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LucyP Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 05 2007
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Posted: July 28 2009 at 5:46pm | IP Logged
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I have a friend of a different faith, which is sometimes thought to have a somewhat problematic relationship with the Church, coming to stay. I just looked round and realised that every room of our home has a crucifix, statue, holy picture, holy water font, rosary, holy card display, 1001 pictures of Jesus or Mary or a saint by our children, religious books, Bibles, prayers written out and pinned up...she knows we are commited Christians but still I wonder if this may be too much for her.
Would you tone it down? Or will that send a wrong message to our two children? What about just removing the religious elements from the bedroom she will be sleeping in?
I am PROUD to be a Catholic but I don't want it to seem obnoxious to her....
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Michaela Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 25 2005 Location: Washington
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Posted: July 29 2009 at 12:30am | IP Logged
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I'd certainly tidy my home and even cook meals that I thought would make my friend's stay more comfortable , but I wouldn't change how I've decorated it.
Whether it's my "holy reminders" or if I had an odd collection of pink cows and green bunnies in the kitchen my friend couldn't stand (i don't ).....the personal touches in my home...your home....reflect who we are.
Would you do it every time someone who doesn't agree with being Catholic comes into your home?
__________________ Michaela
Momma to Nicholas 16, Nathan 13, Olivia 13, Teresa 6, & Anthony 3
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Carole N. Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 28 2006 Location: Wales
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Posted: July 29 2009 at 3:14am | IP Logged
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We have had visitors to our home who are not Catholic and I don't change anything in our decor. My ds' best friend came to visit from the States for over three weeks and he shared ds' room. Yes, we cleared the clutter, but we did not remove any of his Catholicity from the room (icons, cruxifixes, pictures of John Paul II).
As Michaela said, your home is a reflection of who you are and you shouldn't have to change it. I know that it is hard in this secular society we live in, but there is nothing obnoxious about the Catholic items in your home. Perhaps you could look at them as an opportunity to evangelize by explaining (if asked of course) what the significance of the item is.
"Few Americans hate the Catholic Church, but millions hate what they think is the Catholic Church" --Bishop Fulton Sheen
I think that this is good to keep in mind because there is a lot of misrepresentation about the Catholic Church in this country. Remember Henry VIII and Cromwell?
Finally, I have also worked very hard to make my home reflect my Catholicism. I had a friend in the States who once said that my home looked more Catholic than the church we attended at the time. I took this as a compliment.
I hope that you have a good visit with your friend.
__________________ Carole ... in Wales
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Mary G Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: July 29 2009 at 6:01am | IP Logged
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I wouldn't change a thing ... it can be an opening to discussion and a bit of evangelization or correcting of misconceptions (which are amazingly ripe in many non-Catholic faiths). We went to BJU to view their Sacred Art collection (much of which is CATHOLIC) with a high school group ... and dh had to explain the symbolism (in a very nice, humble way) and so taught the curator some very valuable information about his own collection!
My dh's family is all non-Catholic and we've brought them to Mass, explained church doctrine, they've shared in our feasts and dh's dad (who SHOULD be Catholic) is coming closer and closer to coming back.
__________________ MaryG
3 boys (22, 12, 8)2 girls (20, 11)
my website that combines my schooling, hand-knits work, writing and everything else in one spot!
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KauaiCatholic Forum All-Star
Joined: April 25 2009 Location: Hawaii
Online Status: Offline Posts: 535
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Posted: July 29 2009 at 10:13pm | IP Logged
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Lucy, I was thinking of you today as I cleaned our home for a first visit from a new friend. she's a very sweet homeschooler with 3 DC, same ages as mine, who is due the same month as me, so we have lots to talk about and plenty in common.
oh, except she happens to be Hindu. now THAT'S a religion I know next to nothing about. I'm hoping I don't step on her toes, so to speak, without even realizing it.
anyway, I said a prayer for you ... as I picked up around our extremely Catholic looking home.
everyone gave you such good advice already, all I wanted to add was that I think it was very sweet of you to be so concerned about your friend's comfort while in your home. prayers for a wonderful, blessed visit!
__________________ Viviane
Grateful mama of Jonah Augustine ('01), Sophia Marie ('05) and Luke Dominic ('10)
We can do no great things; only small things with great love. -- Blessed Teresa of Calcutta
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Mackfam Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline Posts: 14656
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Posted: July 30 2009 at 6:54am | IP Logged
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Oh, Lucy! You have such a beautiful hospitable heart! You're very sensitive to want to make your home pleasing and comfortable for your friend!
I do agree with others in that I wouldn't change a thing in your home! Actually, it sounds a lot like the decor in my home! It would say something confusing to the children I think. Let your walls speak. There is no need to apologize for the beautiful way you have set out holy reminders and have permeated the culture of your family with beautiful and lovely items to act as prayerful reminders throughout your home.
You have no way of knowing if the Holy Spirit will use one of those simple items to plant a seed for this friend that may, in years to come, yield fruit.
Your home is a beautiful example of a vibrant, faith-filled home! It sounds absolutely lovely!
Praying your visit with your friend is delightful!!!
__________________ Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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Becky Parker Forum All-Star
Joined: May 23 2005 Location: Michigan
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Posted: July 30 2009 at 9:22am | IP Logged
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Just wanted to say that at one time I was very "luke warm" about my Catholic Faith. We visited a family of Catholic Homeschoolers and their home was very decorated with beautiful images of the Sacred Heart, the Immaculate Heart of Mary, crucifixes, rosaries, pictures of saints etc. It lead to curiosity on my part which in turn brought me back to the Faith in all it's truth and beauty.
__________________ Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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LucyP Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 05 2007
Online Status: Offline Posts: 791
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Posted: July 30 2009 at 1:37pm | IP Logged
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My friend has now gone home. It was a difficult visit as we were both emotionally exhausted before it began, and she is adjusting her body clock after years living in New York. She found parts really hard - like the children giving her religious books to read to them, and our prayers at meal times (we did the other prayers in private while she was here) - and as part of the conversation it came up that her former partner is catholic anyway, which astonished me, as even though she is secular she always said she was only interested in relationship with people from her own faith. So who knows what may happen?!
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