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Lorri Forum Pro
Joined: Dec 21 2006 Location: N/A
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 8:19am | IP Logged
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Saturday, someone in my extended family tried to kill his wife. They had a heated argument and culminated with him trying to stab her. His son arrived in time to stop him and the son ended up beating up the dad. Another daughter arrived during this and had to pull her brother off the dad.
Even though this is an "extended" family member, they are close to me. I can't be more specific.
The wife has moved out and will not return. The 4 adult children worry that the husband will not accept this and kill himself or even go after the wife again and kill her and himself.
No one has posted bail for the husband and he has a court date on Tuesday.
Please, please,please pray for this situation. I don't know how it can end even remotely well. Nothing is ever going to be the same for any of us and it's so surreal and ugly. It's so hard because we all love them both. I'm so afraid I'll never see either one of them again.
The wife's patron saint is Mary and we're all Mexican - maybe prayers to Our Lady of Guadalupe would be good. I'm sure there's a saint for domestic violence. Oh wait, I looked it up - St Rita's the one.
**12/2 update:
My relative, T, is still in jail. He was arraigned on Tuesday and was charged with assault with a kitchen knife with intent to do bodily harm. The public defender had hoped to get him out on his own recongnizance because he is 79 yo and in poor health and has no prior record. However, bail was set at 30,000. Multiple family members have offered to bail him out, but we all know he's a flight risk. The terms of the bail are that he is to have no contact with his wife, M. We know he'll try to see her, at least to mend fences and there goes the bail.
My parents offered to take T to their home, 2 hours away so he won't jump bail, but he didn't want to go. We're pretty sure that he thought he'd be walking out of the jail on Tuesday, so he turned down my mom's offer. My mom did not get a chance to talk to him at all during the court procedures and they whisked him out of there and back to jail. He was transferred at 2 am the next day, I'm not sure where.
The public defender pleaded not guilty because she wants to get the full story of what happened to make this old man snap. They are going to get a psych evaluation.
His wife, M, is back at home and is willing to take him back, provided he does everything she wants him to, including counseling and medication, if necessary.
The son that had to beat up is dad to save his mom is really struggling. Really struggling. I hope that he doesn't go off the deep end, too.
The pre-trial date is January 4th and the trial starts the 17th or 18th. We are praying that he pleads out instead of this actually going to trial. It'll get very ugly and things will be said that can never be taken back. With a plea, hopefully things can heal and be reconciled. Frankly, T doesn't have many years left. His wife is worried that after all this he'll just stop taking his meds and let himself die. We have a trip planned in March to be out that way, in small part because T said he wanted to see my dd again...
If you could keep us on your prayer list, I'd great appreciate it. Specifically that T accepts my mom's offer of going home with her. It's the best place for him. That M continues to be forgiving. She can be very vindictive if she wants. Pray for the son, the daughter who was the primary witness and the other two daughters who are also torn up by this.
__________________ Lorri
mom to
The Mac and Cheese Chronicles
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insegnante Forum All-Star
Joined: April 07 2006 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 8:21am | IP Logged
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Praying, Lorri.
__________________ Theresa
mommy to three boys, 3/02, 8/04, and 9/10, and a girl, 8/08
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momwats8 Forum All-Star
Joined: July 20 2006 Location: Florida
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 8:41am | IP Logged
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Oh Lorrie - I am storming heaven
__________________ Mary- Wife to Mike and Mother to Austin(92), Mikey(95), R.J.(97), Benedict(98), Kolbe(00), Ignatius(02), Christian(03), Margaret(05),&4 angels in heaven
http://www.momwats8.blogspot.com
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guitarnan Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Maryland
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 8:41am | IP Logged
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Oh, Lorri, I'm sorry. I will pray for all of you.
__________________ Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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JenniferS Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 09 2006
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 8:43am | IP Logged
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Praying.
Jen
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kingvozzo Forum All-Star
Joined: March 28 2005 Location: Maine
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 9:06am | IP Logged
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Lorri, I'm praying for all involved.
