Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Susana
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Posted: May 31 2010 at 4:42pm | IP Logged Quote Susana
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guitarnan
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Posted: May 31 2010 at 4:54pm | IP Logged Quote guitarnan
It sounds to me as though there are a couple of things going on, particularly with setting boundaries and working together to confront and deal with problems.

I would suggest marriage counseling for this couple. Your friend cannot do anything about her MIL's behavior, but she and her husband can find ways to handle whatever her MIL says and does. They need to do this together, and perhaps a counselor can help them work through this process.

I am not sure calling the police is a good idea unless the children are in danger. (Then she should call.) If her husband is at his mother's when she calls the police, she has to be prepared that he might very well choose his mother over her. It doesn't sound, from your brief post, that she wants that.

I will pray for your friend and her family.

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SuzanneG
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Posted: May 31 2010 at 5:13pm | IP Logged Quote SuzanneG
guitarnan wrote:
I would suggest marriage counseling for this couple. Your friend cannot do anything about her MIL's behavior, but she and her husband can find ways to handle whatever her MIL says and does. They need to do this together, and perhaps a counselor can help them work through this process.


I second this. Working through in-law-problems, in many situations, can completely strengthen a marriage, instead of destroying it!   An impartial third party should help BOTH sides realize the others strong feelings and ways to deal with them!

A couple tangible things YOU can do in reference to this....

1. Give her any contacts you may have of family-counselors. Or of people who may know a counselor or two.    Or, try to find a couple names of counselors for her....giving her a place to start. The whole process of finding a good, trustworthy counselor is often what keeps people from taking this plunge.

2. Offer to watch her kids for a couple hours, so she can call her insurance company, see what's covered, and start making phone calls to find someone. This is quite time consuming and a quiet house is helpful.

3. If she is worried about the cost of counseling, reinforce the fact that their marriage is the MOST important investment of their lives.

4. If she balks at babysitting during counseling, help her brainstorm a list of options! This, too, can seem overwhelming!

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KauaiCatholic
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Posted: May 31 2010 at 5:16pm | IP Logged Quote KauaiCatholic
no advice but offering prayers here ...

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Chris V
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Posted: May 31 2010 at 6:38pm | IP Logged Quote Chris V
KauaiCatholic wrote:
no advice but offering prayers here ...


Likewise

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