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Angie Mc
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| Posted: April 21 2010 at 2:47pm | IP Logged
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Any links to Cathlic teaching or words of wisdom for a Catholic who needs to attend the funeral of a work collegue who is not Catholic? Not sure what kind of service or where it will be held...but want to be ready for different scenarios. Thank you.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Elena
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I don't know of any links, but I can tell you that I have attended non-Catholic funerals in the past. Most recently, I attended the funeral and burial service for my great-uncle who was 100 years old when he passed. The service was mostly some eulogies and sharing interspersed with some hymns and scripture.
The burial was surprising because my uncle had been cremated and they were going to bury the cremains. I thought they would bury the container that held the cremains, but instead they dumped them right into the pre-dug hole! and they invited each of us to come up and take turns dumping into the hole! That was strange and also kind of dusty!!  Definitely not something I was use to as a Catholic!
But you know, we just remained respectful and joined the rest of the mourners in sharing grief at our loss and joy at the happy memories, and i think that's really all you can do!
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stacykay
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I don't have any links, just personal experiences.
Non-Catholic funerals vary from faith to faith. I used to be Episcopal, and they generally have a funeral service, somewhat sort of similar to a Catholic one, in church. I have been to some that have had communion, for which, you would just stay in your pew. I have been to Episcopal funerals that were also held in the funeral home, itself.
My maternal grandparents were Baptist, and their funeral services were at the funeral home, as were a Methodist I was at, and a Presbyterian, oh, and two Lutheran funerals, too.
Usually, for the non-Episcopal ones, there were prayers, a scripture reading, a sermon, lots of music, and then some offered people an opportunity to say a few words about the deceased.
For the most part, everyone just sat at the ones I attended. You can be pretty invisible if you want. 
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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JodieLyn
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The main thing I think you might run into at a Christian but not Catholic funeral is the lack of prayers for the dead.
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JennGM
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Angie Mc wrote:
| Any links to Cathlic teaching or words of wisdom for a Catholic who needs to attend the funeral of a work collegue who is not Catholic? Not sure what kind of service or where it will be held...but want to be ready for different scenarios. Thank you. |
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Hi Angie!
I found a few for you:
CUF Faith Fact, Attending a Protestant Service
CUF Faith Fact, Attending a Non-Christian Service
Zenit: Participation in Protestant Events. This one cites the Ecumenical Directory published by the Holy See.
Diocese of Wheeling, Can Catholics attend Protestant Services
I think the main difference will be that it is a memorial, and like Jodie says, not praying for the person. Cremation is allowed in the Catholic faith (but not spreading the ashes).
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Jennifer G. Miller
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stacykay
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| Posted: April 22 2010 at 7:47am | IP Logged
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Here is a link to Episcopal funeral and the particular prayers for the funeral. Episcopals death services are called funerals if a body is present and a memorial if it is not.
Angie, do you know the faith of the Catholic's colleague?
Just a personal aside note...when my fil died back in 2000, it was the first death of someone very close to me who was also Catholic since I had converted back in '83. I vividly remember how comforted I felt by the anointing he received before he died and by the lovely funeral Mass. An intangible hard to describe, but I did not feel that same peace when my dear uncle passed away. I am SO thankful to have found my home!!!
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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Angie Mc
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| Posted: April 29 2010 at 11:13am | IP Logged
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Thank you very much for your help  .
The Catholic I referred to in the OP did attend what was "A Celebration of the Life" of the deceased at a Baptist affiliated church. There was a very large gathering because the deceased was young, outstanding, well-loved, popular and died suddenly, tragically, and accidentally. It was very emotional as one would imagine  .
I'll share one part of the service in the hopes that awareness may help others. After about an hour and 45 minutes of great outpouring of love and consolation, the pastor asked everyone to close their eyes and invited those in attendence to "stand up and be saved" in the name of the deceased, which lasted about 15 minutes. As a parent, I would want to have a plan in place for my Catholic children/teens/young adults, in case they find themselves at a similar service for their beloved friend. Young people are so vulnerable and so want to show there true friendship and may get confused. (The Catholic in th OP discreetly held and prayed a rosary during this time.)
Other than that clarification, the Catholic was privileged to attend this service and was very touched by the outpouring of song, prayer, testimony, emotion, and ultimate trust and joy in Christ that was shared that day.
Please pray for the deceased and all who are grieving deeply.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: attending funeral that isn't Catholic
