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TryingMyBest Forum Pro
Joined: Oct 27 2012
Online Status: Offline Posts: 130
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Posted: Feb 26 2014 at 3:06pm | IP Logged
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This is a big dilemma for me. The earliest my husband gets home from work is about 7:00. He's not home for dinner at all, on average, 2 nights a week.
I find it really hard to get dinner on the table at 7 and then get my daughter into bed by 8.
I thought about serving dinner early to DD and then having a later dinner for DH and me but that seems difficult. I couldn't be cooking in that last hour before bedtime because I'm busy with bath, books, prayers, etc. Plus DH is hungry when he gets home and wants to eat then.
I'd really prefer she be in bed by 7 but I don't think that's possible given my DH's work schedule. There's no way I could get her into bed right as Daddy is coming home from work. Plus he wants to see her after a long day at work.
Any advice here?
We always ate dinner as a family when I was growing up so I think it's important but my parents didn't work the kind of hours my DH works and didn't have a long commute either.
My DD is 4 and even though she's usually in bed by 8, she never actually sleeps until much later. On an average night, she doesn't actually fall asleep until almost 10. She doesn't get to sleep past about 7:15 most mornings because of pre-school. I know she doesn't get enough sleep but I can't make her sleep. Maybe if she was in bed by 7, she might fall asleep earlier but as discussed above, I can't send her to bed right as DH gets home.
Jenn
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
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Posted: Feb 26 2014 at 3:22pm | IP Logged
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Does she nap at all? Can you maybe do a rest time in the afternoon where she needs to lay quietly (perhaps with a book?) and may or may not sleep. that will get her more sleep AND let you push her bedtime a bit later.
Have you talked to your dh? since he gets home later maybe he could do her bedtime on the nights when he's home to spend special time with her.
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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SallyT Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 08 2007
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Posted: March 04 2014 at 1:29pm | IP Logged
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I like Jodie's idea of a "quiet time" in the afternoon, even if she doesn't sleep. That at the very least gives you a small break, which might give *you* the stamina for evening parenting. I know that *I'm* often frazzed by the end of the day, even with older kids, and that that drives me to want them to go. to. bed. NOW. If not sooner.
If you can have dinner on just after 7, then you can eat together, and then the bedtime machinery can roll into gear: maybe trade off who does dinner clean-up and who does bedtime, if neither one of you wants to get slotted permanently into one role or the other.
Certainly if your daughter isn't falling right to sleep at 7 or 8, it shouldn't hurt her schedule any to let bedtime roll a little later, to accommodate dinner. FWIW, when my older kids went to school, we never managed to get them to bed before nine, and somehow we all survived! Some kids do seem to need fewer consecutive hours of sleep than the recommended norm. And again, a rest time in the afternoon can take up some of that slack -- if she really needs sleep, she'll sleep. If not, the down-time is still a good idea.
And if you and your husband can double-team to get the kitchen clean and her in bed simultaneously, that still gives you some evening time together as a couple.
Sally
__________________ Castle in the Sea
Abandon Hopefully
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anitamarie Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 15 2008
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Posted: March 04 2014 at 4:27pm | IP Logged
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Have you considered bathing her before dinner or in the morning, thereby shortening the bedtime routine? Then you could have dinner with your dh and she can still get to bed by 8ish.
Anita
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Becky Parker Forum All-Star
Joined: May 23 2005 Location: Michigan
Online Status: Offline Posts: 2582
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Posted: March 04 2014 at 7:26pm | IP Logged
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We have a late dinner time too. Dinner around 7 or sometimes 7:30 has become the norm. Since my kids never fall asleep that early, we choose to do a family meal and family prayer time before sending them to bed which usually isn't until 9. I am usually very weary by that point! But doing baths ahead of time, before dinner really helps! If she's ready for bed by dinner then maybe your dh can take over story time while you clean up the kitchen or vice versa.
__________________ Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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