Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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MEBarrett
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Posted: June 13 2006 at 3:08pm | IP Logged Quote MEBarrett

Ok experienced twin moms, I'm in full nest mode. So what was the "can't live without it" thing that made life easier for you.

I have the twin nursing pillow (thank you again Shawna!) and I am stocking up on baby clothes and diapers. They'll share a cradle until they get too big

Is there anything that you all found made life a little more convenient? A gadget? A certain type of equipment?

What do I need?


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Donna Marie
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Posted: June 13 2006 at 4:22pm | IP Logged Quote Donna Marie

Well, here is some survival advice from someone that had to do this starting out... the equipment that you need is the "stuff" that makes life easier and can be kept close at hand for an easy grab when needed.

A phone within easy reach of your nursing chair...the TV remote, a pitcher of water and glass...diapers and burping cloths receiving blankets and a snack alll within easy reach of where you choose to nurse...have dh make you up something to nibble on before he leaves for work...

you might be sitting for awhile...the recliner saved my life the first week. Without it I could not have slept at all. But that was just me...home alone with my first born and a green mommy;) at least you hae other hands around to help hold and run for little things!

if one needs to be changed...change them both...if one needs to be nursed, nurse them both....you can stack them on each other and nurse on your side laying down. if they sleep....SLEEP! Don't worry about the dishes and laundry...if they rest...you do too!

When I was sitting, I propped my twins up on 2 pillows (to raise them to a COMFORTABLE height) with receiving blankets under their rear ends and had them nurse with their eyes both looking up at me...one on each side...I can still remember those sweet baby blues 12.5 yrs later...lol Dont try to strain yourself in a weird position...bring THEM to YOU...one of the nurses at the hospital told me that I could roll up a receiving blanket and place it under my breasts to lift them up a little to get me in a better position. You might get a little sore after awhile from nursing two...but it will pass! Hang in there!

umm...choose something to nurse in that you feel comfy in...

and two carseats...I would place the kids in this when I wasn't nursing and pull them around the house after me...may be a bit goofy...but it worked!

sniff...where does all the time go??

HTH!

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Posted: June 13 2006 at 4:43pm | IP Logged Quote MacBeth

I don't have twins, but I have twin cousins Annika's age. I think the best thing my aunt had was a BIG calendar to make sure that every appointment, feeding, medication, etc. got done for her boys, no matter who was looking after them (esp. if she were napping, so she could rest without worrying). OK, she was a late first-time mom, but as we age our brains need help no matter how many kids we already have.

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Posted: June 14 2006 at 12:02pm | IP Logged Quote ShawnaB

Hi Mary Ellen! You're in the final stretch! Yeah!

As you know, my "twins" came rather unconventionally, 10 weeks apart, with the 2nd joining us through adoption. We're starting to feel like we've survived the first year now, as Jillian is just 2 weeks from her first birthday.

Here's my picks for essential gear from multiples:
A double stroller that will accommodate 2 infant carrier car seats. I have the Graco DuoGlide with 2 Graco Snug-ride carrier/car seats. I NEVER used a double stroller before, and I always thought those huge Travel Systems with the click-on car seats were silly. But, with 2 babies, they are really, really convenient. It was so nice to just click the seats into the stroller and go. Its pretty tricky to carry two car seat carriers at once (especially when the babies get heavy), so the stroller really helps. And with two babes, the front pack or sling wasn't helpful, so I actually used the car seat carriers a lot.

Another essential item is a nursing foot stool. To use that big pillow, I needed to raise my lap in order for the babies to both nurse in the football hold position.

As the babies got bigger, I used 2 Graco Johnny Jumpers. I hung them both in a wide doorway opening, and that's how I made dinner! They bounced till their hearts content! And a few Cheerios in the trays extended their happy time significantly!

Now they are both crawling and almost walking, so bouncers and carriers are a thing of the past. We now rely on baby gates and fences, and two outdoor little tikes baby swings hanging on the deck are great for them to enjoy the backyard.

I also really liked the book "Mothering Multiples" by La Leche League. Lots of good ideas. Lucky for you, you have some older ones with helping hands. What a joy these babies will bring to your family! Truly a special, special gift. Keep us updated as you approach the Big Day. I'll be praying for you.


