* and peace of the Montessori method that I want to instill in my dc, much like I already have with the Charlotte Mason lifestyle of learning that we love. There isn't a lot of difference in the atmosphere concepts IMHO.
With Montessori I really think you have to go with your *gut*. For us it's a sure fit right now as my littlest ones are so ripe for the presentations and the materials will span several years, so I'm confident they will benefit from it as well. I would never give up my Charlottte Mason Term that I did with Violet this past year in favor of Montessori as she is at the tail end of Montessori at 11 years old. But my other three at 8.5, 5, and 2 are so receptive to Montessori and along with Living Books we're pretty well covered!
I hope this is helpful and not too rambly...stay tuned for an exciting new topic to come...
__________________
Meredith
Mom of 4 Sweeties
Sweetness and Light
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
SeaStar
Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 16 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 9068
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 6:53pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Thanks for the reminder about the passage in Real Learning. I remember that when I was reading it for the first time and came across that passage I thought: Whew! I don't have to recreate a Montessori school at home. What a relief!
I struggle in that there are aspects of both Charlotte Mason and Montessori that I love and want to incorporate at home. Maybe what I am truly after is "Montessori-inspired Real Learning."
All the beautiful (and expensive) Montessori materials are wonderful- and wouldn't I love to have them all - but what I love even more is the whole philosophy- teaching independence, bestowing dignity, allowing the children to learn and have access to wonderful materials.
I don't "get" the golden beads, either, and all the catalog pictures of chains hanging around- I'm not sure that is right for us, either.
But one day at a time, right? And lots of praying.
__________________
Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
SQUILT Music Appreciation
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Cheryl
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 20 2005
Location: Massachusetts
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 978
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 7:32pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
JennGM wrote:
One of my personal struggles with Montessori is that it doesn't come naturally or instinctively to a parent. And shouldn't it be more natural for us since we are the primary educators of our children?
|
|
|
This is one of my concerns also. Moira's presentations have not come naturally to me. I don't like presenting things. If I homeschooled according to my preference, I'd probably be using Sonlight. I love to read aloud with my children. It's no doubt my favorite part of homeschooling. But then I think I need to consider my dc's preferences too. I think my two middle dc would really enjoy working with Montessori materials. I may be hoping for a way to keep them challenged and fulfilled as I work with my ds 8 or take care of my toddler, I don't know.
One thing I consider when I am doubting that Montessori is right for my family, is that I did practically nothing that required time and effort on my part with my firstborn and he seems to have turned out well so far. We read aloud, did art projects, baked, took walks around the neighborhood and spent lots of time working in the yard. I thought Montessori was the name of a preschool.
Why am I attracted to it now? Maybe because my days are chaotic and I want them to be more orderly. I'd like ds 6 to be normalized, if possible. I feel like he would particularly benefit in having choices within limits. Of course, Montessori is not the only way to achieve this. I'm getting way off-topic here. I should have posted this in the pros and cons thread. I'm loving all these threads!!! 
__________________
Cheryl
Wife to Bob ('97)
Mom to Matthew 13, Joseph 11, Sarah 10, Rachel 6, Hannah almost 4 and Mary 1
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
SuzanneG
Forum Moderator
Joined: June 17 2006
Location: Idaho
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5465
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 7:53pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
This should prob go in pros and cons thread, but I'm just following up on a few of Cheryl's and Jenn's comments.
I did a bit of Montes with my oldest, and then more babies, and then "unschooling" happened by default, but I'm so glad it did, as I have found so much can be learned this way.
The presentation concept doesn't come naturally to me either, although, I LOVE it when it takes on a life of its own and I realize why these presentations are so special.
I gravitate toward CM and unschooling mostly...(but who knows....) but I've found the same thing as Cheryl....I need a bit more order, independence and direction, so I"m finding myself longing for a few of the concepts about Montessori, esp for the youngers.
Also, the presentations and reminder to observe my dc help me to enter a bit into their world. Instead of being focused on the craziness of the day and what needs to get done next. It's another way to "be with them" just like a wonderful read-aloud or a few great hours spent outside or a crazy rabbit-trail that we follow.
It's also been a wake-up-call to me to find great learning things for my 3-year-old instead of lumping her in and expecting her to be with her older sisters.
__________________
Suzanne in ID
Wife to Pete
Mom of 7 (Girls - 14, 12, 11, 9, 7 and Boys - 4, 1)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
lapazfarm
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 21 2005
Location: Alaska
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 6082
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 8:14pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
One of the things that attracts me to Montessori is the idea that it fits so well with the CM idea of short, 15 min lessons, followed by letting the child have time alone to play with and ponder the ideas on her own. I think of the presentations as those short lessons.