__________________ Noreen
Wife to Ed
Mom to 4 great kids and 10 sweet ones in Our Lady's arms
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Mackfam Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: Alabama
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 9:19am | IP Logged
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Oh my goodness Lorri, praying to St. Rita and Our Lady of Guadalupe for your intentions right now!
__________________ Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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MaryMary Forum All-Star
Joined: July 04 2006 Location: Canada
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 10:00am | IP Logged
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Oh, Lorri!
Honey, I am praying for you and your family members! This is so so hard, especially at this time of year!
__________________ Mary
Wife 2 1
Mum 2 four blessings on earth and two in heaven!
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trish Forum All-Star
Joined: April 11 2007 Location: Canada
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 10:10am | IP Logged
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Praying Lorri!
__________________ ~ Trish ~
Wife to Les
Mom to 8 Wonderful Kids
+AMDG+
Saintly Soaps
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Maryan Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 02 2007
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 10:12am | IP Logged
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So awful... prayers Lorri.
__________________ Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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MarieC Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 19 2005 Location: Ohio
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 11:14am | IP Logged
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So sorry to hear of this. I'll be praying.
__________________ Marie
mom to 6
dds-98, 00, 02 and 09 & dss-03 and 06
Out in the Orchard
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CKwasniewski Forum All-Star
Joined: March 31 2007
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 11:25am | IP Logged
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I will certainly pray!
CK
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Lara Sauer Forum All-Star
Joined: June 15 2007 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 11:33am | IP Logged
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Your family and especially you will be in our prayers. I will pray that a spirit of calm descend on all of of you and that all of you may be surrounded by a hedge of angels, that you might find peace.
Sincerely,
Sara Beatty
__________________ You can take the girl out of Wisconsin, but you can't take the Wisconsin out of the girl!
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Red Cardigan Forum Pro
Joined: June 16 2007 Location: N/A
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 12:11pm | IP Logged
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Praying for you.
__________________ http://www.redcardigan.blogspot.com
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Taffy Forum All-Star
Joined: April 05 2005 Location: Canada
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 1:09pm | IP Logged
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Praying for you...
__________________ Susan
Mom to 5 on earth and 1 in heaven
Susan's Soliloquy
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SusanJ Forum All-Star
Joined: May 25 2007 Location: New Jersey
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 1:22pm | IP Logged
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I have a special devotion to both St. Rita and Our Lady of Guadalupe. I will beg their intercession for your family. If it is any consolation, we had a domestic violence situation in our "extended" family that did end very well. The family is wonderful, now . . .
__________________ Mom to Joseph-8, Margaret-6, William-4, Gregory-2, and new little one due 11/1
Life Together
[URL=http://thejohnstonkids.blogspot.com]The Kids' Blog[/UR
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aussieannie Forum All-Star
Joined: May 21 2006 Location: Australia
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 1:54pm | IP Logged
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Praying Lorri, maybe a novena to Our Lady, Undoer of Knots would also be good - this sounds like a big, untieable knot - but Our Blessed Mother can interceed powerfully!
(I think the novena is posted in the Hidden Treasure somewhere.)
....Here it is.
__________________ Under Her Starry Mantle
Spiritual Motherhood for Priests
Blessed with 3 boys & 3 girls!
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MaryM Board Moderator
Joined: Feb 11 2005 Location: Colorado
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 2:59pm | IP Logged
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Praying, Lorri.
__________________ Mary M. in Denver
Our Domestic Church
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hylabrook1 Forum Moderator
Joined: July 09 2006
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 3:05pm | IP Logged
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How terrible and terrifying, Lorri. Praying for everyone involved.
Peace,
Nancy
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missionfamily Forum All-Star
Joined: April 10 2007 Location: Louisiana
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Posted: Dec 17 2007 at 10:58pm | IP Logged
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Oh Lorri, how terrible. Many prayers from here...if you can get your hands on the St. Rita movie (the company is always advertised in Faith and Family, can't remember the name) it would bolster you in hope and devotion I'm sure.
__________________ Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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