Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: Houses/fitting everyone in/Moving Post ReplyPost New Topic
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MarilynW
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Posted: Sept 05 2006 at 9:00pm | IP Logged Quote MarilynW

Hi - I would really like to hear how you make home decisions. We are starting to get very cosy in our house - but moving in Northern Virginia is not an option - too expensive. There are so many advantages to staying where we are - my husband works 15 minutes away (priceless!!!), my parents are a half hour away and there are many opportunities for my kids to take part in the sports they love. I have our older and not very big house organized and decluttered and a beautiful space for us - but it is starting to get very tight.

How do those of you with lots of kids and smaller houses manage? And for those of you who have moved to more rural areas with more affordable and family friendly housing - how do you decide where to move and how do your husbands manage for jobs?

We have been praying for a while - and our decision is to stay where we are for now. Maybe the advantages of staying where we are in a smaller house will totally outweigh the desire to move to a bigger house and more green spaces.

I get the "dreaming up my ideal home" phases - but after spending the day reading and researching all about Blessed Teresa of Calcutta with the kids, I feel a little guilty about wanting more.

Blessings

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Posted: Sept 06 2006 at 8:48am | IP Logged Quote mrsgranola

Marilyn, this is not an easy quandry, for sure. Although we loved our "old" house, we did not plan on being in it forever, we added on and it still was lacking for storage space. We prayed and prayed, I consulted my priest/spiritual director numerous times and we finally made the decision to sell our house and find something else.

Initially we planned on purchasing a home that was already built but it had draw-backs and we couldn't get our home sold in time to purchase it. We were trying to find something NOT in a subdivision so we could have animals and some garden space.

After a while, I went out on a limb and went to a land auction our banker friend had recommended and bought this parcel of 2.25 acres. It sounds crazy now, but the first day I had driven back here was the day of the auction that I purchased it. Dh was working that Sat. and I called him up and said, "Guess what I just did?!" I truly felt like the Holy Spirit was guiding me to purchase that land b/c I felt totally COMPELLED to go to this auction, 4 kids in tow (and pregnant) and the rest is history. I felt peace about it and excitement, as well.

Anyway, we were going to build a modular but obstacle after obstacle was in our way to do that. Finally, we scrapped the modular plan and within the same week, we ordered this house plan.

We continually fought that guilty feelings for building a new home while so many are homeless or living in poor conditions. But my spiritual director continually talked to me about being able to homeschool, providing hospitality (we'll have a whole basement floor that could be an apartment), etc. Same struggles while picking out stuff... quality items but not extravagant.

Anyway, I've gotten interrupted so many times that I suppose this isn't going to be coherent. But dh drives about the same distance, maybe a little less to work. He's a licensed reactor operator and drives about 45 mins. to work, thru the countryside mostly. There are lots of fellow employees there that drive that distance to work but there are also some that opt to live closer by in the big $$ communities but most of them are either single folks, 2-income families and/or only 1-2 kids.

This area has really had a real estate boom even in the out-lying areas so land is really expensive. That's why I came out like a bandit at the auction.

What else? Well, it took a LONG time to discern and finally we just had to step out in faith. The little inner voice that God uses to guide you sometimes was so quiet sometimes... I often said I wish He'd give me a neon sign!


WEll, that's all I can think of now.. more when I can...

JoAnna

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Posted: Sept 06 2006 at 9:11am | IP Logged Quote Kim F

We had always wanted to move out of the city so that part was easy for us. We hadn't planned to move THIS far out lol! But we found a handicapped accessible home ready to move into so it fell into place.

For the previous 18 yrs we lived in homes no larger than 1600 sq ft for the most part. (base housing) You learn to get creative with space. We utilized under bed areas for storage and added shelving to the tops of all the closets - that helps a great deal. Had I known how long we would be in small homes I would have bought different furniture however. An entertainment center was not as helpful as shelving for instance. Ditto for your typical 3 piece living room sets. Bunks were better than beds taking up floor space. We just had too much stuff that was not using space well.

One thing a small space does is forces your hand when it comes to clutter. You cannot afford to accumulate much of it. We got friendly with file cabinets and rubbermaid and thought long and hard before buying toys or clothes. This helped the budget as well as the house and we still follow that habit in a larger home. Not as well as we ought to...

Amy's blog has been following her quest to reorganize and fit into their home rather than trading up. You might find that encouraging too

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Posted: Sept 06 2006 at 9:34pm | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Looks like after many years of renting, God willing, we will be able to buy our own home very soon. We have finally found one in our price range and meeting our "peaceful and quiet" requirements and it looks like we will get financed perhaps as early as mid october!Yay!
Anyway, although the house is big (for us 1500 square feet will be roomy!) we will be downsizing from a tight 4 bedrooms to three for the seven of us. Should be interesting!
I am thinking bunk beds for the boys for sure, and remodel the garage into another bedroom for dd(16).
I will be looking to this thread for more ideas!

