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Topic: What's so great about a perfectionist?

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mamaslearning
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Posted: March 30 2012 at 4:48pm \| IP Logged

I am a perfectionist and I hate it!

I have such unrealistic expectations of myself and others. Of course, they will never be met, so I'm always angry or disappointed about something that went wrong. Ugh! Lord, why? Why can't I be easy going?

Please help pad my vanity a bit

and help me find the good in being wired this way! I'm so deep in it right now I can't see anything but the negative.

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Lara
DD 11, DS 8, DS 6, DS 4
St. Francis de Sales Homeschool

DominaCaeli
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Posted: March 30 2012 at 5:15pm \| IP Logged

I am a perfectionist too, and one benefit I have seen is my husband's trust. He has full confidence that I will handle various tasks he gives me without his management--he knows I will do the needed research, put in the required work, and manage things with attention to detail in a timely and accurate way. That extends even to my management of the home and of the children's education--serious matters, for sure. The documents, travel, and communications for the international adoption of our son was one of the most complicated and difficult projects that I have come up against, and I basically managed it single-handedly, just telling my husband where to sign and where to show up.

He is constantly bothered by his employees at work not being thorough, not finishing projects on time, not thinking things through before tackling tasks. I have teased him that he's spoiled by my perfectionism here at home (he has a bit of perfectionism in him too!) and that he can't expect that from everyone!

But he truly is able to relax in the knowledge that I always get things done, and I'm happy to be able to provide that feeling for him.

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Celeste
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3ringcircus
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Posted: March 30 2012 at 5:15pm \| IP Logged

Perfectionists are often well-prepared and helpful to those of us who go w/ the flow too much (and find ourselves needing something)

Perfectionists are dependable and timely.

Perfectionists inspire those around them to also do their best.

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Christine
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mamaslearning
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Posted: March 30 2012 at 5:36pm \| IP Logged

DominaCaeli wrote:

I am a perfectionist too, and one benefit I have seen is my husband's trust.

I never thought about being trusted as being a "side effect" of perfectionism.

I can see it now, though. I'm always given the important task because I allows follow through.

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Lara
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St. Francis de Sales Homeschool

mamaslearning
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Posted: March 30 2012 at 5:37pm \| IP Logged

3ringcircus wrote:

Perfectionists are often well-prepared and helpful to those of us who go w/ the flow too much (and find ourselves needing something)

Perfectionists are dependable and timely.

Perfectionists inspire those around them to also do their best.

Yes, I am timely! And yes, it irritates me when others can't seem to make it on time to anything!

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Lara
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Angie Mc
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Posted: March 30 2012 at 10:40pm \| IP Logged

Perfectionists get plenty of practice at failing because they try *so darn hard, so darn often*

and at learning over and over again that only God is Perfect. This is a HUGE lesson to learn.

Lara, you don't have to be perfect. Really you don't

. You can make mistakes. Really you can! God loves *you*.

Love,

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Angie Mc
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mamaslearning
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Posted: March 31 2012 at 11:51am \| IP Logged

I've been reading a book, and for the life of me can't remember the name right now, but it stated:

"Mistakes are gifts of wisdom."

I figure, with all the mistakes I've made I should be the wisest person on earth right now!

Thanks for helping me swap some negatives with some positives!!

It truly helps!

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Lara
DD 11, DS 8, DS 6, DS 4
St. Francis de Sales Homeschool

JennGM
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Posted: March 31 2012 at 12:37pm \| IP Logged

I am a perfectionist, too. But I look at these tendencies through the looking at my temperament, which is a combination of melancholic / choleric.

Angie summed it up nicely. We are called to be perfect as our heavenly Father is perfect, but we will not reach that here. If I keep in mind that I cannot do anything except through Christ, I can find a way to balance my perfectionist tendencies. Learn to pull the trigger, not because it's good enough, but to follow through and complete something. Setting deadlines helps my tendencies.

A person with these tendencies is usually more organized, even if it's underneath at times.

I think there is a combination seeing both the big picture but also the details. Detail oriented is crucial for success of all endeavors.

I'm the person that is prepared, has the checklists and thinks ahead. My siblings have shared that they could rest and relax knowing that I was thinking through and preparing for our little events.

I also think a perfectionist has a vision of beauty, which is appreciated by others.

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Jennifer G. Miller
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jawgee
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Posted: March 31 2012 at 1:40pm \| IP Logged

I'm a perfectionist, too, which usually means that I won't try anything new because I wouldn't want to fail.

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Monica

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