Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Sarah
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 9:53am | IP Logged Quote Sarah

I'm really starting to panic. I read your blogs and view your children's work.

I hear all that others are doing in their schools and I'm really worried about what is happening here.

I have been so sick since the end of Oct. with this pregnancy. Nothing is happening as far as school goes. Nothing. I am barely caring for the children's basic needs that just reading a book feels monumental. My boys aren't independent workers.

I'm not even going to attempt school until January. December has been dedicated to rehabiliating my strength, cleaning up attitudes and the house, and getting a grip again.

Have you ever taken off a lot of time from school? Tell me that it all worked out.

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ladybugs
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 9:58am | IP Logged Quote ladybugs

Sarah wrote:
I'm really starting to panic. I read your blogs and view your children's work.

I hear all that others are doing in their schools and I'm really worried about what is happening here.

I have been so sick since the end of Oct. with this pregnancy. Nothing is happening as far as school goes. Nothing. I am barely caring for the children's basic needs that just reading a book feels monumental. My boys aren't independent workers.

I'm not even going to attempt school until January. December has been dedicated to rehabiliating my strength, cleaning up attitudes and the house, and getting a grip again.

Have you ever taken off a lot of time from school? Tell me that it all worked out.


Sarah, first of all, I just want to say that despite not doing school, your children are learning. It doesn't look like learning in the traditional sense but they are learning.

In order to make you feel better about the learning, though, is there a trusted friend or neighbor who could work with your dc? Maybe an outing to the library? Maybe reading to them?

Do any of your children like to bake? cook?

I'm just trying to throw out ideas and help.

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ladybugs
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 10:00am | IP Logged Quote ladybugs

You know, I just looked at your blog. What if you gave each of your children - depending on your comfort level - time with your digital camera? They could photograph something and tell the story of what they photograph, why...etc....they may even print it out and create a notebook on it....

Ok, gotta run. Today will be busy.

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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 10:20am | IP Logged Quote lapazfarm

We take alot of time off and I don't even have your excuse! Guess what. We are fine! Please just try to focus on feeling better, your children will be fine!
You may want to try some educational websites for your older dc. There's tons of good stuff out there!

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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 10:35am | IP Logged Quote hylabrook1

Sarah -

Please don't borrow trouble; you have an important task to attend to right now, and that is where you need to be. God knows that!

Could the children play games, educational or semi-educational? We have inexpensive flash cards that are sold at Wal-Mart for things like "Addition War" -- the regular card game of War, but you need to add to know which card beats the other.   Read alouds, of course, when you can deal with that. Our library has all sorts of educational videos, from Eyewitness nature topics to stuff about composers, just everything you could ever think of and then some. Also, foreign language learning programs. They could listen to books on tape or CD while coloring pictures that relate to seasonal topics (you might find some on line, search coloring pages). I know you don't feel well enough to make a library run, but maybe dh can get there on a Saturday (I know he works crazy hours, but maybe?) or else a friend or neighbor could go to the library for you.

Above all, please try not to worry about it. We are almost at Christmas, when NOBODY will be doing school. After that, just wait and see. You can "catch up" even in the summer by doing a couple of things each day.

After all, all of your children are still pretty young. None of them needs to complete a course to make it to college in the fall, right? I will pray for you to be at peace.

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Cay Gibson
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 10:41am | IP Logged Quote Cay Gibson

Sarah,
(((HUGS))) to you.

All my 9 yr old did this morning was watch the Animal Planet...a show on skunks . She found out that you can have a skunk for a pet and that we use the musk from skunks to make perfume and that skunks are as bad as racoons in a kitchen etc. etc. etc.

Now to talk her out of having a skunk for a pet.

What Maria said...they are learning all the time. Just sit back on the sofa and observe. Practice
masterly inactivity and observe what masterly inactivity the children take on.

I didn't learn this overnight either. It took me a couple of years to get comfortable with it as well as several different children and multiple personalities and learning abilities to see that this can really work.

I'll be praying for you...

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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 10:50am | IP Logged Quote Elizabeth

Sarah,
When I started blogging I literally wrote with my head on the computer desk. I remember doing a post on Lent presentations. It was all I did that day! I dragged myself into the dining room to set it up before the children were awake. I presented the lesson. And then I went back to the couch. If you look at the post, you see that I could only muster the energy to write the presentation questions. I probably had a child sit and upload the pix.Most of my blog through July represents ALL I did. If I did it, I blogged it. Which means we didn't do all that much, but what we did was of the highest quality I could muster. Just a few posts after the Lent post is a post all about workbooks!

