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misswallo
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| Posted: Nov 04 2014 at 7:16am | IP Logged
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Hi Ladies,
Can I ask you to prayer for wisdom in how to handle a situation. One of my good friends is considering homeschooling her two children, 13 yrs and 14 yrs. Both my friend and her husband work full time. She has asked me to consider homeschooling her children, her idea is they would come to my house two to three times a week for 2 or so hours so I can help them. She has this idea that they can just sit with my two older daughters and just do the same school work along with them. I know my girls would not like that at all. I have many concerns about this. One, her children are defiant. They have always been this way. Her oldest son is failing school even though he is very intelligent. He disrupts class, talks back to his teachers and refuses to do any of his work. Her daughter at least does her school work but she also talks back to the teachers. I have 6 children of my own who all need me throughout the day for help. I feel selfish for not wanting to take this on but I have an obligation to my own children. She has told me not to feel pressured by this but she really wants me to consider it for at least one of her children. We are meeting tonight to go over some information regarding laws in Missouri and to discuss it further. Please pray for discernment, I really think it wouldn't work but I also want to follow God's Will. Any insight? Thank you,
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Missy-married in 1997 dd(99) dd(01) dd(04) dd(06) ds(09) and ds(12)
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guitarnan
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| Posted: Nov 04 2014 at 8:51am | IP Logged
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This is not something I would take on. (In my state, I'm not permitted to, anyway, as parents are required to provide the majority of the instruction if they choose to homeschool. They can't outsource it all.)
I looked up Missouri law, and it does not appear that you could be compensated in any way for homeschooling someone else's children. This would be a deal-breaker for me, because I would be stuck with all the responsibility and nothing to show for it except frustrated children.
Also, her plan doesn't appear to be in compliance with state law. Who will teach the children the rest of the time in order to make up the 1,000 hours required by the state? Can she and her husband juggle their schedules to make that work?
I don't think you are being selfish. She is asking a lot of you (teach her children, keep daily instructional logs, create portfolios, etc.), and she can't pay you to do it. What's selfish about not wanting to give away 300 hours of your life each year for free?
I'll pray for you today...I know it's hard to say no, but sometimes it's the right thing to do.
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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misswallo
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| Posted: Nov 04 2014 at 9:06am | IP Logged
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To be fair, she is planning to pay me, but to me it still wouldn't be worth it. If I understand Missouri law correctly, parents are to provide 1000 hours of instruction..at least 600 of those hours has to be in core subjects. In those 600 hours, 400 of them have to be within the home, so I guess technically she can outsource 200 of the 600 hours. Her idea is that she can homeschool the rest of the subjects at night and on weekends. What is hard about this is her daughter is begging to be homeschooled. She has begged her mom to quit her job, something she doesn't think she can do right now..she thinks she might be able to scale back eventually but until then she wants my help. When she told her daugter she can't quit her job, her daughter begged her to have me homeschool her. My husband was working last night, so I couldn't talk to him about it. I told him about it this morning and he said "No Way". I really have peace about this now, I hope that continues as the day goes on and when she and I are meeting tonight. Thanks for your support.
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Missy-married in 1997 dd(99) dd(01) dd(04) dd(06) ds(09) and ds(12)
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Anneof 5
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| Posted: Nov 04 2014 at 12:53pm | IP Logged
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Oh dear, that would be a huge responsibility, one that I am sure I would not want to take on. Just say no, you do not need to go into detailed explanations. She needs to put her own children first. Your own children need you!
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SallyT
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| Posted: Nov 04 2014 at 1:08pm | IP Logged
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Praying for you as you discern your response.
Sally
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Booksnbabes
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Praying. I think your dh is right on this one. I do hope they are able to figure out a workable solution for their family.
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10 Bright Stars
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Definitely no! Just because you are a homeschool mom doesn't mean you have more time than people that work. You actually have much less time. Sounds to me as if she is just trying to pass off her problems to someone else. Then, when they don't do this or that as far as learning/schoolwork, guess who will be blamed? YOU! So, that she even had the gall to ask is crazy, but I am assuming she wants what she sees that you have and wants what is best for her kids. Having said that, I would ask her if coming home to teach her kids would be an option for her. Sometimes people THINK they have to work to support a certain level of lifestyle. Perhaps take it from that angle? Good luck, but no, no, no! I mean, if the public school teachers can get them to mind, what makes you think you will be able to?
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William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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stefoodie
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| Posted: Nov 11 2014 at 10:52am | IP Logged
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I'd say no, but perhaps give her some ideas on how she can afterschool? Praying for you and your friend's family!
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stef
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misswallo
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| Posted: Nov 11 2014 at 11:23am | IP Logged
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Thanks ladies! Our meeting went well, I told her right at the beginning that I couldn't do it, but gave her lots of resources and ideas. She left feeling very hopeful. I checked in with her a couple of days ago, her son skipped every day of school last week. Our town has an alternative high school for those students who don't fit in the other two public high schools. They are thinking that might be the best for him right now and he seems receptive of that. She shared with me that she has been very depressed the last two year in regards to her son. She feels like she has failed him. Please pray for her. Thank you.
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Missy-married in 1997 dd(99) dd(01) dd(04) dd(06) ds(09) and ds(12)
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MaryM
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Praying for your friend and her son.
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Mary M. in Denver
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Booksnbabes
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| Posted: Nov 11 2014 at 6:01pm | IP Logged
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So glad the meeting went well, thanks for updating. We will keep this family in our prayers.
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4Real Forums : We Pray to the Lord
Topic: prayers for this, please
