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Martha in VA
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We would like for our whole family to attend midnight mass together. I'm looking for input from other families who do this. Do you put your children to bed and then scoop them up at 11:30 p.m.? Do you just let them stay up until it's time for mass? Do you require them to have some rest time that afternoon? The ages of ours are 11, 9, 7, 4.
Thanks for the help.
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Martha
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We require rest, but not sleep that afternoon. If they sleep though, it's a short plus.
Also, there is the santa incentive to help along. If they are good during mass, santa might have left their presents while we were gone. 
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alicegunther
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I would love to bring my children to Midnight Mass, but this is not the year for us! It would be such an incredibly beautiful experience for them.
Danielle Bean wrote a post about it just this week, although I do not have time to get the link for you.
Merry Christmas!!!
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marihalojen
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Three words for you, Martha - Frosted Sugar Cookies.
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kjohnson
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Services in the wee hours is just a given in our family. When we were Orthodox, we never missed the Pascha (Easter) service, which was always at midnight and lasted at least 3 hours, after which was a huge fast-breaking meal, which always put us back home around 4am. We've done that with children from the infant stage up to 9 years old and never had a problem. The little ones doze off in the service, but that's ok. They looked forward to it every year.
So this year, midnight Mass on Christmas is all the talk around here. My 8 year old has already asked if she could have caffeine for dinner so that she wouldn't fall asleep in Mass.
Whether it was Pascha or now Christmas Mass, I always say that I'm going to have the kids nap or have a quiet afternoon. But it never really happens and things always work out just fine. Honestly, there is nothing more beautiful than a candle lit service in the middle of the night and I can already see the richness of the memories my children have.
There is an adrenaline factor in the kids staying up for these services. Just anticipate some early bed times or afternoon naps (both voluntary) on Christmas day.
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TracyFD
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Do any of you have children who make things miserable the day after staying up past their bedtime? I have been avoiding Midnight Mass due to my 6yo. Even staying up until 9pm after her violin recital resulted in, well, two days now of tears and difficult behavior. It's been like this all her life - I always avoid taking her out past 6pm. Sometimes it cannot be avoided, but I am not excited about the thought of her being contrary on Christmas Day.
Do you have similar children and does it work out anyway?
Tracy
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Martha
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We stay home Christmas day, so it's not a big deal to let them sleep in or lay about all day.
In fact, it's our family tradtion that no one gets dressed on christmas day. We just get up, exchange presents, eat, watch christmass movies/parades, play with our new stuff, eat, nap, play, repeat process. It's the ONLY day all year we ever get to do this. No dishes, no laundry, no errands or visits. A true and complete day of risk and family enjoyment.
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Sarah
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TracyFD wrote:
Even staying up until 9pm after her violin recital resulted in, well, two days now of tears and difficult behavior.
Tracy |
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This is me . I've always wanted to go, but its not possible for me at this time in our lives. Christmas day really depends on me being able to function and I'm not a person who can function well without sleep. It may sound whiny, but I know my limits.
I think it would be so neat, though and someday when I don't have little ones it will be great! Its just not my season.
Just wanted to give the other side for those of you that feel guilty that you can't do it. I think that those who do it though are really neat and providing great memories for their kids.
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MaryM
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Martha in VA wrote:
| Do you put your children to bed and then scoop them up at 11:30 p.m.? Do you just let them stay up until it's time for mass? Do you require them to have some rest time that afternoon? |
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In the interest of full disclosure, I'll have to admit that my bunch are night-owls like their mother , so it has never been much of a stretch to get them to midnight Mass without any rest before hand. That being said, we have had many fall asleep during Mass, but manage to be quite pleasant the next day.
And many of the Midnight Masses that I am aware of are not at midnight. Many are around 11:00 here. Although the Catherdal does have a real midnight Mass. Do others still have "real" Midnight Masses?
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mrsgranola
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MaryM wrote:
Do others still have "real" Midnight Masses? |
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We do! I love it but I'm not sure how we're going to juggle it this year, either. DH is working nightshift thru Christmas so it's me and the 5 kiddos to figure it out.
Lots of bribery will be needed it they are awake!
