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Maggie
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| Posted: July 07 2011 at 4:48pm | IP Logged
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Hi Moms~
My dd will turn 7 in early May 2012. We are still on the fence about if she is ready to receive FC or not.
Academically, she is all over the place...2nd grade reader...2nd grade math...extremely academically bright and intelligent.
BUT
She is a bit emotionally challenged. She is still prone to horrible tantrums and hits family members on a daily basis because she cannot communicate her feelings of frustration (even over the tiniest of things). This child puts me to tears most weeks because I just do not know what to do with her sometimes.
I was so convinced she had some sort of emotional/physical disorder, that I had her pediatrician and an occupational therapist do thorough examinations of her. Nothing.
Just incredibly willful, stubborn...(sigh).
BUT
She has a tremendously beautiful soul...since she was three she has been asking to receive FC...When she was two and a half, she threw a tantrum because she wanted to go to Confession and we would not let her. 
She loves her saints books and religious story books. She reads the story of "Little Nellie" to herself and loves "little kid" saints.
And yet...
She can behave extremely poorly at Mass...
Which to us means that she doesn't quite understand the gravity of the Consecration, etc?
But about half the time she is sooooo good at Mass and uses her Magnifikid as a guide and follows along very well.
It's the other half a time when she takes a swipe at her brother...or shouts/name calls during the Consecration.  I have been extremely humbled by her...you have no idea... Even last weekend my dh had to take her out of Mass for about 10 minutes...and I wish I could say that was uncommon...but she seems too big for such antics. But that is just her...
I have about 3 weeks to decide... as I think we have to "enroll" her in classes...
Any thoughts? Wisdom from anyone with emotionally challenged children?
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Wife to dh (12 years) Mama to dd (10) ds (8), dd (1), ds (nb) and to Philip Mary (5/26/09), Lucy Joy (12/6/09), and Margaret Mary (3/6/10) who entered Heaven before we had a chance to hold them.
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hylabrook1
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| Posted: July 07 2011 at 5:51pm | IP Logged
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The Eucharist is a gift; as such, it is given freely and with great love from God to us. As a sacrament, it is a source of grace. All of us, no matter what age, are in need of grace to grow in God's image.
IMHO, receiving the Eucharist can only help your daughter.
Peace,
Nancy
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lapazfarm
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| Posted: July 07 2011 at 6:01pm | IP Logged
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hylabrook1 wrote:
The Eucharist is a gift; as such, it is given freely and with great love from God to us. As a sacrament, it is a source of grace. All of us, no matter what age, are in need of grace to grow in God's image.
IMHO, receiving the Eucharist can only help your daughter.
Peace,
Nancy |
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Ditto that.
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Theresa
us-schooling in beautiful Fairbanks, Alaska.
LaPaz Home Learning
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JodieLyn
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Just what I was thinking too.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Maggie
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| Posted: July 07 2011 at 8:16pm | IP Logged
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It is so good to hear that from more experienced moms than myself. Wow! Thank you very much!
I really appreciate it!
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Wife to dh (12 years) Mama to dd (10) ds (8), dd (1), ds (nb) and to Philip Mary (5/26/09), Lucy Joy (12/6/09), and Margaret Mary (3/6/10) who entered Heaven before we had a chance to hold them.
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JennGM
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| Posted: July 07 2011 at 10:18pm | IP Logged
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Maggie,
Some of the things you describe are my son. But we proceeded and he received this May. There were times I just wasn't so sure, but I was convinced the grace of the Sacraments, to receive Jesus finally, would change things...and it has. He is so much more behaved and attentive at Mass. We have gone biweekly to confession (just because that's when I go) and he is so joyful. I see small areas of growth and maturity every day.
There is only a minimal requirement to receive the Blessed Sacrament. If she recognizes it is Jesus, and desires Him and has had the training, then don't hold back. I think so often the devil tries to put up barriers like this to talk us out of it and delay.
Praying for you and your daughter!
