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nissag
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| Posted: Oct 20 2007 at 5:22pm | IP Logged
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Ugh... We've spent the last few months locking horns with our DRE. She did NOT want Catherine confirmed because she's 2 years younger than most of the kids in our Parish. However, we asked for a meeting with Father and he said that she could be confirmed.
NOW, she is requiring all confirmation kids to attend "Silver Ring Thing". I think it may be fine for public schooled kids, but we are absolutely against Catherine attending any form of outside s*x ed, especially since we, as parents, are not invited to preview the material.
We have our own very definite ideas of how our children should receive chastity, marriage, family life, and health information and training.
I'm asking for advice and prayers for this situation. I'm so angry that I could spit nails and I really don't want to confront the DRE in this state because I'm afraid I'd be extremely uncharitable.
Blessings,
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Nissa
Deacon's wife, mother of eleven, farmer, teacher, creator, cook.
At Home With the Gadbois Family
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guitarnan
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| Posted: Oct 20 2007 at 5:30pm | IP Logged
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Nissa,
I will pray for you, definitely. I would be irate if I could not preview the material. Why can't you see it? Does your diocese have a policy on this type of program (ours does, and we could preview the material if we wanted to...and in our previous diocese, parents HAD to preview it, particularly if they opted out)?
I think you have a strong case for not having your daughter attend, based on her age (although I realize that is a sore spot for the DRE). My guess is that you will have to get your pastor involved.
Be persistent in prayer...see this Sunday's readings for inspiration!
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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nissag
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| Posted: Oct 20 2007 at 5:51pm | IP Logged
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Thanks Nancy! This s*x and drug education thing is why we pulle dour kids out of the program several years ago. If she thinks it needs teaching, she tends to usurp the parents and just plan it. Then she has to deal with irate parents like me. 
I don't know why Father gives her such free reign. It makes no sense, but it's his parish. I'll make sure we tell him that Cate will be opting out of this program.
I think that the reason we can't review the program first is that it's a sort of convention-style program rather than a CCD based program.
Our entire RE program is a nightmare for middle school and up. The DRE decided that RE in the traditional sense was not required and decided that "The Edge" and "Life Teen" would suffice.
Both programs are fine social groups for kids, but have next to no content. And for kids who need traditional RE, and are not really deeply rooted in Faith, it's potentially dangerous if the leaders are not solid enough to explain everything.
Like I said... mess. 
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Nissa
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guitarnan
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| Posted: Oct 20 2007 at 8:40pm | IP Logged
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Oh, I wish your DRE knew our youth minister...he's big on LT and the Edge, but only as an add-on to RE...his Confirmation retreat last year was a real spiritual gift for my son.
Your DRE also needs to realize that not all middle and high school age kids LIKE big social groups (my son does not), and that high school age kids really thrive on learning the truths of our faith. Prayer, music and adoration are all awesome, but there needs to be some real classroom time where teens learn just what's expected of them as Catholics. (And...they love it when they find out that there really are rules and that they need to live up to them. Teens want limits. They know, deep down, they're not totally grown up.)
Sigh. I can entirely empathize with your concerns.
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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jdostalik
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| Posted: Oct 22 2007 at 8:05am | IP Logged
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nissag wrote:
.
Our entire RE program is a nightmare for middle school and up. The DRE decided that RE in the traditional sense was not required and decided that "The Edge" and "Life Teen" would suffice.
Both programs are fine social groups for kids, but have next to no content. And for kids who need traditional RE, and are not really deeply rooted in Faith, it's potentially dangerous if the leaders are not solid enough to explain everything.
Like I said... mess. |
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We have a similar situation with our middle school/high school age children at our parish. The youth ministers call it an "experiential model" of learning....we opted out with our pastor's approval, also. But it was traumatic, I am still recovering. Many prayers for you, dear Nissa....
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God Bless,
Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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mimmyof5
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| Posted: Oct 22 2007 at 9:14am | IP Logged
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jdostalik wrote:
[QUOTE=nissag] .
Our entire RE program is a nightmare for middle school and up. The DRE decided that RE in the traditional sense was not required and decided that "The Edge" and "Life Teen" would suffice.
Both programs are fine social groups for kids, but have next to no content. And for kids who need traditional RE, and are not really deeply rooted in Faith, it's potentially dangerous if the leaders are not solid enough to explain everything.
Like I said... mess. |
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Ours is the same. Everything you said could apply to ours. A mess. I have no answers. Wish I could find some before my 10 year old enough for confirmation. And opting out doesn't seem an option without a huge fight. I do think it is important we speak up thought. Otherwise, things will never change.
Janet
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stacykay
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Nissa,
I went to your link for the "SRT" and looked at their descriptions of what they do. Is your dre planning on attending one of their "shows" or getting the packet to do at the church?
Has the dre or your priest read the "SRT" statement of faith? They are obviously a sola scriptura group. I would be concerned about what else is against Catholic church teaching, especially since this is a Confirmation class. Maybe this would be a helpful "in" with your priest, regarding the use of this program.
The follow-up program looked questionable, also. Especially talking about prayer, not "repeating prayers".
Maybe make a suggestion to use a Catholic approved speaker, like Jason Evert. He has spoken in our area, many times. One of the moms in my group organized it, for him to speak here, in the Detroit area. She just had to call around to assorted Catholic schools and parishes, get a certain number to confirm, and he came. He was in huge demand, there were many who wanted him to speak that didn't get on the schedule. He is more for high school kids, but I don't think he is at all inappropriate, in any way, shape, or form for the younger ones.
But, lastly, what are your diocese's requirements for confirmation. They should be able to send them to you. I certainly don't think this SRT would come close to their requirements. Personally, I refused to send our oldest two ds to a weekend overnight (coed), that our dre tried to say was "required." Boys and girls, all weekend, overnight, with very little supervision?, no way! was my answer. Both were confirmed without further protest.
Hope this all helps! Prayers!
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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nissag
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| Posted: Oct 22 2007 at 9:51pm | IP Logged
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She's planning on making all of the kids go to the live program. The postcasrd she gave my daugher claims that it is the "Catholic version". Whatever that means...
She sent home a letter saying it was required for confirmation. Then during Mass announcements, she said she'd leave it to the individual parents' discretion. THEN, my daughter got home and said that she told the kids that she expected all of the kids to be there and that if they (or their parents) had a problem, to come talk to her. She's often doing this type of thing.
Bottom line: Brian and I refuse to abdicate our responsibility to teach our child what she needs to know about chastity. We're not sending Cate, we're not discussing it with her. And she can't withhold Confirmation. Only the bishop can do that. Of course, if Father had told us that Cate wasn't ready, we would aboslutely respect that.
I don't know how you can say that a child is not ready to receive confirmation because she hasn't attended a s*x ed 2.5 hour extravaganza complete with light show. I wonder what these kids come out of there like? Sounds like a dangerous concept... Call me crazy. 
And Nancy, you were right on about yesterday's readings. I intend to nag the judge, until I get justice!
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Nissa
Deacon's wife, mother of eleven, farmer, teacher, creator, cook.
At Home With the Gadbois Family
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Problems with DRE