Now, I'm no longer all-day-long, all-pregnancy-long sick. Now I have a newborn. This is a very high maintenance baby. On top of temperament, she got sick. No time to write. No time to craft. Just getting back on my feet postpartum. AND IT'S ADVENT. I'm back to barely doing one good thing a day. I called Molly practically in tears at the inadequacy I was feeling just reading through blogs. I didn't blog it though, because, frankly, it sounds really whiny.

Then, I read Tracy's post on Real Learning about my book. That sent me to my book and I read page 227. It was all about how Michael held Stephen while he was sick with RSV. And the picture on the facing page is actually Michael holding Katie when she had RSV (four years later--this book took a very long time to write ). As I was reading, Christian was holding Karoline in a mist-filled room so she could breathe.

Yesterday, Michael and I sat down to pull together a portfolio of all he's done and--especially--all he's read to include with college applications. I was blown away! One of his application essay questions asks him to tell about a person who had a big influence on his life. Who did he choose? His infant sister.

This is an extraordinary way to educate and your results will be extradordinary.

All this to say that we've had lots of seasons like the one you're describing and it really will turn out WELL!

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Sarah
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 3:57pm | IP Logged Quote Sarah

Thanks ladies. I really can't tell you how much your words meant to me. I have really felt alone here and very guilty.

My MIL has called the kids to see if they had school and my own mother (who never had a moment of nausea in her pg's) told me to keep school going no matter what! Neither are warm to this hs idea, so confiding worries in them in is out of the question.

I'm so grateful for you all and this forum. Especially at times like this when all feels rather dark.

Sometimes, as Elizabeth said above, its hard to post or admit troubles because it comes across whiny.

Thanks again. . .

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guitarnan
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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 4:33pm | IP Logged Quote guitarnan

Sarah,

You have had so many good suggestions that I really don't have anything to add...except some nice classical music when the children get tired of language tapes.

Reading aloud is great...lately it feels like that is all we've been doing. Tuesday we had the Tow Truck Experience of Doom (this translates to, I sat in my totally dead van for over 4 hours in an underground garage waiting for a tow...and that was the good part). All we did for school on Tuesday was read aloud. I read until I was hoarse. There's not much else to do in a dark, dead van!

(I love the board/card game idea...the games can really teach children a lot...like how to take turns, follow rules, count, identify colors and shapes...and that's just Candyland!)

I have been feeling pretty sorry for myself lately (Christmas is really overwhelming things and we have a dead van I can't fix...and I'll have to have another towing experience to take it somewhere to have repairs!) I plan to take a lot of the advice from everyone here to heart!

I'll keep you in my prayers...I remember starting the home learning journey and getting those phone calls! Your family will relax as they realize that your children aren't growing extra heads or becoming sociopaths.

Hugs,

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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 5:11pm | IP Logged Quote Sarah in SC

(((Sarah)))

I just wanted to suggest books on tape or CD (I haven't read thru all the responses, so I apologize if someone has already suggested this!).

When I have HG, just having to focus my eyes on a page to read aloud can be enough to trigger an episode of non-stop vomiting. Books on tape or CD have been lifesavers. You can lie there with your eyes closed and listen, and the children could color or do copywork while they're listening, too.

I'll try to think of any other strategies we have used to get thru the HG awfulness.

I'm so sorry you're feeling so incredibly rotten, still. Praying you turn a corner SOON!



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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 5:25pm | IP Logged Quote Elizabeth

Honestly, I couldn't read. I couldn't even listen that well. But we watched hours of the Food Network (I know, seems counterintuitive, but whatever...). As a result, my kids can cook. Really. And it's a very useful skill that I hadn't quite planned to teach that way. They all have FN stars who are favorites and they READ their cookbooks. It's rather comical. Now. It wasn't funny six months ago.

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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 6:28pm | IP Logged Quote J.Anne

Elizabeth, that is so funny. That is exactly what we did. I would sleep on the couch with my daughter beside me watching "Barefoot Contessa" and "30 Minute Meals". My daughter is also now a passionate baker. There would be days I wouldn't move off the couch. And it taught her a little empathy. My daughter, at age 3, would prepare little salads and treats for me. I felt so guilty at the time, though. I'm so sorry, Sarah. You aren't alone.

