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doris Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: United Kingdom
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 3:29pm | IP Logged
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Hello all
My dh has recently attended a conference on Catholic medical ethics which was held in a local Opus Dei house. Predictably he was targetted by the Opus Dei guys keen to recruit him. (I say predictably because he's been courted before.)
He's reasonably keen -- he likes their orthodoxy, and even the one-day conference gave him a sense of community and support which is sadly lacking in his daily life.
I haven't read That Book (and know it's complete trash), but I am a little put off by the alleged secrecy, and also the tendency among members I've known to act as though non-members aren't really proper Catholics. The gender segregation seems slightly odd to me, too.
The other thing is that we had a brush with Communion and Liberation several years ago, and that was scarily cult-ish (at least where we were). So that makes me a little wary of this sort of group.
Does anyone here have any advice or experience that they would be willing to share?
Elizabeth
__________________ Home educating in London, UK with dd (2000) ds (2002), dd (2004), ds (2008) and dd (2011).
Frabjous Days
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Lisbet Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2006 Location: Michigan
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 3:44pm | IP Logged
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I don't have personal experience with Opus Dei, but I am part of Regnum Christi, a lay movement in the Church that also is plauged with false allegations and cult-ish accusations. The concerns that you voice are similiar to the concerns many have about RC. The tendency for memembers to act as you say is blatent spiritual pride and, at least for RC, not methodology of the movement. I can't speak of gender segregation and Opus Dei, but I do know and understand why it is oftentimes done in RC.
I will dig up some links for you about JPII's support for both RC and Opus Dei, (and plethora of other lay movements) and support from our current Pope. I'll try to get to them in the morning, gotta get dinner around now.
__________________ Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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JennGM Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 4:59pm | IP Logged
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Elizabeth,
My husband and I are Cooperators of Opus Dei, which means we pray daily for the Work and help financially. I'm not the greatest at explaining, but I'll attempt a little. I'm very skeptical, and have studied all the "angles".
Opus Dei means "Work of God" and St. Josemaria was inspired by the idea of Universal Call to Holiness. Not only priests and nuns can become saints, but everyone, from the single, wife, husband in whatever avocation -- doctor, trashman, dry cleaner, tailor, teacher... But because we are busy and in the world, there isn't that much time for quiet contemplation. We sanctify our daily work...our work becomes the prayer. It's not a new idea, of course.
I agree with Lisbet that there are many rumors and untruths about these lay orders. And also remember that all the members are human, and we are all flawed. The organization might be very good, but sometimes you might get a bad apple -- don't let it spoil the whole barrel.
Opus Dei members "court" people that seem good matches for their spiritual organization. That's the main purpose for these groups -- providing spiritual direction and a plan of life for those living in the world. The ideas are similar to Third Order Dominican, Franciscan, and Carmelite, just each has their own special mark.
The best way for you to find out the truth about Opus Dei is for your husband to see for himself. We have found no hiding or secrecy. It's a vocation, and it takes time and studying to discern whether or not he's truly called to be a member or a Cooperator. Just because they ask for him to "come and see" doesn't mean that you're signed up and in a secret society. Both sides need to discern if it's a good fit, and it takes a while to become a member. It's not an overnight, sign the paper and you're stuck forever.
And you're not stuck forever. I have a few friends who were married members who have left. No hard feelings, it just wasn't working for them.
The Seven Daily Habits of Holy Apostolic People by Father McCloskey will give you an idea of a spiritual plan of life.
Ordinary Work, Extraordinary Grace: My Spiritual Journey in Opus Dei by Scott Hahn
We love the spirituality, and the writings of St. Josemaria Escriva, but it was too much time commitment from the family, so we decided against it.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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ladybugs Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: California
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 5:01pm | IP Logged
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I am a cooperator with Opus Dei and I haven't found anything questionable about their practices. The gender separation is for spiritual formation specific to one's state in life - meaning, if I were a young professional, I'd attend that formation. Since I am a married woman, I attend that formation. Their orthodoxy is solid and going to confession with an Opus Dei priest is a wonderful and glorious experience.
In regards to the allegations, remember that whenever there is good, there will be allegations of badness precisely to cause doubt and dissention and a lack of credibility.
