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pumpkinmom
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| Posted: Jan 18 2013 at 8:18pm | IP Logged
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I have a cedar chest over flowing with clothes and blankets. Some from when I was a baby, some from the boys, and my wedding dress.
I REALLY would like to have a reading nook and the only space in the house is where the cedar chest is sitting. Actually it would be a tight fit, but I really need a place away from the rest of the family.
Do I really need to keep this stuff? They really serve no purpose. Yet, I'm having a hard time letting go. I'm sure I would keep some of it, but down size to the plastic tub in the closet. What purpose does it serve to hang on to my wedding dress?
Someone please talk me into or out of this. 
Update below.
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Cassie
Homeschooling my little patch of Ds-14 and Ds-10
Tending the Pumpkin Patch
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guitarnan
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| Posted: Jan 18 2013 at 10:39pm | IP Logged
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One of my dear friends, who's my dad's age (76) saved her wedding dress in spite of the fact that both of her children were boys.
Her younger granddaughter was delighted to discover that the dress fit her perfectly except for length, and it suited her wonderfully. She had the dress shortened and wore it proudly on her wedding day.
Yes, that dress was set aside for a long, long, time - and, in addition, it moved across the country several times because my friend married the Navy.
Do you need to keep the dress in the cedar chest? No. Do you need to keep all the other items? That's up to you. I'd beg storage space from family or friends before I'd set aside my wedding dress, personally, especially after seeing my friend's joy at her granddaughter's wedding.
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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CrunchyMom
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 6:09am | IP Logged
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I got my wedding dress used and when my sister couldn't wear it, I passed it along to a consignment shop. I am not all that sentimental, and we lived in a tiny house, and all I could imagine was it turning yellow in storage (it was polyester, not real silk, satin, or linen), and then no one else could ever use it. I have lots of pictures 
I think the story Nancy tells is lovely, and I admit that I would not necessarily make the choice to get rid of it now. I liked the idea, too, of having a baptism gow or first communion dress from it, but it had beading all over it, so it wasn't really appropriate for that.
But honestly, I am over it. If I had put more effort into finding my dress or choosing it specially or making it, I might feel differently. As it was, it sort of fell into my lap, and I was just glad to be able to afford (it was originally a very expensive dress) a big train that fit the scale of the church and a bodice that wasn't strapless. My hope was that someone else would be grateful for the same.
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Lindsay
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Becky Parker
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 9:05am | IP Logged
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I don't know what to tell you, Cassie, except that as I have gotten older I have become more sentimental. I got rid of so much when I was younger. I only saved my baby's baptismal gown, which was hand made, a few of my dd's dresses which her grandmother made, and a baby quilt for each child, also made by grandmother. I also have my wedding dress, although I never had it preserved so I have no idea what state it will be in in the future. It is somewhat special because I designed it myself. My mother's was not fit to wear - it had fallen apart over the years - so I had one made that looked very much like hers.
I still think that is enough to save, along with pictures, but it has become more important to me over the years.
I've seen neat pictures where people have framed their child's baptismal gown. That would be one way to free up space, if it goes with the decor in your master bedroom or elsewhere. As for the baby quilts, I have mine on a quilt rack that sits at the end of our bed. If the blankets you mentioned are special to you, hanging them on a quilt rack would also free up some space, and allow the handiwork to be appreciated.
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Becky
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 10:07am | IP Logged
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My mother kept her wedding gown in a box with no special precautions, and it was and still is in very good shape. One of my sisters wore it. I was too tall or I might have also worn it.
Wedding dresses are hard to pass along, aren't they? I see them in thrift stores sometimes and wonder what the story behind each was. I know my dd will be too tall and just bigger over all for my dress, but I still have it.
My family has one communal baptism gown that has been worn by over thirty babies since 1950!
A couple of years ago I purged a ton of papers and souvenirs and keepsake type items. I don't regret it so far.
My dad's mom kept baby blankets and clothing from her children, and when she died we had to sort through it. Most of it was falling apart, yellowed, mildewed, etc. Ugh- that was so sad, somehow. She had kept all that stuff for ages, but I doubt she ever really looked at it. And even though I knew some of things had been my dad's as a child, I felt no special bond with them and did not want to keep them.
When it is all said and done, you really can't take it with you, can you?
I have been thinking of that a lot lately.
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Betsy
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 10:36am | IP Logged
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I was just having this conversation with someone. It is a very difficult question and the answer is different for everyone!
One thing that I wanted to add to the conversation is saving things that really truly don't have much sentimental value, but then become hard to get rid of because you have (or your parents have) kept them for so long.
My MIL kept a TON of stuff for my dh. It wasn't special to him or her, but just kept. It was hard to pair it down because it was 30 years old, but no one (especially ME) had any sentimental attachment to them.