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Posted: June 14 2006 at 12:44pm | IP Logged Quote BrendaPeter

ShawnaB wrote:
A double stroller that will accommodate 2 infant carrier car seats. I have the Graco DuoGlide with 2 Graco Snug-ride carrier/car seats. I NEVER used a double stroller before, and I always thought those huge Travel Systems with the click-on car seats were silly. But, with 2 babies, they are really, really convenient. It was so nice to just click the seats into the stroller and go. Its pretty tricky to carry two car seat carriers at once (especially when the babies get heavy), so the stroller really helps. And with two babes, the front pack or sling wasn't helpful, so I actually used the car seat carriers a lot.


When we had our twins (7 years ago), strollers with the car seat clips were not readily available so I used a regular double stroller & just "jammed" the seats into it. It's probably worth considering how often you'll be taking the babies out when they're little & if you'll have anyone to help you. If you'll always have help, you can probably get by more cheaply with 2 of those stroller/carseat frames.

ShawnaB wrote:
Another essential item is a nursing foot stool. To use that big pillow, I needed to raise my lap in order for the babies to both nurse in the football hold position.


I did'nt have one but should have. Excellent suggestion!

ShawnaB wrote:
As the babies got bigger, I used 2 Graco Johnny Jumpers. I hung them both in a wide doorway opening, and that's how I made dinner! They bounced till their hearts content! And a few Cheerios in the trays extended their happy time significantly!


We were big Johnny Jumper fans for all the kids - but there's nothing like twins jumping in unison!

The best suggestion I ever received came from another mom who led a support group for moms with twins. I have to have a c-section when our twins were born. I did not recover well (incision became infected on top of everything else). As a result, the twins did not get enough milk in the beginning & were not gaining enough weight. I knew I had to take better care of myself but didn't know how to manage it. For some strange reason, whenever one woke up at night, I'd wake the other & nurse them using the pillow while sitting up in a chair. I kept thinking it would make my life easier to feed them simultaneously. Well, that led quickly to utter exhaustion. The leader of the mom with twins support group would call me on the phone from time to time (thank God!) and she recommended that I feed them individually while lying in bed & resting. Also, she told me to keep a snack by my bed. That advice was truly a Godsend! It was still very hectic, of course, but as I started to feel physically better, things started to improve all the way around.

Those 1st few months were very challenging, but our twins were very healthy, thank God, and the time just flew by. Once they hit 3 months, it seems that things were actually easier overall with twins. The fact that they have each other is no small thing! Our twins are also a boy & a girl & they looked so precious dressed up for their 1st Holy Communion (last Sunday - hard to believe) - kind of like a miniature bride & groom.

Dear Mary Ellen, I'll be sending prayers your way! Enjoy this exciting time!



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Posted: June 14 2006 at 4:11pm | IP Logged Quote ShawnaB

I second Brenda's suggestion not to hesitate to nurse the babies individually whenever it feels right. It certainly doesn't need to be all or nothing. My friend who is a lactation consultant and mother of twins encouraged me to do both. She said when she was out in public she nursed individually, since nursing 2 at once is not exactly the most modest activity .Once they reach 4 months or so, and are both nursing quickly and efficiently, its really not a big deal to nurse one and then the other. Also, when you are nursing to comfort a baby, its nice to just sit down and nurse rather than going through the whole riggamarole of strapping on the pillow.

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Posted: June 21 2006 at 9:46pm | IP Logged Quote Angel

My boys are 8 months old now and bottle fed. I didn't get a whole lot of support as far as nursing goes, even though I had nursed 3 kids and the third didn't wean himself until he was 25 months and I was about 16 weeks+ pregnant with my twins. I had always had problems getting through the first 6 weeks because my babies have all been absolutely voracious eaters, and my twins were no exception. I also had both anatomical and familial setbacks which led to my switching to bottles at about 3 weeks. If I had to do it over again, I would do a lot of things differently.

1. I tried to feed the babies tandem way too often because they would both cry at the same time. The nurses in the hospital mostly seemed to figure this was how I ought to be nursing, too. But if one of the babies is having trouble latching, it's really easy to get off to a bad start with sore breasts this way, because you don't have enough hands to adjust everybody. (And my huge nursing pillow took so long to ship that it didn't get to me until AFTER things had completely fallen apart.) Try to have someone around who can try and comfort the other baby while you nurse his/her sibling. It's so much easier this way.

