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JennGM
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It's my first child, and he's showing interest...so I thought I would embark on potty training. I'm not going to push it, since he is young. I'd love to hear what has worked with you veteran mothers. Potty chair or no? Special toilet seat or not? Both?
Any books that you would recommend? Advice?
Thanks! 
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Jennifer G. Miller
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Genevieve
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my son love Once Upon A Potty. I took heed of Lillard's advice which was to put underwear on him and let him run around. When pee ran down his legs, I told him that he had just pee-ed.  You might want to start off by letting him run around the backyard first. That being said, I think a good sign to know when he is potty-ready is whether he is dry after his afternoon nap. At the beginning, he was resistent to it because he had to go potty every hour. But now he has to go every three hours in-between. Also we don't use the potty chair. We just hoist him on the regular potty but backwards. Two advantages. One if he mis-aims it hits the back of the potty lid. Second, less clean up for me.  When I started him, he could climb onto the regular potty by himself.
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julia s.
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Jenn,
I made a lot of mistakes with my first (which my second benefitted from greatly) so hopefully I can help a little here. Sometimes when they show interest initially it's just a sort of curiosity and after a couple of days they don't want to do it any more. If he backs away or says it's not what he wants after a couple days please listen to him -- this was the biggest mistake I made with my oldest son. Boys take longer to warm up to the idea. Sometime in the third year you can take a stronger stance and use rewards and things like that but two years is still pretty young for boys. I'm not suggesting your son won't just love potty training and take to it just fine, but I'm just warning you that it might be one of those false starts.
I remember being pressured by my neighbors to potty train my son early and it just couldn't have gone worse. It took years to undo what went wrong (and I'm still having to remind him to just go).
As for the specifics I'll leave that to those who have more experience than me. I just wanted to pass along my cautionary tale because to this day I wish I had back that moment when he told me he didn't want to use the potty any more and that diapers were for kids too.
Good luck.
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JennGM
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julia s. wrote:
Jenn,
I made a lot of mistakes with my first (which my second benefitted from greatly) so hopefully I can help a little here. Sometimes when they show interest initially it's just a sort of curiosity and after a couple of days they don't want to do it any more. If he backs away or says it's not what he wants after a couple days please listen to him -- this was the biggest mistake I made with my oldest son. Boys take longer to warm up to the idea. Sometime in the third year you can take a stronger stance and use rewards and things like that but two years is still pretty young for boys. I'm not suggesting your son won't just love potty training and take to it just fine, but I'm just warning you that it might be one of those false starts. |
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Thanks for the advice! I was aware of false starts and just thought I really would make him familiar and comfortable but maybe not go "all the way" until I'm sure he's ready. But does the make it worse? He just seems so obsessed with the potty, uncomfortable with wet or stinky diapers...asking me to change him, telling me when he's done and he goes on demand when we put him on the toilet. But he's not dry all the time after naps, so then I start doubting. And he's awfully wet in the morning...he sleeps really hard. I foresee that as a problem with night wetting...dh had that, and some of my sisters and brother, too.  But knowing that can help me stay calm, right? I guess that will be another post down the road...the best way to protect a mattress! 
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Jennifer G. Miller
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julia s.
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Jen,
If he's the one showing interest then go ahead, but let him know you'll still use diapers for naps and night time. If he's really wet when he wakes up this probably is a good indicator that if he were to go without the diaper right now he'd still be wet and you'll be changing wet sheets and stuff. (Another mistake I made with ds was I was so convincing about getting rid of the diapers that eventhough he had night time wetting I couldn't get him to wear even the pull ups or anything that was bulky or made him think of diapers. As a result I've changed many a wet bed and wet child in the middle of the night  .)
I was a really naive and completely clueless new mother --I had no experience and no one to turn for advice except my neighbors who, although full of advice for me, just couldn't understand what my exact needs were. The fact that you knew there could be false starts proves you're head over heels wiser than I was at that time.
HTH and I'm not just muddying the waters.