My dh is also a cooperator with Opus Dei. He credits Opus Dei with saving his life back when he was a teenager as he was brought up receiving the Sacraments but not attending Mass.
I don't know if that helps but I just mention that as my experience.
__________________ Love and God Bless,
Maria P
My etsy store - all proceeds go to help my fencing daughters!
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doris Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: United Kingdom
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 5:11pm | IP Logged
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Thanks for this. Just one other niggle while I'm at it -- Opus Dei people seem only to be interested in the well-to-do and successful. Jesus wasn't like that!
Elizabeth
__________________ Home educating in London, UK with dd (2000) ds (2002), dd (2004), ds (2008) and dd (2011).
Frabjous Days
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JennGM Forum Moderator
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 5:21pm | IP Logged
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doris wrote:
Thanks for this. Just one other niggle while I'm at it -- Opus Dei people seem only to be interested in the well-to-do and successful. Jesus wasn't like that! |
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It might seem that way...but I can assure you that almost all the ladies in my Circle (including me) aren't well-to-do! And most of those I know aren't.
I do think there is a gravitation to those who have their "act together" or intelligent, how I define "successful". I see it mostly as someone who is "successful" will have the intelligence to understand and discern clearly whether or not Opus Dei is the spirituality for them....there is no forcing, but an intelligent decision.
__________________ Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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Rachel May Forum All-Star
Joined: June 24 2005 Location: Kansas
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 7:31pm | IP Logged
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I'm reading a great book now called Opus Dei by John Allen, Jr.
It answers the questions you've asked in a thorough and readable way. I had few preconceived notions of Opus Dei other that what I read in "that book." This book briefly addresses what Allen refers to as that "mythologized version of Opus Dei."
One strength of the book is that it interviews people who have left Opus Dei with bad feelings, explores their objections, presents the objections to St. Josemaria's sainthood, and looks at Opus Dei from the perspective of money, women, mortification, how the popes see/have seen it, and how much power it has in the Vatican or in the Church throughout the world. In short, it gives a warts and all view which makes the subtitle "an Objective Look Behind the Myths and Reality of the Most Controversial Force in the Catholic Church" a bit less laughable.
__________________ Rachel
Thomas and Anthony (10), Maria (8), Charles (6), Cecilia (5), James (3), and Joseph (1)
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Helen Forum All-Star
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 9:53pm | IP Logged
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Many family members of mine are involved with Opus Dei. The parents of one family in particular - all of their seven grown children attend Mass and have children right away when they get married.
Pretty respectable in today's world.
__________________ Ave Maria!
Mom to 5 girls and 3 boys
Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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ladybugs Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: California
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 9:59pm | IP Logged
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doris wrote:
Thanks for this. Just one other niggle while I'm at it -- Opus Dei people seem only to be interested in the well-to-do and successful. Jesus wasn't like that!
Elizabeth |
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I have had the same thoughts but when you get down to it and get to really know the women, many are struggling. I know I fall into the trap of thinking that if they don't look like they're struggling they're not. Don't let that be you. More often than not, these women are dealing with different crosses...two women that I know have autistic children - one has 3 autistic children and her dh is in the military and frequently gone....
And if this helps, we live meal to meal. We are still recovering from years of lay-offs in the finance and lending industry, the computer industry and now an industry change into trucking - yep, my Opus Dei dh is a trucker...so try not to get distracted by externals - that's all they are.
The fruit is what matters.
__________________ Love and God Bless,
Maria P
My etsy store - all proceeds go to help my fencing daughters!
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KellyJ Forum All-Star
Joined: June 29 2006 Location: N/A
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 7:27am | IP Logged
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I'm not involved with Opus Dei or Regnum Christi, but I have heard from various people over time that both organizations are only interested in the wealthy. However, one or more people (neither in either group) explained to me that the reason both groups seek out the wealthy is so that the message and work may spread to many. If I remember correctly, RC has one or more programs that are specifically targeted at helping the poor. OD may as well.