2. Use lots and lots of pillows. I had gotten into a bad habit with my other kids of nursing sitting up and kind of hunched over.

3. You might also pump in the hospital even if you think you don't need to. (Of course if your babies are in the NICU, you'll have to pump, and you might have to deal with nipple confusion as well, like I did with my 3rd baby.) I wish I had started pumping from the very beginning, so my milk supply wouldn't have taken so long to build up. I had two boys and with all the stuff they do to those little guys in the hospital, sometimes they were zonked and just wouldn't really eat. That's bad enough when you're in the hospital 4 days with a C-section and one baby, but it's even worse for your milk supply with twins.

4. Another problem I had was that my husband and motherinlaw were very concerned about me after I came home and was nursing 24 hours a day that when I went to sleep and a baby would wake up, they would feed the baby a bottle and let me sleep for hours. You have to understand that with all the latching problems, etc. that I had mastitis within days after I came home and the only reason I nursed for 3 weeks was because I was taking ibuprofen. One of the babies was gaining all right, but the other wasn't quite, so the doctor urged supplementation, too. Since we had never, ever used a bottle before, even once, we had no idea that you're supposed to use wide nipples rather than narrow ones if you plan to supplement and nurse. At about three weeks, the babies just started refusing to nurse, because it wasn't as easy as eating from the bottle, and so we switched.

I wept bitterly at the time. But now I realize that bottle feeding was what we needed to do in order to survive. The babies weren't gaining, I was in excruciating pain, my help was leaving, I had a 2.5 year old to chase, my oldest son (age 9) had started having mysterious and violent temper tantrums, and I had no idea how I was going to manage the house by myself when I was constantly nursing both babies, and often tandem, which meant I really had to do some acrobatics to be able to read aloud to my kids.

Things didn't go as I had planned, but they did work out. I think that's the biggest lesson I learned from my babies, is that you just do what you have to.

5. Drinking ALOT and eating enough is very important. When I was nursing tandem I never had a hand free to eat with, and my mother-in-law -- bless her heart -- is just not that big on feeding people. I was always off in the recliner, and she was always trying to corral my other three. So I ended up subsisting mostly on muffins left out on the counter, because I never had time enough to get myself anything to eat. If someone will cook nice meals for you and entertain both babies while you shove food in your mouth for fifteen minutes or less, they are worth their weight in gold.

Like everyone else has said, a double stroller is inavluable, but because I have a 3 year old, I wish sometimes that I had a triplet stroller. Also, our car seats get a lot of wear and tear. I used to rock a baby with one foot while holding/calming/feeding the other one. Having two of those fold up travel swings has also saved my life on occasion.

And an extra big diaper bag is good, too.

I just bought a Storchenweige baby wrap. IT's supposed to be strong enough to carry twins. I wish I had had one of these when they were small, so I could have walked them both at the same time. As it was, I spent a lot of time holding both of them in the rocking chair.    


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MEBarrett
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Posted: June 22 2006 at 9:11am | IP Logged Quote MEBarrett

Thanks so much for all of the valuable advice. You are all very generous with your experience.

I am hoping to nurse them. However, I am not a good nurser. I have nursed all five of my others but only three were really successful. My first baby, Ryan had a very poor suck - which we later found out is common in autistic children, they have poor oral motor development. I had mastitis for six weeks, it was undendurable agony and my fever got to 103. I gave up after that. I nursed the next two just fine for a year. Kelli, my 4th baby nursed beautifully for the first two weeks and then I woke up with a serious infection. I was hospitalized for four days and home with a visiting nurse and an IV pole for ten. Three months later I ended up having a lumpectomy to remove an infected mass of tissue and two milk ducts. I had a breast surgeon and two infectious disease doctors caring for me. I nursed on the "good" side but there was very little milk. After the surgery what milk there was dried up.

The idea of nursing two makes me a bit nervous but I am going to give it my best shot. If I need to give a bottle I will. I can't let myself get crazy - it's a short trip for me and doesn't contribute much to the home life.

