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Anonymous Forum Pro
Joined: Jan 21 2006
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Posted: Sept 05 2013 at 11:20pm | IP Logged
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Sadly our parish is getting more and more liberal and less welcoming to homeschoolers. WE have a new DRE who is insisting that homeschoolers use the materials that the CCD classes use (which I do not care for) and that all homeschooled kids meet with him once a month at a time that he has stipulated, so that he can test them to make sure they are keeping up with the curriclum. Prior to this we never had a problem - I would give a very detailed list of our preparation to the pastor and he always said he had no worries about our kids knowing the faith. I would love to hear from others who may have dealt with this (short of leaving the parish!!)
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guitarnan Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Maryland
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Posted: Sept 06 2013 at 12:02am | IP Logged
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We have not dealt with this exact situation, but I would like to share some thoughts with you as a former DRE and homeschooling parent.
Just because you have to use the materials your parish provides does not mean you can't also use the materials you prefer. It might take some extra time, but it's worth it - you're homeschooling with the intent to raise your children as faithful Catholics.
The monthly meetings/testing may very well fall by the wayside once your new DRE figures out that the homeschooled students know the material very, very well, compared to his weekly CCD students. We had an experience like this when our daughter was confirmed. She was so far ahead of everyone else in her Confirmation class (it was sad, really, and I wish that had not been the case); in the end, no one read her saint report or quizzed her on anything. Your new DRE is starting a CCD year in a new place, and he might end up needing to focus on other areas besides homeschoolers.
Familiarize yourself with your diocesan policies regarding homeschooing and faith formation. If the diocesan website does not mention monthly meetings/testing, you may be able to go to your pastor and request to be excused from this new process. In my diocese, there is a list of accepted textbooks on the website, and homeschoolers can use any books on the list. We don't have to use the parish selections.
Were I you, I would try to keep things confined to the parish level (in terms of avoiding this testing thing, and the curriculum you feel is less useful) until you have exhausted every possible avenue (including talking with your pastor). Once you know your diocesan policies, you can use them in your arguments, and your DRE is bound by those policies.
One thing that may be driving this DRE's bus is lack of knowledge. Seven years ago, I returned with my family to our "home" parish after a few years away. Our DRE did not know much about homeschooling, and I had to meet with her for quite a long time in order to explain our process, situation, sacramental preparation, etc. I had to show her that our books were on the approved list. I had to do a bunch of paperworky things as though I taught CCD instead of my own children. And...surprise!...I did all of the required things and they have since left me alone. Completely.
Translation: Start the process. Use their books and yours. Perhaps the new DRE will realize that his problems don't revolve around homeschoolers. If that doesn't happen, you can involve your pastor (best first choice) or try to work with the diocese to effect a fix.
I wish this process were easier. The new DRE has been dumped into a pre-existing program (he didn't get to order those textbooks...the predecessor did that!) and he still has to launch a working CCD program next month, etc. Both you and he need better communication opportunities. Give it time, and if things don't improve, then it's time to involve the Chancery Office.
__________________ Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Lara Sauer Forum All-Star
Joined: June 15 2007 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Sept 06 2013 at 7:40am | IP Logged
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Great reply, Guitarnan!
And, as St. Francis de Sales wisely said, you catch more flies with honey!
I'll say some prayers that all works out in the end.
Peace.
__________________ You can take the girl out of Wisconsin, but you can't take the Wisconsin out of the girl!
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pumpkinmom Forum All-Star
Joined: March 28 2012 Location: Missouri
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Posted: Sept 06 2013 at 9:48am | IP Logged
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Just be sure to check your diocese policy. We have had a DRE in the past that would state "rules" but our diocese didn't have a policy that backed up the DRE. As soon as someone said I don't have to do that she backed down and allowed it. Our diocese is very relaxed and doesn't require anything. I guess this isn't true everywhere.
__________________ Cassie
Homeschooling my little patch of Ds-14 and Ds-10
Tending the Pumpkin Patch
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KC in TX Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 05 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: Sept 16 2013 at 4:11pm | IP Logged
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pumpkinmom wrote:
Just be sure to check your diocese policy. We have had a DRE in the past that would state "rules" but our diocese didn't have a policy that backed up the DRE. As soon as someone said I don't have to do that she backed down and allowed it. Our diocese is very relaxed and doesn't require anything. I guess this isn't true everywhere. |
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I wish our diocese were like this. We've always had little problems with sacraments or CCD. I don't mind too much about checking to see if our children are learning, but that's not what our parish is doing. They want to make sure that our children are part of the community. We must prove, in order to receive an exemption from the preceding years before Confirmation, that said child is an active member of the wider parish. If they attend CCD then they don't have to do that. We are at every mass. We attend every Holy Day of Obligation. My daughters sing in the choir during daily mass. It's considered a formality, but it's not in the Diocesan policy. The policy is being written we are told. It's been a very upsetting few weeks.
__________________ KC,
wife to Ben (10/94),
Mama to LB ('98)
Michaela ('01)
Emma ('03)
Jordan ('05)
And, my 2 angels, Rose ('08) and Mark ('09)
The Cabbage Patch
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Barb.b Forum All-Star
Joined: June 22 2007
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Posted: Sept 16 2013 at 8:36pm | IP Logged
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Well, Tell him fine but he then needs to test the non homeschool students too! I also agree that you should do some checking. Last I checked the Catholic church supported faith formation at home!
Barb
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