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Jen L.
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You may remember that my sister is fighting an aggressive and deadly form of brain cancer.
She had her second surgery in March and the doctors were happy with the results. Happy is relative in the world of glioblastomas. She started in a clinical trial at NIH immediately after the surgery but it didn't work for her. As soon as the tumor began to regrow, they took her off the trial.
Now she has started in a second NIH trial. She is taking Avantin (a form of chemo) every 2 weeks. It has the possibility of many side effects, including a ruptured blood vessel and almost immediate death. She struggled with whether accepting this treatment would be not showing enough faith in God, but decided it was for the best. She knows that God can heal her and she has been counseled that it is hers to claim. The downside to this counsel is that she puts the blame on herself that God hasn't healed her yet. 
If you have any words that I could give her as to why she is not to blame, I would greatly appreciate it.
Please pray for her physical, mental, and spiritual well-being.
__________________
Jen
dh Klete,ds (8/95),dd (12/97), dd (11/00), and ^2^ in heaven
"...the best state in which to glorify God is our actual state; the best grace is that of the moment..." St. Peter Eymard
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Rebecca
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I am praying for your sister, Jen. 
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Angie Mc
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Our family is praying, Jen. I'll be thinking of things to say that may comfort your sister. In general I'm thinking that healing comes in many forms, not just physical (spiritual, emotional, etc.) Think of the man lowered through Peter's roof, Jesus forgave his sins first (spiritual,) then to reveal himself (God's will,) healed him physically. I'm also reminded that it is for God to choose to heal or to choose to allow us to carry a cross and we, as His creations, must only trust His judgement. We most certainly need to pray for what we want and hold onto hope while ultimately wanting what God wills most (think of Jesus in the Garden.) This is such difficult work.
Perhaps what your sister needs are simple words from you with a lot of love. Perhaps she just needs to be reminded that none of this is her fault...that she is doing great under incredibly difficult circumstances...that you are proud of all that she has done to cooperate with healing...that you love her.
You are a good sister and this must be so hard. I'm praying for you too, Jen.
Love,
__________________
Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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teachingmom
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Praying, Jen!
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Elizabeth
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This is such a Catch-22 in the world of mind-body-spirit conections.If you believe that you aren't powerless--that both faith and a proactive outlook on health can impact your outcome--you are in the position of thinking sometimes that you have more control than you do. If I just did a better job of controlling negative thoughts...If I just had more faith than a mustard seed...If I just were more diligent with these novenas...
But it's not like that. We have to pray for the grace to accept His will. God wants us to conform His will to ours. That's really hard when it comes down to living or dying. He's waiting for us to pray for the right thing and when we do, He always answers affirmatively. That doesn't mean you don't tell him how much you want to live, but it does mean that you follow that with the earnest request for the grace to live as He wants you to. God can heal her and it is hers to claim, but that healing isn't always physical. God will heal her in a way that is best for her soul if that's what she asks Him to do. Catholics done't adhere to the "name it-claim it" spirituality for wealth. Nor can we bank on it for physical health.
Jen, this conversation isn't any easy one to have. And holding someone's hands in the months before they are likely to die is a really hard thing. One thing I've learned very recently is that people who are dying need someone safe to talk to about dying. I learned that I was the only one who would let Nicole talk about what she wanted for her children should she die. Everyone else was so focused on "not losing hope" that they wouldn't entertain conversations about death. In the reality of dying--when a dying person has a face that is dear to you--it's hard to let the conversation go there. But it's imperative for peace and for the proper preparation of the soul.
It's like annointing of the sick. When you get annointed, it doen't mean you've given up and are preparing to die. It means you are reaching out for God's healing, whatever He wills that to look like. Often, after annointing, we are physically healed. And then everyone says what a miracle it is to be healed. But sometimes, there is no physical healing. Instead there is a spiritual reconciliation with the Creator and a total peace for the soul.How many people do you know who are completely reconciled with our Lord and at peace in their souls? That is certianly no less a miracle.
God will answer her prayers mightily if she can bring herself to pray that His will be done.
And I'm praying for you.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Dawn
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Jen, I wish I had words for you and your sister. I cannot imagine how hard this must be for you all. Please know we are praying for her (and you).
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KellyJ
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How sad. I am praying.
KellyJ
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stefoodie
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Praying for your sister, Jen. And you too.
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stef
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alicegunther
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Jen,
I would not have the strength to come up any words to help her. I just want to hold her hand and cry with her as she faces this horrible trial. Please let your sister know we are praying for her and thinking about her.
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stacykay
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Jen,
please know that I am praying also, although I don't have the words for you to give to your sister. I will pray for her to learn and accept God's will, whichever way it goes, to not feel that she isn't ?good? enough if physical healing isn't part of the plan, and to be so close to Him.
Praying for you and your dear sister.
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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momwise
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Jen,
I'm so sorry to hear this. Angie and Elizabeth have touched on something great: namely healing takes place when we pray for it...period. It is up to God what form of healing takes place.
do you think she would find support in the journal entries of the Logues? They were the couple in SD that appreared on the Three Wishes television show last year. Bill experienced a huge improvement for several months and just last week they found the tumor is growing again. I find so much inspiration in their trust for God's plan and their willingness to become holy according to His designs.
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esperanza
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Jen,
I'll be praying for your sister and family.
"Compassion is hard because it requires the inner disposition to go with others to the place where they are weak, vulnerable, lonely and broken." -Henri Nouwen
God Bless you Jen, for being there for your sister.
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In His Peace,
Tammy Gonzalez in VA
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Wendy
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Praying for both of you.
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God bless,
Wendy
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Cay Gibson
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Praying, Jen. What a heavy cross for both of you.
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Cay Gibson
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ladybugs
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You will all be in our prayers.
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Love and God Bless,
Maria P
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jdostalik
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Jen,
Praying for your dear sister and for peace and acceptance of God's holy will. You are a great sister; she is blessed to have you.
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God Bless,
Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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Marybeth
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Jen,
I don't have any words of comfort for your sister. Please know I am praying for her and you as you carry this heavy cross. I am so sorry.
Marybeth
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shartlesville
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Praying!
Krisann
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guitarnan
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Jen,
Many prayers are headed Heavenward for your sister and for you.
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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ALmom
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Jen, Praying for your sister and all your family.
Janet
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4Real Forums : We Pray to the Lord
Topic: UPDATE: My sister’s brain tumor
