| Author | |
LucyP
Forum All-Star
Joined: Aug 05 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 791
|
| Posted: Aug 19 2010 at 12:53pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
The different things in the news recently about FHC and it being at 7 or below for most children comes at a good point for us as we just confirmed today that in our parish/diocese the rule is the child must be in Year 3 at school, which means our son has two years to wait - he is 7 in December but will be 8 and a half at his FHC. Apparently there is no way round it - and the lady who is organising it all, said that as her son would be too young at 7 my son would be too.
I also asked about doing prep at home - I think it is too important to just drop my son off for 1 x a month sessions at church, he is not used to group settings and does not work/learn well in them, and  I just don't like the "fascism" of being told "do it this way and no other way". Apparently the overseeing priest will in no way allow us to do prep at home because it is important for DS to have friends and do the course together...which he has friends and we see FHC as being about the child and Jesus, not the child and their mates.
So I am thinking do we just accept this or not? Our son has been longing to be 7 and start prep, and he has been wanting to receive the Lord since he was 4, and grudgingly accepting us saying he had to wait to be 7. Of course it is something to offer up etc, but I also do believe that FHC shouldn't be a case of a reward for learning some stuff but also about building the child up in faith, the way it builds me up in faith.
A couple of people have suggested I find resources and prep DS, then find a priest outside our diocese to agree to interview DS and give him FHC "privately" if he shows adequate understanding. Has anyone done this? I am worried about being prideful, and/or getting a reputation as a stroppy mother - especially after I asked if my son could make a confession and was told nothing was more ridiculous than giving a 6.5 year old the sacrament of reconciliation when he asked for it!
I don't want to be a troublemaker or embarrass a priest by asking him to do something he ought not do or whatever, but I don't get why I keep banging my head up against these "rules and regulations" that are not official but apparently are rigid. I have seen DH affected by the rules and set ways of doing things, and I don't want to see DS feeling disappointed and let down, and kept away from Jesus too.
Does this sound rational or like I am a crazy lady?
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
KauaiCatholic
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 25 2009
Location: Hawaii
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 535
|
| Posted: Aug 19 2010 at 3:47pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
oh, my prayers go out to you. I don't have advice but wanted to affirm you. we didn't have the age issue here but we, too, were told we'd have to go through the motions of CCD prep, even though the training they received was EXTREMELY rudimentary and classtime was mostly full of disciplining the unruly, IMO. we did daily prep work here at home and thankfully our DS didn't mind sitting through the required class once a week ... he got to do crafts at least, and didn't mind the "socialization" as much as I did (racial taunting of white kids begins early here   ).
anyway, we survived and his FHC was a blessing. but your situation sounds much more complicated. I don't have any experience with going outside the parish/diocese for help, but maybe someone here can offer words of advice. in the meantime, I'm praying for wisdom, peace and conviction for you and special blessings of protection over the sweet heart of your DS. Blesssed Imelda Lambertini is probably smiling down on him. 
__________________
 Viviane
Grateful mama of Jonah Augustine ('01), Sophia Marie ('05) and Luke Dominic ('10)
We can do no great things; only small things with great love. -- Blessed Teresa of Calcutta
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Erin
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 23 2005
Location: Australia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 5814
|
| Posted: Aug 19 2010 at 4:10pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Well I am rebel  so no I don't accept these situations, the Church clearly gives me the right as the parent to make the choice. If you want this you will have to think outside the box and come up with other solutions.
In our old parish this was the deal too, priest was inflexible and we had to join in at the school. Not an easy matter logistically and we were not happy with the program. Nor was I happy with the FHC as it was clearly a school event not a Parish one.
My solution was to start a homeschool camp where any child who attends is able to make his FHC, the second year I approached our Bishop and he now also comes and confirms the children. Even children outside the diocese, providing they have written permission from their Bishop.
Or perhaps you could organise a Day Camp?
If this is not an option for you, the suggestions of other people may be something you have to seriously look at. Do you know of any priest who is sympathetic to homeschooling?
__________________
Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
allegiance_mom
Forum Pro
Joined: June 26 2007
Location: New York
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 163
|
| Posted: Aug 20 2010 at 1:48pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
In our Diocese the normal age is the end of third grade for FHC. Our Bishop allows our homeschool support group to have our own FHC ceremony at a monastery, and there is no minimum age.
For Confirmation, the normal age is 11th grade here. Our Bishop himself confirms our children in a ceremony just for our group. It is biennial, and the child must be 14. (Still too old, I think, but much better than 17.) The way my son's birthday falls, he will turn 14 in an off year, so he will be 15-and-a-half when confirmed.
This was all possible because decades ago some mothers got together and formed our group and asked the Bishop. Maybe you could talk with other Catholic homeschool families in your Diocese? You never know, the worst your Bishop can say is "no." But with the Pope's newest statement about FHC age, you do have some pretty powerful arguments on your side!
__________________
Allegiance Mom in NY
Wife 17 years
Mom to two boys, 14 and 8, and one pre-born babe in Heaven (Jan 2010)
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: FHC not until 8.5 yrs old
