Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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SallyT
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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 11:21am | IP Logged Quote SallyT

I'm looking for strategies to help my 9yo son focus while doing copywork. His handwriting isn't bad, but is still a little laborious; what really drags out his copywork, though, is that he stops between words to stare into space, talk to his sister, get up out of his chair, etc, then forgets where he was in the copywork, starts on the wrong word, has to erase . . .

I don't let copywork last longer than 10 minutes (usually it's more like 5), and he's typically writing 2-4 lines, depending on the length of the passage he's copying (2 longer lines, or 4 shorter poetry-type lines). I am wanting to push him to write more fluently, ie to keep it moving forward smoothly without either agonizing over every letter or getting lost between words because he's off in la-la land. Ultimately I'd like him to be able to copy longer passages at a time, but for now I'd be happy just to keep him moving through shorter and more manageable pieces.

Suggestions for any strategies to keep him focused, beyond my saying, "Focus!" every two seconds, would be greatly appreciated.

Sally

PS:

We're copying poems, short passages from the Psalms, and passages from books we like (he just did a couple of 2-3 sentence paragraphs from The Lord of the Rings, because he loves LOTR). The content of the work he's copying doesn't seem to affect his level of distraction at all, though I do pay attention to his likes and dislikes and try to choose passages that he'll enjoy writing and remembering.

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 11:57am | IP Logged Quote Mackfam

Boy can I empathize with you, Sally!!

I've read that some kids, boys especially, (and especially at this age!!!) are SUPER, SUPER distractible! I've also read that this does improve with maturity, so it's something we just have to ride out for a bit. I find both of these to be true for my son; I see his ability to focus improving each year. Whew!!!!!

So, you're already doing a reasonable selection for a short timed period and those are biggies. Beyond that, I had a couple of other ideas to share with you! I had to approach this from two angles to help my son build this habit!

1) Evaluate (and I mean to the nth degree!!!!) his physical space where he does his copywork. Sit down in his chair where he works sometime when it's fairly quiet. Look at ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING!!! It's been my experience that the more the visual clutter in their immediate physical surrounding, the less their ability to concentrate. So, I had to remove posters, post-its, superfluous folders, stacks of books....you get the idea. Don't forget to look at the chair and floor!!! If the chair rocks --> distraction. Uneven floor --> distraction. Strange texture on the wall --> distraction. I know it seems crazy, but it's like sensory overload for these boys and they HAVE GOT TO TOUCH/INVESTIGATE/KNOW/UNDERSTAND RIGHT.THAT.MINUTE!!!!!!    Anyway, my whole purpose in pointing out this angle is that after I sat down and COMPULSIVELY removed, smoothed out, addressed some obvious physical distractions, my son's ability to focus was better. He is still very distracted if his surrounding spaces get too *busy* with stuff. Not in a *can't function* way...in a *Oh, I must go and see how this works if I put this on top of this and what happens if I rearrange this thing to do this....and on and on* sort of way.

2) Keyword to focus. You already mentioned the word *focus*, and that has been one of our keywords before, but we've also used words like *pencil*, and *eyes* and giving a neutral update on the time left in a given activity...like, "5 minutes left in copywork". I found that more neutral words work better for prompting the habit of attention in something like this. When I say focus (even if I say it in a neutral way), it's a command-reminder. When I say pencil, it's just an object, but it's an oral prompt that re-jogs brain cells back to pencil-->paper-->copywork. The time prompt is something that may or may not work with some kids and could really backfire with some temperaments...so I mention it as something to consider, but you probably instantly have a sense of whether or not this could be a tool or a hindrance, knowing your son best! For my son, it's about helping him visualize that he is nearing the end of this time, and it's that prompt to re-focus and work. It works well for him because a sense of time for this kid=order, and visualizing where he is within order helps him stay on task. I've had more success with neutral prompts so I thought I'd pass that along to try.

We're only 2 years ahead of you now, my son is 11, but I can see a lot of improvement over the last two years, so hang in there for a little maturity, too!! Hope this is a help! I'll be listening in here as well in case there are some other ideas I can try!