JoAnna
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Martha in VA
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MaryM wrote:
| Do others still have "real" Midnight Masses? |
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Ours begins at midnight. I guess I'll never know how my gals will do unless we try it. 
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Martha
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We have caroling and so forth starting at 11, but the mass starts at midnight.
another tip that may or may not be acceptable to you...
we don't dress up for midnight mass. We're not in pj's or sweats, but we are very comfortable. Usually jeans and nice shirts. I find being comfortable makes a big difference in how well they handle the excitment, sugar high, schedule shift, and tiredness.
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Michaela
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MaryM wrote:
| Do others still have "real" Midnight Masses? |
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Our parish does not have a Midnight Mass.
There will be a 6pm and 10pm Mass.
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Bookswithtea
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kjohnson wrote:
| Services in the wee hours is just a given in our family. When we were Orthodox, we never missed the Pascha (Easter) service, which was always at midnight and lasted at least 3 hours, after which was a huge fast-breaking meal, which always put us back home around 4am. |
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I don't mean to hijack this thread, but at some point if you have time, I would love love love to hear your story...I've never known a convert from Orthodoxy to Catholicism. A dear friend of mine converted from Evangelicalism to Orthodoxy a few years after I converted to Catholicism (also from Evangelicalism).
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Martha in VA
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Bookswithtea wrote:
..I've never known a convert from Orthodoxy to Catholicism.
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Hi Books,
I certainly don't want to answer for Katherine but you can read part of her story which she posted in this
thread I started a few weeks back.
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kjohnson
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Bookswithtea wrote:
I don't mean to hijack this thread, but at some point if you have time, I would love love love to hear your story...I've never known a convert from Orthodoxy to Catholicism. A dear friend of mine converted from Evangelicalism to Orthodoxy a few years after I converted to Catholicism (also from Evangelicalism).
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I actually have time now. Since I can't sleep!
The story of our journey is long and drawn-out. Feel free to ask about particulars, but the digest version is that I was baptized Catholic as an infant. My parents didn’t raise me in the Church (no First Communion or Confirmation). My husband was raised Southern Baptist. Even though I wasn’t raised in the Church, my parents encouraged me to go to the Catholic university that they graduated from (University of Dallas). I met my husband there and received very sound theological formation (it’s one of the biggest reasons I’m Catholic today).
My husband decided to become Catholic as we were planning to be married in the Church. His semester in Rome and the theology classes were enough for him to know that Protestantism wasn’t it. But he had not yet fully accepted all of the teachings.
I became entranced with Catholic apologetics and read everything I could get my hands on (the days before homeschooling!). I thought I was rock-solid, but I was really just prideful and my husband was there, but mostly would drag his feet along. Then one day, POOF!, everything I once held dear and swore I would die for seemed to be questionable, and I was plagued by a horrible bout of scrupulosity. It was a dark night and complete spiritual torture.
But my temptations of doubt gave room for my husband to raise his objections (some of the Protestant doctrine is hard to shake off). That’s when we began looking eastward. It’s an easier transition from the Protestant faith…no papal authority, no Purgatory, lighter on the Marian doctrine. And with all of the liturgical abuses in the Catholic Church, the Divine Liturgy was like walking back in time and recalling how the ancient Christians worshiped.
We were all chrismated (dh, me and all 4 kids). We lost all of our Catholic friends and godfamily (except Jennifer (jdostalik) who is on this board too, and is a true friend), we lost our Catholic homeschooling group, everything. Our parish priest (who has since apologized) wouldn’t respond to my emails. It was terrible.
But it only took about a year to start seeing the problems within Orthodoxy. I can mostly sum up the problem as a lack of authority (a visible head) in Orthodoxy that leaves many opportunities for confusion in doctrine. Martha linked to another thread where I got into some detail. I could write a book!
Anyway, we spent another year discerning our return to the Catholic Church. It was the most depressing and confusing time in my life. And then we were roasted in the other direction…abandoned and betrayed by most of our Orthodox friends and godfamily. It was horrible to go through the same thing twice. But God really pruned us from being overly dependent on human approval in the process.
