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MarilynW Forum All-Star
Joined: June 28 2006 Location: N/A
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 9:01am | IP Logged
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Selecting Godparents is a tough issue in our family. For our first children - we did the "politically correct" thing to keep the peace - selecting people who maybe we should not have. But the whole role of godparent is one we take so seriously - and it is hard as we have family members who really get their feathers ruffled if we do not choose them - even though they are not practicing Catholics, faithful to the Magisterium or even that interested in the children. For our last baby we selected non-family - and it upset a few people.
How do you deal with the issue and keep the peace?
__________________ Marilyn
Blessed with 6 gifts from God
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5athome Forum Pro
Joined: Oct 01 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 9:32am | IP Logged
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For our 6, we chose either 1 faithfully practicing family member or the 1 family member + 1 friend. We a in the same boat in that the family we have not selected is irked although they are not practicing. I think they just do not realize the significance of the choice. In our parish a letter from their parish and baptismal class attendance is required so that has helped sooth feelings. That said if we are blessed with more we will ask friends and/or ask our eldest as he is close to being confirmed.
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Ruth Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 04 2006 Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline Posts: 5007
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 9:35am | IP Logged
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For our first child we also did the "politically correct" thing, and I will always regret it. For the rest of the children, we have the same God-mother, but different God-fathers. Sadly, no one in both our immediate family is a practicing Catholic. They know how we feel about our faith, so they don't question our decisions about it. Now when it comes to the size of our family, or homeschooling, well, that's another story.
Good luck, and you'll be in our prayers. God bless.
__________________ Ruth
mom to 7 miracles
My family blog
Loreto Rosaries
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mathmama Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 07 2006 Location: Pennsylvania
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 10:11am | IP Logged
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We have not chosen family members to be godparents for either of our children (2yo dd, and one on the way). It is a very serious decision for us and we are blessed to have some beautiful Catholics as friends (Mary Ann, momtomany, being one of them ) that we have asked. Our families both think we are off the deep end and there is very little that we do anymore that surprises them. Dh comes from a large family and all of his siblings are either not practicing or have been ruled out be dh for other reasons. I only have 1 ds and I was a little nervous to tell her who the godparents were for our dd as I am the godmother of her first born. Thankfully, she said that she didn't feel that she was up to being a godmother to one of our children. She is a sometimes practicing Catholic who does not take her faith seriously in the slightest.
I guess I don't really have any advice as we have not encountered any difficulties. I pray that it all works out for you.
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Lisbet Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2006 Location: Michigan
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 2:44pm | IP Logged
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We too have selected godparents in the past that we regret. Now that our children are getting older that we chose those godparents for, we encourage them to pray for conversion of their godparents. For the others, we chose good friends, faithful Catholics who take their job seriously.
__________________ Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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Michaela Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 25 2005 Location: Washington
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 3:06pm | IP Logged
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Lisbet wrote:
we encourage them to pray for conversion of their godparents. |
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My oldest's Godfather has left the Catholic church and was rebaptized into another denomination. His Godmother just doesn't attend church anymore.
This is WONDERFUL advice. I'm thankful you took the time to post it.
__________________ Michaela
Momma to Nicholas 16, Nathan 13, Olivia 13, Teresa 6, & Anthony 3
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humanaevitae Forum Pro
Joined: May 31 2005 Location: Minnesota
Online Status: Offline Posts: 411
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 5:43pm | IP Logged
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Sometime ago I printed off a wonderful article (no, I don't remember where) detailing the responsibilities of Godparents and what the Church expects from them. We give that to prospective Godparents and ask them to read and pray about it before they say yes. As a result we have had one family member turn the responsibility down.
We have so far been able to chose one family and one friend for each child. It will get sticky from here on out. I do think it helps when family realizes that it is a responsibility and not just an honorary post for favorite Aunt!
__________________ Nicole-Zane 10, Elizabeth 7, Xavier 4, and John Patrick 2
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rm4mrfrus Forum Pro
Joined: March 27 2006
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Posted: Dec 26 2006 at 8:41pm | IP Logged
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We chose family friends starting with our firstborn and so now our family does not expect us to choose anybody within the family....but we have also chosen Godparents who did not turn out to be the kind of Godparents we hoped for...this has only happened with our 9 yodd. Her Godparents moved away and divorced. She was really aching for involved Godparents for the last year or so (seeing how her siblings Godparents are so involved and such) so after making sure it was "ok" we asked our youngest dd's godparents to take the place of older dd's absent Godparents. They both said they would be delighted to do so and it has been a great thing for our dd. It is nothing offficial in the books but it is important to all of us nonetheless. Praying for the conversion of the Godparents is a great suggestion which I will talk to my dd about.
__________________ Hollee married to dh in 94,
ds(96), dd(97), ds(00), ds(02), ds(03) and dd(05)
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