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3ringcircus
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| Posted: Jan 14 2014 at 12:54am | IP Logged
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Is pride always a sin?
Today I went to Target and bought bedding for a local shelter that had made a request. As I was leaving, I felt good about this. I felt good about all the progress I've made in my prayer life, and how I'm really working hard to live my faith more and help others in need. And then, I started worrying about being prideful. But then I thought, well geesh, does that mean we're supposed to go around being unhappy and unsatisfied with ourselves all the time? That doesn't make sense either. And what about being proud of our kids? Or telling them to be proud of themselves for their accomplishment? Is it sending a mixed message to say that?
I think the Holy Spirit was telling me that God wants me to be at peace and feel happy when I do good as long as I'm not parading it in others' face or acting/thinking that I'm better than others, but I'd love to start a conversation here on this.
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Christine
Mom to my circus of boys: G-1/06, D-1/04, S-4/10
Started HS in Fall'12
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Jan 14 2014 at 1:36am | IP Logged
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I think there is a difference in feeling proud of an actual accomplishment vs acting prideful.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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JennGM
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| Posted: Jan 14 2014 at 9:37am | IP Logged
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Pride is so tricky. There are roots of pride in all we do. Is it necessarily a sin? Not necessarily, but roots of the sin and could be venial or attachment to sin.
"Pride dies 20 minutes after death.” — St. Francis de Sales.
Although there are 7 Cardinal or Deadly Sins, it is said that pride is the root of all of them!
We have to remember that we are dust and completely dependent on God for EVERYTHING! This means if we do a good act, it's because we have been given the grace to do it. If we make something beautiful, it's because we have a talent from God. If we are remembering to pray and serve God, it's again because He is sending the gifts of grace.
The only thing we are doing is cooperating with grace. We choose with our will. But all the good circumstances should always point back to God, with us being totally grateful. He is giving the graces to us to live united to Him.
Sometimes He gives us those little glimmers of satisfaction, joys or consolations in our life. Later as we delve deeper into the spiritual life He tests us with dry or dark or desert periods to test us in loving Him even when it doesn't feel good.
There is no sin in what you describe, but it's a chance to redirect it all, realizing how dependent on God you are, and to thank Him for all His goodness to you, a most humble servant. It's also a chance for you to direct to God any good you do for His honor and glory, and not directed at you.
Does that make any sense?
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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SallyT
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| Posted: Jan 14 2014 at 10:25am | IP Logged
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Well said, Jenn!
I think pride would say, " . . . and so I'm done! I don't have to learn anything else!"
Or it would say, "Oh, look how So-and-So *didn't* do anything for the shelter, when I did. And I haven't seen her at Holy Hour for a long time, either. Too bad her spiritual life is growing the way mine is."
OR it might say, "All I did was buy bedding! I should be so much better than that. I should be like So-and-So, who bought two packages of bedding for the shelter and makes two Holy Hours every day! Why is my life not like hers?"
In any of those instances (and not that those are the only things pride might say, but they are examples of what it does say), you're in the position of not being grateful to God for what He has done in your life -- including beating yourself (and by extension, God) up for not making you more like this other person, whose struggles you don't know. It's like the flip side of saying, "Thank you, Lord, that I am not like that publican."
Can you tell I talk to my confessor about these things? I love Cardinal Merry de Val's Litany of Humility, too -- which reminds me that it's been a while since I prayed it.
My house theologian and I were talking about this issue not that long ago. He has a story about being at a dinner with a priest (Anglican, I believe) who belonged to some order or society whose rule of life forbade ever, ever talking about the self. So my husband would try to make conversation with this man, and all the man would ever say, when asked about himself, was, "Oh, that's of no importance."
The Rule of Life was well taken, but as my husband said, all that it accomplished, in practice, was to make him far more obsessed with that man and his mysterious life than he would have been had the man just answered his fairly standard dinner-conversation questions. Not that the man was guilty of pride -- he was just following his rule, after all -- but I think we can be self-deprecating to a fault, too. I know St. Josemaria Escriva says something about never accepting compliments or taking pleasure in them, but this seems a little like scrupulosity to me, and fraught with the potential to call far more attention to yourself than if you'd just smiled and said, "Thanks," or allowed yourself a little normal warm glow. And I think there's plenty of room for prudential judgment here . . .
Sally
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CrunchyMom
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| Posted: Jan 14 2014 at 11:22am | IP Logged
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I agree, Sally. It is hard to understand Pride without understanding Humility. I think that true humility is very honest.
From the Catholic Encyclopedia:
Quote:
| To guard against an erroneous idea of humility, it is necessary to explain the manner in which we ought to esteem our own gifts in reference to the gifts of others, if called upon to make a comparison. Humility does not require us to esteem the gifts and graces which God has granted us, in the supernatural order, less than similar gifts and graces which appear in others. No one should esteem less in himself than in others these gifts of God which are to be valued above all things according to the words of St. Paul: "That we may know the things that are given us from God." (1 Corinthians 2:12). Neither does humility require us in our own estimation to think less of the natural gifts we possess than of similar, or of inferior, gifts in our neighbours; otherwise, as St. Thomas teaches, it would behove everyone to consider himself a greater sinner or a greater fool than his neighbour; for the Apostle without any prejudice to humility was able to say: "We by nature are Jews, and not of the Gentiles sinners" (Galatians 2:15). A man, however, may generally esteem some good in his neighbour which he does not himself possess, or acknowledge some defect or evil in himself which he does not perceive in his neighbour, so that, whenever anyone subjects himself out of humility to an equal or to an inferior he does so because he takes that equal or inferior to be his superior in some respect. Thus we may interpret the humble expressions of the saints as true and sincere. Besides, their great love of God caused them to see the malice of their own faults and sins in a clearer light than that which is ordinarily given to persons who are not saints. |
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Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
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[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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CrunchyMom
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I think, too, that the English language tends to use the word pride to describe a broad range of ideas. For instance, you can say one takes "pride" in their appearance. On the one hand, they could be vain. On the other, they could simply be attentive in a way that recognizes their innate dignity as a person. Vainglory and dignity are two different beasts.
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Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
My Symphony
[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Jan 14 2014 at 11:50am | IP Logged
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I struggle with feelings of pride, because pride really can lead you down a dark road.
What helps me is to remember that I can only buy the sheets because God has been so generous to give me the extra money to do so. I try to think: Thank you. Lord, for giving me this opportunity to help others. Please bless and help the people who will use these sheets.
As Jenn says, it is good to redirect!
Also, I heard Dr. Meg Meeker say in a talk recently that we are all equal at the foot of the cross. I try to keep that in mind.
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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JennGM
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| Posted: Jan 22 2014 at 12:41pm | IP Logged
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An antiphon in today's morning prayer in the Magnificat reminded me of this discussion:
Whoever boasts, should boast in the Lord. 2 Cor 10:17
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Pride