So, while I think that it is really good and valuable to save things, try not to save things that no one is sentimental about and makes it a problem later to get rid of.
My only other suggestion is that purging doesn't need to be done all at once. Pare down what you know isn't sentimental, is stained, has holes in, won't last and then keep the rest. Make a plan to revisit it in 6 months or a year and see how you feel about what you kept then.
FWIW, I have my dress, preserved in a box. I have moved it three times and I am always looking at it wondering the same thing. And, as of right now I don't have any kids that will be wearing it.
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 10:51am | IP Logged
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Don't forget that you can take pictures of things even if you decide you need to get rid of them.
Also consider if you'll use it. My grammy made lovely things and I know that she'd rather have them in used, even if it means used up, than stored away. So I have out her afgans to use.
Now there are things that are my children's that she made that are put up. But it's becase they got big and the afgans are baby blanket size. And those are in my children's boxes for saving. But it's saving for a purpose. For them to get big enough to have kids of their own and be able to use these things. These are not things for preserving as keepsakes but rather.. preserving as "hand me downs".
Luckily both my family and dh's family handed those things down to us while we could still use them. Example is a quilt that was made for my dh.. but in pink so my MIL who had all boys never used it. But she found it and gave it to us in time for my youngest girl to get to use it.
My wedding dress is saved. We've even gotten it out relatively recently. My girls were watching "Say Yes to the Dress" and we were talking about how rediculous it is that none of the dresses have shoulders so I pulled out my dress and my oldest put it on as the model (it was still a bit big on her) but it let the girls get to really see the dress.
But my girls appreciate those types of things too. When my second daughter was ready for First Communion her and her older sister conspired and they told me that they wanted her to use her older sister's dress that I'd made. So all the girls (well the 3 older ones, little one still to young) have used the same dress from their choice.
I do have a few things that are unusable that I keep. But they take up very little room. And I have some things that I've kept and hope to get out when I don't have littles that would ruin them.. like the thread crocheted bedspread that couldn't handle the little guys poking at the holes or pulling at it or whatnot.
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pumpkinmom
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 11:02am | IP Logged
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Thanks everyone! This has given something to think about to help in this decision.
The boys bapitism outfits have already turned yellow! My dress is dirty because I didn't want to spend a hundred dollars to have it cleaned. It is brown along the bottom and I think I remember some yellowing. I just couldn't see it being fit for someone else to use. I would love to make something out of it, but my skills are too limited and I can't think of anything to make. It is such a hard decision because I don't know what to do with it if I get rid of it. I may talk to my sewing pro aunt for ideas. She will throw a fit about tearing it up though! I may ask her to make me something special with it and maybe she could handle that. I certainly didn't get her senimental values!
I decided to take all of my clothes and blankets and down size the boys to give them as a gift to my cousin. She will treasure them because she is very sentimental over stuff like this and she is expecting her second and loves second hand gifts. I have some dresses that would fit her 5 year old too.
I admit that it is hard parting with some of this stuff! I know I won't regret it if I make the right decision on it's fate. I wonder if I would ever have a sentimental granddaughter? That would be good to know at this moment.
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Cassie
Homeschooling my little patch of Ds-14 and Ds-10
Tending the Pumpkin Patch
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 11:19am | IP Logged
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You may even get a sentimental daughter-in-law.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 11:20am | IP Logged
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And you might try just washing the items that are yellowing.. sometimes that's all that's needed.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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pumpkinmom
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 1:12pm | IP Logged
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Update:
I went through it all. Only thing left in the chest is my wedding dress and two blankets that belong to dh (he's not home to make a decision on them). I will need to purchase a container for the dress to store in a closet. I guess I will keep it as long as there is room for it. I have a bag of clothes/baby blankets for my cousin. I saved a blanket, onesie from the hospital, baptism outfit, and coming home from hospital outfit and put away in a differnt place for each boy. A few things to trash. My prom dress and the suit my oldest wore for his first communion are garage sale bound. My prom dress is a classic style and I believe it could still be worn. Well, not for prom, but maybe a formal event for a woman. If not I will donate to the flash back prom that a Relay for Life group host every year. 1995 wasn't that long ago!  Oh, and my rocking chair from when I was a child is going to my parent's attic until I have grandchildren. Might leave it my parent's guest bedroom for my nephew and any future children my brother has. It's in my basment and that is what set off this whole thing off. Dh asked me to get rid of it!
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Cassie
Homeschooling my little patch of Ds-14 and Ds-10
Tending the Pumpkin Patch
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Jan 19 2013 at 3:13pm | IP Logged
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You did good work! Enjoy your reading space 
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Items of sentimental value