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Sarah
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Try to get #2 timed for the potty. If he usually goes #2 at about the same time see if you can get him to go in the potty. I used a potty chair that sat on the regular toilet. Keep him in diapers during this process and be happy and laid back. Encourage him throughout the next months to go #1 occasionally. Then between age 2 1/2 to 3 when you are ready for two weeks or so of training tell him this is the end of diapers and make a big deal of the training pants (Target has them)-buy lots. Don't plan on going lots of places and keep life regular. Ask frequently to use the toilet and don't take no for an answer(but keep it pleasant (try not to get mad). Limit sweet drinks, etc. Expect about two weeks before it really gets under way. Bring a change of clothes in public and any other items he might need. We also put a sticker on a page in the bathroom for each success and maybe even good effort. Don't use pull-ups and don't go back to diapers-even if you feel like at first there is no success (unless you really feel your child is not ready). If you have been preparing him throughout the months prior he should be ready because he knows what goes in the toilet. This is how I've done it and it has worked for the last three boys of all different temperments. Some kids hate to be wet, some could sit in it for days. You need to be very present and involved.
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Marybeth
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Jenn,
We to check out our potty books from the library. Our library had a whole shelf devoted to potty training books for kiddies!
We really enjoyed Once Upon a Potty book and video. Everyone Poops and Wash Your Hands were favorites too.
We kept our potty chair in the bathroom b/c it seemed confusing to me when people I knew had several all over the house. 
My dh was very involved which made it easier on me. He would always take dh to the bathroom when he got home from work and before bedtime. My dh turned 5 in July and just stopped wearing diapers at night. He was always soaked in the morning. I think each child just is different in regards to nightime wetness.
Good luck!
Marybeth
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JennGM
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| Posted: Oct 03 2005 at 8:39pm | IP Logged
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Thanks, Marybeth!!!
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Jennifer G. Miller
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rashfordmom
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Jenn,
I just came upon this thread. How is the potty training going? I am the mommy to two boys who "trained" very early. My first ds stopped using diapers the week of his second birthday and the second somwhere around 2 1/2. We still used diapers/pull-ups at naps and bedtime until around 3 1/2.
I did receive some potty books (after the first was already trained, lol!), but they didn't really help in the process. I think the two biggest influences were getting them to the potty as soon as I saw the "I need to go poop" look on their face. Secondly, we have a little potty that has a "seat" that pulls off and fits on top of our real toilet. I have always, from the beginning, put the seat up on the big toilet and had them use it that way. That way, all I have to do is flush and wipe their bottom--no cleaing the potty!
Getting them comfortable with going #2 was a huge help in the process. When they started talking, one of their first words was "poop" and "pee-pee" and the awareness of it followed not too long after.
Anyway, you may not even need this information now but I wanted to share my .02.
I even have my 14-mo. dd using the potty for #2 and we've been doing it since about 11-mo! I usually catch her right before or as she is beginning and run her to the bathroom. There is no pressure or bribing, just reading their signs and going with it.
Blessings,
Amanda Rashford
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Rachel May
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From a military/structured perspective:
Toilet Training in Less Than a Day
I think of it as potty boot camp. It didn't work in a day with my kids, but the twins were both mostly accident free by the end of 2 weeks (3.5 yo) and very few sleep accidents. DD did better during the day, but nighttime wetting for years. Our pediatrician/friend/father of 6 told me that nighttime wetting is developmental not willful which was helpful to know.
Boot camped the 3rd boy, but it didn't take. About a year later we were both ready. He was harder to train, and took longer, but I knew he had the basics so we hiked up our skirts and soldiered on!
Try whenever you think dc is ready and don't be afraid to stop if it isn't taking.
PS I firmly believe that someday excrement will not be a major part of my conversation but not anytime soon.
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JennGM
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rashfordmom wrote:
| How is the potty training going? I am the mommy to two boys who "trained" very early. My first ds stopped using diapers the week of his second birthday and the second somwhere around 2 1/2. We still used diapers/pull-ups at naps and bedtime until around 3 1/2. |
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Thanks, Amanda, for asking. We're still in preliminary stages. He wears a diaper. We still put him on the toilet when he wants and before baths. We had huge success one day when he went "stinky" in the toilet. It was so easy, he wasn't sure what happened. When he looked in the toilet, he asked "How did that pine cone get in there?"