I don't "present" naturally either, but neither do I lecture, or dictate, or teach from a text, recite poetry or do picture study naturally!LOL! I think the only method that does come naturally to me is projects. And reading aloud.And this works perfectly for ds. But dd just is not ready for projects yet, so in the mean time, Montessori it is.
I think Elizabeth's take on adapting Montessori to the home is right on. Like any other method, CM included, we take what works for us and leave the rest behind. I will never be a strict Montessorian, or a strict anything else, for that matter. The materials and the method are tools, a means to an end, and nothing more. I will use them as I please. But like any tool, I think it is a good idea to read the instruction manual and figure out how it is meant to be used before striking out on ones own and modifying. So this is what I am up to now, the stage I am at. I want to figure out how it is designed to be used. Then I can begin to tweak all I want.
__________________
Theresa
us-schooling in beautiful Fairbanks, Alaska.
LaPaz Home Learning
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Kristin
Forum Pro
Joined: April 03 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 317
|
| Posted: June 04 2007 at 11:15pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
It is very helpful to get differing viewpoints on this topic; good food for thought and prayerful reflection. Thanks!
__________________
Bunch 'o Honey to my Honey Bunch and Mama to five - Noah 10y , Rose 8y , Dominic 2.5 y , Oliver 16m
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Angel
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 22 2006
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2293
|
| Posted: June 05 2007 at 4:32pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
lapazfarm wrote:
One of the things that attracts me to Montessori is the idea that it fits so well with the CM idea of short, 15 min lessons, followed by letting the child have time alone to play with and ponder the ideas on her own. I think of the presentations as those short lessons.
I don't "present" naturally either, but neither do I lecture, or dictate, or teach from a text, recite poetry or do picture study naturally!LOL! I think the only method that does come naturally to me is projects. And reading aloud.And this works perfectly for ds. But dd just is not ready for projects yet, so in the mean time, Montessori it is.
I think Elizabeth's take on adapting Montessori to the home is right on. Like any other method, CM included, we take what works for us and leave the rest behind. I will never be a strict Montessorian, or a strict anything else, for that matter. The materials and the method are tools, a means to an end, and nothing more. I will use them as I please. But like any tool, I think it is a good idea to read the instruction manual and figure out how it is meant to be used before striking out on ones own and modifying. So this is what I am up to now, the stage I am at. I want to figure out how it is designed to be used. Then I can begin to tweak all I want. |
|
|
This is how I feel about it, too. To be honest, I get and enjoy presenting -- probably I'm not doing it the way a Montessori trained teacher would, but really I tend to think of it as just sitting down and showing my kids how to do something. If I've read in a manual the instructions for use of the materials, then I can sit down with my kids and we can work with the material. Honestly I think is much less weird than, say, the scripted nature of some homeschool curricula like 100 Easy Lessons or Saxon Math 3. I cannot follow those scripts to save my life. But the Montessori presentation offers enough leeway that it seems useful to me. I don't do it in a scripted fashion, because that would be weird, both for me and my kids. But if I have internalized it, used the material myself, understood it, then I can be a lot more natural in what I'm doing. (It's when I try to wing it completely that I stumble and feel as if things aren't working.)
My biggest problem is the environment. I am constantly reminding myself not to get too discouraged, because we live in a house not a school! The Montessori school, particularly in the 3-6 age range, is meant to recreate the home as nearly as possible. Because it is a controlled simulation of a home, certain things are possible in the environment of the school which would not make much sense in the context of an actual home. The problem is that so much of what is written about Montessori is geared to the school and not for the home, and we homeschoolers are left trying to figure out what's really important? What should be included and what should be left out? I think it's like anything else: every family is unique. The actual mix of methods I use in my house will probably not work in your house because your kids are different than mine. So, as homeschoolers -- particularly as the kind of homeschoolers who are not using canned curricula -- we can kind feel like we're groping along in the dark a lot of the time... or at least like we're conducting one enormous experiment. 
I was initially attracted to Montessori because of the calm and order the books promised, particularly as it applied to my oldest. What I found was that my oldest needs a little more structure, but that the method resonates with my other kids. I think more than the materials, presentations, or environment what has contributed most to our learning environment/methods is the concept of "freedom within limits". This concept has given me a framework to structure our learning while allowing the kids to follow their interests... which is what we've always wanted from homeschooling. Unschooling did not really work for us, but neither does any kind of top-down approach in which I make all the assignments. Montessori is kind of a middle ground, and it allows my hands-on learners and little people to learn the way they learn best.
--Angela
Three Plus Two
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
lapazfarm
Forum All-Star
Joined: July 21 2005
Location: Alaska
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 6082
|
| Posted: June 05 2007 at 5:53pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Very well put, Angela.
__________________
Theresa
us-schooling in beautiful Fairbanks, Alaska.
LaPaz Home Learning
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
4Real Forums : Nurturing the Years of Wonder
Topic: New materials problem
