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TryingMyBest
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| Posted: Oct 09 2013 at 10:51am | IP Logged
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Hi everyone, I resigned from my full time position in July and was asked to work part time from home while they looked for a replacement. I've been working about 18 hours a week on average. All from home. My DD (almost 4 years old) is in a Montessori school 3 mornings a week. I work while she's in school, during naptime and for about an hour after she goes to bed.
They haven't liked any of the candidates they've interviewed. At this point, it looks like they'll need me for at least 3 more months.
We're planning a move in a few weeks and I didn't line up school for DD since I thought I'd be done working. While I've done some work while DD is awake, I really don't want to work when she's with me. It's too easy for me to turn on the TV when I need to get work done or talk to someone on the phone.
The extra money makes a big difference in our budget and I much more than it costs to send DD to school so it's worth my time. My work can finance our move and setting up the new house and the rest is going into savings.
I've found a school in our new neighborhood that has spots available. We friends from church who send their kids to this school and they love it. It's private but secular which concerns me. I've found a church pre-school but it's too long of a drive to permit me to work while she's in school.
If you were in my shoes, would you keep working and building savings for the short term while sending your children to school for a few hours a week? The long term plan in homeschooling and having money in the bank will definitely make that easier in the future. I suspect that they will probably need me through the winter and there is a possibility that this could drag into next year.
Jenn
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Kathryn
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Given what you've stated, I would probably send her to the preschool and continue working and saving. While it's "secular", it's still preschool so I doubt there's going to be much in the way that could lead her soul astray. I'm sure they'll be doing counting and alphabet and recess etc. which is everything my daughter did at a church-affiliated group except she went for about 15 min to chapel 1x a week.  You can always start her day with prayer as you drop her off and pick her up.
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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TryingMyBest
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I applied online for the private school. For gender, it gave me the option of "Male, Female or Other." Then at the end, it asked me how I'd heard of their school. One of the media options was something called Gay Parents. Knowing the neighborhood and that this is a secular, rather expensive private school (also it's a "W" school, if you know what I mean - won't say more than that) I wouldn't be at all surprised if there are kids in the early childhood program with two daddies or mommies. DD attends a secular Montessori school now but we haven't been confronted yet with a school classmate with two mommies or daddies. This is making me re-think things a little bit.
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Kathryn
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| Posted: Oct 10 2013 at 5:37pm | IP Logged
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TryingMyBest wrote:
| For gender, it gave me the option of "Male, Female or Other." |
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Seriously? I thought it was extreme when my ob-gyn office listed "partner" instead of spouse on the forms.  
Yes, I probably would not want to put my children in any school where they could be subjected to lifestyles, ideas and philosophies that are in such complete contrast to our faith. Hence, why we homeschool. 
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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pumpkinmom
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| Posted: Oct 10 2013 at 6:33pm | IP Logged
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I think I would keep working because you will really need that money in the future. I would be concerned about that school too. Is there another mom that you trust that could be hired to watch your daughter? One with a child the same age and maybe the mom would spend some time working on preschool stuff. I'm sure this option would be cheaper than a school and maybe you could offer her more money for schooling and provide the supplies she needed (at least in my area it would be cheaper). I don't know, but that is what I would be looking for in your situation just because we don't have the school options in our area.
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Cassie
Homeschooling my little patch of Ds-14 and Ds-10
Tending the Pumpkin Patch
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pmeilaen
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TryingMyBest wrote:
I applied online for the private school. For gender, it gave me the option of "Male, Female or Other."
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I think those options are quite common now, no matter where you apply.
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Eva
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Kathryn
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| Posted: Oct 10 2013 at 7:41pm | IP Logged
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pmeilaen wrote:
TryingMyBest wrote:
I applied online for the private school. For gender, it gave me the option of "Male, Female or Other."
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I think those options are quite common now, no matter where you apply. |
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Again...seriously?! I must be really out of the loop.
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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Erin
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Looking at the 18hrs a week, could you perhaps work three hours of a night once dd is in bed? 6 nights a week might be a stretch, so perhaps one or two days a week share care with a friend, hire a teenage babysitter?