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 12:23pm | IP Logged Quote organiclilac

Sigh... we are having this problem, too. Like, my son has taken 2 hours to do one math page. I have tried the "DO YOUR MATH" every 5 minutes approach, I have tried the "Take as long as you want, you just get less playtime" approach. Nothing seems to help. I will have to try to declutter his workspace and see if that helps, but he usually just gazes out the window, at the ceiling, at his pencil (see, he's got no problem being focused on his pencil!)... completely lost in thought. He is a daydreamer. Or a doodler. When he does give me his math (or whatever he's been working on) it's often covered with pictures. I am at my wit's end!

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 12:37pm | IP Logged Quote jawgee

Relieved to hear others are finding this an issue, too. My 9YO struggles with this, too, especially while he's doing math (since he does so indepentantly and I'm not there to keep him on track every second).

Hmmm, declutter. There's a thought. Thanks for the idea about non-command reminders, too, Jen. I don't like to say "focus" because I feel like I am being a drill sergeant. Maybe another keyword will help remind him.

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 3:04pm | IP Logged Quote Erin

I wonder if playing soft, calming, music as they write would be soothing? My oldest ds who was my most distracted when younger has taken to wearing headphones and listening to music as he works. (although not necessarily calm music, I do have to attend to that ) He however does claim it helps him concentrate and I have read studies to support this.

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 3:09pm | IP Logged Quote SuzanneG

My oldest daughter is like this. I've done different things at different times.......

:: looking at her space, like Jen mentioned above. The rest of my girls are fine at tables with each other or a table facing OUT or at a couch. She is not. For 10 minutes of copywork, she goes in a specific place (a table facing a blank wall) with one pencil and her copywork. No one was allowed in that room for 10 minutes, which is a total hassle and pain in the bum (b/c we don't have a million rooms in our house), but doing this for a year has paid off, and we no longer have to do it.

:: I needed to be present and available to supervise from afar. No getting distracted with other things. Very hard.

:: The one-word reminders really DO work. I say "copywork" or "paper please" if I see her looking around. I say "legs" if her legs start making all kinds of contortions that don't lend themselves very well to writing-on-paper. If she is wrapping her fingers in various ways around the pencil (instead of writing) I say "fingers." I try NEVER to form full sentences in this instance. Less is always better.

:: All of this is talked about ahead of time, explaining that I am NOT picking on her. I am just helping her to focus for a very short amount of time, which is important that she learn. And, make sure she knows that it's not actually the FINISHED PRODUCT that I'm looking at....I could CARE LESS about the handwriting....I want to see the short-focused-work-time. Of course, the handwriting is GREAT when she focuses!

:: I give my husband the task of further explaining to her WHY it's important...he's much better at it than I am. He loves to talk and give examples of all the things you'll have to FOCUS on.....once he even came up with "if you can't focus, you'll never be able to put hot rollers in your hair by yourself!"    

:: And, we also make sure she knows that most other things she can DO however she likes, as long as she gets it done...ie" don't care if you're hanging upside down during reading, or clapping your hands in the air while thinking about a math problem (as long as it's not disturbing anyone).    

:: I have also had others supervise the copywork at different times. We went through about a month time period where that was what this child did with dad about 4 nihgts/week. 5 minutes of copywork with dad sitting right there. I gave him the "drill"....how to handle, what to watch for, etc. He was very unemotional about it and it was no-nonsense cuz it was dad. And, it gave me the needed break. It was very very helpful. Did it cut into family time and change our evening routine? Yes, but so very worth it.    

And, it's also something my mom always does when she is here for a couple weeks a few times/year.

I've also had others help...my daughter went over to a neighbor's house every day first thing in the morning and sat for 5 minutes and did her copywork.

:: of course, there is always food.    "If you can copy this sentence in your best handwriting before the timer goes off, we'll have those caramel rolls we made this morning!"   

After about a year of these "emergency measures"...we've made definite improvements. Is it perfect? No. But, from the preveious year....miles ahead!

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 4:42pm | IP Logged Quote organiclilac

Erin wrote:
I wonder if playing soft, calming, music as they write would be soothing? My oldest ds who was my most distracted when younger has taken to wearing headphones and listening to music as he works. (although not necessarily calm music, I do have to attend to that ) He however does claim it helps him concentrate and I have read studies to support this.


This does help keep my son from talking/singing to himself, but not from daydreaming and doodling. He just has good days and bad days when it comes to those, and I can't figure out what makes the difference.