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Posted: Dec 07 2006 at 10:25pm | IP Logged Quote kjohnson

Sarah, I have been there and I've finally come to accept that schooling goes in seasons. I had a horrible first 4 months of this pregnancy. I've never been so sick and exhausted. We didn't do much. It is what it is. When my nausea subsided, we picked up the pace and are going strong. In March, or maybe even sooner depending on my health at the end of this pregnancy, we will slow way down if not come to a stop for a while.

I've also posted on another thread that last year I was so ill that I couldn't school at all. My dear children went to public school for the year after being homeschooled since the very beginning. Thank God they are home now, but I think God allowed it to happen to humble me. I learned that anything I can do with and for my children is a gift from God. And when I'm going strong I need to not be proud of myself, but thankful to God for the energy, health and grace. And when things slow down, I need to recall my frail humanity and remember that this dry spell is what God wants for me at this moment and there is something here for me to learn. Spring always follows the dead of winter. It's like fasting, and through it we come to see our weakness and God willing, learn to cling to God. It's in the desert that we grow the most spiritually.

And whatever you do, don't compare yourself to others. Nothing is ever exactly as it seems and everyone has their crosses. It may be that someone is bearing it silently and it is just not obvious to those on the outside looking in.

You are definitely not alone, so please don't feel guilty. God will provide and your children are blessed to be in your loving home.

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Sarah
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Posted: Dec 08 2006 at 9:16am | IP Logged Quote Sarah

kjohnson wrote:
I learned that anything I can do with and for my children is a gift from God. And when I'm going strong I need to not be proud of myself, but thankful to God for the energy, health and grace.


This is so true. I LONG to be able to work for my family. When the ability to physically work and serve is gone you really appreciate it and are so thankful for it. I don't take it for granted anymore. At the times when I'm functioning I TRY to be so grateful for the ability to work. I can't wait for that to return.

Its funny what the kids pursue when you are out of commission. The Food Network is so funny.

My two older boys play the piano constantly (I hear it now)and it has really improved their piano playing. They wouldn't have done it otherwise if they were always looking to me for something to do.

At many times, though, I have resorted to videos just to keep the little ones occupied and safe. I really don't like that. It makes me feel so bad when they're "plugged in." I control what they watch, but I sure wish something different for them. I guess as it was said above, it is a season. It won't be forever.

Every day I feel the nausea getting a little better, which is hopeful. Now I need rehabilitating my out-of-shape body. I've done this 7 times now and it seems harder each time.

Thanks for all your kind words and humor. It really helps.

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Leonie
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Posted: Dec 09 2006 at 12:07am | IP Logged Quote Leonie

Sarah wrote:

Have you ever taken off a lot of time from school? Tell me that it all worked out.


It works out.

With son number 5 I was on bed rest for the whole pregnancy and also in and out of hospital with complications. Dh was working long hours. All the kids did was chores , some simple cooking, I read aloud and we listened to music and watched videos. And they played. And played. And read themselves, if they were readers.

They did a journal entry here and there. A few workbook pages here and there. Nothing regular.

At the end of the year, I tested each school age son in Maths - and each passed the test! How? Simply by learning from real life.

That sold me, many years ago, on real learning.

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Angel
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Posted: Dec 09 2006 at 6:01pm | IP Logged Quote Angel

Well, it seems like we are okay, and since we began homeschooling, we have taken a lot of time off for the same reasons you are. My oldest has some learning difficulties, but it does seem that we are able to "catch up" in those times when I'm not in my first trimester or I don't have young infants.    I just try really hard to have a good routine during those periods of time when I'm able to.

When I was pregnant with my twins, I was SO sick from about 3 weeks until 25 weeks. We also packed up our house and moved 1000 miles. I read some books, but definitely not as many as I would have liked to. My oldest was 8 and having a hard time learning to read. My husband listened to him read at night, and mostly the kids played in the backyard. After I felt better, I had so many aches and pains I was out of commission for most of the day, so we mostly read books on the couch. Then we used workbooks for about a month, and after that the babies came a month early. We relied *heavily* on books on CD then!

But now both my 10 yo and my 7 yo read really, really well, and they both seem to be on grade level for math. So I am hesitantly beginning to relax a little. With 3 age 3 and under, though, I can't do all the wonderful things I read on everyone's blogs either. I am satisfying myself by printing out many of the posts, and telling myself that there will come a time when we, too, will be able to work in the crafts and read-alouds and rabbit trails... all in our own time.


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Sarah
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Posted: Dec 09 2006 at 6:05pm | IP Logged Quote Sarah

Thanks everyone. Really. I appreciate your words of encouragement so so much.



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