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LML22 Forum Newbie
Joined: June 29 2006
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Posted: Aug 20 2010 at 4:18pm | IP Logged
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I feel stuck. I have hs many years 15 and still have several kids to go. I have been struggling with anxiety and depression for years but just recently discovered it (last 9 months). I am doing better than I was but not great. I feel trapped to homeschool. I have no other option. Homeschool overwhelms me. Public schools where I live are awful and Catholic school is too expensive for my family. I just want to rest and be well.
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
Online Status: Offline Posts: 12234
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Posted: Aug 20 2010 at 4:21pm | IP Logged
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Is doing something like homeschool on the computer an option? Something where you don't have all the planning and such to do.. just something to keep the kids moving forward for a time so that you can rest more and then come back to it in half a year, a year.. whatever works.
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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guitarnan Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005 Location: Maryland
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Posted: Aug 20 2010 at 4:35pm | IP Logged
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Also, for your younger children particularly, could you do the basics at home and then have them join a co-op, 4-H, Scouts or something like that for science, etc.?
And there are some great videos/DVDs out there for history and science, for all ages, via the library and Netflix...
__________________ Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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mom3aut1not Forum All-Star
Joined: May 21 2005
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Posted: Aug 20 2010 at 6:46pm | IP Logged
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I don't know if this is an option, but I used some of Clonlara's online classes with my oldest when we needed to have her work with someone else. (This is a high school option, not for lower grades.) Even with just a couple of courses, it really helped me out by lowering stress for both of us. The Teaching Company has some great dvd courses for high school as well. (Just be certain to get their courses on sale! Every course they have goes on sale at some point each year.)
For younger kids, perhaps you could find something you would enjoy sharing even if it is not especially academic? The history of knitting? History via a study of music? Food the world over? I know that depression may be making everything less appealing, but I hope there is something, something that you have usually enjoyed. Or looking into something you have never done -- like flying an airplane or painting. Use something that sparks your interest as the focus of your family's studies. Forget grammar and spelling for a bit.
I am not trying to say that you should be the center of all things learning, but that it will be easier for you to share something you love with your children, and right now you need easier. You need to
have something that is not draining. Your kids would benefit as well imo.
Could you have a semester of informal studies focused on field trips you have never gotten around to? Local nature centers? (Personally, I want to go a special botanical center that focuses on native plants of the area and how to use them, but I haven't gotten around to it yet.) Small museums usually overlooked? Is there anything fun you could do with your kids?
And the Scouts suggestion is a great one -- even if your kids are not scouts, you can still use the merit badge booklets. 4H or a co-op would be good as well. And these suggestions -- the first two at least -- are not grade specific so you could use them for more than one kid.
You have my sympathy. I don't know if anything I have written is helpful, but I hope you get some relief from whatever source works best for you.
In Christ,
__________________ Deborah
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Servant2theKing Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 13 2005
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Posted: Aug 21 2010 at 9:36am | IP Logged
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Beyond practical ideas for homeschooling, I would highly recommend doing whatever you can to deal with your own health first. When I was pre-menopausal and eventually menopausal, I experienced very intense anxiety...I can only describe it as continually feeling like I was going to fall off a cliff and constant PMS, magnified many times over. Proper medication; vitamin, mineral and herbal supplements; lessening stress; and many, many prayers were my lifelines during those years. I want to encourage you that there is a light at the end of the tunnel that you will be able to see more clearly when your health issues are under better control!
I echo the idea of doing something you love with your family! This Summer we've done some things we've never been able to do before and have revisited some simple things that bring us joy. I think this has been our Summer of Recovery from some of the frightful years!
Little changes in day-to-day routine can go a long way
toward lessening stress, and alleviating anxiety and depression. If all you can manage is reading aloud with with your children, while you rest and take care of your frazzled soul, then let that be the pace you set for your homeschooling during this season. Perhaps you could allow older children to take care of domestic chores, and simply focus your attention on reading and praying together. As you improve, studying together as a family can be enriching, enjoyable and much easier on Mom. I've never been able to manage activities outside the home during the difficult years....such things only served to increase my stress. But, if group activites away from home would take some of the pressure of homeschooling off of you, then that might be a positive solution for your situation...only you, your dh and family can determine what is best for you.
We've been homeschooling since 1990 and I feel the best years still lie ahead! Tell yourself that you will not be in this place of discouragement forever. Just as there is relief (and joy) after birthing our childrens' physical bodies, a similar season will come as we birth their souls into adulthood and prepare them for Eternity! Our main mission in homeschooling is to help our families get to heaven!
I always have to take things in baby steps, reminding myself that any strides forward are progress, no matter how small they may seem. I never could have done some of the things we've done this Summer during the worst years...they're small things, that might seem insignificant to others who may not have such struggles...but one small endeavor can lead us a little bit closer to the ability to take other baby steps forward. One caution in overcoming anxiety and depression...never compare yourself to others and avoid reading all the wonderful things others are doing. God does not measure our lives by the accomplishments of others...He simply looks at whether we have tried to follow His will in our own lives, as best as we are able.
If you struggle with seeing anything positive in your life or in homeschooling it can help tremendously to keep a list, posted in a prominent spot, of the blessings in the life you are living! Even if your list would only contain one or two things, post it where you can continually focus your thoughts on what is good and pure and true and holy in your life! Add to the list as you start to see the light at the end of the tunnel you feel stuck in.
May our Lord bless your heart, mind, body and soul with healing grace, abundant peace, pure serenity and true joy. Entrust yourself and your family to His Divine plan for your lives and try as much as you are able to rest in His perfect Mercy and Love! You are in our prayers!
__________________ All for Christ, our Saviour and King, servant
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