Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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LisaD
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 7:18pm | IP Logged Quote LisaD

DH has said that he doesn't want me to homeschool our kids. He is worried that they will be "weird" if they are homeschooled    I'm worried about far worse if they are not! However, he has agreed that public school is not in the best interest of our family, so we are enrolling our dd in 2nd grade and our oldest ds in Kindergarten at our parish school. The parish school is good, we know families there, all teachers are practicing Catholics. But...I am worried for dd, who is so bright, that she will be bored in the classroom, and for ds, who is very quiet and shy, that he will be overlooked. I am also worried about the vast sum of money required for tuition, uniforms, and the obligation to buy $3000 worth of scrip a year, for places we never shop at. (Although, with the price of gasoline, we could probably buy almost $3000 in gas scrip!)

Is it wrong to hope that this parochial school doesn't work, for whatever reason, so that we can bring our children home?

The other families we know in the school are really good people, and so excited about the school. I just feel uneasy

My DH is a good man, a good father, but a product of our culture, iykwim. He thinks children have to be educated in a school. I have presented him with all the evidence to the contrary, but I'm not moving him. I am praying that the Holy Spirit will, if our children are meant to learn at home.

I am just so disappointed and sad

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momwise
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 7:34pm | IP Logged Quote momwise

LisaD wrote:
My DH is a good man, a good father, but a product of our culture, iykwim. He thinks children have to be educated in a school.


Lisa I know your dh is a good father. Say the 30-day prayer to St. Joseph. It will produce many great graces for the whole family. Ask for a miracle!! The Little Sisters of the Poor always do.

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mom2mpr
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 7:39pm | IP Logged Quote mom2mpr

Lisa,
I am with you. My dh has never truly been on board but see's ds isn't falling behind so has given his blessing, so far. I know that day is coming(soon) when he will ask for him to go-and he wants him to try public school. He refuses to pay for what we already pay for in our taxes. I would love to have him in parachial school to continue what I am teaching at home as far as religion,morals,ethics,etc. You are so lucky dh is OK with a private school that sounds wonderful with nice families involved!
Anyhow, I comfort myself with:
-I have had X years with my kids with me, loving them, enjoying them and making MY impression on them-my values and morals. THat counts for something.
-God has a plan for them and "they are not my own." I pray for them now and will pray twice as hard when they are "out there."
-We have homeschooled and know it is an option for anytime we are not happy with the schools we are using. What a nice safety net to fall back into
May our God comfort you and give you peace with this trial--it IS so hard to let those babies go. Mine haven't left yet and I already occasionally get very sad thinking about them not being home with me
Hope some of this helps and makes sense.
All the best,
Anne
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kingvozzo
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 9:08pm | IP Logged Quote kingvozzo

Lisa, I'm sorry that you're facing this disappointment. It sounds like your parish school is very promising, and I'm sure that you'll still be doing all sorts of wonderful activities with your dd so she doesn't get bored. I'm sure that your attention will help make sure ds isn't overlooked. I will be praying that God will give your heart peace during this time.

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Meredith
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 10:37pm | IP Logged Quote Meredith

Lisa, I am so sorry for your disappointment. It's so hard when our spouse doesn't see things the way we would like hem too. Reach down into your heart on this one, and I'm with Gwen on that novena, it's a wonder how much prayer can help. We'll be praying for you too!!

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stacykay
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 10:45pm | IP Logged Quote stacykay

Lisa,
I am praying for you, your dh, and your dc. Ditto on what all have said above.
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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Rebecca
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Posted: July 31 2006 at 10:54pm | IP Logged Quote Rebecca

Dear Lisa,

I am going to pray to the Blessed Mother to speak to her Son on your behalf. By my praying to Mother Mary, my husband agreed to let our children be homeschooled when he was initially opposed to it. She is a powerful intercessor for us who are mothers, especially in regards to parenting and education.

Love,
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guitarnan
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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 5:34am | IP Logged Quote guitarnan

Lisa,

More prayers headed your way from me...I am thankful you have a Catholic school you can use, but I'm hoping that the powerful 4Real prayers work quickly on your behalf.



