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rebeccam
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| Posted: Nov 30 2012 at 3:20pm | IP Logged
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Hi everyone,
The issue of whether to take part in secular Christmas, in any way, comes up every year for us because we are converts while all of my family and all of my husband's family celebrate secular "festivus." We only want to celebrate with our Christian friends for our own hearts as well as our children's hearts and formation. A celebration at our relatives' houses not only ignores Christ, but if we mention Him an argument is sure to ensue. Having the family over here is uncomfortable because we don't feel comfortable talking about Jesus around them and yet we are here in our orthodox Catholic home during a Christ-centered Feast.
I am wondering what those of you with similar predicaments do during the Christmas season.
Thank you!
Rebecca
Son 10, Daugher 7, Son 4, Son 1 and another due in June
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Nov 30 2012 at 3:25pm | IP Logged
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There's room for many types of celebrations.. and spending time with family is lovely.. so perhaps choose to keep Christmas Day for your immediate family and go and spend time "during the season" (which may mean during Advent) with the other parts of your family.
Perhaps a New Year's Eve party (where you can leave early "because of the children") would be easier since it's a Secular holiday anyway.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Booksnbabes
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| Posted: Nov 30 2012 at 4:59pm | IP Logged
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We try to keep family celebrations separate from the important liturgical celebrations, so we keep Christmas Day for ourselves and do gatherings on others. We set this as a precedent over a decade ago, and we still have to remind people that date is not an option for family gatherings. 
We do this not because our families do not share our faith, but because they focus so much more on gift giving and the true meaning gets totally lost in it all (we're a bit more "Church militant" than they  ). We enjoy the gatherings and the festivities and the food, but we don't like the let-down our kids exhibit when all the gift giving happens before Christmas. I know they enjoy it, and I love to give gifts, so these things have their place, but they shouldn't take the place--does that make any sense?
One thing I'm struggling with and that DH and I are discussing this Advent is how to keep Advent as a time of preparation. Both family gatherings are before Christmas this year, and I think we are going to ask that from now on we schedule for after Christmas. The focus gets pulled too far away from Christ with the gift giving and we'd rather have the culmination of Advent be Midnight Mass with additional festivities as a continuation of the Christmas joy--so more in keeping with the liturgical season.
I agree with Jodie, just keep the day to yourselves and have family gatherings at other times--New Years is a great idea. If they aren't really celebrating Christmas, it should be easier to celebrate on a different day, I would think.
Oh, and if you need a reason for having the gatherings after Christmas, just mention that everything goes on sale after Christmas, so it will be a big savings. (That would work for many in my family!  )
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Wife to wonderful DH, mom to SIX beautiful gifts from God!
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knowloveserve
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| Posted: Nov 30 2012 at 6:22pm | IP Logged
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Yep, last year we finally put an end to driving to see our families of origin on Christmas (3 hours away). We now keep the day simple, quiet, joyful and memorable with just us. And I will FIERCELY protect this now!
We compromise by seeing the families around New Years also; so everyone saves gifts for us until then and we feel like we are giving them their due time with the grand kids, etc.
It's perfect! And it helps the kids know that Christmas doesn't END on the 25th... But really just begins the festivities!
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Ellie
The Bleeding Pelican
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Christmas with secular relatives
