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Carole N. Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 28 2006 Location: Wales
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 3:33pm | IP Logged
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I just spoke with my mother. Today marks the 2nd anniversary of the death of my father. She is not doing well. In fact, she is so sad and I believe she just wants to die. She sees no need to go on in life. I feel so helpless. I wish I could be at home to help her. Please pray for my mother to have some peace in her life. Thank you for your prayers!
Update
I wish that I had good news, but I think that her health is worse. A very close friend of the family has contacted me to tell me that mom is not eating much, not really getting out of bed and can barely walk more than a few steps. Apparently, she is in a lot of pain.
I just spoke with her and she had to leave to go to bed. We talked for less than five minutes, but she could not remember the first part of the conversation. She repeated that my brother was taking her to the doctor for some pain medication. I think that she was drinking (she is an alcoholic). It is 10:30 in the morning there.
I don't know what to do except ask for continued prayer. I know that she is sad about my father, but I had hoped she would move into assisted living and get some help. Unfortunately, she may be beyond that at this point. Please continue to pray for my mom. Thank you so much.
Update 2
It always helps to speak with someone in the family. I talked with my brother yesterday. Mom is definitely confused and she is not taking care of herself. But my brothers are arranging to move her into assisted living or a small apartment in a community.
They are looking at a place that sounds wonderful. It has physical therapy, a beauty salon, a deli, and an occasional lunch at Matt's El Rancho (it is a great Mexican food place). Can you tell that food is primary in my life (lol)?
Of course, mom can be stubborn. She probably won't want to move, but my brother has said that after she is up and moving around, he will move her back to the house. We don't think that she will go back, however, she will be having too much to do. She can be a very social person.
I told my brother that I could come over now, but he told me to wait until mom was better and moving around a bit. Okay, he sounded so hopeful (although he does not believe in God).
I will place it all in His hands. Continuing to pray...
__________________ Carole ... in Wales
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hylabrook1 Forum Moderator
Joined: July 09 2006
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 3:56pm | IP Logged
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Praying for your mother, Carole.
Peace,
Nancy
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JennGM Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 3:57pm | IP Logged
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Oh Carole, I'm so sorry! and I'm sure you feel so helpless being so far. Praying for her and for you, and the eternal rest for your father.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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guitarnan Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Maryland
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 4:00pm | IP Logged
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I am praying for her, and for you. Widowhood is so very, very lonely. It has helped my MIL to speak with other widows (not her longtime friends, but other people she's met) and share experiences and emotions.
__________________ Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Chris V Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 03 2009 Location: Washington
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 4:11pm | IP Logged
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Oh Carole, I am so sad for her. I will be praying for her.
__________________ Chris
Happy Wife with my Happy Life
Mama to My Five Girls ('04~'07~'09~'11~'11)
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Maddie Forum All-Star
Joined: Dec 27 2005 Location: N/A
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 4:29pm | IP Logged
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I am so sorry! Praying for her!
__________________ ~Maddie~
Wife to my dh and Momma of 9 dear ones
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DominaCaeli Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2007
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 5:34pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Carole. Praying for your mother.
__________________ Blessings,
Celeste
Joyous Lessons
Mommy to six: three boys (8, 4, newborn) and four girls (7, 5, 2, and 1)
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ladybugs Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: California
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 5:38pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Carole, I will remember your dear mother in my prayers!
__________________ Love and God Bless,
Maria P
My etsy store - all proceeds go to help my fencing daughters!
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MaryM Board Moderator
Joined: Feb 11 2005 Location: Colorado
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 6:03pm | IP Logged
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Praying for her today and you as well - it must be so hard to hear her like that.
__________________ Mary M. in Denver
Our Domestic Church
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stefoodie Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 17 2005 Location: Ohio
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 6:11pm | IP Logged
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Praying for her, and you, Carole!!! My heart goes out to her. My grandfather was inconsolable after my grandmother passed away. It's difficult to see them like this, and I imagine especially harder for you because of the distance.
__________________ stef
mom to five
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Kathryn Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2009 Location: N/A
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Posted: April 08 2010 at 6:43pm | IP Logged
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Carole,
I've already prayed for your mother and will continue to do so. My step-father just passed away 4 weeks ago and I completely understand your feeling of wanting to help and hating to see her so sad and without a will to live. I also can understand your mom's feelings. I pray she finds peace and comfort in each new tomorrow even without the one she loves beside her. It is a very lonely road.
__________________ Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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Chari Forum Moderator
Joined: Jan 28 2005 Location: California
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Posted: April 09 2010 at 1:16am | IP Logged
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Holding your mom in prayer, Carole.
__________________ Chari...Take Up & Read
Dh Marty 27yrs...3 lovely maidens: Anne 24, Sarah 20 & Maddelyn 17 and 3 chivalrous sons: Matthew 22, Garrett 16 & Malachy 11
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aussieannie Forum All-Star
Joined: May 21 2006 Location: Australia
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Posted: April 09 2010 at 2:40am | IP Logged
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I've seen how hard such a loss has affected my own mother, so feeling for your situation there Carole, praying!!!
__________________ Under Her Starry Mantle
Spiritual Motherhood for Priests
Blessed with 3 boys & 3 girls!
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wamegomom Forum Pro
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Kansas
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Posted: April 09 2010 at 9:21pm | IP Logged
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Carole, it has to be so hard for you to be so far away when you hear your mother's pain. May our Blessed Mother comfort her in her loneliness.
Praying,
Mary Alice in Kansas
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cathhomeschool Board Moderator
Texas Bluebonnets
Joined: Jan 26 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: April 09 2010 at 10:34pm | IP Logged
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I am so sorry, Carole! How painful for your mom and hard for you to watch from a distance. The helplessness is so hard! When I feel that way, I rush outside, look into the sky and say aloud, "Be still and know I AM GOD." It brings me some peace. Praying for you and your mom.
__________________ Janette (4 boys - 22, 21, 15, 14)
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Carole N. Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 28 2006 Location: Wales
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Posted: April 15 2010 at 10:29am | IP Logged
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Update in op.
__________________ Carole ... in Wales
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Kathryn Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2009 Location: N/A
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Posted: April 15 2010 at 10:42am | IP Logged
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Carole,
Is your mom here in the States? Have you talked with your brother? I will continue to pray for her...do you mind sharing her name?
__________________ Kathryn in TX
(dd 16, ds 15, dd 8, dd 5)
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hylabrook1 Forum Moderator
Joined: July 09 2006
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Posted: April 15 2010 at 11:29am | IP Logged
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Carole - This is very hard. Continuing to pray.
Peace,
Nancy
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guitarnan Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Maryland
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Posted: April 15 2010 at 12:13pm | IP Logged
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Oh, dear. I will definitely pray with renewed fervor. I'll also offer my day up for her today. (There's already been much stress here, and I'm thankful to have an important intention to offer this day for.)
Sending cyberhugs to you across the waters...
__________________ Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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JennGM Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: April 15 2010 at 12:22pm | IP Logged
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Praying, Carole.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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