We travel frequently during the college football season to my mil's in PA, as my dh and his mother have season tickets to PSU...and then my grandmother got sick and died in less than a month...and so on. So having such an upheaval isn't a good time to train, so it will probably happen after Christmas during our cabin fever days.
rashfordmom wrote:
| Secondly, we have a little potty that has a "seat" that pulls off and fits on top of our real toilet. I have always, from the beginning, put the seat up on the big toilet and had them use it that way. That way, all I have to do is flush and wipe their bottom--no cleaing the potty! |
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This is what I am doing so far. I have the Bjorn Toilet trainer and love it...and he loves the independence of it. I'm hoping for a second one for the other main floor bathroom, but we'll see. I'll get a little potty for the van for emergencies....
But I'm chuckling to myself because I know whatever I hope to do or plan to do gets waylaid somehow, and ds could just not cooperate!
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Jennifer G. Miller
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JennGM
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That is the approach my sister takes. She camps down for a week, giving the boot camp. Seems to work pretty well for her 3 boys so far, but she didn't rush them at an early age, either. Sometimes it didn't "stick" and she'd do it again, like you mention.
Rachel May wrote:
| Try whenever you think dc is ready and don't be afraid to stop if it isn't taking. |
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That's just key, I believe. I'm not going to force it until he's ready. This is where I don't understand the mentality of today starting earlier and earlier....and is your child really potty trained if you have to remind them and take them all the time because they are so young? In my mind, no! Just because they aren't wearing diapers doesn't mean they aren't potty trained!
Rachel May wrote:
| PS I firmly believe that someday excrement will not be a major part of my conversation but not anytime soon. |
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It's cyclical. Just wait until you and dh are in your dotage! It will be a major part again!
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Jennifer G. Miller
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Rachel May
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jenngm67 wrote:
| This is where I don't understand the mentality of today starting earlier and earlier....and is your child really potty trained if you have to remind them and take them all the time because they are so young? In my mind, no! Just because they aren't wearing diapers doesn't mean they aren't potty trained! |
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You could have quoted that out of the book! My FIL tried to tell me about Potty Training infants the other day.
I have friends who say that they want to have kids in diapers until they themselves are in diapers. I think that's a great attitude.
Our van potty is a diaper that is held loosely around the correct area. Easy to pack and dispose of but we've never had to deal with #2 in the van.
Also, the latest trained loved the "Super Pooper" song we learned from a cheesy Duke U. video. I went there so I had to check it out. Over time the tune morphed to "You are a Human Animal" from a Disney sing along with words to fit the rhythm. Everyone knew and sang the song on demand.
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JennGM
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Rachel May wrote:
| You could have quoted that out of the book! My FIL tried to tell me about Potty Training infants the other day. |
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I'm glad to hear it! I have a copy...I'll start reading it soon! Thanks for the help!
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Jennifer G. Miller
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Rachel May
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I had a laundry epiphany the other day which relates to this. As I was folding clothes I realized that completely by accident I had bought FTL undies for the 3 yo (these are actually hand me downs) and Hanes for the 6 yos. Once I knew that, it was so much easier to sort. Now if I would buy a different brand for DH I'm sure his underwear would never end up the the 6yos drawer again. I know you don't need this quite yet Jenn.....
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Tina P.
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My first boy insisted on going to the bathroom (#2) outside. I guess he's just a nature boy. We were in Arizona at the time, so out the back door the potty seat went and whoosh! he exploded. Poor little tyke held it in until we understood what he wanted and offered him the opportunity to do what he wanted. He had one accident since then. He's 11 now.
Our little girl was easy *EXCEPT* that she screamed bloody murder if we ever walked away from her (you know, so the house wouldn't catch on fire while we were trying to make dinner?) on the toilet.
Our third said he couldn't do it and waited until he was 3.5. We bribed him with a DVD. It worked. I'll do it again if the need arises.
Our fourth was excited about hitting the Cheerios in the toilet with his pee stream.
The fifth was easy (a girl again), but she also needed a lot of attention. It's a girl thing.
Jacob's almost 3 and has no desire to find out what happens, though I've read him the Dr. Sears book (it's awesome, btw) You Can Go to the Potty, I think it's called. All of my boys were over or just at 3 yo when they figured out that this was the way to go (pun absolutely intended). But once they figured it out, day and night were figured out at the same time.
My mom says she trained us at 9 months. We couldn't even walk then! She actually had us on a strict schedule and she trained herself to know our schedule!
I confided to someone once that I was frustrated that my kids were so poky about potty training. She said, "When was the last time you saw someone walking down the wedding aisle in a diaper?" I guess they catch on at some point, eh?
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Topic: Toilet Training