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Posted: Sept 19 2006 at 9:38am | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

Living in a small home has it's challenges for sure. We have 1096sqft at the moment and things can get a bit cozy. But you use the space creatively.. which to me means tossing out the ideas of society of everyone having their own personal space (that's your bed, around here) but even my husband and I have done that to some extent.. for instance the tv is in our bedroom so that gives us a space for watching movies that's great for cuddling as a family.. but also let's us have that extra space for the kids to watch something and leave the living room space for other things. And we found we love not having the tv in the living room.

When I dream of a larger house, what I'm thinking of isn't bedroom space (though the boys room could use enough space to add another set of bunkbeds) but rather, a second bathroom, a larger kitchen, a dining area large enough to house my dining table.. I have figured out how to remodel this house for all of that.. and we'd still only have about 1600sqft. And that sounds very nice.. small enough but not too small.

Growing up we lived in some larger rental houses and you really do spread out and spend less time as a family when that happens.. of course when you have enough people to fill those spaces it's less of a problem

I have a quote I have put on our checks that I just love.

"Where there's room in the heart, there's always room in the house"

And when I'm feeling really cramped, I find one of the books or other about pioneers or such and so many people living in a one room cabin.. and realize that most of the problem is the STUFF, not the people.

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Erin
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Posted: Sept 20 2006 at 2:16am | IP Logged Quote Erin

MarilynW wrote:

I get the "dreaming up my ideal home" phases - but after spending the day reading and researching all about Blessed Teresa of Calcutta with the kids, I feel a little guilty about wanting more.


Marilyn

Just a quick moment to comment on Mother Teresa, I also used to have those thoughts, whilst living in my very small house (three rooms then I moved to a five room house) they helped get through those moments and that was good. But I then read that Mother Teresa said and I paraphrase here " If you are born in a palace then you be the very best person you can be in a palace, if you are in the slums then you be the best you can there"

We are not born into a third world country, no we shouldn't be greedy and make consumerism our god but we also shouldn't be guilty about making the best of the society we live in. You are living in an American society, you are already counter- culture in many ways to the rest of America. Rest easy in the fact that your needs will be diffent to the women living in a third world country.

I have lived in very small houses with children. Before extensions our present house was 7m by 11m with five children. We also have a dream of acres, the country lifestyle, the bush for the children to have freedom to run and explore. Particularly as the children's bodies grow in size you notice the limitations a small house or yard place on everyone. Let's face it we are home all day with each other it can get difficult at times. I know my boys would behave better if they had a way to expend their energy.

If this is your dream don't give up, it may happen one day. We keep swinging on this decision also,
pros for in town- our house is now very large, we are very central to activites, we can walk to church to sports, downtown.
Cons for in town, there is not the freedom for the children that a lifestyle on a property would give them. We are on top of each other all day.

Pros for the country- Freedom for the children, a more peaceful lifestyle. the children would have great memories, I do from roaming the hills.
Cons for the country- due to cost the house would most likely be small, starting all over again. the time involved in travel and importantly with today's prices the rising cost of petrol.

We have been looking for over 18 months for the 'right' one. In fact on Saturday we are off to look again at a 140acre property 13km from town Downside is the house is tiny.

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Posted: Sept 20 2006 at 7:36am | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Erin wrote:


We have been looking for over 18 months for the 'right' one. In fact on Saturday we are off to look again at a 140acre property 13km from town Downside is the house is tiny.


I think I could live in a tent if it meant having 140 acres of property!LOL!
To me, outside space is so much more important than indoor. The house we are buying is larger than the rental we are in now, but the property is smaller (going from 8 acres to 1.5). That will be a hard adjustment for us as I am not sure yet what we will do with the horses. Luckily there is much open property around for the kids and I to roam on, even a beautiful stream.
But we are definitely country folk and would wither in a town setting. I know, we've tried it. It did not go well!LOL!

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Posted: Sept 20 2006 at 8:19am | IP Logged Quote Erin

lapazfarm wrote:
I think I could live in a tent if it meant having 140 acres of property!LOL!
To me, outside space is so much more important than indoor.


Theresa,
I have a friend who is currently living in a tent and is now VERY tired of doing so. She insists this is her last winter she will do so, she has had enough. (Our winter's are nothing like your's particularly here on the North coast) Really I told dh I draw the line at a tent with seven children. I'll do a shed but not a tent.

lapazfarm wrote:
The house we are buying is larger than the rental we are in now, but the property is smaller (going from 8 acres to 1.5). That will be a hard adjustment for us as I am not sure yet what we will do with the horses. Luckily there is much open property around for the kids and I to roam on, even a beautiful stream.


This is going to be an adjustment for you. The stream sounds lovely a big plus. Hard with the horses though. We are also country people who somehow have found ourselves in town for the last 11yrs My dc are country kids who are misplanted. They are forever climbing the trees, grubbing in the dirt etc I know if we lived out of town I wouldn't see them all afternoon, they'd be off making cubbies in the bush and exploring.

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Posted: Sept 23 2006 at 7:45am | IP Logged Quote Erin

Soo excited, we looked at the property today and we are going to put in an offer Just need to pray that all the finances swing.