Many wealthy people are well-connected. They can get things moving, spread the word, and increase involvement in ways most others cannot. Frequently, they are also able to contribute at higher levels and greater frequency that others. This also helps in the apostolate by helping provide for the work and needs of the organizations as well as that of the priests and consecrated persons working in the apostolate.
__________________ KellyJ
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kjohnson Forum All-Star
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 7:58am | IP Logged
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My husband and I graduated from the University of Dallas and both Opus Dei and Regnum Christi have a presence on the campus. Opus Dei because the men's center is located in Las Colinas near the campus and Regnum Christi because their Highlands School is located on the campus.
It has been my experience that it's not so much a target of the wealthy, but a concentration at intellectual institutions. Both groups are known for their schools and I believe they heavily recruit college students because students are generally at a point in their lives where they are still trying to discern a vocation.
I know many people in Regnum Christi and Opus Dei and I can't pigeon hole them into one category. They're all different. I do know that the men involved in Opus Dei in my area have an incredible outreach to the underpriviledged children of the Dallas-area. I know one Numerary in particular who has quit his high-paying mortgage broker job to dedicate his time fully to this apostolate to poor children.
I don't feel called to participate in Opus Dei, but I am a huge fan of St. Josemaria Escriva. If you take some time to read his books you'll find that his teachings are simply the decrees of the Second Vatican Council lived out in life: the universal call to holiness of the laity, lived out in ordinary life. St. Josemaria's small books, the Navarre Bible commentaries and In Conversation with God are probably the best ways to get to know the true spirituality of Opus Dei. You can find them all at Scepter Publishers.
__________________ In Christ,
Katherine
Wife to Doug and Mother of 6
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Lisbet Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 07 2006 Location: Michigan
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 8:23am | IP Logged
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My husband and I are both Regnum Christi, and trust me, we are NOT wealthy! BUT, I could understand why some would think that RC targets those that are financially well off, many of the people in our area that are part of RC are indeed wealthy, it's because the methodology of the movement is along the lines of leaders reaching many souls. (think corporate/business world, politics, etc...) I struggled with this issue just before my incorporation, and truthfully, I still do from time to time. But, oftentimes it's my own weakness, because I struggle with our financial burdens.
I have seen the fruits of RC in my family in a big way. It's a spirituality that suits our lifestyle and personalities very well. It's helped equipt me to better understand raising my children, esp. my boys. Conquest Club has been an absolute Godsend for me, as has the 4 years of FAMILIA my husband and I have been through. TORCH while not quite officially an apostolate of RC has been very enriching for us. My husband and I current facilitate a Splendor of Love group, and it's been wonderful. (Catholic World Mission is also and RC apostolate.)
I remember when I was first begining my instructions in the faith, I was met with the same kind of allegations and accusations about the Catholic Church.
__________________ Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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lapazfarm Forum All-Star
Joined: July 21 2005 Location: Alaska
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 10:38am | IP Logged
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My husband's entire extended family is very involved with Opus Dei. They are not wealthy at all, let me assure you. What they are: some of the most devout, kind, generous, loving people you would ever want to meet.
And St. Josemaria's writings are just wonderful. They truly speak to the ordinary person's call to sainthood.
If there were any Opus Dei around here, I think we would be very interested in becoming more involved. Sadly we live in a Catholic "desert", here.
__________________ Theresa
us-schooling in beautiful Fairbanks, Alaska.
LaPaz Home Learning
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Angela F Forum All-Star
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 11:29am | IP Logged
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Hi Elizabeth and all,
I also am a cooperator for Opus Dei and well-to-do in terms of the world, I (we) are NOT! I think you've gotten some awesome replies. Opus Dei is not for everyone and as Jenn said, both sides need to discern. As Catholics, we are all to be growing in holiness, and Opus Dei, helps me do that. I have a plan of life I follow and through Opus Dei found a wonderful spiritual director.
I highly recommend the In Conversation with God series (one priest called it your homily for the day. ) And last summer I read At God's Pace a very readable account of St. Josemaria's life and his work. I really enjoyed it.
And just a personal note, it's easy for me to look at all the good qualites of the other cooperators and our leader (called a supernumerary because of her training) and then get "down" about myself and where I'm at on my journey, but I just remind myself that we are ALL sinners, and all need to grow in holiness! That helps me, anyway.