It was a hard and horrible experience, but I think it had to take something like that for God to purify me of many sins that separate me from Him. I have so far to go still, and it makes me cringe a bit to think of what it will take to continue to progress spiritually, but I have definitely learned that I can never take the gift of faith for granted. It really is purely grace. I had a head full of knowledge and the moment God withdrew, none of it meant anything. It’s something I never would have learned without experiencing the lack of grace. All I can say is that hell is very real and God is very good.
So I don’t know what to call myself. Convert? Revert? Disaster? Don’t try this at home? ...How about Catholic!
Quite a long "digest" version, huh?
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Bookswithtea
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Wow. What an amazing story. (I read the other thread too...thanks, Martha!).
Dh and I considered Orthodoxy...the jump is easier to make, theologically (in the end, it was the lack of universality due to a lack of magisterium that led us away). I know my friend who converted to Orthodoxy couldn't reconcile herself to a Pope, although Marian doctrine does not seem to bother her.
Its been weird. When I converted to Catholicism, she thought I was nuts but it wasn't a stumbling block. When she converted to Orthodoxy, things got squishier in some ways. I didn't see that coming, figuring we'd have more in common than not. But her distate for Catholicism grew as an Orthodox. Even sadder, she was baptized Catholic as a child. 
I've learned a lot from Frederica Matthewes Green's books over the years, despite her penchant for little digs into Western theology.
Its so so hard to lose friends over conversion! Disaster? No. You are brave.
Thank you so much for sharing.
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kjohnson
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Bookswithtea wrote:
Its been weird. When I converted to Catholicism, she thought I was nuts but it wasn't a stumbling block. When she converted to Orthodoxy, things got squishier in some ways. I didn't see that coming, figuring we'd have more in common than not. But her distate for Catholicism grew as an Orthodox. Even sadder, she was baptized Catholic as a child.
Its so so hard to lose friends over conversion!
Thank you so much for sharing. |
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You would think that the seemingly slight differences between the east and west would not be obstacles in a friendship, wouldn't you? That's what I thought until I experienced it. I can say that there are many Orthodox Christians with a true respect for the Catholic Faith, but at the same time I've never encountered such vehement, anti-western, anti-Catholicism in all my life (and I live in the deeply Protestant Bible Belt). I think that it's another reason it's a little easier of a jump for Protestant converts. Especially if the anti-Catholicism is deep-seated. One of our Orthodox godfamilies are converts from Evangelical Protestantism and they admitted that they were relieved to be able to tell their family during their conversion that "at least we aren't Catholic."
The schism was a nasty, nasty event. Definitely the workings of the Evil One. I hope that one day the east and west will be one again. Orthodoxy is so rich and beautiful, it's just incomplete since it is separated from its head. But I've held on to any of the eastern traditions that translated into western spirituality. And Jennifer, the angel that she is, researched a great deal into the beautiful eastern Catholic churches during our journey and has an incredibly gorgeous Icon wall in her family room. Oh, and it was the Servant of God, Catherine Doherty (a Catholic woman who grew up in an Orthodox and Catholic home) who Jennifer prayed to for our return. She is a powerful saint. I love her very much.
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Katherine
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Ruth
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Katherine, What an amzing story. Thanks for sharing it. I have wanted to know for a while about your return to the Catholic faith. Wow. You have suffered so much for the Faith, and now I see why told me once that we have to give prayers of thanksgiving for our faith. It makes so much sense now. God bless you and your family. What an example of faith and perseverance.
Have a Blessed Christmas. We are going to attempt midnight Mass tonight, but 4 of the kids and I are sick with a terrible cold. We're going to rest today and pray for a quick healing.
God bless.
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ALmom
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Back to midnight Mass with children. My dh commented - tell them what we really do . We have such a terrible schedule anyways (our mantra is always we're going to get on a better schedule as all the children get funny grins of we'll believe it when we see it) so midnight Mass is not much worse than our regular bedtime. However, don't try to get us moving in the AM. Our children sleep well past 11 on Christmas morning and we just go slowly. This year will be a bit rougher as we did the 7:30 AM Sunday Mass to be followed by Midnight Mass.
Actually, the youngest fall asleep during the caroling before Mass and it is so beautiful and quiet. When I was growing up, my mom and took took all 5 of us - every year. We even road our bikes to midnight Mass.
Janet
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Topic: Logistics of children at midnight mass?