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Willa
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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 7:20am | IP Logged Quote Willa

Lisa,
I guess I was in your DH's shoes back when our oldests were that age. They went through 2nd and K in parochial school.   My dh wanted them to be homeschooled but I just couldn't get past the cultural messages and my fear that I would "ruin" them.

The Holy SPirit can really turn things around if it is meant to happen. In our case, weekly Adoration was probably what made the biggest difference in my heart. Our parish started perpetual adoration and each of us signed up for an hour a week. The stillness and power of the Blessed Eucharist stilled my heart and gave me more confidence of faith.

I will pray for you!

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Dawnie
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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 8:38am | IP Logged Quote Dawnie

Lisa,

My dh was initially opposed to homeschooling, too. Our diocese has a stewardship program, which means that if parents tithe and volunteer in their parish/diocese, they do not have to pay tuition for their dc to attend Catholic schools. We could send our dc to Catholic schools and only have to pay for uniforms and books. I asked him to let me try preschool at home, as a trial run, and he was okay with this, since there was really no way we could afford to send dd to Catholic preschool (the stewardship program doesn't cover preschool!). I prayed and asked God to change my dh's mind, if homeschooling was His will. I had done everything I could do--I presented the evidence, shared my thoughts and feelings on the topic. Well, miraculously, dh's mind was changed over the course of the year I homeschooled preschool w/ my oldest dd. I say "miraculously," b/c he was really adamantly opposed to homeschooling when I first started talking to him about it. So, I really believe this is God's will for us, since He changed my husband's heart on the matter.

I will be praying for the same graces in your family, if it is God's will that you homeschool as well.

FWIW, I totally understand your disappointment--I would really miss my kids if they were away at school all day, too.

Hugs to you!

Dawn    

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LisaD
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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 8:44am | IP Logged Quote LisaD

Oh, thank you for your prayers and support, ladies! I can't tell you how much it means to me.

I started the 30 days prayer to St. Joseph, along with the Rosary last night.

I love the line in the St. Joseph prayer, "Obtain for all those who have asked my prayers everything that is useful to them in the plan of God." That is what it all comes down to, isn't it? "Everything that is useful to them in the plan of God."





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Leonie
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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 5:40pm | IP Logged Quote Leonie

I think the novena is very powerful.

And can you two come to some sort of compromise ? Some families here do part time school and oart time homeschool. I am sure that God has given you a heart for homeschooling for a reason and I will pray for you as you share this and come to a mutual agreement with dh...

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LisaD
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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 8:11pm | IP Logged Quote LisaD

Leonie wrote:
I think the novena is very powerful.

And can you two come to some sort of compromise ? Some families here do part time school and oart time homeschool. I am sure that God has given you a heart for homeschooling for a reason and I will pray for you as you share this and come to a mutual agreement with dh...


Well, dh finally agreed that if I or one of the children (or both of the children) was unhappy with our parish school after a semester, then we would pull them out and homeschool. But, he says if I am unhappy, I need to have specific, valid complaints, not just "I'd rather be homeschooling..."

As an aside, I was at the church rectory this morning filling out some paperwork for our baby's baptism. The pastor, Fr. C., who really doesn't know me (huge parish), saw me with my children and immediately asked me if I was a homeschooler!    I guess I must fit the mold. Catholic, with more than the average number of small children.

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Posted: Aug 01 2006 at 10:05pm | IP Logged Quote Maddie

This may have mentioned already, but having a Mass said for a "special intention" is very effective too. I had a Mass said for someone who was away from the church for 30 years and two weeks after the Mass she decided to go to Confession!!!

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Victoria in AZ
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 4:33pm | IP Logged Quote Victoria in AZ

You will be blessed for honoring your dh in this decision.

But of course you can still pray for a change of heart

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LisaD
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Posted: Aug 03 2006 at 11:34pm | IP Logged Quote LisaD

Victoria in AZ wrote:
You will be blessed for honoring your dh in this decision.

But of course you can still pray for a change of heart


It's funny, I've just been praying for God's will to be done, and for both dh and I to have the grace and faith to accept whatever God's will is!

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