I have the rocker with the footstool and am shopping for a new double stroller. I appreciate the input. I gave our old double stroller to the local Life Center about two weeks before I conceived these little ones. God laughs and laughs at my plans.

I love the jumper idea, I have one so I'll get another.

It's interesting that many of you suggest feeding them at different times because all the books say feeding them together! I think I'll stick with all of your experience.

I saw the doctor yesterday. Baby Girl is 4 pounds 9 ounces and Baby Boy is 4 pounds 6 ounces. He said that is accurate within a few ounces. They are growing beautifully. I am 32 weeks so they HAVE to stay in for at least 3 more weeks. After that they can come. I have been having contractions for a while now but in the last few days they are starting to really hurt. It feels like things are happening. Cervix is still closed up though.

Next week another sono.

Thanks again for all of your advice and prayers. I am eternally grateful.




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Posted: June 22 2006 at 9:29am | IP Logged Quote BrendaPeter

Hi Mary Ellen,

Good to see how realistic you are. That's very necessary!

Angela's post brought back a flood of memories for me. Considering that her twins are still so little & mine are 7 years old, it's much fresher for her.

My situation was incredibly similar to hers. I got so behind the 8 ball in taking care of & feeding myself - & that really impacted the babies' ability to thrive. Have that juice box & snack (granola bar) on my bedstand at night made all the difference in the world. Mary Ellen, at this point, if you're up to it, it might be good to double everything you cook & freeze some meals. Also if anyone mentions that they'd like to help, suggest that they make you a meal when the babies come. You'll so appreciate that!

btw - I have had excruciatingly sore nipples with all of my dc, but I had no problem with the twins. By #6 I finally figured out, duh, that the problem is usually poor positioning from the get-go. I've also realized that those slippery hospital beds certainly do not help! I believe that because I used the nursing pillow right from the start with the twins, I had no soreness. If you do end up with sore nipples, I have found that the combination of the nipple cream & plastic breast shells really accelerate the healing process.

Hope that helps! Wish I lived close by so I could bring you dinner AND hug the precious little ones !


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Posted: June 22 2006 at 10:04am | IP Logged Quote MEBarrett

BrendaPeter wrote:
   Wish I lived close by so I could bring you dinner AND hug the precious little ones !


Me too! But you wouldn't believe how well taken care of I am. I have piles of tupperware and Gladware on my kitchen table waiting to be returned to all the kind friends who have been bringing us meals for the lst few weeks.

My best friend is bringing me a few groceries I needed and another friend is dropping off her fourteen year old daughter to play with my kids this afternoon so I can rest.

This morning one of the moms whose children go to the parish school my girls used to attend dropped by. She told me she has been thinking of me and praying for the babies so she knitted me two of the most lovely baby blankets. I barely know this lovely lady.

I happen to live in a town with wonderful, big Catholic families. Some homeschool, some not - but all are very generous with their time.

You should all come live here.


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Posted: June 22 2006 at 10:32am | IP Logged Quote Mare

Hi Mary Ellen!

Anticipation is half the fun!

Things that made life easier for me:

* Dh took the first month off of work and did the 9 pm -5am shift while I slept. I then took over from 5 am - 9 pm while he slept and did things around the house.
* Taking care of me first - daily prayer time with my dh; making sure I ate healthy and drank lots of water; getting time each day to get outside either alone or with the children;
* taking people up on their offers for meals, doing my grocery shopping, watching my children
* Enough clothes, onesies, etc. so I only had to do wash once a week
* Enough bottles to get me through the day without having to wash them by hand
* We used an umbrella stroller for the girls when we went out in public. It was easier to store in our car. You can buy attachments to keep two of the same brand umbrella strollers together.

Peace and joy,

Mare


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Posted: June 26 2006 at 9:35pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

MEBarrett wrote:
The idea of nursing two makes me a bit nervous but I am going to give it my best shot.


Awesome, Mary Ellen! You have weathered many breastfeeding challenges. Here are some links about nursing multiples. I will pray that all goes smoothly...you deserve a break!

Love,

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MEBarrett
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Posted: June 27 2006 at 9:37am | IP Logged Quote MEBarrett

Thanks for the link Angie - there was a lot of good stuff there.

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