Or easier still try other preschools.
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Erin
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pmeilaen
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| Posted: Oct 10 2013 at 8:44pm | IP Logged
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Kathryn wrote:
pmeilaen wrote:
TryingMyBest wrote:
I applied online for the private school. For gender, it gave me the option of "Male, Female or Other."
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I think those options are quite common now, no matter where you apply. |
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Again...seriously?! I must be really out of the loop. |
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My husband tried to explain this option to my children the other day and said it's for those people who do not know what they are. Apparently there are a lot these days.
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Eva
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Kathryn
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pmeilaen wrote:
My husband tried to explain this option to my children the other day and said it's for those people who do not know what they are. Apparently there are a lot these days. |
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I would probably say something like, "well maybe they want gorillas and cheetahs to apply b/c after all, you guys act like gorillas and cheetahs sometimes." 
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Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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pmeilaen
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Kathryn wrote:
pmeilaen wrote:
My husband tried to explain this option to my children the other day and said it's for those people who do not know what they are. Apparently there are a lot these days. |
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I would probably say something like, "well maybe they want gorillas and cheetahs to apply b/c after all, you guys act like gorillas and cheetahs sometimes." |
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I'm pretty sure I would get, "but there are he and she animals."
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Eva
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TryingMyBest
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Thanks everyone for the advice. We're moving to the area and I can't think of anyone I already know who can watch DD on the mornings. I will definitely need to work mornings since I sometimes need to do calls and it's unprofessional to do them with a child (or Dora) in the background. I've done it when DD has been sick and everyone understood but I can't do it because I didn't arrange childcare, KWIM?
I've found a few parochial school affiliated pre-schools in the area but I have no confidence in the average parochial school anymore. I've always said that I'd rather place my child in a secular school and teach the faith at home then send my kid to a religious school and have to tell her that what she learned at school was wrong. And odds are that there are two mommy/daddy households in those schools too.
We do have friends who send their kids to this school but I'm afraid to ask too much about the gay thing. People are so touchy about that subject and I don't want to offend them by asking and somehow imply that there is something wrong with the school they love. And what if they decide that we're bigots because I'm concerned about it? Thankfully we've never been confronted with this particular issue with a close friend or family member engaged in that lifestyle so never had to make a choice but it's probably only a matter of time.
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guitarnan
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I'd argue that most Catholic schools don't have two mommy/daddy households, and that a parochial school that is very liberal but still adheres to the basics of Catholic teaching is better than a school that kowtows to the same-sex "marriage" lobby. I don't want to get political here, of course, but at your daughter's age, a religion class in a Catholic school will look pretty much the same at any parochial school - basic prayers, Church seasons/feasts, the Blessed Mother, saints. You wouldn't need to do much correcting, if any. She's too young - concepts presented at school will be basic and age-appropriate.
On the other hand, if your daughter goes to a secular school, you may or may not have to re-teach her at home; it will depend on the school's curriculum, the teachers' statements in class and the other families - all things you won't know unless you do a lot of observing in the classroom before you register your daughter. (You could do this, and it would be a great way to find out what really goes on...and I would run far, far away from any school that would not let a preschooler's parent observe. Far, far, far away.)
I certainly know what it's like to move to a new place and not know anyone (at school or otherwise). It's difficult! No wonder you are feeling stressed right now.
Having said that, perhaps you would consider the local parochial preschools as an alternative to a school that you already know accepts a lifestyle that you do not agree with? It can't hurt to look, and you might just find a preschool that offers you peace of mind.
My daughter went to Catholic Pre-K for a year (the year before we moved across an ocean and began homeschooling) and she loved it. We loved the teachers, too - they were kind and caring, and taught the simple, age-appropriate truths of our faith in a way their young students could understand. It was a lovely year for her.
My best advice: Keep all the doors and windows open until you decide to close them, one by one, on your terms and in God's time.
 Praying for you, with so, so much empathy!
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Advice Needed RE Part Time Work