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Posted: Oct 25 2011 at 9:11pm | IP Logged Quote SallyT

These are all such great suggestions. It's really not working to have him at the table with his sister, and our schoolroom has gotten very cluttered in the last couple of weeks, too. He could be in the kitchen and be far less distracted (even though the kitchen's hardly a blank slate of a space . . . still, I think the quiet and the removal from his sister during copywork time would help).

We already do play quiet music, though even that, I think, is distracting for him. He tends to start imagining a story for the music, and then to act it out . . . which is great, but not when you're trying to copy a sentence. I think that somehow we're also going to have to have "creative listening" time in our day.

Erin, my 13yo also listens to music through earbuds while he works, and I know it's not "calm!" As long as he gets 'er done, I'll grant him his musical choices . . .

I like the non-command idea. It's true that what I really want to do during these sessions is to scream, "LOOK AT THE PAPER AND WRITE THE WORDS!" Obviously I need some neutral here. This kid does have a fairly thick skin -- his sister is the one who is quick to feel picked on, whereas he just kind of goes, "Yeah, yeah . . . " On the other hand, he also has perfectionist tendencies -- his idea of "focus" is to obsess over the formation of a single letter -- which I don't want to exacerbate. My objective is smooth, fluent, non-stop writing, but experience tells me that it's going to take a long time to get there, so I really do have to rein in my own impatience, as well as helping him to keep his focus.

Thanks, everyone, and keep it coming!

Sally

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Posted: Oct 26 2011 at 7:49am | IP Logged Quote Marie

My guy is only 6 so a little different age but still really distracted. We often race the clock - I set the timer for a certain time and see if he can get done before then. It still has to be careful work but being so competitive it really works for him!


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Posted: Oct 27 2011 at 12:42am | IP Logged Quote Willa

Sally, my 8 year old son used to do exactly the same thing when he was supposed to sit down for piano practice. It took him 30 minutes to do about 10 minutes of practice.   

I think the suggestions you have already gotten are great; I just have a theory that this is how little boys cope with being slightly overwhelmed. They have to focus all those large-motor movements down to a small point.   

The piano primer had some preparation rituals that young pianists could do before starting to play -- to help them make their arms limp, their posture straight and so on. This sort of thing. I found that doing these helped him get into a piano frame of mind, sort of like a bedtime ritual, or a prayer preparation type thing.

My son's OT also usually has him do some warming up/stretching ritual before he starts writing. This gets the sensory things in line so the kid isn't dealing with too much input to filter.

These help a little and so did just patiently getting him back on task again and again with a word or touch.

The thing is that once habit finally kicks in, they do a little better.   They see what they can accomplish and find it easier to stay on task a little longer. Or so I have found, though some days are better than others.



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Posted: Oct 27 2011 at 7:35am | IP Logged Quote SallyT

Thanks again, all, and Willa, I think you're right about boys and being overwhelmed. It's one of those things that, as long as I'm not really overloading him (and I can tell when I am, believe me! He's not a shy, retiring child), I think we just have to move through as best we can, on our way to forming a good habit.

Yesterday was better: I gave both children passages from a little story taken from the "Mr. Adjective" chapter of Grammar-land, which we're reading and liking. I had them both circle the adjectives on my copy (I write their copywork on the left-hand pages of their Mead Primary Journals, and they write their copies on the right-hand pages), and draw arrows to the nouns they modified, then copy. His was one long sentence, and I assigned half of it for yesterday. I don't know whether it was the warm-up of looking for adjectives and talking about them, or what, but he did work pretty steadily. Also, we cleaned off our cluttered work table before starting school -- I decided to try that before moving him to another room altogether. So maybe that helped.

Thanks again, and keep the good suggestions coming! I'm seeing that this is a pretty universal condition, wherever there are 9yo boys, so hopefully this will be a more or less universally helpful conversation.

Sally

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Posted: Oct 27 2011 at 7:36am | IP Logged Quote SallyT

And I think I know those piano books, Willa. I believe they're sitting on my piano . . . those limp-noodle arms, those curved hands . . .

Sally

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Posted: Oct 27 2011 at 10:00pm | IP Logged Quote Willa

SallyT wrote:
Thanks again, all, and Willa, I think you're right about boys and being overwhelmed. It's one of those things that, as long as I'm not really overloading him (and I can tell when I am, believe me! He's not a shy, retiring child), I think we just have to move through as best we can, on our way to forming a good habit.


That's how I approach it too. I figure the overwhelm is manageable but the boy is just needing a little help to overcome it.

Part of becoming a young man....



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