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: July 08 2011 at 6:03am | IP Logged
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I agree with Jennifer. I went through the same thoughts as you with my dd. She received this year and I also see little changes and improvements in her behavior. She would never use the holy water, give the sign of peace, sing or even do the sign of the cross during mass. I was so frustrated. But she is participating more now and gets so excited to go up to communion and receive with everyone.
You will make the right decision for your family--praying for you!
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Anne, married to dh 16 years!, ds,(97), Little One (02), and dd (02).
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SallyT
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| Posted: July 08 2011 at 2:39pm | IP Logged
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I'm the FHC catechist in our parish, in addition to preparing our own children. This year I had a parent -- a custodial grandmother, actually -- approach me with exactly the same question. The little girl concerned does have some diagnosable difficulties -- ADHD, etc -- and I had noticed that of all the children in my large class, she had the most trouble sitting still, focusing, and so on. I distinctly recall her melting down when we were making rosaries back in October; I just said, "OK, a single-decade rosary is great! You're done! Look how beautiful that is!"
Anyway, the grandmother was very concerned about her readiness to receive, afraid even that she would act out on the day (she was really terrified that the child would spit out the Body, not liking the taste; fortunately they get to practice with an unconsecrated host, so I could allay her fears a little about that).
I in turn confided in the DRE, because I honestly wasn't sure how to answer, beyond saying that if she didn't know her prayers (another concern of the grandmother's), they might try integrating them into their daily life at home -- you wish you didn't have to say things like that to people, but I always hope and pray that FHC class will be a catalyst for some evangelization of whole families, not just their second-graders. Anyway, the DRE very wisely observed that none of us is ever "ready," as in perfect, and that this child, like every child, *needed* to receive the Lord as soon as she could possibly do so.
She did, and she was as prepared and fine as any other child in the class, and as happy and proud. I don't know what went on in her heart, but I pray that Jesus has been working on her ever since, as of course He was before . . . I was certainly especially proud of her on that day. I haven't seen her since class ended, but she and all those other sweet children are in my prayers -- your post actually just reminded me to pray for them again!
Anyway, yes, I'd go for it. And I'll be praying for you. My strong-willed seven-year-old will be making her FHC this year, too (always a challenge to have my own child in my class!), so please pray for me, too!
Sally
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Erin
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Maggie
I often agonise over this very question, I'm in the midst of preparing my 6th child(dd7) to receive and re-visiting the whole issue. Every time I have discovered my children have a huge emotional/spiritual growth shortly after FHC. The Sacrament of Reconciliation will be a huge help for the issues your dd struggles with. One of my ds struggles with a quick temper, Reconciliation has been a real blessing in this area.
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Erin
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pmeilaen
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| Posted: July 10 2011 at 10:50pm | IP Logged
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I do honor what everybody else has said here, but I wait until my children are 9 before they receive the two sacraments. This is how it is done in Germany (where I am from) and I do think that the children have a better understanding of the sacraments when they are at this age, especially of the Sacrament of Reconciliation. My third daughter is 8 and a half and just recently I've noticed that she seems to really understand what conscience and sin is. I'm only saying this to show that some countries do it differently.
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Eva
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Jenn Sal
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| Posted: July 11 2011 at 1:32pm | IP Logged
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My daughter not only needed to be able to receive Our Lord, but also needed a way to be forgiven through Reconciliation. Your daughter sounds very similar to mine. I had the same questions, but saw this as yet another way to help her with her struggles. She still struggles, but now has the Gifts of forgiveness and His Body and Blood.  (she is with me now and wanted me to post that smiley face) In her words, "I feel so good after being forgiven. And every time I receive Him I feel peaceful."
You will do what's best for your child, no matter what you decide.
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Jennifer, Texas
Wife to Mark, Mom to Cora 13,Kade 10, Sarah in Heaven 12/05, Colette 7, Corin 5, & Kieran 2
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: First Communion and Emotional Readiness?