Keep asking questions - we'll answer if we can!
God bless you all; blessed Advent.
Angela
__________________ Mom to 7 blessings - welcome to Hanna Clare 1/19/10
"‘Great’ holiness consists in carrying out the ‘little’ duties of each moment."
St. Josemaria Escriva
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Marybeth Forum All-Star
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 9:56pm | IP Logged
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I went on an Opus Dei retreat back in April which was a godsend to me during Lent. We had a wonderful and holy priest who led the retreat. I am not planning on "joining" Opus Dei or the RC which are big in the Chicago suburbs. I think my spirituality is much like my homeschooling...I take what works for my family and don't follow one path fully. I enjoyed my Advent evening of recollection with the RC woman I know last Monday. It doesn't mean I am joining RC or anything of that nature.
I think Opus Dei and RC are very popular (for lack of a better word) because young families who are striving to live out our faith need support and nuturing. We haven't found good support in many churches in the past few decades. These movements allow for spiritual grow, practical advice on living our vocation and friendship.
It is good you are seeking advice and your husband is willing to grow deeper in his faith. Do you think you will have a chance soon to participate in something Opus Dei has for woman in your area? It may help you.
Mb
__________________ Marybeth (Mb)
http://held-together.blogspot.com
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Becky Parker Forum All-Star
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Posted: Dec 09 2006 at 6:43am | IP Logged
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Just wanted to add another to the list of those who are in Regnum Christi but not wealthy! I agree with those above - it is the fruit that matters. Regnum Christi has been a wonderful influence on our family. In a diocese that has been quite liberal for years (although it is making a turnaround) RC has been like a "beacon in the darkness".
Blessings!
__________________ Becky
Wife to Wes, Mom to 6 wonderful kids on Earth and 4 in Heaven!
Academy Of The Good Shepherd
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theresa-lynn Forum Rookie
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Posted: Dec 09 2006 at 8:00pm | IP Logged
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We are RC too, and not wealthy by any means
As a convert, I have LOVED the formation that I recieve through Regnum Christi, as well as all of the wonderful faithful catholics that I otherwise probably wouldn't have met.
We are in Familia too and it changed our marriage and our life!!
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SuzanneG Forum Moderator
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Posted: Dec 09 2006 at 10:59pm | IP Logged
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We used to have an Opus Dei priest come up from CA every month for "Evenings of Recollection".
Tues for the women.
Wednesdays for the men.
They were open to anyone, as I am not a member of Opus Dei. They were wonderful, and we are so disappointed that this is not happening anymore. As Maria said, going to confession with an Opus Dei priest is a wonderful experience.
__________________ Suzanne in ID
Wife to Pete
Mom of 7 (Girls - 14, 12, 11, 9, 7 and Boys - 4, 1)
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doris Forum All-Star
Joined: April 24 2006 Location: United Kingdom
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Posted: Dec 12 2006 at 7:18pm | IP Logged
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Thanks everyone for your input. We are still discerning. I've recently read something from an Australian archbishop where he really recommends one of the 'new movements' as a way of lay people getting support and fellowship -- the question is, which one!
Elizabeth
__________________ Home educating in London, UK with dd (2000) ds (2002), dd (2004), ds (2008) and dd (2011).
Frabjous Days
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Donna Marie Forum All-Star
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Posted: Dec 12 2006 at 7:41pm | IP Logged
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I have had a bit of experience with Regnum Christi too...and maybe it was the company that I was keeping at the time but there was always a push for me to give and I just couldn't. I was pregnant with #6 at the time and they wanted me to do some kind of apostolate work...like one thing that was 45 minutes away from my home one day a week...couldn't do that either...both from a family standpoint (they needed me home) and financially (again) so we parted ways. I was also to have RC trained spiritual guidance...which was from a female...who made me feel very uncomfortable as I felt it was very invasive. I would rather have spiritual guidance from my priest.
Anyhoo...My primary obligation is these children. Maybe someday I will be involved in something else.
__________________ God love you!
Donna Marie from NJ
hs momma to 9dc!!
Finding Elegant Simplicity
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