Look hereto see some pics. They don't show the property off to the best but it certainly indicates how small the house is. It is tiny. Ds11 has offered to sleep in a tent, he may well be yet

The property is so interesting, flats, rises, seasonal creek, 2 dams one is very large and we could swim in it. Dh could do a little cropping, we could run some cattle, the soils not the best but then not too bad for this area. Cleared in some areas and still plenty of trees in other sections. I'm so excited, finally after all this time.

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Posted: Sept 23 2006 at 11:16am | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Erin, it looks wonderful! The property is gorgeous! Plenty of room to explore! And the house is small but very cute and tidy with nice windows. I sure hope it works out that you can get it!

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Posted: Sept 23 2006 at 2:06pm | IP Logged Quote Lisbet

Oh Erin! I can 'see' a big active family there!! 140 acres too!! amazing! We are leaving in a about 20 minutes too take a look at this property! Downside is even if it suits us, our house has not sold yet.

Ah well, in HIS time!
http://www.realtor.com/PersPlan/HomeDetail.asp?poe=realtor&i ndex=0&lnksrc=RSR_PROPPHOT

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Posted: Sept 23 2006 at 4:45pm | IP Logged Quote Erin

Lisbet wrote:
Oh Erin! I can 'see' a big active family there!! 140 acres too!! amazing! We are leaving in a about 20 minutes too take a look at this property! Downside is even if it suits us, our house has not sold yet.


Lisbet,
I am so thrilled to think that you are looking at a property. I was very distressed over your neighbour, I was ranting and raving about it to my IRL friends.

I just tried the link to your site but it won't let me in as you have to have a password! So is it a house or house and land? What did you think of it? I'm praying.

Downside here is we also haven't sold our house. Haven't even got it on the market. Dh is stressing but I feel an incredible sense of calm. Actually I rang the bank yesterday and the bridging loans are much better now, they charge the same interest rates as normal loans and not only that but they lend you the interest payment so you haven't got to meet that. In fact you don't even have to pay back anything in the twelve months of the loan. A bridging loan is for twelve months. However I feel very confident that our house will sell in that time. There are not many this big in this town.

Theresa,
It does look cute and tidy but the mind boggles as to how we can fit in The biggest problem is there is no dining room. the owner has a little table in the corner of the kitchen but no way will that work for us. I'm thinking we can eat outside for now as it is summer, just have to battle the mosquitoes.

Don't forget to let us know Lisbet!!

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Posted: Sept 23 2006 at 10:06pm | IP Logged Quote Lisbet

Thanks for the prayers Erin. I know it's all going to work out. We LOVED the house, we are going to go look at it again real deep this time, we may possibly make an offer. It's big, old, and prefect for our family, on 5 great acres. Let's try hopefully you can see it here

I hope it works out for your family too Erin, we'll keep praying!

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Posted: Sept 24 2006 at 6:47am | IP Logged Quote Erin

Lisbet

The house is beautiful, absolutley gorgeous I LOVE it And so cheap!! Well it is compared to over here.
They didn't show any pics of the land, what's it like? Are the neigbours FAR enough away? I thought it was only built in 1990? Is it far for dh to travel?

Soo big I'll keep praying.

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Posted: Sept 24 2006 at 8:12am | IP Logged Quote Lisbet

Erin,

The house was actually built in 1900!! The neighbors on either side and in the rear are corn fields, across the street a ways is another family. It's on 5 acres, about 2 acres of open field and the rest is grassy with some great wooded patches here and there ~ lots of trees and garden beds. It would be a 45 minute drive for my husband to work. We're willing to do that. We LOVE this house! :)

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Posted: Sept 24 2006 at 10:43am | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

Lisa, it looks beautiful!And way cheaper than prices here! I hope you get it!

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Posted: Sept 24 2006 at 11:32am | IP Logged Quote Genevieve

Lisa,

The house looks lovely and well-kept! I hope it works out well for you!

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Posted: Oct 18 2006 at 7:39am | IP Logged Quote Erin

Our offer has been accepted We are moving to the country, we are moving. I am still pinching myself, 140 acres to roam and play, the children will be so busy.

Although I am also thinking of all the things I now have to do. We have to finish up this house to put it on the market, pack up excess and put it in storage so it doesn't look so cluttered. Then we have to pack and move to the knew place.

Also as we are going from a large house to a small house I have to plan how that will happen. Logistics. For example do I put dd13 in with her little sisters, 5 and 2. Or as she wants to read at night should she share with her brothers, 11 and 9 and ds7 can share with the girls? More importantly can I somehow manage to squeeze one or two bookcases into the house? I really don't see how we can manage without some books. If I leave the TV in storage I could do it

Ohh I am so excited I don't know where to start.

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Posted: Oct 18 2006 at 7:53am | IP Logged Quote JennGM

Yeah, Erin!!! I'm so happy! You have waited a long time for this! I'm glad you didn't force the other house, as this one sounds perfect.

You are questioning bookcases? Just remember, they can fit in Mommy and Daddy's room, too. I'd just squeeze them in anywhere you can!

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Posted: Oct 18 2006 at 8:22am | IP Logged Quote Cay Gibson

Congratulations, Erin.

New houses are so exciting!!!

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